This is my absolute first BIAB tune. I'm a 'seasoned' musician but am an utter BIAB newbie. I'm really interested to know what you would have done different with BIAB?

All the tracks are 100% BIAB except the piano and vocals. I rendered the tracks separately from BIAB and mixed (and recorded the piano and vocals) in cakewalk sonar.

I'm pretty good about repaying critiques. I enjoy listening critically to stuff as it seems to help me as well as you. So if you're not interested in constructive feedback, please let me know!
Thanks!


Honk if You Love Jesus (at soundclick)

Lyrics by Nathan A. Baker
Vocals, Piano, Arranged and Produced by Ian Ferrin

Verse 1
Judi was a tree hugger
She had brown eyes and auburn hair
Drove a vintage Volkswagen camper
It was slow but it got her there
Her van covered in bumper stickers
Psychedelic art and sayings grand
She and a guitar picker
Set off to see the land

Chorus
“Kindness makes a difference”
“Think before you speak”
“Honk if you love Jesus”
“Let’s clean up Copper Creek”

Verse 2
A few hundred miles a day
Between strip malls parking lots
Traveling on what they made
Busking in the market spots
They ate at road side diners
Tasted their way west
Guitar pickers like cheddar
Judi liked Gouda best

Repeat Chorus

Bridge
They worked away their summer
Hauled old tires, pop cans and trash
If love was a raging fire
Judi’s heart would have been ash
For twenty years she saved the forest
And became that guitar picker’s wife
Twenty years of conquest
Until a sudden totally unexpected and
random and crazy sicknesss...
took her life

Repeat Chorus

“Honk if you love Jesus”
“Let’s clean up Copper Creek”


Copyright 2013 Baker and Ferrin

HONK, HONK, Superb inaugural BIAB tune. Look forward to hearing more!

Hi Ian,

I agree with Robert. what a superb inaugral tune. The arrangement and mix have a very professional sound.

I'm perfectly comfortable with giving (and receiving) constructive feedback and, if I could offer anything of value in this instance, I'd do it without hesitation. Within the scope of my hearing, there's nothing that I'd change musically at all. You've got it right as far as I'm concerned!

All the best,
Noel

Hi Ian
welcome to the Showcase. I'm a bit of a Newbie here too - scarey isn't it.
I just love the total variety of music that our Showcase presents. You don't have to like it all but you can't fail to be impressed with what folks can do with BIAB / RT.
Excellent song although I was a bit saddened by the last two lines of the bridge - kinda took the "happiness" out of it and left me feeling a bit down after being quite UP there with the words and the thoughts. Just my opinion.
The BIAB choice of instruments is great and that Piano, standing forward of the others, is just SO right. (Dunno why, it reminded me juts a tiny bit of Joshua Kadison's style with "Jessie". But this is top class in in its own right.)
Some of us post up the Instruments chosen for the BIAB mix - see my post below or many others. That way WE can learn how certain tracks go together.
Looking forward to more.
cheers
Ian (another one!)

Ian,

Welcome to the forum!

A truly enjoyable song. An interesting, intelligent lyric - and a wonderful story. Loved how the chorus was simply "bumper stickers" - that was a great idea and worked surprisingly well. Tell Nathan "great job".

The production is top-notch. The muted electric against your piano works really well. A very full sound without being over-done. Everything sits right where it should be. And your vocal is cool - a great sound.

One thing (since you asked...). Just a touch of electric lead would be nice. In between chorus and verse. Perhaps behind the chorus as well. To "balance" that very nice piano. To take the focus off the piano for just a moment - and then the piano would "grab you" again. Maybe one of the PopPromise leads or one of Brent's - not overdone - a spinkle here and there. (After all, Judi took up with a guitar picker).

Great stuff. Truly.. looking forward to much more!

floyd

Robert, Noel, Ian and Floyd,

Thanks very much guys for the props! Very much appreciated.

Ian - All the instruments are the default instruments in the "praise shining" real set (I think that's what it was called) I didn't change anything. I actually rendered out a fiddle track and a resonator guitar track, but didn't use them. IMO this tune is pretty solidly in the pop-country category even though I didn't use any overtly country sounds. I was thinking I'd "countrify" it, but I liked it with the more pop oriented sounds so I just left it as is. If this tune catches on at all, I might do a more countrified remix.

