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tommyad #470898 05/02/18 04:20 PM
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TommyAD you were absolutely right about the bass. It was way the hell to the left. Back closer to center now.

Fixed the "oo-oh" and pulled the rhythm guitar back so it doesn't start right away, let the two noodling guitars start it off cold with no other instruments.

I'm callin' it done

Phil Leith #470924 05/02/18 10:32 PM
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Very eagles sounding. The chorus took me back to the mid seventies. The is very well constructed and easy to listen to. Great mellow stuff. Thanks for listing Rob

Last edited by Rob4580; 05/02/18 10:33 PM.
Phil Leith #470959 05/03/18 03:49 AM
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<<< "I'm still trying to get used to people complimenting my voice." >>>

Get used to people complimenting your voice. It was the star of the song. You have a wonderful voice. But along with the great vocals you've also written some quality lyrics, did a nice arrangement and mix and turned out a first rate production to my ears.

This is a good singer/songwriter piece and I agree you're in the wheelhouse of the 70's but the energy of your song felt the closest to Jim Croce to me from the bouncy energy of the music. Change the instrumentation and style to move the song back 10 years earlier, with jangly guitars, heavy bass and vocals drowned in reverb, it would fit the Hollies.

<<< "I'm callin' it done" >>> That's ok for this mix but I'm not so sure I'd recommend you be through with the song itself. To me, this song 'fits' into a lot of places and that's a sign of what I view as a quality write. It seems the song holds more than is being let out. I really like your song and think you've got more than maybe you think you have...

Enjoyed my listen and I look forward to hearing more of your songs. I'm impressed.


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Phil Leith #471022 05/03/18 09:32 AM
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Nice work! As others have (correctly) said, you've got a nice voice. That Jimmy Buffet inflection comes through strong, which is good.

I had to turn the volume up on the mix to get it sounding where I wanted it. That's unusual with a lot of mixes - usually I need to turn things down. Clearly you aren't listening to enough contemporary music. wink

Bob was right about the fills - they keep the energy going between the verses. I also like to slide instruments in and out of fades, and whatever you did here was smooth, as I was never distracted. Envelopes in Reaper are indeed your friend.

Speaking of Reaper, you might want to have a look at stretch markers. Not that anything in this song made me think that it needs editing with timing, but it's one of those "I wish I knew there was a super easy way to do this" kind of thing.

The Aaaahs help give the chorus a nice punch. They sound great to me.

Sounds a bit like a theme song to a 70's television show - and I also mean that in a good way.

You didn't ask for extensive feedback, so sorry if this is a bit much. The short version is that I enjoyed the song, thanks! smile


-- David Cuny
My virtual singer development blog

Vocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?
dcuny #471106 05/03/18 02:44 PM
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It's not too extensive feed back. I'm all ears.

And thank you.

Yes, the "70's TV Show Theme" popped into my head listening to it. I have a buddy that says EVERY James Taylor song sounds like a 70's TV Theme Show. He's not entirely wrong. And yeah, I don't consider it a bad thing. It's not what I was going for, but it's not NOT what I was going for, either. I get an idea, I know how I want it to sound, and I just ... aim at that and it sounds like whatever it sounds like. I like so much and so many different styles of music, it's just music to me. If it's got a decent melody, proper tempo for the mood, and if it's got lyrics, decent lyrics ... I am not that concerned with what style it sounds like.

You can tell I am a huge harmony fan. I've always loved it. I started using it to mask my voice ... and I've never studied music beyond listening to a crap-ton of it. Somehow one day harmony lines just started coming to me.

I really have no idea what I'm doing with it. Just singing what I think sounds good. Doesn't come out right the first or even fourth time a lot of times, but I get it.

Charlie Fogle #471118 05/03/18 03:45 PM
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Thank you, Charlie. I am seriously humbled by the vocal praise. I should shut up about it ... it's just that hard for me to buy into. I'm coming around. I think I have found my voice ... finally ... I guess I just need to learn to be happy with it.

"<<< "I'm callin' it done" >>> That's ok for this mix but I'm not so sure I'd recommend you be through with the song itself."

Funny you should say that. Bob was listening to the mix after I said it was "done" and didn't quite get the added BIAB oohs and aaahs leading into the chorus. This was something I wanted to try. The chorus background vocals I'm actually singing "I'm A-liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive". It sounds exactly the way it did in my dream. But that leadup TO the chorus, I thought I needed to build some energy so that's why I thought "hey, I'll try the new BIAB Ooohs and Aaaaahs".

They sounded very mechanical. One reason I left them so low in the mix. The other reason is, they need to be subtle. I almost don't want you to consciously notice them.

