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#121342 - 07/15/11 04:58 PM [User Showcase] Tiger On The Run
Ian Fraser Offline
Expert

Registered: 07/02/00
Posts: 1696
Loc: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
This song began life several years ago as a midi file. RTs were just coming out and Russ DeMussell of the Forum offered to add some RTs to the mix at the time. He did a good job and even did his own version. In the last year I decided to change the intro, drop some of the midi voices and add some RTs because I had been fully indoctrinated. Thanks to Mario DeLaura of the Forum for hearing the glitches and helping me balance what my ears couldn’t catch in the new mix.

I think this mix works, but I want to know if any of you listeners think that something isn’t right. Hope you enjoy.

RTs
Banjo RT623
Strumming Bluegrass RT598
Fingerpicking Guitar RT522
Fiddle Soloist RT596
Pedal Steel RT603
MIDI – XG Voices - Kick, Fretless Bass and Picked Bass Blend and Piano Bright Acoustic

Tiger On The Run

Copr Words&Music – Ian Fraser

When she told him that she was leaving in the morning
His eyes lit up like a new day dawning
25 years he'd been living on a prison rock pile.
He couldn't hold back the enthusiasm
His body shook with a giggling spasm
He went for a walk and didn't come back 'til dawn
And she was gone.

The first thing he did was open all the windows,
Aired the house good to get rid of her perfume,
Went to the closet and threw out all that she'd left.
Then away with the sheets of pretty flowers
Bought satin ones made especially for lovers
Traded in the CDs and the good ole stereo
For an i-pod to go.

Now he's a tiger on the run chasing his tail in the mountains,
He's a rabbit on the loose fertilizing and a thumping,
He's an old tom cat with a 25 year yearn
He's a fire that's just starting to burn.

He's living now way down in Alabama
Pickin' and grinnin' singing "Oh! Susanna"
Living a life that suits him to a T,
He only ever wanted to play that country music
Work on his truck and worship on Sunday
But now and then the thoughts come drifting home
Of his time spent alone.

Now he's a tiger on the run chasing his tail in the mountains,
He's a rabbit on the loose fertilizing and a thumping,
He's an old tom cat with a 25-year yearn
He's a fire that's just starting to burn.
Tiger on the run, he's tiger on the run,
Tiger on the run, he's a tiger on the run.

Cheers - Ian
_________________________
Ian
My "Original Tunes" Site
My gene pool needs more chlorine.

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#121343 - 07/19/11 08:46 AM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Ian Fraser]
MarioD Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 10904
Loc: Hamlin NY
You know I like this one! The lyrics are top notch IMHO.

A winner for sure!
_________________________
The only exercise I did this month was run out of money!

64 bit Win 10 Pro - the latest BiaB and RB - Roland Octa-Capture audio interface - a ton of software and some hardware.

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#121344 - 07/19/11 04:00 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Ian Fraser]
PgFantastic Offline
Veteran

Registered: 02/11/05
Posts: 2646
Loc: Kentucky
Nice work. Excellent production. Thanks for sharing!
_________________________
My Tunes

Psalm 57:7 My heart, O God, is steadfast, my heart is steadfast; I will sing and make music.

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#121345 - 07/21/11 07:57 AM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: PgFantastic]
Noel96 Offline
Veteran

Registered: 10/31/08
Posts: 13099
Loc: Australia
Hi Ian,

I just realized that I haven't yet comment on this song. I thought I had because I listened to the music a little while back. Old age, I guess!

There's an awful lot to like about this song You're lyrics won me! I was captivated by your fresh and vivid imagery. Very very inventive lines in here. You're a fine wordsmith! My one suggestion would be to see if changing "starting" in the last line of the chorus to "wanting" or "waiting" makes the song stronger. The reason I suggest this is because for me, the song went from "yippee I'm free!", in the early verses, to "being free is not all it's cracked up to be", in the final verse. To my mind, "waiting" (or "wanting") can take shades of meaning from "it's about to happen" to "I'm really hoping it's going to happen". In this way, the chorus would serve all three verses and this simple word change might make the song stronger. Then again, it might not! Just a thought It's just that I found myself wondering if "starting" is as versatile in meaning as, say, "waiting" so I'm passing it on for what it's worth.

By the way, I love the twist at the end. Also, the emotion of this song is beautifully supported by 7-line verses (which throw one a little bit of kilter and thus enhance the feeling of "not quite so happy after all"). And then you discreetly use some non-perfect rhymes that further enhance this emotion. In my opinion, this is top notch songwriting! It's a great song, Ian.

