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#851278 05/05/25 10:46 PM
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Afternoon all,
CAROLPSYCH WIP
2 CAROLPSYCH WIP 2
I've not posted a song in a while - I've been writing & recording but nothing has quite made it to the end yet.
This track is, sadly, stuck with my vocal.
Part of the lyric is from an older song in a collaboration. I've altered them significantly & wrote new music rather than use the old as well.
BIAB content included:
organ - 2692
RealDrums - AltRockslowsteady8th
lead guitar - 3438 &
Piano - 811
I threw in the lap slide, bass, guitar and some MIDI stuff as well as the mournful vocal.
Oh, I threw in a vibraslap sample...not a great one but I'm experimenting with the placement of it. They're such odd things and can be corny as well as overused. I've placed it once and hope it makes sense.
DRENCHED in delay & reverb, this may not be many folk's cup of meat but, to me, it suits the vibe I was going for.
As it's a work in progress I'd LOVE feedback general & specific.
LYRICS:
Gravity asserts itself
Books fall from the shelf

Secret thoughts, secret fears,
Covert love, hidden tears.
Broken rhythm, broken rhyme

Love on earth’s not what it seemed
Life’s something I could not have dreamed
Tragedies compound
My flights of fancy hit the ground.

Gravity inverts itself
Books stack on the shelf

Secret thoughts, secret fears,
Crypto love, cryptic tears.
Spoken rhythm, token rhyme

Gravity diverts itself
Books burn on the shelf

Life on earth was someone’s dream
A lovely thought not long to gleam
Tragedies accrued
All my lessons were eschewed.

CAROLPSYCH WIP

Last edited by rayc; 05/08/25 08:04 PM.

Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
rayc #851280 05/06/25 02:15 AM
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Hi, Ray. This sounds quite nice to my ears. Your vocals (and FX) sound perfect. Like the vocal harmonies, and where you have the vocals in the mix. The arrangement has a deliciously unsettling vibe and thrum that is very appealing. The piano figures work really well, as do the little lead guitar fills. Nothing I hear sounds like too much or too little.

Not a smash-and-grab song, but don't think that's what you're going for. Psychedelic prog? Not my expertise, but think you nailed it. Surprised it's a WIP.

Nice to see you posting. smile


DC Ron
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Too many guitars (is that a thing?)
rayc #851291 05/06/25 03:49 AM
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Hey Ray,

I was not sure at first where this might go but as soon as your vocals came in I totally got it. It's an awesome progressive rock kinda sound. I'm not much help when it comes to the tech analysis, but I love it! Really curious about the backstory.

rayc #851338 05/07/25 12:06 AM
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Like how it gets more forceful towards the end before it dies down. Enjoyed the listen.

rayc #851341 05/07/25 02:17 AM
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Ray,

Love this sound...

Moody, beautiful and so well instrumented and mixed. Great vocal as well.

Excellent!

Bob

rayc #851349 05/07/25 06:00 AM
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Hey Ray,

This is a really cool work in progress man.

It has a real '60s touch to it, even kind of a Lo-Fi 60s touch like early King Crimson or something.

I like the keyboard sounds especially.

Can't wait to see what the next version sounds like!!

rayc #851350 05/07/25 06:25 AM
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Meat in a cup? I haven't eaten meat since 1983, but am not surprised it comes in cups now. Yet, if you're gonna be serving songs with this kind of meat on them, I will change my diet for sure. Ray, you know I always enjoy your vocals, specially with harmony, and my usual comment to raise their volume still stands. Man, this is quite the musical adventure, and I am such a happy explorer. Everything fits so well together and the mix is perfect. I know it's long, but I had to listen a couple times so far, and each revealed more amazing things inside. You are an outstqanding musical director, Ray.


Enjoy whatever happens!
marty

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Originally Posted by DC Ron
Hi, Ray. This sounds quite nice to my ears. Your vocals (and FX) sound perfect. Like the vocal harmonies, and where you have the vocals in the mix. The arrangement has a deliciously unsettling vibe and thrum that is very appealing. The piano figures work really well, as do the little lead guitar fills. Nothing I hear sounds like too much or too little.
Not a smash-and-grab song, but don't think that's what you're going for. Psychedelic prog? Not my expertise, but think you nailed it. Surprised it's a WIP.
Nice to see you posting. smile
Thanks DC,
Not my area of expertise either.
Have you heard the song by Died Pretty called DC?


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rayc
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Originally Posted by BYOBand
Hey Ray,

I was not sure at first where this might go but as soon as your vocals came in I totally got it. It's an awesome progressive rock kinda sound. I'm not much help when it comes to the tech analysis, but I love it! Really curious about the backstory.

