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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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OP
Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
I'm almost there with this one but please feel free to criticise it in a constructive way so I can learn. I'm never "done" with my songs! I woke up with the first line of verse 1 this month. Been working on it ever since. Let me know what you think. Thanks. CLICK HERE
Last edited by Paul Haynes; 07/27/18 07:51 AM.
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Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,520
Expert
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Expert
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,520 |
Hey Paul, you need to fix the link...didn't connect to anything!
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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OP
Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
Hey Paul, you need to fix the link...didn't connect to anything! Ah. its was set to private. Fixed now. Thanks.
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Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 6,892
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Veteran
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 6,892 |
Very interesting song!! It is a VERY unusual and extended metaphor. Clever and catchy. Melody and vocals are very good as is the mix. Enjoyed!! Take care. Greg
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 20,781
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Joined: Dec 2003
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Yes this is a very clever and catchy! Also it is very well mixed. Your vocal is very good.
AFAIAC this is finished.
Excellent work.
Me, it's not about how many times you fail, it's about how many times you get back up.
Cop, that's not how field sobriety tests work.
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 7,554
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Veteran
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 7,554 |
Really like the back track on this song. Excellent vocal. Well done
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Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 112
Apprentice
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Apprentice
Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 112 |
I agree... Excellent. Very nice song.
------------------------------------------ My music: https://soundcloud.com/ermar-gamarMy stuff: Stratocaster '89, PRS SE Santana, Digitech RP90 Multi Effect, Vocalist Live 3, Digital Piano Korg SP, Studio One 3.5, Presonus Audiobox, BB 2018
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Joined: Sep 2010
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Joined: Sep 2010
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Pleasant, jaunty song. Well sung, nice voice, good mix. From a technical point of view, my only advice would be to keep doing what you're doing. From a songsmith perspective, I'm not really a fan of songs that come right out and tell people to do something. But this didn't irritate me as much usual, so you're doing something right there, too. 
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
Thanks guys. Much appreciated.
I wrote this song aimed at myself.
On a technical note, I think this is one of the better songs I've written/recorded/mixed but I know its not perfect. I tried to add some percussion using EZdrummer2 but couldn't find the right timing so I left it out.
Last edited by Paul Haynes; 07/28/18 05:08 AM.
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Joined: May 2017
Posts: 1,682
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Expert
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 1,682 |
Nice song, to me it sounds like the start of a tv show.
Good clean recording/mix.
Would have liked to have seen the instruments used etc.
win 10 64 bit 16gb,i7 chip, ssd 500gb, m-audio air, ,Roland BK-7M, 1000,shure sm7b,sonar,acid,mixcraft, variety of plugins.Sample tank 3,Kontakt. TC Helicon Voicelive 3 2 . https://beatmaster1.bandcamp.com/releases
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Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
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...Would have liked to have seen the instruments used etc. Hi Beatmaster Sorry for delay. My mix was made up of... Roadrun.sty (Road Run Funky Acoustic Blues) Realtracks My Takamine guitar My vocals Mixed in Studio One
Last edited by Paul Haynes; 07/31/18 04:07 AM.
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Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 3,414
PG Music Staff
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PG Music Staff
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 3,414 |
Really nice work Paul  A really interesting metaphor, as others have mentioned. The mix job sounds really professional, and I enjoyed your vocal delivery a lot too. Keep up the great work, and thanks for sharing!
Cheers,
Deryk
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Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,113
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Joined: Nov 2007
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Good song! Nice mix too, just the right amount of processing on your (very fine!) vocal.
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Joined: Aug 2017
Posts: 547
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Aug 2017
Posts: 547 |
LOL very creative. Great advice in a bit of an unconventional form. Your vocals sound great. Nice choice of tracks. Well done.
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Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 10,122
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Paul,
I like the sound you developed. The song has good balance and dynamics as far as I'm concerned. You vocal blends in with the rest of the song.
I like the lyrics.
My ONLY complaint is you do not have download enabled. This one's a keeper as far as I'm concerned.
Jim Fogle - 2024 BiaB (1111) RB (5) Ultra+ PAK DAWs: Cakewalk by BandLab (CbB) - Standalone: Zoom MRS-8 Laptop: i3 Win 10, 8GB ram 500GB HDD Desktop: i7 Win 11, 12GB ram 256GB SSD, 4 TB HDD Music at: https://fogle622.wix.com/fogle622-audio-home
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Very nice, Paul! The acoustic backing tracks are perfect for this. Your voice is really smooth clear. Nice mix. I really enjoyed this. Best to you.
Alan
BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*16GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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OP
Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
Paul,
I like the sound you developed. The song has good balance and dynamics as far as I'm concerned. You vocal blends in with the rest of the song.
I like the lyrics.