All the best,
Noel
_________________________
LINKS TO MY BIAB/RB SONGS


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#121346 - 07/21/11 12:33 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Noel96]
Tommyc Offline
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Registered: 01/08/11
Posts: 2606
Aw the link was not working for me

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#121347 - 07/21/11 04:57 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run - WebLink Down - Sorry [Re: Tommyc]
Ian Fraser Offline
Expert

Registered: 07/02/00
Posts: 1696
Loc: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Please note at 5 pm EDT, my web page provider is DOWN.
This has been the case since this morning.

Sorry - y'all come back now - hear!

Ian
_________________________
Ian
My "Original Tunes" Site
My gene pool needs more chlorine.

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#121348 - 07/22/11 04:03 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run - WebLink Down - Sorry [Re: Ian Fraser]
Ian Fraser Offline
Expert

Registered: 07/02/00
Posts: 1696
Loc: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
As of today, Friday July 22 at 4 EDT my ISP's web hosting server is now operating, so the Tiger on the Run link is operative.

So Tommy - give it another try and let me know how you make out.

Robert - thanks for your kind comment - and good luck on the 50/90.

Ian
_________________________
Ian
My "Original Tunes" Site
My gene pool needs more chlorine.

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#121349 - 07/23/11 06:32 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run - WebLink Down - Sorry [Re: Ian Fraser]
Tommyc Offline
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Registered: 01/08/11
Posts: 2606
Still not working for me Ian :r(

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#121350 - 07/23/11 07:21 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run - WebLink Down - Sorry [Re: Tommyc]
MarioD Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 10904
Loc: Hamlin NY
Quote:

Still not working for me Ian :r(




That’s weird. I just checked and it worked for me. I’m using IE8. What are you using?
_________________________
The only exercise I did this month was run out of money!

64 bit Win 10 Pro - the latest BiaB and RB - Roland Octa-Capture audio interface - a ton of software and some hardware.

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#121351 - 07/24/11 03:51 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run - WebLink Down - Sorry [Re: MarioD]
Steve Young Offline
Expert

Registered: 06/17/10
Posts: 1625
Loc: Canyon Lake, TX
Ian,

Very nice work here! You do have a way with words. Like Noel, I thought I had already commented on this song. I didn't realize I was as old as Noel! (Actually, I'm sure I'm probably older.)

As to your link not working, I had a hard time getting it to play in Firefox, so I went to IE, and it played just fine. So Tommy, you might try it in IE.

Keep up the good work, Ian!

Steve
_________________________
Steve Young
Music
"In order to compose, all you need to do is remember a tune that nobody else has thought of." - Robert Schumann

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#121352 - 07/25/11 09:23 AM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Noel96]
Ian Fraser Offline
Expert

Registered: 07/02/00
Posts: 1696
Loc: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Hi Noel

You had heard this song two years ago but it needed to be refurbished.

This song went through changes structurally when I decided to cut some time from it to make it more in-line with Nashville structure when I became a member of Taxi. There was initially a chorus after verse 1 which made "starting" more apropos, verse 2 and chorus also had the "yippee I'm free" feel. By verse 3 and chorus 3 (now 2) there's been a big passage in time , but he's caught remembering the "good times" back when he was "yippee I'm free".

Singing-wise, I prefer the way that "starting" can be punched up, spit out and played with vocally. What you say is valid but maybe there needs to be a better tie lyrically between Verse 3 and what is now chorus 2.
I respect your opinion - thanks for passing that on, Noel.

I was surprised that nobody's singled out "giggling spasm" yet. Thank you for the comments about my writing - I find I often push limits trying to say something differently. You do very well.


Cheers - Ian
_________________________
Ian
My "Original Tunes" Site
My gene pool needs more chlorine.

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#121353 - 07/25/11 02:22 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Ian Fraser]
GHinCH Offline
Expert

Registered: 01/08/10
Posts: 1486
Loc: Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Google Chrome says "missing plugin". Which one do I need?

Guido
_________________________
Desktop; i7-2600k, 8 GB mem., Win 10 Pro, BIAB 2017; RB 2017 - latest build
Laptop: i5-2410M, 4 GB mem, Win 10 Pro, BIAB 2017; RB 2017 - latest build

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#121354 - 07/25/11 02:29 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: GHinCH]
Ian Fraser Offline
Expert

Registered: 07/02/00
Posts: 1696
Loc: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Hi

The file is a wma that starts from an html page - I'm not sure what the add-on name is. I'm not familiar with using Google Chrome - must give it a try.

I would think that with Windows on your computer, that you would have Windows Media Player.

Hope that helps.

Ian
_________________________
Ian
My "Original Tunes" Site
My gene pool needs more chlorine.

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#121355 - 07/25/11 02:41 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Ian Fraser]
GHinCH Offline
Expert

Registered: 01/08/10
Posts: 1486
Loc: Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Thanks Ian,

I'll try it with Internet Explorer. I just don't like the new version, that's why I use Google Chrome. I'll let you know.

