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#473316 05/17/18 10:34 PM
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Hi All

Here is my latest release on Musicoin. This version was mixed by Ogi Feel the Beat who does a lot of mixing of my songs for submission to Songtradr etc and I know on the previous song I posted some commented the mix was not to their taste so I would love to hear what you think of this one.

ONE PIECE

The song was a co-write with John Scunziano during FAWM this year but I never got round to posting the original mix.

Lyrics:
You took a piece...
And passed it around
You left a fragment...
On the ground

He's only pieces...
He is not whole
You took a piece...
And left him cold

What is a man...
If he's not whole
He's just a footnote...
In somebodys tome
He's not the whole man...
He was before...
He lost a piece...
When you closed the door

Solo

You took a part...
Of what he could be
A little fragment...
And now he bleeds

He's just a half-note...
In somebody's song
When you're half a man...
Where do you belong

What is a man...
If he's not whole
He's just a footnote...
In someone's tome
He's not the whole man...
He was before...
He lost a piece...
When you closed the door

Realtracks:
Bass: 1036
Drums: Nashville Brushes
Guitar: 897 and 702
Mando:1601


Last edited by JoanneCooper; 05/17/18 10:38 PM.

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JoanneCooper #473332 05/18/18 02:17 AM
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Drats - I was 10 minutes into a comment when the page crashed.
Lovely voice that is Judy Collins or Judith Sill like.
Lovely song.
The almost mono mix stacks up a lot of bass from the guitar, bass & bass drum in the middle of the image and they blur into each other.
Double tracking and hard panning L - R the acoustic, or using an ADT plug, until the mandolin comes in to then balance against just one guitar would open things up. Pulling the 2nd vocal 20 points or so away from the main would lessen the trampling it does - it also needs a high pass on it.
ALL of the components are great and a proper mono mix would be fabulous as well but it would take some serious EQ carving etc to sit everything on top of each other.
You've done terrific work writing & performing but the mix doesn't do it justice according to my ears.
I'm probably entirely wrong & my tinnitus is stepping on everything so please ignore me if I'm not even slightly right.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
JoanneCooper #473333 05/18/18 02:44 AM
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Yep... I got the Judy Collins vibe as well. Nice song and good choice of tracks.

regarding the mix....

Maybe Ogi needs to feel the beat a little bit less. I started listening on my computer speakers..Altec Lansings. I had to stop listening because the low end was so overpowering it was distorting the music. I didn't see a volume control on the site. Turning it down might have helped but, this is the normal volume I use for listening to all the music I preview on this computer.

The vox was buried too far into the mix so listening to the lyrics was a challenge. Vox in this should be upfront and setting easily on top of the mix, not down in it.

I switched to my phone and my studio cans to listen. The cans handled the overpowering lows much better but for the genre and style of the song, they were still much too strong. It kinda sounds like this folk song was mixed the same way Ogi would feel the beat on some dubstep.

All that said.... yeah, it's a good song. Loved the harmonies in the chorus. A remix to fix the issues would be an excellent idea.

Curious if others hear the same issues in this mix.

EDIT: went back and read RayC's comments after I listened blind. Yep... what he said too. Just having two acoustic guitars recorded uniquely and panned wide would widen it out nicely. Bring mando UP in the solo a bit more.

Last edited by Guitarhacker; 05/18/18 02:51 AM.

You can find my music at:
www.herbhartley.com
Add nothing that adds nothing to the music.
You can make excuses or you can make progress but not both.

The magic you are looking for is in the work you are avoiding.
JoanneCooper #473336 05/18/18 03:02 AM
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Ray and Herb

Thank you so much! I appreciate the listen the detailed comments on the mix. Never stop learning thanks to the wonderful folk on this forum!

Here for reference is my mix that I did for FAWM. Probably vocal too far forward on this one.

ONE PIECE - My Original mix

If anybody would like a stab at mixing this one all the tracks are already on dropbox... just download and go for it...

https://www.dropbox.com/sh/kpxgnsfu6rg1c40/AAARiZCnEzOlFzut4JGJDfiCa?dl=0


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Play-along with songs you know and love, download SGU files
https://playiit.com/
JoanneCooper #473337 05/18/18 03:05 AM
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I actually like your mix better.... between the two.

I might just grab those tracks and give it a shot..... if for no other reason than, it will be fun.

I see 10 tracks. Is that correct?

Last edited by Guitarhacker; 05/18/18 03:06 AM.

You can find my music at:
www.herbhartley.com
Add nothing that adds nothing to the music.
You can make excuses or you can make progress but not both.

The magic you are looking for is in the work you are avoiding.
JoanneCooper #473340 05/18/18 03:17 AM
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Wow - what a tune, Joanne smile Your vocals are stunning here. Very emotional and sincere sounding, and you hit every note perfectly and seemingly effortlessly. And as others have said - I too think your mix on it is a little better. Not to say the other one isn't good, of course.

You did a great job here - thanks so much for sharing!


Cheers,
Deryk
Guitarhacker #473353 05/18/18 04:13 AM
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Originally Posted By: Guitarhacker
I actually like your mix better.... between the two.

I might just grab those tracks and give it a shot..... if for no other reason than, it will be fun.

I see 10 tracks. Is that correct?


Yes that is right Herb. Go for it.Cant wait to hear


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JoanneCooper #473374 05/18/18 05:21 AM
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Love the song Joanne, I enjoy the mix, I am not a master at mixing myself, so , this is probably much better that I could do. Great song!!

JoanneCooper #473474 05/18/18 12:53 PM
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Joanne,
your mix is streets ahead of the other. I'll download & have a play about - can't say I'll do better but will have a go.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
JoanneCooper #473484 05/18/18 02:43 PM
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You are a very accomplished song writer Joanne. Always enjoy your work.
Bye the way hows is musicoin working out?

