Hi everyone,

Here is my 'contribute' for september. https://soundcloud.com/user-296497130/gonna-be-lonely



This song I made in januari 2018, long before I participated in this forum. I didn't dare to at that time.
I couldn't mix or master, and the song sounded very harsh.
Now I think I have learned more, so dare more.

This song is based on the style Merfolk, the key is C and the tempo is 100.
I added an funky electric guitar and 2690 as an electric sologuitar.
I did the harmony with VoiceLive3 from TC Helicon.

The lyrics are a fantasy. I am exaggerating a bit about relationproblems.
I more liked the melody and the singing.

I hope you like it. Let me know,
Hans

Lyrics:
Gonna be lonely
(c) HwBerkhout, jan. 2018/ 2019

Oh, lonely me

You found out this evening
what happened
between our silky sheets
I had filthy feet

You don't have to ask me
how I know
Your eyes have that piercing, scary light
It better have a lonely night

But it's aching, you never told me
You had secrets of your own, I'd see
Oh, it's gonna be a lonely night
For you and for me

What to do now?
Who's got to go?
Our hands are free
So it ain't me

Before you leave here
I must tell you
Maybe you won't understand
But this was not planned

Oh, it's so cold now
It started raining
The stars don't shine so bright
Ah, it's gonna be a lonely night

I felt sorry, what I have done?
Can we mend what we cannot see?
Ah, it's gonna be a lonely night
For you and me

I admit, about you
I had my doubts too
But don't make that much fuzz
That's really not us

Can't we talk it over
and end like friends?
Maybe there remains one tiny light
Or we gonna have a lonely night

Don't leave tomorrow, stay some more time
Get your love back out of that old tree
Or it's gonna be a lonely night
For you and for me

We have to do some talking
Don't whist anyway
But please let me stay...

Alright, I pack my things
And I go someplace else
I will look for what I won't find
Because you stay on my mind

Oh, let's talk it over
and see what is left
Or did our love really died?
Then there gonna be a lonely night

I leave tomorrow, why should I stay?
We can't go back, and that's so true
Ah, another lonely night
For me and for you
Ah, another lonely night
for me and for you

The writing and arrangement are solid.
I vacillate between enjoying and disliking the vocal effects you've used.
It's one of those things.
As a demo of a cool song it works a treat any way.
The only real quibble would be that in my head I sing
"For you and for me" with the same notes but different phrasing.
You've succeeded in driving me nuts with your song - I enjoyed it too!

Hans,

A cool sounding song. The BAND is cookin'... nicely mixed.

The vocals are nice. During the chorus when there are multiple vocal tracks it gets a bit loud, but they sound cool (perhaps the group could be backed off a bit).

A good listen.

fj

Hans,
I enjoyed your rocking song. I like your vocals- energetic, good phrasing and a bit raspy ( reminds me of John Hiatt). I agree that backing off the chorus harmonies would reduce the harsh edge there.

Robert

Hans,
Looks like you had fun with it! Very catchy tune! Strong vocals. Interesting phrasing and arrangement.

Since, I believe you have strong nerves, here is an opinion. The vocals and arrangement do have different feel to them. I wish there would be more "common" tonal balance between them. You like vocals on HF (I have that issue too ) but arrangement has a more balanced EQ feel, so the vocals to my ear stand out a bit more than comfort level. Still, song is powerful and done very tastefully. I enjoyed it.

Thank you for sharing!

Misha.

We like the vocal effects and the overall sound.

Everything holds together well when cranked up on our monitors.

Robert said: "I reminds me of John Hiatt"

Good point! We have listened to him over the years and there is a similarity...a good thing!

This is a fine rocker that we enjoyed!

J&B

Hi Ray, Floyd, Robert, Misha, Janice and Bud,

I thought it would be some sort of Popsong, not a Rocker. But I think you are more right than I. feels strange, me being a rocker!
Actually I had the BeeGees in mind. Not their high voices but the way they arrange their songs. i can say here (just for us) I was a fan of them and could sing that high, once...
But I like a lot of music/styles. and one of my sons had compared me with John Hiatt. I still have to get used to it, when you come from far (BG's).
And i heard what you said about my group. Back off! I told them to do so, cause Floyd said so, as did Ray, Robert, Misha. Only Janicew and Bud could stand it, because their monitors hold even when cranked up to their max.!
But Ray was teasing me with his post. I had to use google-Translate for nearly every sentence he wrote. The nicest part was I drove him nuts!!! I thought he was doing that to me with his language.

But thanks everyone for giving me tips and instructions.
I made some adjustments and did that backoff request. Maybe it's somewhat better now.

I appreciate it very much,
Hans

Hans,

This is a great rock song... Good song, vocal and mix. I thoroughly enjoyed this one!

Bob

The vocal sounds a little loud at times, but otherwise the song is pretty solid. Really great job!

Excellent tune Hans. Super vocal. Loved the guitar. Well done

Good song, Hans!

I especially like those layered vocals, very effective.

Enjoyed the listen!

Wow - you did a number on this one! The arrangement is excellent and your vocals are stunning. The harmonies on the chorus soar, and I really thought the instrumentation was well blended, personally.