Guido
_________________________
Desktop; i7-2600k, 8 GB mem., Win 10 Pro, BIAB 2017; RB 2017 - latest build
Laptop: i5-2410M, 4 GB mem, Win 10 Pro, BIAB 2017; RB 2017 - latest build

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#121356 - 07/25/11 02:56 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: GHinCH]
GHinCH Offline
Expert

Registered: 01/08/10
Posts: 1486
Loc: Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Cool song, (It worked with Internet Explorer.) I like it.

Guido
_________________________
Desktop; i7-2600k, 8 GB mem., Win 10 Pro, BIAB 2017; RB 2017 - latest build
Laptop: i5-2410M, 4 GB mem, Win 10 Pro, BIAB 2017; RB 2017 - latest build

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#121357 - 07/25/11 05:42 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: GHinCH]
Ian Fraser Offline
Expert

Registered: 07/02/00
Posts: 1696
Loc: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Guido - Glad it worked for you. Thanks for taking the time to listen.

Ian
_________________________
Ian
My "Original Tunes" Site
My gene pool needs more chlorine.

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#121358 - 07/26/11 06:51 AM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Ian Fraser]
Mr_Songman Offline
Apprentice

Registered: 08/16/10
Posts: 114
Loc: Surrey,England
Hi Ian,

Song has a great feel, but it seems to get a little lost lyrically because of the Rhyming Scheme - or rather the lack of one.

The first verse seems to establish the Rhyming Scheme as an AABCCDD or thereabouts as you rhyme first and second lines - "Morning" and "Dawning" and fourth and fifth lines - "Enthusiasm" and "Spasm"

Unfortunately, you lose it completely in the second verse where you have "Windows" and "Perfume" and then "Flowers" and "Lovers" on those lines.

By the third verse you have a rhyme back on the first two lines with "Alabama" and "Susanna", and none at all with "Music" and "Sunday"

The DD Rhymes on the last two lines you've held throughout the song.

This, for me, causes the lyric to stagger rather than flow. Ideally,and usually, the first verse of a song should establish the Rhyming Scheme of a song which should then be followed throughout. There are exceptions to this obviously, but it is the norm.

I've taken the liberty of adding a couple of links below which address the subject of Rhyme Schemes for you're perusal should you be interested.

http://www.musiclyricsfyi.com/rhyme-in-lyrics.html

http://www.songwriting-guide.com/rhyme-scheme.html

I'm always loathe to critique a fellow songwriters work, but I just feel this could be really good with a little re write here and there. Only my opinion however so feel free to ignore me.

All the best

Martin
_________________________
Music is what feelings sound like.

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#121359 - 07/26/11 12:40 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Mr_Songman]
Ian Fraser Offline
Expert

Registered: 07/02/00
Posts: 1696
Loc: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Hi Martin

Thanks for weighing in on this and you make valid points about lyric rhyme - I read the links as well.
I think this whole subject of rhyme would be well-suited for the Off-Topic Forum because there are different ideas on how to construct song lyrics.

My belief has always been that I don't sacrifice my story in an effort to find an exact rhyme.
A good tight, simple rhyme does help your listener remember the lyrics but then again it also
tends to keep song concepts pretty simple . . . or steers you story for the sake of the rhyme.

I use a lot of near-rhymes in the search for story ideas, or holding to story ideas. In fact I have a song that I posted here titled Should You Find Me and is on my webpage, that was mostly blank verse - amazing to me but that's the way the song came out.

Ultimately, lyric construction is what we feel comfortable with individually - mind you we can also get too close to the song, so it never hurts to have a closer look. And you've given me reason to have a second look, and for that I thank you for the input. I think the current lyric structure works here, but probably wouldn't work with another type of song.
http://www.irenejackson.com/rhyme.html
This is a very interesting link about rhyme and near-rhyme - which is very valid.

Cheers and success - Ian
_________________________
Ian
My "Original Tunes" Site
My gene pool needs more chlorine.

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#121360 - 07/26/11 01:28 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Ian Fraser]
Tommyc Offline
Veteran

Registered: 01/08/11
Posts: 2606
I finally got to hear it Ian ,mixing sounds good and I just love your band ! I'm glad you only wrote those "g's" ( cuz the g at the end of words is sighlint )in your lyrics instead of sangin them . Good job Ian !

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#121361 - 07/26/11 01:47 PM [User Showcase] Re: Tiger On The Run [Re: Tommyc]
Ian Fraser Offline
Expert

Registered: 07/02/00
Posts: 1696
Loc: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Hey Tommy glad you got to listen to the letters that weren't missin'.

Are you delivering me a subtle/not so subtle message that I ought to improve my diction, or drop in a few apostrophes in place of the missing "g"s????

Let's chalk it up to singin'/lack of singin' style.

Cheers Tom
Ian
_________________________
Ian
My "Original Tunes" Site
My gene pool needs more chlorine.

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