Hi Folks.
Here is my new tune of the new year for your consideration.
I try to stay away from pre-planned song writing, this was a semi-improvisation.
Some of lyric choices are sloppy, I know
Improving suggestions are very welcomed.


Wounds


BIAB:
2960: Bass, Acoustic, SmoothBalladNeil
910:Piano, Electric, Rhythm
RealDrums=SmoothBalladBrushes
542:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm Dream
1402: Guitar, Electric, Rhythm Soul70sWarmSync
2820: Harp, Rhythm
1856: Cello, Background
2110: Horns Section, Background
1690: piano


Lyrics

Nordic wind howls and weeps,
growls and puffs like a boar
I am waiting for your sail ships
on a shore

Morning brings new worries
Got this feeling, as a fish thrown on sand dunes
Where is doctor in clean white clothes
Who can heal my open wounds

Night spreads silky feathers
Thousand stars like diamonds in rough
I am standing on top of the mountain
waiting for your space craft.

Poisonous anxiety encroaching
Feeling like a spaceman on the moon
Where’s doc in clean white clothes
who can heal my open wounds

Winter is breathing on the back of my head
Those whispers get stronger
I am waiting for your dusty bus
on the corner

Empty hours like nesting dolls
Looking for handsome grooms
We need a doctor in clean white clothes
who can heal our open wounds


Thank you for listening!

Misha,
Terrific - yep terrific.
I LOVE the Satchmo bit.
The lyrics are fabulous though you might consider...
.... sailing ships
and clothes is, generally, pronounced clow thz
Neither detract from the song in any way.
You're growing at the speed of sound.

Yea this was nice and laid back it seemed to be well placed and arranged.

Wee nit.. I could not make out a lot of the words until I looked at the lyrics, maybe it was just me or was it an effect on the vocals, maybe tad low on volume instruments a bit high anyway.

I Thought it was good and different, what we strive for yea ?.

Love the unique expressions in the lyrics. Vocals are also unique and quite fitting. Good take on the topic. Love the in the moment expression of it.

Misha,

A meander through our mind ( at least when you wrote this!) is entertaining and the musical style fits.
Please don`t change your singing style to same same English standards... I like the way you turn "clothes" into " "clozes". A part of your undeniable style that works for many, I think.

Robert

I cannot believe that you are the same person as the one I was pointing out issues with the mixing a few months ago. You are a fast, fast learner!

I like the song, the way you mixed it and the general feeling one gets when listening to this track. Very nice indeed!

I would love to hear this song in your native language!!!
I of course know that you are not Russian, but the song very much reminded me of traditional Russian folk songs (which is a good thing - I love those songs).

Will

A very enjoyable song! As rayc said, the "Sachmo" voice was great!

I hope you don't mind my comments are mostly on pronouncing the words - clarity is important, especially when you've got such interesting imagery. For example, I thought the first words of the song were "North Dakota" until I read the lyrics.

You're doing better with your vowel selection, but if you were to re-sing it (which I'm not suggesting you do) there are some places where I think you could fix. For example, "weeps" should be a long E "wEEps", not "wIHps", and "clothes" should be "klOWz", not "kLOWzIHz".

"Waiting for your space craft" wasn't imagery that I expected, although you paired it up with "spaceman on the moon".

I love the scatting at 1:40. For a song already filled with incongruity, this is icing on an already yummy cake.

"Awaiting for your dusty bus" can simply be "waiting for your dusty bus" (nice inner rhyme, by the way).

I heard "Looking for handsome grooms" as "Looking for cancer rooms", which makes no more (or less) sense, I guess.

You're getting better about not putting "UH" on the end of words, but it sneaks in, like on the end of "Those" in "Those whispers". The easiest way to fix it would be to cut it off it off the end of the words in the audio editor, if your DAW lets you do that.

Your songs are really fun to listen to.

Yeah!! Love the scat, wasn't expecting it, but sounded great!

It's always a new adventure listening to one of your songs, never quite know what to expect other than it will be something interesting and unique.

Good stuff, Misha, enjoyed!

Ray, You are very diplomatic I did not want to annoy you with this, be assured, I will bother you down the road Thank you for listening and kind feedback.

Beatmaster, Thank you for listening! Interesting observation, I thought that vocals were a bit too loud.
You are absolutely right about "making out words". I only wrote a handful of songs in English. I need to practice more on pronunciation.


