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#722115 06/24/22 07:32 AM
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Hi, all:

I generally try to get a song as far along as I can before posting it . . . and typically only when I’m happy enough with the outcome. Which means there are always a few songs sitting around that I’ve never posted, generally because I just can’t get the song to a point I like.

There are a couple that have been lingering on my desktop that I’m just tired of looking at—so I’m just going to let them go and see if they have any legs. I think what I’m largely looking for is thoughts and suggestions on what’s missing and what can be added or done to make them pop a bit more. So any feedback along those lines would be great.

“Sometimes It’s Love” will be the first of three (I think) that I’ll send your way over the coming weeks or months. I wrote it in 2018 and did the BIAB version as late as 2020. I didn’t add any additional BIAB tracks or vocals to the 2020 file—just did a bit of a remix. Appreciate the listen and will look forward to the feedback.

Thanks much all—

Deej

Here’s the song:

SOMETIMES IT'S LOVE

Here are the lyrics:

She was sitting on a kitchen chair
And I was looking for some conversation
Saw right away she wasn’t really there
She didn’t look the way she should
Hey sweetie, with the silly songs
And the sugar smiles, tell me what’s gone wrong
She said, Daddy, my baby’s gone
And this time I think for good
So I told her

Sometimes it’s a thorn without a rose
Sometimes it’s the tender bud that grows
Sometimes it’s not so easy to explain
Sometimes it’s love, sometimes it’s rain

She shook her head and looked at me
And said, That ain’t no consolation
Why does love always have to be
The very thing you’re hurting from
And I know what you’re going to say
I’m gonna find true love some other day
Well, that may be so, but anyways
I kinda thought he was the one
And I told her

Sometimes it’s a highway paved in gold
Sometimes it’s just a dark and lonely road
Sometimes it’s a street without a name
Sometimes it’s love, sometimes it’s rain

And though the odds are even line
It seems to work out most the time
And all the things that weigh your mind
Will turn to dust—you’ll be just fine

You’ll grow up to have a good life
And meet the guy who’ll make your heart shine
Have kids of your own right
and when love breaks their hearts
there’s only so much you can say
So you’ll tell them that

Sometimes it’s a thorn without a rose
Sometimes it’s the tender bud that grows
Sometimes it’s a dream you chase in vain
Sometimes it’s love, sometimes it’s rain

Sometimes it’s a kite without a string
Sometimes it’s a shiny diamond ring
Sometimes it ain’t so easy to explain
Sometimes it’s love, sometimes it’s love
Sometimes it’s love, sometimes it’s rain

And here’s the band:


RealTracks 1417: Bass, RootsRock
RealTracks 2767: Cuatro, Rhythm PuertoRicoAguinaldo
RealTracks 1542: Piano, Acoustic, PopBelieve
RealTracks 1757: Accordion, Rhythm Pop 8ths
RealTracks 1606: Guitar, Acoustic, Strumming
RealDrums: Soul 70’s Ev16^1—ClsdHHtSn
RealDrums: Tambourine2and 4

Last edited by Deej56; 06/24/22 10:14 PM.
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Hey Deej...First off I love your voice...you sound like nobody else...you've got that folk/rock timbre and great clarity...my vote is "stick a fork in it" it's done...instrumentally I think adding would clutter an already busy (good) track...lyrically it's smart and rhymically cool...I love the back and forth contrasts of the choruses and I think this song is radio worthy IMHO...the intro is interesting in it's progressions...I wouldn't change a thing...your stuff is always so good!

Last edited by firesong; 06/24/22 08:07 AM.

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Deej,

GREAT vocals! This song is really easy to listen to! Love all the many chord changes happening! I also love that Cuatro, Rhythm PuertoRicoAguinaldo realtrack used here...I'll have to check that one out! This tune, even though your voice is a completely different style, reminds me very much of something that Gordon Lightfoot would have done back in day! But it still has a modern touch at the same time! I enjoyed my listen! You always bring high quality work when you post something!

Thanks, Torrey




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I really love that you're so versatile, musically. I never know what you're gonna come up with, next, and you've surprised me with this one, too - big time.

Top notch song. Stunning lyrics, and the mix is clear and comes across just fine. An unexpected background track, which (however) really works - and that's all it needs to do, which it does aplenty: work, and work well. Singing and musical writing, your usual high standard.

What to improve? God knows. I genuinely can't find anything (and I'm on my third listen, now) ... but maybe others on here may have some suggestions? Sorry! :-) Ok, if there's anything, it's this (and I'm being VERY picky now): the second guitar, the busy one (the one that's loudest in the beginning of the song), worries me a little - in the sense that it's (to my ears, of course) either too busy or too "up front" in the mix - and, perhaps, too omnipresent in the song? Your voice sings fast notes, too, so it feels a little like "fast on fast". BUT, that said: I can't think of what to do instead, it's just a little niggling thing for me, that's all ... and, in any case, genuinely, what do I know? As David Snyder recently wrote, you're such a good musician that, if you put it there, you KNOW why you did it. That said, it still bothers me, just a little - but, again, I may well be barking completely up the wrong tree. Do not mind me! :-)

Well done, though. Such a joy, always, to hear your songs.

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Deej,
it's areally good song.
I think that it may be a lack of variation in the instrumentation that's bothering you.
If you drop the Cuatro, (I think), from the verses so that it creates interest for the intro, (centre it for the intro) & ramps up the choruses but isn't a constant (maybe even pulling it in for the last bar of the verses as a lead in). It's an attractive sound and pattern but it may be overused.
I also think some bvox are needed for the choruses...nothing complicated but a held "sometimes" either from the beginning of the line OR starting after the main sometimes is sung and replace that with "it's love" for the last line.