Floyd - I like that idea of a lead guitar. I don't know if you noticed but the piano plays the same melody in the intro, interlude and ending. If I were to put a lead guitar in there, it would have to play that same melody. How difficult is that to accomplish in BIAB? Can you make one of the 'real' BIAB players track a midi melody or would I have to use a midi track?

Thanks for the helpful feedback!

Peace,

Ian

Hey Ian,

Welcome to the forum,
I liked this. Good vocals and production. For some reason I hear this song as a track for a musical.
I agree with Floyd about the guitar part.
In my opinion an excellent first BIAB tune!

Check out my most recent song "Walk In The Light". It's a little ways down on the list.

Greg

Hi Ian,

very clever lyrics.
And good piano and arrangement.

Guenter

Ian,

Clever and well done. I agree with Floyd, impressive use of the bumper stickers. Not much to add to the other comments. Nice song. Enjoyed it.

Oh, and welcome to the forum!

Steve

Hi,
I think this is one great song. The vocal timing is good - it really emphasises the meaning.

The mix is good.

If I had one constructive criticism I would change the title! Since the line “Let’s clean up Copper Creek” is the final line of the chorus, I'd use that. You make the point on the site that the song is a love of life, not a religious tune, and “Let’s clean up Copper Creek” I think invites a listener in more.

I haven't posted that much original stuff yet but I more than welcome constructive criticism.

Best wishes

Ian,

I certainly understand your intent - going for a signature lick with the opening melody. Always a great idea. In this case, you need to "change something" for that to work. Don't get me wrong... the playing is stellar... but...

I missed "the lick" (melody) when I listened (entirely) - and I listened several times because I enjoyed the song so much. So "the lick" lacked the punch it needed to make it recognizable (that "The Way It Is" lick/punch - I assume is what you are after).

So... (imo) you need to somehow "add some punch" to that "lick" or find something different - like an electric lead (which would be my choice - for the reasons stated before). Again... the piano is GREAT - I just feel that it would be nice to have attention drawn away from it for a moment to truly enjoy it when it returns...

You cannot make the RealTracks play something specific (you can use midi for that, with an outside sound source - I'm not a "midi-guy"). You have to work "the other direction". Generate tracks until you hit on a lick that would work as a signature and use that (cut n paste) wherever you need it. (Apparently, from feedback, I need to go find one of my own for my current post...)

floyd

It's been said....but I really like the chorus made up of the stickers, the mix, the overall production and the vocal. I came from the 60's VW era and your imagery is great.

Regarding how to make a RealTrack work with the melody my approach is to continue to regenerate tracks until I get one that is melodic "enough" to complement the melody lick/vocal or at the least not distract from it. Some times I will create another SGU file with just the measures for which I'm interested in and regenerate the RealTrack many times and then transfer them to my DAW where I'll paste up the licks that I like in my primary track. Often if I hit on a good signature lick I'll use it several times in the song. It's really impressive as to how many variations can be generated from one RealTrack.

Welcome and thanks for posting.

Greg, Guenter and Steve - Thanks very much and thanks for checking out the tune!

Phil - I originally thought the same thing as you about the title, but it's grown on me. The 'hook' melody is, at least, intended to be "kindness makes a difference" which is then pretty much repeated with "honk if you love Jesus". "Honk if you love Jesus" is by far the most 'real' and classic of the bumper sticker slogans. Also it has the hook melody. I get what you're saying, the only even slightly religious bit in the song is that one line, but in a way it kind of gives it an edge. IMO the only other real alternative is "Kindness makes a difference" and that just doesn't have much of a ring to it IMO. Plus - Nathan would have to be on board with it and I have a feeling he likes the Jesus line.

Floyd and Mootsman - Thanks for the good info on using realtracks for a melody part. You got me thinking. Floyd - I purposefully didn't mix the piano out front. The melody I'm playing is basically the 'kindness makes a difference' melody. It's OK w/ me if it's kinda subliminal and not all that noticeable. IE 'under the top'...

I still get what you're saying. I'm thinking about it...

Thanks guys!

Ian

Welcome to the Users Showcase Ian. Nice first post. I also liked the bumper sticker chorus. Enjoyed your vocal too.

Quote:

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I was a bit saddened by the last two lines of the bridge - kinda took the "happiness" out of it and left me feeling a bit down after being quite UP there with the words and the thoughts

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I had the ssme reaction as the other Ian. Not saying that's good or bad just how it made me feel. I'm assuming you wrote it with that emotional effect in mind.

You can use the generate riffs feature also to find musical phrases.