Belladonna, Thank you for listening and kind comments.

Robert, thank you for support. I have a feeling accent will stay with me for a very long time. It is beyond my control

Will, Thank you for commenting on mixing! It is always a fight, but I am getting a bit better at it
Also, sir, you got me inspired and I have done a Russian version. I was born in Latvia, but I am ethnic Russian. I will post link in showcase today.

David, Thank you! I don't mind your comments, I treasure them. That is how my learning process works Pronunciation and articulations are very challenging for me. Most of my tunes are semi-improvisations and at times it is hard to snap to correct pronunciation when I record. Oh boy, was I laughing yesterday at this:"I heard "Looking for handsome grooms" as "Looking for cancer rooms", which makes no more (or less) sense, I guess." btw, you have a very interesting project going on, synSinger.


Dave, Thank you for listening! I was not expecting scat too Was having fun with tune, decided to leave it in place. I find at times, what seems to be ridiculous at start actually works better than something that undergoes surgeries.

I guess I'm unaffected by some the nuances of language which others mentioned...
Heck I still enjoy listening to the American group the Kingsmen... "Louie Louie"...
But I'm still uncertain of some of the words they sing .

You might consider participating in FAWM (February Album Writing Month - 14 songs in 28 days).
You'll have a lot of chances to "try to stay away from pre-planned song writing" .
https://fawm.org/

FAWM sounds like a fun, but hard challenge - I think it is the same that Joanne Cooper wrote about in another thread. I might sign up for that.

How is the community there? Are they nice people who accepts that it is quite impossible to make 14 good tracks within the 28 days? Some tracks are bound to be average in quality.

Will

Very nice imagery with busses, ships and space crafts, from Nordic winds to sand dunes and mountains You have great vision and you have done fantastic job with your powerful and surprising interpretation. The band supports the beautiful melody and chording.

Janne

Hi Misha,

Your songs are always a new and fun adventure. I love your music - it always entertains me in so many different ways. everything about this is interesting - the lyric, the chord progression, the scat singing - the Satchmo vocal characterization, the choices on the backing tracks - yeah, everything!

As far as your enunciation of English words - it doesn't bother me at all. I love your vocals! They're always so passionate and full of surprises. I always look forward to clicking onto your songs - they are treats waiting to be sampled!

Alan

Jim, Thank you for listening and support!
FAWM challenge is interesting, however it is hard for me as I have a full time job, otherwise I would probably try it

Janne, thank you for listening and kind words!

Alan, Thank you for listening and encouraging feedback! An American friend, former band leader shared his philosophy on pronunciation with me. He said: sing how you feel, people will still put their meanings into it, regardless of what you are trying to say. People hear what they want to hear Not that I try to follow that reasoning, but I thought it was very interesting.

Loved this song Misha. Very cool song. The scat was an excellent addition to the song. Well done. Super vocal...

Misha,

It is a delight to listen to your songs.

I cannot imagine being able to write songs in a second language. To be able to do it with such vivid imagery is astounding. (we have a number of folks on this forum who's native language is not English, yet they write interesting stuff in English - you all amaze me).

"Winter is breathing on the back of my head" - I really liked that line in particular...

The music is fresh! A treat for the ear. The mix is good. Your vocals sit very nicely in your mixes.

fj

Great feel to this Misha!! Has a romantic feel mixed with a mysterious vibe, like Al Stewart's Year of the Cat. Your vocals always sound great! What is your signal path in recording and mixing? Really cool song!! Take care. Greg

Misha

A delightful listen - loved the scat singing and the growling vocal.
Excellent work.

Peter

Scott, Peter Thank you for listening and support!

FJ, Thank you! It is actually very fun to write things when you know two languages. (probably more fun if you know 3 or more I started to write tunes in English fairly recently and like a good student, I am trying to do the homework Need to write a dozen more to loosen up. Thank you for comment on mixes., I am getting a hang of basic stuff. Long road ahead.

Greg, Thank you for kind words. The path... on most recent tunes:
Neumann TLM 107--->Arturia Audiofuse--->Nectar2--->Cakewalk Prochannel---->Master Bus with Rob Papen Mastering VST + Izotope Stereo Imager. I also use Neutron to monitor mix. In some cases I would use Vocal Rider VST.

Best regards,
Misha.