My ONLY complaint is you do not have download enabled. This one's a keeper as far as I'm concerned. Thanks Jim. I didn't know you could do that. I've now enabled downloads and you are free to use it. Thanks for your encouragement.
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
Apologies that I've not thanked everyone personally. You've all been encouraging as usual and I appreciate that but please don't be afraid to criticize my work if you feel you would like to, I can learn better that way of things I've not thought about or stuff I need to be aware of to make it better. I'm never settled with my work, always wanting that "studio" rather than a home made sound.
Last edited by Paul Haynes; 08/04/18 05:49 AM.
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I wrote this song aimed at myself. I got to thinking how you could go about making this message less direct, and "The Gambler" came to mind - in that song, instead of the singer talking to the listener, it was a character talking to a singer. So a different approach would be to have the singer getting advice from a mechanic - "I don't know anything about love, but I know about fixing stuff..." sort of conceit, with the listener being able to make the jump between fixing rusty bolts and a relationship. I don't know that it would be a better - I'm not saying there's anything wrong with the direct approach - just saying it's a slightly different way to approach it. You'd have to waste at least one verse on the setup, so it's certainly not as efficient.
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CHORUS Love your Wife - like penetrating oil Soak her in your love - every day As it penetrates - to the hardest place Wait for your breakthrough - and pray for grace Love your Wife - like penetrating oil Paul, if I show this to my wife I am going to lose 3 hours right in the middle of my day. Oh heck, why not.
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Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
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Update Your PowerTracks Pro Audio 2024 Today!
The Newest RealBand 2024 Update is Here!
The newest RealBand 2024 Build 5 update is now available!
Download and install this to your RealBand 2024 for updated print options, streamlined loading and saving of .SGU & MGU (BB) files, and to add a number of program adjustments that address user-reported bugs and concerns.
This free update is available to all RealBand 2024 users. To learn more about this update and download it, head to www.pgmusic.com/support.realband.htm#20245
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For the larger Band-in-a-Box® packages (UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, Audiophile Edition), the hard drive backup copy is available for only $25. This will include a preinstalled and ready to use program, along with your installation files.
Backup copies are offered during the checkout process on our website.
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Update your Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows® Today!
Update your Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows for free with build 1111!
With this update, there's more control when saving images from the Print Preview window, we've added defaults to the MultiPicker for sorting and font size, updated printing options, updated RealTracks and other content, and addressed user-reported issues with the StylePicker, MIDI Soloists, key signature changes, and more!
Learn more about this free update for Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows at www.pgmusic.com/support_windowsupdates.htm#1111
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 Review: 4.75 out of 5 Stars!
If you're looking for a in-depth review of the newest Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows version, you'll definitely find it with Sound-Guy's latest review, Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows Review: Incredible new capabilities to experiment, compose, arrange and mix songs.
A few excerpts:
"The Tracks view is possibly the single most powerful addition in 2024 and opens up a new way to edit and generate accompaniments. Combined with the new MultiPicker Library Window, it makes BIAB nearly perfect as an 'intelligent' composer/arranger program."
"MIDI SuperTracks partial generation showing six variations – each time the section is generated it can be instantly auditioned, re-generated or backed out to a previous generation – and you can do this with any track type. This is MAJOR! This takes musical experimentation and honing an arrangement to a new level, and faster than ever."
"Band in a Box continues to be an expansive musical tool-set for both novice and experienced musicians to experiment, compose, arrange and mix songs, as well as an extensive educational resource. It is huge, with hundreds of functions, more than any one person is likely to ever use. Yet, so is any DAW that I have used. BIAB can do some things that no DAW does, and this year BIAB has more DAW-like functions than ever."
Convenient Ways to Listen to Band-in-a-Box® Songs Created by Program Users!
The User Showcase Forum is an excellent place to share your Band-in-a-Box® songs and listen to songs other program users are creating!
There are other places you can listen to these songs too! Visit our User Showcase page to sort by genre, artist (forum name), song title, and date - each listing will direct you to the forum post for that song.
If you'd rather listen to these songs in one place, head to our Band-in-a-Box® Radio, where you'll have the option to select the genre playlist for your listening pleasure. This page has SoundCloud built in, so it won't redirect you. We've also added the link to the Artists SoundCloud page here, and a link to their forum post.
We hope you find some inspiration from this amazing collection of User Showcase Songs!
Congratulations to the 2023 User Showcase Award Winners!
We've just announced the 2023 User Showcase Award Winners!
There are 45 winners, each receiving a Band-in-a-Box 2024 UltraPAK! Read the official announcement to see if you've won.
Our User Showcase Forum receives more than 50 posts per day, with people sharing their Band-in-a-Box songs and providing feedback for other songs posted.
Thank you to everyone who has contributed!
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