This time of year is most often used for some self-reflection; what you had planned and how it turned out.
I thought, what if God did that too (assuming we think God exists, of course). So I made a song about that situation.
It is not really a Christmas song, although, looking at all things hapening...

It is called LOST
On Soundcloud: https://on.soundcloud.com/ngpx3

I also made a video (one of the two I ever did, so I'm very excited what you think of it.
The link to YouTube:

I made the song some years earlier, but I changed a lot of it and did a total remix. It must sound well now
Let me know what you think.

Technical issues
===========================
Style is _DANCE2U.STY (Dance To You Soulful Dance Rock), Key: E, tempo 100 Bpm

RealTracks in style: 2615:Bass, Electric, FunkPumpingQuarters Ev 100
RealTracks in style: 1404:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm Soul70sWarmA-B Ev16 100
RealTracks in style: 2905:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm BrightBluesyPopColin Ev 100
RealTracks in song: 4165:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm RockNewWave80sPowerChOverdriveMute Ev 120
Loop in Song: Chillout\Chillout - autumn_82_flute_e_minor .wav
RealTracks in song: 3351:Guitar, Baritone Electric, Rhythm SwampyBluesBrent Ev 095
RealDrums in style:Disco and metal drums [Multi]
And some sounds inserted in Logic Pro
Me: vocals

Lyrics
Lost
(c) HWBerkhout, dec 2020/dec, 2023

V
If you had seen me, I was smiling
I had created you!
If you had heard me, I was cheering;
You lived on my earth too
V
My whole heart was beating for you
'cause I loved humanity
Only my commandments you soon forgot
That was really hard to see for a God

Chorus
I thought the earth would be a stunning place
to live a happy life
Where harmony would be in the air
and peace was everywhere

V
Now my heart skipped some beats
Because nothing went so well
All I ever asked is misled
by false preachers of heaven and hell

Chorus
I thought the earth would be a stunning place
to live a happy life
Where harmony would be in the air,
Instead you created despair

V
If you can hear me, you can change it
I hope I can give you some signs
But I see more anger and frustration
Those were no goals of mine
V
If you believe me, you can change it
Still I don't see your signs
I only see more fear and disillusions
Not the goals of mine
V
If you see me, you must change it
But I fear there isn't much time
I see more greed, wars and stupidity
Not the goals of mine

Chorus
I thought the earth would be a stunning place
to live a happy life
Where harmony would be in the air
and peace everywhere

So I think you got it now
I've lost,
I've lost...

Thanks and a very happy Christmas and New Year,
Hans

Hans, good song
Good vocal and mix
Although I do not agree with your lyrics I still think this is a good song.

Hi Hans,

Your music is always original, interesting, and well done. Like Mario, I have a different view than your lyric portrays. But that's okay. Your talent shines through. The arrangement is killer, as is the production. You are a man loaded with talent. I admire your recording skills.

Take care,

Alan

Hans, enjoyed your tune! Nice arrangement, harmonic movement and choice of instruments. REALLY like your vocals and the entire mix is super smooth. The musical ending was cool, too. Interesting lyrical excursion, think you accomplished your intent. Well done!

Hans,

Excellent song and excellent vocal... Love the arrangement and mix. Your usual high standard all around.

Bob

You are a very good songwriter, Hans, and this is no exception.

Excellent vocal as per usual, also nice job on the production.

Also thought you did a decent job on the video, well done!

Best to you and yours for Christmas!

Cool video! God told me herself that she sees plenty of harmony in the air --right there in your wonderful song.

I really like the composition. Lyrics as only you could produce, and vocals that soar from a golden throat, harmony to please the gods. Cool progression too, and I like how you accent the 3rd and 4th bets occasionally.

And, of course, the ending is the cat's meow.

Cool song idea and good lyrics. I definitely agree with your lyrics, Hans.
I like the song

And the video was pretty cool too! Good work here too.

Hi, Hans.

Nice idea, and well executed. There are a number of phrases that sound a bit "off" in English, but they work fine.

My only comment is really about the end - it doesn't quite fit for me. The line in the verse:

   If you see me, you must change it

implies there's time, but it then jumps right to:

   So I think you got it now
   I've lost,
   I've lost

I understand the point, but I'd expected something along the lines of "Well, I guess this must be what people want paradise to be."

Nice work on the video, but it's a bit too literal for my taste. But that's just me.