Thanks BYOBand, a deliberately obtuse beginning I'm afraid.
The lyric started life during my stint as a collaborator with Spirit Level, in a song called Broken Rhythm . The results didn't quite work for me...I'd not spent enough time editing & thinking about it so, now that the song & collab are in the past I decided to do the necessary work and get the words to where I thought they should be.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by Mark K
Like how it gets more forceful towards the end before it dies down. Enjoyed the listen.
Thanks Mark.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by rsdean
Ray,
Love this sound...
Moody, beautiful and so well instrumented and mixed. Great vocal as well.
Excellent!
Bob
You're very kind Bob.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by David Snyder
Hey Ray,
This is a really cool work in progress man.
It has a real '60s touch to it, even kind of a Lo-Fi 60s touch like early King Crimson or something.
I like the keyboard sounds especially.
Can't wait to see what the next version sounds like!!
Ta David,
I've been thinking about KC Mellotron lately, not so much the sound as the way Fripp moved the chords - the leading tone thing he does so very well.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by BabuMusic
Meat in a cup? I haven't eaten meat since 1983, but am not surprised it comes in cups now. Yet, if you're gonna be serving songs with this kind of meat on them, I will change my diet for sure. Ray, you know I always enjoy your vocals, specially with harmony, and my usual comment to raise their volume still stands. Man, this is quite the musical adventure, and I am such a happy explorer. Everything fits so well together and the mix is perfect. I know it's long, but I had to listen a couple times so far, and each revealed more amazing things inside. You are an outstanding musical director, Ray.
Thanks Marty,
Not My Cup of Meat was a vulgar, deliberately unpleasant development from Not My Cup of Tea used by someone in the late 70s. I rather liked it surrealist bent and have used it occasionally - usually unfruitful.
You abstinence from animal protein out does my abstinence from alcohol by a good 14 years.


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rayc
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rayc #851405 05/07/25 10:20 PM
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G'day Ray
Giving feedback is always a bit like trying to defuse a bomb wearing oven mitts, isn't it? But hey, someone's gotta tell the emperor he maybe needs a bigger microphone. 🎤
The music's like a swirling galaxy of sound, all cool and atmospheric. But right now, your voice sounds like it's trying to shout instructions from the back of the spaceship. Let that incredible voice of yours soar and not just be there. We need to hear you! ◝(^⌣^)◜
Dig deep into that story, whatever it is – heartbreak, existential angst, the price of bread these days – and sell it to us like you're pitching the last life raft on the Titanic. Unleash the inner rock god! The music's already laying down the red carpet, just strut your stuff along it.
The music’s fantastic, atmospheric and wonderfully Ray-esque, but it’s there to boost the story, not bury it. Think about unleashing a bit more raw emotion. Let that story come roaring through!
My challenge to you, cobber, is to make me care about what you're singing. Drag me into that story! Unleash the vocal beast within!
So Ray, listen to my "advice" at your peril, but hey, you do have all my platinum records don't you? 😁

🙃

rayc #851410 05/08/25 04:30 AM
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Superb intro. I really like the overall atmosphere of the song, which is suspended and soaring. I love the guitars at 3:38.
Laurent

rayc #851411 05/08/25 04:31 AM
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Superb intro. I really like the overall atmosphere of the song, which is suspended and soaring. I love the guitars at 3:38.
Laurent

rayc #851425 05/08/25 07:50 AM
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Hi, Ray.

I'm with Izzy - this sounds good, but I can't hear the vocal. That doesn't work for me, but it seems fine for others.


-- David Cuny
My virtual singer development blog

Vocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?
rayc #851443 05/08/25 11:46 AM
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WOW. What an Opening! LOVE it.
Organ is perfect.
Smooth bass.
Love those vocals!
Cool lead guitar.
The piano break is sweet.
The drums are dull. They need some clarity.

Really nicely arranged and produced.
This is Good Work.
One of your best.

fj

Izzy #851485 05/08/25 07:54 PM
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Originally Posted by Izzy
G'day Ray
Giving feedback is always a bit like trying to defuse a bomb wearing oven mitts, isn't it? But hey, someone's gotta tell the emperor he maybe needs a bigger microphone. 🎤
The music's like a swirling galaxy of sound, all cool and atmospheric. But right now, your voice sounds like it's trying to shout instructions from the back of the spaceship. Let that incredible voice of yours soar and not just be there. We need to hear you! ◝(^⌣^)◜
Dig deep into that story, whatever it is – heartbreak, existential angst, the price of bread these days – and sell it to us like you're pitching the last life raft on the Titanic. Unleash the inner rock god! The music's already laying down the red carpet, just strut your stuff along it.
The music’s fantastic, atmospheric and wonderfully Ray-esque, but it’s there to boost the story, not bury it. Think about unleashing a bit more raw emotion. Let that story come roaring through!
My challenge to you, cobber, is to make me care about what you're singing. Drag me into that story! Unleash the vocal beast within!
So Ray, listen to my "advice" at your peril, but hey, you do have all my platinum records don't you? 😁
🙃
Thanks for the detail Izzy.
Sadly my voice isn't strong enough to emote...a passive, matter of fact evenness is all I can manage with lots of rehearsing, tracking, comping and tech manglement.
I have, however, boosted the vocal level just a little because your were so emphatic about my lack of emotion - when in doubt - crank it, I suppose.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by laurent4114
Superb intro. I really like the overall atmosphere of the song, which is suspended and soaring. I love the guitars at 3:38.
Laurent
Thanks Laurent, twice even!


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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