NEW SONG POST: If I was a Dog - 08/19/18 11:55 PM
Hello forum friends! One of the things I like almost as much as music is humor. I rarely mix the two....this song being a rare exception. One day I woke up and this line came into my head (title). I thought that was really weird but I decided I was just going to write and see what happened. This did. Hope you get a chuckle out of it. I'd love to hear your feedback. Take care. Greg
https://soundcloud.com/gjohnson-2/ifiwasadog
IF I WAS A DOG
If I was a dog, I’d be free as the breeze
Wanderin’ ‘round markin’ mailboxes and trees
Just one of the mutts, playing tag, sniffin’ butts
Not tryin’ to be crude, but I’d have dog attitude
If she was a dog, she’d have a fine pedigree
Spend long afternoons with the ladies at tea
Have papers that linked her to the most regal hounds
The upper of the uppermost crust to be found
We’d have no more in common than Juliet and Romeo
The scourge of the pound and the best in the show
If I had a master, he’d sleep in his van
Smoke cigarettes, drink beer straight from the can
Wear dirty T-shirts and have vulgar tattoos
Yellow teeth, uncombed hair, and wear trashy old shoes
Her master would be the quintessential success
Well-bred, educated, and impeccably dressed
And she herself, I fine dog, would be smothered in riches
And be seen at the park with the finest of [*****]
(remember, were talkin’ about dogs here)
In this protracted metaphor, you may find no surprises
But, then again, certainly one question arises
Of all the proverbial fish in the sea
What the hell is she doin’ with me?
https://soundcloud.com/gjohnson-2/ifiwasadog
IF I WAS A DOG
If I was a dog, I’d be free as the breeze
Wanderin’ ‘round markin’ mailboxes and trees
Just one of the mutts, playing tag, sniffin’ butts
Not tryin’ to be crude, but I’d have dog attitude
If she was a dog, she’d have a fine pedigree
Spend long afternoons with the ladies at tea
Have papers that linked her to the most regal hounds
The upper of the uppermost crust to be found
We’d have no more in common than Juliet and Romeo
The scourge of the pound and the best in the show
If I had a master, he’d sleep in his van
Smoke cigarettes, drink beer straight from the can
Wear dirty T-shirts and have vulgar tattoos
Yellow teeth, uncombed hair, and wear trashy old shoes
Her master would be the quintessential success
Well-bred, educated, and impeccably dressed
And she herself, I fine dog, would be smothered in riches
And be seen at the park with the finest of [*****]
(remember, were talkin’ about dogs here)
In this protracted metaphor, you may find no surprises
But, then again, certainly one question arises
Of all the proverbial fish in the sea
What the hell is she doin’ with me?