Made with "clasrok" Realtracks

https://soundcloud.com/trevorj800/if-i-had-a-car

If I had a car
You would probably know my name
All the kids would say here comes James
When I drove up to the restaurant
If I had a car
You would smile and your eyes would say
Wish you would drive over my way
I’d act so casual and nonchalant

Chorus

But all I have is a bicycle and an aching in my heart
Could you love me without wheels?
Would you care how I feel without a car?

If I had a car
I would drive it up to you place
Rev the motor in your dirveway
And honk the horn in such a fashion that you’d know was me
If I had a car
I’d take you far away to some beach
Over your shoulder I’d reach
To lock the door, I’d keep my arm there and you head would lean

Chorus

If I had a car
I would work in the laundromat
To fix the radiator and buy gas
To take you out when we’re bored and want to be alone
If I had a car
I’d keep blankets for when it’s dark
So we wouldn’t get cold when we park
I’d set the alarm for when your mother wanted you back home

Chorus

Hi Trevor,

I love the energy of this composition. It's action-packed from start to finish! After sitting here and listening, I feel like I've run a marathon.

The music is perfect. I compliment you on your lyrics, too. My impression is that you've put a lot of thought into writing and rewriting these so as to get the best impact from them. I have never come across the rhyme restaurant/nonchalant before. Impressive!

I enjoyed it I'm looking forward to what you come up with next.

All the best,
Noel

Cool tune.

I like that the vocal is setting up nice and clear. The sax solo in the center should be about the same level..... just let it wail....

Trevor,

Great opening. A good write - clever. As Noel noted, nice rhyme..

Good go-after-it vocal. The tracks sound great but are a bit low in comparison to the vocal.

Very enjoyable.

floyd

Hi Trevor,

clever lyrics. Nice performance. Little nits are already mentioned above.
Enjoyable listen.

Guenter

+1, Exactly what I was thinking. I really enjoyed it- like Herb said let that sax wail! Tom

A also agree. A remix would take this very good song over the top IMHO.

Really fun!! I like the raw, exposed, unpretentious emotion. Just cuts right down to the way a lot of us have felt at times. The music works great. I think the music could come up (solo in particular), and some vocal processing (pretty light) might add something. The lyrics are really cool but there are a few places where the phrasing is a bit awkward. Very cool tune!! Take care. Greg

Hi Trevor,
Much has been said. Like the song and can't help hearing Jonathan Richman and his modern lovers. That is a compliment, loved JR and his naive style.
G
F

Great fun song.
Very retro sounding.
Thanks for sharing.

Rob.

Very nice song.
We agree about what is said about the sax and the relationship between vocals and tracks.
Enjoyable.

Rob and Anne-Marie

And another +1 on the above.

We enjoyed it!!

J&B

Hi, Travor !:))


Wow, I really liked this
tune of yours !:))
I´m sure she´ll love
you without the wheels also !:)) (LOL) !!
Enjoyable and very fresh listen !

Cheers
Dani

Enjoyed this from start to finish. Especially good job on getting these clever lyrics.


Charlie

As far as vocal processing, any ideas? I put a bit of reverb on it, as well as a drop of compression and eq (n Realband) but I really don't know much about how to produce vocals. I'd like to learn.

+1 to Greg's comments. Fresh enthusiastic sound. Nice. Cheers.

Thanks for the comments, folks. I have written quite a few songs and I really enjoy recording them with BIAB.

I have a few things that I would welcome feedback on. First, how to improve my vocal recording. My voice is what it is, I can change it a little by practicing but it's what god gave me. Is there any software programs (VST's) that are designed for amateur producers to improve vocals? I know the room is important but I am squeezed there. I live in China, where I teach, and the only place I can record is in my school's rehearsal room, which is what it is (like my voice).

Next, what do folks do around here if they want shop a song around? I know there's Taxi...any other ideas? I think the car song might work on a children's television show or something like that, but how do I get it to the right person?

Welcome to the forum Hopeless Romantic! May I ask what your real name is? I feel goofy referring to you by your screen name. (James maybe, as in the song?)

I have to admit I started listening with the expectation that I probably wouldn't like it. Not sure why, probably just because I don't know you yet.

But about halfway in I started thinking "WOW you've got some good stuff happening here!"

First of all, I love that your whole premise is a hypothetical question. What better theme for a song than "WHAT IF...?" You could have said most of what you said by coming at it from a variety of directions, but I think this was particularly effective.

Then I love that you answered your own question with a variety of hypothetical possibilities, and how they might play out. Everything about this is consistent with a very young and innocently unbridled perspective, and that lets you off the hook from having to make it more refined.

It totally works as an energetic exercise in youthful imagination.

You took some rhyming liberties, but I don't think you went too far given the theme of a high school kid who I might imagine getting Ds in English on his last report card.

Rhymes I liked:
restaurant - nonchalant
alone - home

favorite line:
"And honk the horn in such a fashion that you’d know was me"

Your use of BIAB to accomplish the song is quite good I think. The production became invisible to me as I focused on your lyrics.

The only nit I would point out is your vocal intonation. You asked about software to help that. Depends on how much money you want to spend. GSNAP is a free plugin that pitch corrects pretty well if you're already pretty close

MELODYNE is the best in my opinion, but its expensive.

Somewhere in between is this: AUTO TUNE PLUGIN

All in all, a very impressive early offering. I look forward to hearing more from you!

Much obliged for the feedback and software recommendations. I am a bit off-key because I am out of practice, I think. I am on break now and can sing regularly for the next month or so. If practice doesn't improve my intonation I will try a plug in.

BTW, you can call me Trevor -- or just plain 'Hopeless'. I probably should have thought of a better name when I registered but I just typed the first thing that popped into my head.

Excellent song. Love your lyrics. Could related to your lyrics as a teenager.. Solo could be a bit louder

Trevor,

You said ...



I don't know if you are aware of Coursera but they run courses on many, many subjects including music production, lyric writing, music arranging, etc.

Simply go to ...

https://www.coursera.org

... and type MUSIC in the search box. You'll see most of what's offered.


The courses are FREE!


Berklee College is, perhaps, the worldwide leader in modern songwriting techniques and they offer a number of the courses on Coursera.

It's worth investigating. From what you said, I think you'll find these useful.

Regards,
Noel

Thanks, Noel. I will try this site.