Hi Mario,

Thanks a lot for listening to this song, despite the difference of opinion on the subject.
It's not a problem that we disagree, it's a problem if we can't deal with it. And we know we can...


Very nice days, Mario,
Hans

Hi Al,

Thanks for your so nice words about the song.
It doesn't matter if we can't share the same feelings about the lyrics, although, a good conversation with a glass of (red) wine can create bridges...


Have a nice Christmas and New Year,
Hans

Hi David,

I skipped some commentators to answer you first. Otherwise it would stay in my head forever...
And Ron, Bob, Dave, Marty and BD, I come back to you. So, don't get mad at me.
First I must answer you, David:


At first, thanks a lot for your comment, your thoughts and thorough research on the lyrics.
I agree that there was a 'bit off word' in the first chorus ('to live a happy life'). I said 'and' instead of 'a'.
I noticed it after publication and decided to leave it in. If you've heard more odd words, let me know.

About that line "if you see me, you have to change it" you wrote from there, I drew that conclusion he has lost.
But I don't think that's the case.
If you take a look at the structure of the lyrics you see that from that first chorus, God becomes more and more frustrated with what is happening with or by his creations ("not the goals of mine")
He tried to receive hopeful signals from humanity, but received nothing. Instead, he noticed that no one is doing anything and that things are actually getting worse...
As a result, he comes to the conclusion that, with all his wonderful plans and intentions for the Earth and humanity, he has lost it.
That is that bridge you said you were missing.

And as for the video: it was my first, although it still has to be done well. I do think that it is always a matter of taste how you make songs, videos, etc.
Since the song is about something delicate (religion), I thought I would make this video in literal steps to avoid sensitive mistakes.
Although I am not religious at all, I am pretending in this song that there is a God (!), but that he is certainly not happy with what he sees. I wouldn't be either...

Very nice days ahead and thanks again,
Hans

Hi Hans.

I love this groove and the way that you used it. I tip my proverbial hat to you. You've created a really fine song.

Writing a lyric where God is in first person really grabs a listener's attention.

I sympathise with your lyrics. When I look around the world and see so much greed, so many people recklessly hating and hurting other people, and ecological environments everywhere collapsing because of mankind's impact on nature, it's very easy to wonder, "Where is God?"

You've told a really good story and you've done it with musical expertise

All the very best to you,
--Noel

Hans,

An interesting song idea. Nicely done.
You sing with passion.
The BAND is excellent. Nice mix.
You did a nice job o n the video.

fj

Hi Mario,

Although you disagree with my lyrics, still you watched the video or listened to the song. That must have been a challenge!
I appreciate you did it.


I don't want to start a discussion on the lyrics. They are what they are.
But I will explain a bit:
I mainly made them because I am concerned about what is happening nowadays.
And I thought it would be a nice idea to use another perspective. Although I know it can be a sensitive angle.

Very nice days,
Hans

Hi Alan,


Thank you for all the beautiful words you wrote about me!
I appreciate you listened to my song, despite your problems with the content of the lyrics.
As I wrote to Mario, I will explain why I wrote them this way:
I am concerned about what is happening nowadays. I made quite a few song about that topic, as you know.
I wanted to avoid becoming a caricature of that messenger (the one with long gray hair and a sign above his head that said "the world is ending"). You certainly know that drawing...
That's why I changed that angle in this song.

Nice days ahead,
Hans

Hi Ron, thanks for those beautiful and encouraging words!
I only think I haven't excactly accomplished my intent, I'm afraid...

Hans

With a cool funky rhythm and your strong vocals nothing can go wrong Interesting angle, I can recall only couple of songs from this point of view. You have told the idea well, I can feel God's desperation. Naybe I have added 'please help me' line in the end, although I think Eden is still a stunning place, hopefully humans will never get back there to ruin it too...

Thanks for the cats in the video, are they yours? Every video should have at least one cat Happy holidays and very creative new year 2024!

Janne

Hans,

I was just speaking with God a few minutes ago and He told me to tell you how much He loves you and He's giving you a big hug from afar.

He said He listened to your song and He's sorry that you're so down in the dumps here at Christmas time, but that he loves you anyway and knows that you're one heck of a nice guy.

He said He's just sending some super hugs from heaven and hoping that you have a very very Merry wonderful and fantastic Christmas with your family and that one day He'll see you soon and He'll give you a big old fat kiss on the cheek and just tell you how much he loves you, and He will have His big Godly arms wrapped around you, and can't wait till you can come visit him in heaven, cuz you're one heck of a guy.