He couldn't even tell what they were. And in his defense, they were harsh, mechanical and ... sounded like a bad synth.

Still, I wanted that in there.

SO tonight I went back and tried recording my own "oooh-aaaah" tracks for that buildup, and I failed miserably.

So I went back to BIAB and did it again. I'm not sure what I did different, but they sound a lot better. I fiddled with them in the mix, they're there, still, but they sound better. Still subtle, like they need to be for the effect I want.

All that is a long way of saying, I guess I wasn't done after all.

"I really like your song and think you've got more than maybe you think you have... "

Oh, I love the song and I think if it got to the right ears it might be a hit for somebody. I mean, even I think it's that good - I am stunned how well it turned out and I'm afraid I've set quite a high bar for myself now :-)

But I'm also realistic. There are a LOT of VERY talented people out there who nobody will ever hear of. People much more talented than I am. If this gets out, it'll be luck. I know that.

I do this because I enjoy it. I'm not trying to become famous and I certainly don't have any illusions of making money in this industry.

That being said I want to do the best work I can and I have much to learn.

Anyway, uploading the new mix with the better BIAB oooh-ahhhs leading up to the choruses. Listen carefully!

Done!

Rob4580 #471119 05/03/18 03:46 PM
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Thank you!

Not surprising, considering my age and my influences. That's the music I love.

Phil Leith #471260 05/04/18 06:53 PM
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<< "SO tonight I went back and tried recording my own "oooh-aaaah" tracks for that buildup, and I failed miserably." >>

Forum member Joanne Cooper writes a blog for beginners using BIAB/RB as well as offer a wonderful, thorough online course for writing a song in RB. It's inexpensive but very well worth the cost.
She has a Facebook Group for interaction between students and I highly recommend it.

One of her blogs details how she creates her wonderful sounding BGV's and harmonies and you may find her method useful.


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Phil Leith #471760 05/08/18 04:13 AM
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Phil,

I really loved this. Great production. The Dire guitar was a nice touch.

Super lyrics, and good vocals.

Interestingly, I wrote a song by the same title last year. If you send me a PM and are interested I will see if I can dig it up and send it to you and you can see two completely different approaches to the same subject if you are interested.

Great song.

David Snyder #472072 05/09/18 07:52 AM
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Very interesting @Dave ... the songs do share the same general theme, too. We all go through stuff in life ... maybe not the same things, but it's a struggle, and the fight to live to see its worth is real ... and may actually even be what life is all about.

This particular song just started out with that line "I'm Alive, I'm Alive and .... blah blah blah blah" didn't even really have lyrics there after the "I'm Alive" part. I woke up from a dream where I heard that bit, with melody and harmony and the whole bit. But that's all I had. Messed around with chords related to what I'd heard in the dream. Changed them up a bit for the verses. Still no words.

Started thinking about my life, and I got the line "Life hasn't always been such a comfortable road" and everything just flowed from that, actually pretty quickly. The basic song was born. Only there were a lot of changes and edits to make it work, especially when I finally got a mic out and tried to sing it.

I've thought about sitting down and writing an article about how this song came about and the process I went through because it is interesting (to me, anyway) and probably reflects how songwriting goes for most people.

Matter of fact, I think I'll do that.

What I find particularly satisfying about this song, though, is that the chorus sounds exactly the way it sounded in my dream.

Last edited by Phil Leith; 05/09/18 07:55 AM.
Charlie Fogle #472074 05/09/18 07:54 AM
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@Charlie I have heard of this Joanne, and even seen some of her YouTube videos. So she uses RB to do backing vocals?

Hmmmmm....

Phil Leith #472076 05/09/18 07:55 AM
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@Dave you might be happy to know that I've occasionally sat and played and sang "Jesus Plays the Guitar" in my living room.

"I said come upstairs my friend, and I will show you where they are!"

Phil Leith #472217 05/09/18 11:57 PM
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Phil,

This is my new favorite of yours! You did a fabulous job in all aspects of this tune! The vocal work is very nice! Thanks, Torrey




Torrey Bliss #472350 05/10/18 04:15 PM
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Thanks, Torrey. Means a lot coming from you. You do excellent work.

Plus ... you're a fellow Missourian :-)

I like it a lot myself. I'm kind of amazed it came out of me. Under a week from initial concept to pretty much finished product. I'm afraid I may have inadvertently set a rather high bar for myself.

On the other hand... let's see what I can do!

Phil Leith #472400 05/11/18 04:24 AM
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Very well done! You definitely captured that summery essence perfectly. Some really nice lyricism, and catchy melodies too. I loved the harmonies on the chorus. The whole thing is definitely a solid road trip tune.

You should be proud of this one - thanks for sharing!


Cheers,
Deryk
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