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Posted By: Rob Helms Original tune - 11/03/10 07:18 PM
Here is a song i wrote for a very dear person that made some incredible changes in their life. The song was based in BiaB for the basic song bed. The lead guitar and vocals were recorded in over that song bed using a DAW called Multitrack studio. The reverb was MTS's convolution reverb, and the compressor the basic one in that program. I used my Gibson S-1 electric thru a Digitech RP 200 petal, and the vocals were recorded using an audio-Tecnica AT 20 20 Condensor mike, and a Presonus preamp. The Samples for the midi instruments were sampletank free 2, PS fretted, and jamstix for drums with a BiaB drum midi track at the root.

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=7459383 Hope you enjoy.
Posted By: Achordocaster Re: Original tune - 11/03/10 09:14 PM
Rob,

Nice song. I think the bed tracks are good, but I do hear some pitch issues with the vocal tracks, especially the chorus and specifically the word (Night) at the end of the chorus is not good. I think I'd re-do the guitar solo as well, it seems a little out of tune at times.

Please don't take offense, as my comments are meant to be taken in a constructive way and they're JMHO anyway;)

Sincerely,

Greg
Posted By: Rob Helms Re: Original tune - 11/04/10 01:09 AM
no offense taken at all i hear that as well.
Posted By: Noel96 Re: Original tune - 11/04/10 09:32 AM
Hi Rob,

I really enjoyed the vibe/groove that you had happening here. It's a beautifully relaxed feel that does justice to the lyrics. You snared me the minute it started. Have you ever tried singing this in more of a "speaking" style? I was at a weekend workshop with Beth Nielsen Chapman a few months back and she introduced us all to a concept that she called "talking in pitch and in rhythm to the music". It was pretty impressive. People would present their song and then she showed them how to "speak" in pitch rather than sing. In every instance, it worked a treat and noticeably improved the song's presentation. The reason that I mention this is because I think this song could benefit from such an approach.

Thanks for posting! As I said, I was with you all the way from bar 1

All the best,
Noel
Posted By: Rob Helms Re: Original tune - 11/04/10 04:02 PM
Thanks that is an intersting approach for sure.This song was a one time run thru I am going to take an afternoon and lay down three more lead vocals and see what happens. I also want to do a bit better job on the back vocals.
Posted By: Daisy Re: Original tune - 11/04/10 05:04 PM
Hi, Rob:

I liked the track a lot... I was immediately reminded of Jackson Browne's work from the seventies, especially "For Everyman," and your guitar was very reminiscent of David Lindley on that album -- tasty, nice.

I also heard some "pitchy" problems, but I know you hear them too, and your plan of recording some new vocals sounds right on.

One suggestion: I don't want to make any specific suggestions, it's really a matter of taste and how you hear it, but you might reconsider some of the chords in the chorus section, maybe some more interesting variations, to increase the dynamics or tension. As I say, not criticism, just my hearing on it.

Also, as I think about it, at first I thought you were singing about coming "home" to Heaven, but then it seems you're simply singing about a return to earthly origins, home town, family, something like that. Although ambiguity in song lyrics is no bad thing, this seems just a tad too ambiguous. Maybe a little detail would be helpful ... what do you think?

Good work.
Daisy
Posted By: Sundance Re: Original tune - 11/05/10 01:15 AM
Hey Rob,
I agree with Noel. "It's a beautifully relaxed feel that does justice to the lyrics." And I really like what the lyrics are saying.

Since you said you are redoing the lead vocal, (which btw, I'm not as critical of as some.) grin. My suggestion is to change the harmony part. Especially, the harmony note on "night" which is conflicting with your lead and making it sound off. For example, on "night" singing unison would sound better OR you could go higher there with the harmony. I'd experiment with some different harmonies for something sweeter that compliments the lead vocal more.
Posted By: Rob Helms Re: Original tune - 11/05/10 02:03 AM
All great suggestions. I will take all of this in when i sit down to do the final takes. Ambiguous is the right word, and you were right on. The sentiment behind is someone coming back to their roots after years of floundering in a painful experience. It was meant to be both soulful, and spiritual in nature. This song was very hard to sing, and it shows in the vocal. There is a ton of emotion in it. That in part along with a serious lack of talent is the reason for the pitchiness. Plus i have always had difficulty with songs that have no true melody to follow. I guess I am the melody in this.

I like the idea of maybe a chord change in the chorus. I will take a hard look at that.

Thanks to all for the thoughts. Rob
Posted By: Achordocaster Re: Original tune - 11/05/10 06:00 AM
Rob,

I just listened again and it sounds like you re-did the vocals & guitar track 'cause I think they all sound MUCH better!

Now if it turns out you didn't re-do anything... Please accept my apology for my earlier post above ... and I guess maybe I should make that appointment for my check-up!

Take Care,

G.
Posted By: Muzic Trax Re: Original tune - 11/06/10 10:47 PM
I like it Rob !! Reminds me of the old 80's Christian Music Ballads, which I am very fond of

I know its not easy to write your own songs and you have done it here, WTG.

Keep em coming brother.

Trax
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