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Hi, I've uploaded an audio sample relatively anonymously on Soundcloud and would like to hear your opinions, because I do not know if that sounds good. I know that I am not the most blatant singer but that is not my goal. Nevertheless, I would like to know if I should continue on the song or ultimately just wasting my time xD Incidentally, I recorded many more songs, which I only hold privately.

Important: I'm german, so I would love to hear what you're honestly thinking about my english and if you can understand the lyrics, even if I'm inspired by artists like XXXTentacion, which are not very popular to understand their lyrics at the first hearing. (btw I'm 16 y/o)

Supposed - test

New Link https://soundcloud.com/user-61367554/supposed-test

To the song:
It's a freebeat from YouTube because I'm not able to build beats.
It's about the society that tells people how to behave or what goals to pursue.

Lyrics:
You supposed to agree
You supposed to know
You supposed to be
free but your freedom is gone
but your freedom is gone

You supposed to agree
You supposed to know
You supposed to see
what every human is looking for
every human is looking for

You supposed to agree
the rules of the world
and what people call normal even if it hurts
this cant be right
but you cant deny it

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Your English is not heavily accented so is more -or-less clear and understandable. To be honest, most hip-hop is neither in standard English nor in standard pronunciation, so I think there is no problem there.

Your theme is pretty universal, especially (but not exclusively) for young people trying to find their way.

Whether you should proceed is more of a philosophical question than a practical one. You're doing fine, and the answer may well be in your own lyric. Is it bringing you satisfaction, or are you aiming for what you are supposed to do? Do you want to write and vocalize in German?

I hope that helps.

Last edited by Tangmo; 04/25/19 08:18 AM.

BIAB 2021 Audiophile. Windows 10 64bit. Songwriter, lyricist, composer(?) loving all styles. Some pre-BIAB music from Farfetched Tangmo Band's first CD. https://alonetone.com/tangmo/playlists/close-to-the-ground
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Thanks for your feedback m8 <3

I will continue trying to improve and maybe switch around with german and english between every song, but I think english just sounds better and it's easier to find rhymes in this language.

I'm really thankful for your comment

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I really like what you've done.

The spoken introduction is great and your singing sounded fine to me. I love the message in your words.

In the sung section, the words were not as clear to me as in the introduction. I know that this was deliberate because you are aiming for a vocal effect when singing. Definitely keep on working on this. It has potential and you sound good.

Your English is excellent and I didn't hear any particular language accent at all. If you hadn't said anything, I would have thought you were a native speaker of English.

Regards,
Noel


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Hi N.S. - Great work on this! The 808 sounds very phat, as it should for this genre of music. Pretty solid chops too. Well done!


Cheers,
Joe
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Hi NS,

Definitely keep working on this. Your English is very good and your voice sounds very good also. When working on this you might want to consider bringing the vocals up front. This, thus far, is a great message and it should be hear loud and clear over the backing tracks. That is just my opinion and you may or may not agree with me, no problem if you don't agree with me.


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You could build those beats in BIAB easily.
The vocal is a little too slurred/out if it to be honest.
A retrack with some clarity and a little more diction (no much - don't need to button up), would really sell this.


Cheers
rayc
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I like what I heard. Should you keep going? Absolutely.

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Thanks to all you guys! Never expected feedback like this laugh

I will take the critism to my heart and try to re record it with more clarity!


Made my day thx xD

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Really nice work on this - and welcome to the forums smile Very modern sound, and your accent on this is very subtle. I thought the quality on the backing tracks mix was spot on.

Keep up the good work and thanks for sharing!


Cheers,
Deryk
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I think you're onto something good! There is a very catchy, emotional feeling here. Is any of this BIAB? Good stuff! Take care. Greg

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Stick with it, the beats loop is good, and the talking intro sample(s) are great!

Don't slur your vocals trying to sound like someone you're not. Listen to Kraftwerk's 'The Model', the English version, and the German accent is a major part of the record's charm, the same in Nina's '99 Red Balloons'. There's nothing wrong with singing in your natural accent - it could well be a hook as in those records!

John


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Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
I think you're onto something good! There is a very catchy, emotional feeling here. Is any of this BIAB? Good stuff! Take care. Greg


Thx m8 and I don't know what BIAB means so I think this isn't a thing in my song xD <3

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Originally Posted By: Skyline
Stick with it, the beats loop is good, and the talking intro sample(s) are great!

Don't slur your vocals trying to sound like someone you're not. Listen to Kraftwerk's 'The Model', the English version, and the German accent is a major part of the record's charm, the same in Nina's '99 Red Balloons'. There's nothing wrong with singing in your natural accent - it could well be a hook as in those records!

John


Thx for your critism! I will try to improve more natural singing. But I need to say, that this is my natural english accent xD I don't know but I'm not able to speak in a "german" accent. I just can't (idk why but it's already natural for me)

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Keep going...
Have confidence in yourself...
As a writer once said...
"Write what you feel & feel what you write."


Jim
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Liked the intro, experiment with different approaches to the lyric and see what people prefer.


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