These are suggestions during and after a couple of listens.
Suggestions I'm happy for you to ignore.
Regardless of a potential new iteration it's a good song.

Last edited by rayc; 06/25/22 07:39 PM.

Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Some things that popped into mind when I heard this:

Tom Petty/George Harrison sounding vocal.

A lot of compression in the mix, taking it to the optimal volume without causing any distortion.

Somewhere around 1:35 I sort I expected a (high-pitched) harmony vocal...(I would oblige, but it's above my range ;-))

Maybe the accordion could be slightly louder here and there?

REALLY great vocal!

Very professional use of BIAB.

Rob


We are Rob Meulman and Anne-Marie Bovenkamp from The Netherlands.

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Hi David
Good song
The background track is really interesting
And I think your voice brings everything together perfectly
Top work, David
Many greetings
Andi ;-)

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firesong, Torrey, James, Ray and Rob:

Boy, what great suggestions already . . . thanks so much for weighing in. Some specific comments below and a revised version of the song hopefully updated in the link.

James: Ironically, I had a second guitar in the song that I deleted because I thought it made the song too busy . . . In retrospect, I think I made the wrong choice. So, I've added back in RT 1608 High Acoustic Rhythm, subbing it in most spots for the RT 1606 Strumming Acoustic. Thought I've kept the latter playing only on the choruses panned far right to add some depth. Hopefully that makes a difference.

Ray: Brilliant suggestion on the cuatro. And it's something I've done on other songs, so not sure why it didn't occur to me here. I've cut the instrument on the first verse and dialed in down on the second. And thereafter, a bit more judicious on the volume, being a bit more strategic in highlighting it. I'm sure I can still do better, but hopefully a good start in a better direction. See my comment below to Rob on the BGVs.

Rob: I've tried to highlight the accordion a bit more here and there (and hopefully the right spots) in this latest mix. I just wasn't up to tackling BGVs on this--largely because I had no ideas on how to approach them (but also because I wasn't all that enthused about the tune to spend the time). You and Ray have given me some excellent suggestions . . . and now I'm excited to experiment. Thanks so much.

Awesome feedback, all. Very much appreciated--

Deej

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Lovely "educational" lyrics, unexpected opposites sound refreshing ("thorn without a rose", "kite without a string"). Reminded me of Oasis, so I was expecting more electric approach with stronger drumming, but that is just my preference, the song works very well in the current way and is well in line with the positive message. I really like the cuatro.

Janne


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First I'd like to ditto what Dan (firesong) says about your vocals. This is a really good song because that's what you write, and it's, of course, so well sung. As I was listening the first time I was all about this song is really good and needs nothing. Then on the second listen I found myself in Ray's camp about making the instrumentation more distinct --verse compared to the chorus. Also, that "Sometimes... sometimes... sometimes... sometimes it's love" is a good idea in chorus. A 2- or 3-part harmony would work to create that distinction as well.


Enjoy whatever happens!
marty

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For me, much better, now. Your voice is much more highlighted, this way. There's a good contrast, also, now, between chorus and verses, with the guitar used more sparingly :-)

On an "a propos of nothing" aside: on listening again, I was struck by the lyrics, once more. Not only their content, but also the way they are written. Well done.

Last edited by musician17; 06/25/22 09:35 AM.
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Deej I would say that this one is finished

Outstanding vocal, much like Tom Petty

Great backing tracks

Super lyrics

Loved it


Me, it's not about how many times you fail, it's about how many times you get back up.
Cop, that's not how field sobriety tests work.

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Originally Posted By: RnAM
Some things that popped into mind when I heard this:

Tom Petty/George Harrison sounding vocal.

Rob


Update:
What I really meant was Dave Pirner from Soul Asylum smile
See the resemblances here.

Rob


We are Rob Meulman and Anne-Marie Bovenkamp from The Netherlands.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1gsdNLE7_Gy8qavoOplQow/videos
http://rnam.net/


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Cool tune Deej. Awesome vocal and lyric. I really liked the backtrack as well. Mandolin was a cool add. Well done.


Scott Collingwood
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Deej,

A good listen. Good write. Excellent vocals.

Mix sounds good to me.

fj

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Janne, Marty, Mario, Scott and Fj—

Thanks for the listens—much appreciated. A few specific comments on the feedback:

Janne: Drums were one of the toughest parts of the arrangement . . . and they are always my achilles heel to begin with. I did toy with more aggressive percussion but ultimately thought this landed in a balanced spot. Maybe, maybe not.

Marty: At some point, I’ll try to tackle the BGVs—thanks for the suggestions. Still not sure I can wrap my head around them, but it will be fun to mess with when I get around to it!

James and RnAM: Thanks for checking back in!

Stay safe, all—

Deej

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Deej,
Fantastic write! Ace vocals, instrumentals and mix. Excellent set of lyrics. Listens VERY well. Enjoy it.
Thank you for sharing.

Misha.

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We like it as is.

Excellent lyric, vocals and mix.

Maybe, as others mentioned, changing up the instrumentation between verse and chorus would ease your mind.
We think Ray well illustrated that possibility.

Enjoyed it!

J&B

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Misha and J&B:

Thanks for stopping in and for the feedback.

Hope all is wel in your worlds--

Deej

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No extra suggs from me Deej apart from I would change that line to
"sometimes it's sun, sometimes it's rain". Only because love isn't strictly an alternative to rain.
You probably already thought of that though.

And then you'd have to change the title too.

It's a good song and your usual high standard.

Vic

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