Also He said to tell you to cheer up a little bit and go have a beer or something cuz it's not that bad.

He said beer is proof that God loves you and wants you to be happy.

Happy holidays!!

Nice work on creating the melody. Singing is strong too. The balance in the mix sounds perfect.

My favorite line: "All I ever asked is misled/by false preachers of heaven and hell."

Hi Bob, Dave, Marty and Brain,

Thanks for letting David C be answered first.
But your waiting is now rewarded!
Althoug waiting...?
I don't think anyone has been sitting still.
A lot of work must have gone into listening and responding to all the new songs added to this forum.
And all this, while you were eagerly awaiting my response.


Bob, thanks again for listening to this song of mine. And also for your nice compliments.
I like your use of the word 'usual' here!


Dave, thanks for this very nice response!
I showed it to my sons, but I don't see any hopeful signs that they are being impressed...
But you do! And that's much better for me!


Marty, my most loyal listener! Thanks again for your beautiful response!
I must make one comment; Did you look closely at the first image in my video and did it lead you to the conclusion that God is a she (because actually I used a 'she' there)? Or did you already know that?
We'll discuss that later when you visit me (not God). And when I was finnishing the video I saw a movie from that little kitten. I thought he was dying, but then I saw the mother cat dragging him out of frame.
I liked that as an ending


Brain, master of video and AI (in my opinion), thanks for your very nice words.
One day we must make a song with your AI-girls and me making some kind of Blues...


I wish you all a nice time and especially a good 2024!
Hans

Hello Hans
Excellent song
Great sound, great melody, great singing and playing.
The background track is excellent
You put so many details into the song
But everything makes sense and moves the song forward
This is really great work Hans
Also the video is very well done, make more videos to your songs. it will be worth it
Wishing you and your loved ones a Merry Christmas
Many greetings
Andi ;-)

Hi Noel, Floyd and Jannesan

You all gave me a very nice present with your wonderful responses. Thanks!

Noel, that tipping to your hat stayed in my mind. Very nice.
I fantasized what I would do if I were that creator and in the same way you asked "where is God". You do that automatically, I thought.
Probably not.
Of course I am curious how forum members would react to this song/ video, but on the other hand this is not the place for a deep discussion on it.
It's better to have a discussion about the musical or instrumental choises and that sort of things.
In that respect it is nice to read that I have done well. Thanks for that.


Floyd, it's nice to hear from you again. And in what way...! Thanks for your compliments!
Also about that (first) video. Feels really good.


Janne, Very lovely words from you. Thanks!
I start with the cats. No they are not mine. I have 2 black cats, a mother and daughter (the only survivor of 5. And two visitor cats who like to join the meals...
That part of the movie was about that kitten. I thought it was dying, but the film turned out to be longer than the piece I used. In that other part a mother cat came into view and dragged the little one out. I liked that more.
And I added the 'meoww' sound.
The story: There is some reference to that 'help me' you wrote about. It is in the part where I (the God) asked for signs. But I haven't thought to ask for help verbally, because I am the supreme being myself!
I haven't been to Eden, have you? ;-) , but no, don't allow people to come there!


Thanks for the Christmas wishes. I wish you the same and let's continue making music in 2024!
Hans

Hi David, 

I’m so glad you made it home again from your visit to me. Few do. 
But sadly you missed the point in our conversation; maybe Hans is a bit down too, but his song was about me and how I feel nowadays.
I thought you understood that, but apparently you didn't.
I also hoped you, with all your expertise, would have told Hans what you think of the song itself, the technical aspects, the melody, the chosen instruments etcetera.

So, you can understand I'm a little disappointed about that. However, I really think you're a really nice and so creative chap. A bit like Hans.
Why don't you make a song together for or about me? Let me know what you think of that.

Here is what you really must do, David; tell Hans you're sorry you made a mistake about whose emotions were involved in the song, and also that you neglected to mention what you thought of the song itself. Then give him a kiss on his cheek and whisper in his ear what a marvelous song and video he created. 
After that, you are welcome back anytime!

ALL ME


You too and let's meet again in 2024!

Hi Scott,

Thanks for writing this post! And I'm glad you liked that line in particular.
I thought it to be the sentence a lot of people would disagree on.


A happy 2024!
Hans

Hi Andi,

Well, I do like what you wrote about this song. Now I have a big smile on my face!!!
It is my intention to make more videos. But I wasn't sure I could make them.
That feeling is now diminishing, because all the reactions I received to this one and another were very positive.