JoanneCooper #473486 05/18/18 02:45 PM
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For this intimate style song, I like your mix better. Nice write well sung.

JoanneCooper #473499 05/18/18 05:48 PM
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Joanne,
here's a mix for you. I was going to keep it minimal but since you provided ten tracks I used them all. I should probably have pulled the guitars in a little closer to centre but I had mentioned wide panning so went with that - easy enough to amend. If there's something you'd like altered just let me know
If
Listening to your vocal track reinforced what a lovely voice and melody this song is built on.
One Piece rc mix

Last edited by rayc; 05/18/18 06:19 PM.

Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
rayc #473523 05/19/18 12:20 AM
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Thanks to Deryk, Clifton, Rob and Josie for the listen and the nice comments

Rob, Musicoin is going "okay" they are busy upgrading their website right now so there are a few (a few more than normal!) hiccups but I will persevere. There is always the risk that people dont listen to your music because they have had a bad experience in the past. I know Bud is unable to play the songs from his setup. The market value of the actual crypto-currency you earn does seem to fluctuate wildly but I am just leaving my "coins" there.. who knows maybe I will be writing my next FAWM songs from my yacht in the Seychelles..or maybe not smile

Originally Posted By: rayc
Joanne,
here's a mix for you. I was going to keep it minimal but since you provided ten tracks I used them all. I should probably have pulled the guitars in a little closer to centre but I had mentioned wide panning so went with that - easy enough to amend. If there's something you'd like altered just let me know
If
Listening to your vocal track reinforced what a lovely voice and melody this song is built on.
One Piece rc mix


Hi Ray

Thank you so much for doing this I appreciate it.

Just listening to all three mixes back to back.I think your mix really brings out the vocal very well and your mix is very clear with good separation between the instruments. I didn't notice anything amiss with the guitars. Thank you also for the compliments about the vocal and the melody. As you probably know during FAWM you generally just rush through the songs. I was lucky to be given such a great lyric by John that the music just wrote itself.

In my mix the vocal is definitely too far forward and the whole mix is muddied by the bass. I think Ogi definitely tries to make the mix as (dare I say it?) "modern" as he can. Interesting experiment..I think we may also have a mix from Herb on the way...

Can you send it to me joanne at joannecooper.co.za?


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JoanneCooper #473529 05/19/18 01:22 AM
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Originally Posted By: JoanneCooper

Can you send it to me joanne at joannecooper.co.za?

I'll upload the .wav to Dropbox then send you the link.
It'll take a while as internet in Australia is slow and internet in my village is far, far slower that the national speed.
If you do decide you want the mix tweaked I'll keep the project and files for a few months & you can contact me if needed to do so.
It was an easy as well as fun song to mix - the only thing that gave me pause was a way of dealing with the harmonies but that was due to an embarrassment of riches.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
JoanneCooper #473599 05/19/18 12:56 PM
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Joanne,

Gorgeous song, beautifully expressed by your vocals and harmonies.
I listened to all three mixes and like the space RayC
makes for your vocals ( which sound to my ears more natural in this & your FAWM version than the Musicoin one).
I also liked the panned l/r guitars on the RayC mix... though it seemed a bit odd to switch from the centred guitar intro.

Robert

rayc #473607 05/19/18 03:37 PM
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Originally Posted By: rayc
Joanne,
your mix is streets ahead of the other. I'll download & have a play about - can't say I'll do better but will have a go.


Joanne,

Your singing is excellent, really excellent, and I was captivated by the melody that you've woven against the arrangement. In addition to this, your harmonies sound very polished and you've chosen instruments that showcase everything really well.

Because you asked for an opinion....

I agree with Ray and Herb. To my ears, your mix and Ray's mix both have a great deal more clarity than Ogi's and they make the musical components sparkle just a little more.

As Herb has already mentioned, there is some low frequency dissonance occurring between the bass and the acoustic guitars at various times (most notably at the start of the intro). Have you tried using a hi-pass filter on an EQ for the acoustic so that its bass notes are reduced? I'd try a roll-off around 120 - 150 Hz. (I like that Ray removed the bass early on in his mix. It worked well.)

All said and done, though, I enjoyed my listen a lot. You and John have written a fine song.

All the best,
Noel


MY SONGS...
Audiophile BIAB 2024
JoanneCooper #473613 05/19/18 03:43 PM
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This is nicely done, Joanne. Really liked the production on this piece; great solo section. And of course, impressive vocals and harmonies. Very easy on the ear. Good luck with this one.

All the best,

Deej

JoanneCooper #473630 05/19/18 07:49 PM
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I was working on something else this arvo and needed to give my ears a break from its density so pulled up your song again Joanne. Here're the same basic mix but with narrower panning of the acoustics (80% L & R rather than 100%)
Narrower
and a completely mono mix
MONO
just so you can hear the difference and to demonstrate that mixing, initially, in mono can assist in making things clearer and make it obvious when things are stomping on each other prior to panning.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
JoanneCooper #473634 05/19/18 08:43 PM
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Hello, Joanne

Your singing is excellent!
Beautiful song!
The second chord (C#) is my favorite.
The chord progression from A to C# is very pleasant.
As Musicoin did not work well in my main computer environment (Mac OS 10.11), I listened to it on Chrome of my laptop computer.(Windows 7)
Again, Your singing is excellent!
Enjoyed my listen a lot.

Best regards.

Shigeki Adachi

JoanneCooper #473686 05/20/18 08:05 AM
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Joanne,

Beautiful folk sound. Love the song, vocal and mix.

Bob

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