Thanks for sharing

Very catchy chorus, those backing vocals make it really powerful. The solo guitar hides the vocals during verses, maybe you could pan it differently? The selected band works very well with the lyrical message and your strong voice, although I was also thinking how Neil Young and his simple arrangement would work.

Janne

I liked it for the most part. It felt like there was always a guitar, background vocal, or something else competing with the lead vocal. Otherwise, a lot to like here.

Hans

A nice rocking number, with a good sounding band. Some good mixing advice in the posts.

Nice work.

Peter

Hi Bob, Ember, Scott, Dave, Deryk, Jannsan, Tunemonger and Peter,

At first, thanks for listening to the song and secondly the remarks, tips and advises.
I consider this forum to be a place to interact and learn. So never be shy when you judge my songs. But do it with a friendly tone, otherwise I'm of my track for some days. And you all succeeded to do that (that tone).

Bob, Scott and Dave and Deryk, thanks you liked the song. Made me smile for a day now!
Ember, you mentioned those vocals come in a bit too loud. I changed that, because some others said the same and were right. Maybe I was too hasty showing you this song.
That is also the case with the mixing between instruments and vocals as Jannesan, Tunemonger and Peter meant. Tunemonger was using the word 'competing' and I found out he was right. So I remixed the song on those aspects. The electric guitar softer and more to the left, like the sologuitar on certain aspects. And I had to listen where to place the vocals. All the backgroundvocals are now moved to the right. At first I had them spread out left and right for a 'wide' effect.

And I changed the label 'Pop' into 'Rock', although I was convinced this song was not at all a Rocksong...

Hans

Enjoyable listen. The vocals parts with harmony have a very modern pop sound to them.

Hi Hans,

This is a great listen! I love this groove heaps.

Your songwriting is excellent and your song-presentation is confident and very enjoyable to listen to. The arrangement shines. One of many things that really impressed me was how you managed to weave a solo guitar around vocals... that's no mean feet at all. It's something that I've very rarely managed to achieve but, as I listened to this arrangement, you made it sound super easy. You're a talented man.

From start to end, I was with you all the way!

All the best,
Noel

Cool! To me, your vocal delivery reminds me a lot of David Byrne of Talking Heads.

I really like the asymmetrical pattern you use.

This definitely goes in the "enjoyed" category for me!

Great sounding rock ballad!! You really have that Lennon vibe in your vocals, which I love!! Great job on this one!! Take care. Greg

Hi Hans,

you continue to come up with amazing stuff with a very, very personal style and attitude. I'm sure I would, already by now, recognize any song of yours after the first line.

If that ain't an unusual composition (in the positive sense)... A great arrangement / backing track, surprising lyrics ('filthy feet'...), and your vocal is always outstanding. Other folks compared your voice to artists I do not know - I am not reminded on anybody I might know - to me your singing is absolutely unique.

Enjoyed the tune a lot and I'm looking forward what October will bring...

Groetjes,

Stefan

Hi Mark, Noel, David, Greg and Stefan (and everyone else),

I enjoyed your comments, thanks for all of it. They make the day.
It was nice to read that Mark called it a popsound, Greg a Rock-ballad, before others called it a rocksong, I thought a popsong. We have to start a discussion what makes a song Pop, Rock or Soul (I think Jazz, Funk and Blues are well defined yet). But consider this as a little joke, nothing is behind it.

Noel, you mentioned the solo around the singing. I had to think about that, because to me it was nothing special. I feel my music in my head, while composing, try things out and use BB in all those phases. But you (nearly) made me blush. Isend your tekst ending with 'talented man' to my son. He didn't respond yet.

And then David, Greg and Robert (in a former post) heard traces of David Byrne, John Lennon and John Hiatt in my voice. Of course I'm proud of that, but I thought it was Noel earned $4 from Turkey. I got nothing so far. So keep calling me (famous) names, maybe...

Stefan, it's you amazing me with phones that don't ring! Wonderful. My phone for instance is not ringing lots of time. Was that you?
But maybe you don't have to wait till october...

A little disclaimer: If I have offended someone with the things I wrote here, please don't be. I enjoyed your posts and comments, but we in the Netherlands are known for our immediacy and bluntness. We can't help doing so...

Hans

Good rocking tune here...
I really like the way you delivered "there gonna be a lonely night"...
Really catchy...
Of course I always enjoy listening to your songs!

Hans Nice and easy song with a flow to go !.

Enjoyed ..like Crossroads I do not know the artist you have been associated with.

Thanks

p.s. I keep posting comments before I am finished typing ?. just me I think.

Hi Jim and beatmaster,

Thanks for your comments.
Jim, I will say this some more time I'm afraid, but I'm really glad having you back at this forum.
And even more because you listened to my songs and even enjoy that (kidding a bit),
Beatmaster, it's better posting comments before finish typing than afterwards (I think). But it's a pity you finished typing before telling me what artist I'm associated to. Makes me curious...
But thanks for the compliments!

Hans

Thanks Hans...
I trying my best to get caught up & enjoy all the creative songs on this forum...
I really have missed not being here during the last two months...
But I'm feeling better!