Andi, I wish you the same in return!
And special greetings to 'Wollie'

Cool one Hans,
I did think the stops needed to be more dramatic though - it is a drama filled narrative after all. A tiny bit of delay or slight rise in volume at the point of the stops might work.
Gentle disco.

Good clean sound there, Hans.
I hope Santa doesn't get lost.

Vic

I have listened to this multiple times - my thoughts are below. I recognise the time, effort and talent you have put into this. Sorry if you feel any of the negative comments are harsh or unjustified. Thanks a lot for posting the song.
Date: 25/12/2023
System: Mackie Studio monitors
--------------------------------------------------
Genre 70s Pop
Duration 4 40
Overall impression
A lot of time and effort has clearly gone into this in terms of both the composition and the production.
I’m guessing that English is not your first language Hans, which makes this a very creditworthy lyric. It also explains the slight anomalies of word and line stress which occur from time to time.
Song (musical structure, melody, lyric, …)
Nice simple melody and chord progressions which flow nicely, particularly in verse section.
Ambitious lyrical theme.
Instrumentation
The guitars should be mentioned – not flashy but very effective in the context of the song. Are they played or generated?
All the patches are well chosen

Mix / Production
Good use of l/r spectrum giving the track a nice full sound
What I really liked
Cool 70s pop style groove
What could be improved
Singing not always accurate in terms of pitch (1:01)
I’m finding the track a little too long (but then again I invariably do) – maybe one ‘I thought the earth…’ sections too many in this one.
Well done on putting the video together!

Awesome tune Hans. Excellent vocal and message in the lyrics. Happy New Year...

Hans,
Strong composition. Good vocals and clear mix. I guess lyrics might seem controversial to some, I don't judge. Interesting phrase structure and performed well.
Good mix and listens well.
Happy New Year to you. (well... happier... I hope)
Misha.

This reminds us of our many musings on “why” so many awful things happen to innocent children. The video was very good in accentuating the lyric and the kitten and cat and meow at the end were very effective.

The mix sounds excellent on our monitors.

Enjoyed the song and vid!

Our best to you and yours during the holidays!
J&B

Hello Ray, Vic, Marc, Scott, Misha, Janice and Bud,

Although I am late with my reaction (some kind of holiday break causing a lot of work...), I won't let you down.
You have all sent me such nice comments on this 'God' song, so many thanks for this!


Ray, during my break, I thought about your 'stops'. I still don't know if longer stops would have increased drama. Also because of the effect in the video...
But I certainly will try it out on another dramatic song and, looking at the state of our earth, such a song will come soon enough. Thanks!


Vic, I think he already is. I just heard a whisper he ain't coming for next Christmas...


Hi Marc, thanks a lot for your documented view on the song and the singer as well as all the compliments!
To start with the last one: No, English isn't my native language, but I liked singing in it. I'm always working on better lyrics, pronoucation and whatever.
In this song, the tiny mistake I am aware of is somewhere in the beginning of the song where I sang 'an' instead of 'a'.
But if I had more odd things in my lyrics, i am happy to here them. That helps me too.
About the pitch in my vocals; I never use pitch correction, although I have a lot of software to correct wrong pitches.
I think the natural sound is nicer, unless it sounds false.

About the instruments and the during of the song:
All instruments are generated, not only in BiaB, but also in Logic or Native Instruments (or alike).
...Ray argued I had to add more stops to increase the drama. That would make the song longer....
In this song I had to tell a story. From the beginning of creating the world to what people did with it.
And I had to be careful not to offend people needlessly. That made this song a bit too long, if 3 minutes is considered long enough.
Thanks again for this comment, Marc!


Scott, thanks for everything, including the 'happy' wish. I used it for my birthday...


Misha, thanks for your nice comment. Yes, of course i knew it could be seen as a 'controversial' song.
On the other hand, if you were the GREAT designer, how would you think of everything?
But thanks a lot for your very nice compliments!


Janice and Bud, there are a lot troubling things happening to a lot of people. Of course you feel more pain or agony when children are involved...
When I made this video, I had that clip of the kitten and I thought it was dying. I had shortened the clip without seeing all of it.
So, when I saw the full clip I was relieved the kitten did not die, but was dragged out of the screen. I decided to keep that part and added that meow on the audiotrack.
And I'm happy you enjoyed that part too!

Thanks everyone and let's enjoy this year!
Hans