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Posted By: Birchwood Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/07/20 05:38 PM
https://soundcloud.com/user-296497130/who-tells-him

Hello everyone,

Here is my tribute for august. It is a Rock-Blues style with a very nice solo.
I had this song nearly ready in july, but I decided at the same time to change my recording studio into something more handy. So it had to wait untill the studio was ready to record the background vocals.
The song had to be light with a nice beat and solo. The lyrics are humorous or meant to be.
I hope you enjoy it, but let me know what mistakes I made, or what I did right!

The song is in C, the tempo 105 bpm.
The style is OLDDAYS.STY (Old Days Rootsy Country Rock)

RealTracks 2260:Bas, Funky Groove
RealTracks 1155:Organ, B3
RealTracks 2635:Guitar, Electric
RealTracks 2634:Guitar, Electric
RealTracks 1937:Synth, Ritme, EuroDance Chorus 7 Hit Straight
RealTracks 2203:Solo guitar, Electric
RealDrums DrivingPop8ths^01-a:HiHat, Snare, b:Open Hat, Snare

The lyrics
Who tells him
(c) HWBerkhout, july 2020

We were homeless, then saw that building
It was an old hotel near Mook
The place looked abandoned,
so we decided to take a closer look

It was enormous, just wat we needed
But then an old man came walking in
He chose himself the biggest room
and did not say anything

So, we stood there with an open mouth
And thought what's this all about?
He just have to leave right now, but

Chorus 1
Who tells him
Who's gonna tell him
that here he cannot stay
Who's tellin'
Who's gonna tell him
He got to leave today
Leave and go away

We couldn't sleep well, 'cause he captured our hotel
Therefore we had to hate him
And the next morning we went to his room
to hand him our ultimatum

He wasn't home though, to our surprise
We thought he left us, so we were enjoyed
While celebrating, we saw he came back
And that made us very annoyed,

We stood there with an open mouth
And thought what's this all about?
He just have to leave right now, but

Chorus 2
Who tells him
Who's gonna tell him
here he cannot stay
Who's tellin'
Who's gonna tell him
that he got to leave today

Solo

Aah,
We were twisting about the whole situation
But then he entered, with wine in his fists
"Who would like to try some"? He asked with a smile
He knew we could not resist, but...

We stood there with an open mouth
And thought we judged him all wrong
Now we have to plea he must stay, but...

Chorus 3
Who's  tellin'
Who's gonna tell him
that now he has to stay
Yes, who's tellin'
Who's gonna tell him
That he cannot go away
+
It doesn't matter who's gonna tell him
We believe he must stay
Oh, It doesn't matter who's there to tell him
everything is ok
No, It doesn't matter who's gonna tell him
He cannot go away
+
We just want him to stay

Solo
Posted By: BlueAttitude Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/08/20 05:26 AM
Yeah! Great groove. Good vocal, nice solo.

Starting from 3:30 to the end of the song .... loved it! Ending seems a bit abrupt, I wonder if you could extend that last chord so it dies out naturally?

But yeah, good song, Hans.
Posted By: floyd jane Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/08/20 10:03 AM
Hans,

A terrific Rockin' sound. The overall mix is really good - creating an excellent groove. The synth stabs are an excellent addition at the right time to add interest. Drums sound good. Loved that bass interlude. Cool guitar solos (maybe a little loud).

A good, interesting write.

The vocal is quite piercing. The vocal itself is really good - well sung with good enthusiasm, energy, clarity. A good level performance. By "piercing", I mean there is much more high-EQ than it needs. I believe you could roll off the high EQ completely above about 2k (maybe even farther than that - 1k?) and it would STILL be a very clear vocal, but would then have some "warmth" that would let it sit in the mix better. Other than these comments about the vocal EQ, I think this is one of your best arrangement/productions/songs...

A cool song.

fj
Posted By: Birchwood Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/08/20 11:00 AM
Originally Posted By: BlueAttitude
Yeah! Great groove. Good vocal, nice solo.

Starting from 3:30 to the end of the song .... loved it! Ending seems a bit abrupt, I wonder if you could extend that last chord so it dies out naturally?
But yeah, good song, Hans.


Hi Dave, thanks very much for your comment! And yes, the end was a bit too quick. I tried to enlarge it a bit in the Daw, but that was no succes (too artificial). And it took me quite a while getting the leadguitar doing what I want on the solopart. I am afraid by enlarging all I also have to render everything. reslut of that; no more this kind of solo. But I continue searching for a proper solution.

Originally Posted By: floyd jane
Hans,
A terrific Rockin' sound. The overall mix is really good - creating an excellent groove. The synth stabs are an excellent addition at the right time to add interest. Drums sound good. Loved that bass interlude. Cool guitar solos (maybe a little loud).
A good, interesting write.

The vocal is quite piercing. The vocal itself is really good - well sung with good enthusiasm, energy, clarity. A good level performance. By "piercing", I mean there is much more high-EQ than it needs. I believe you could roll off the high EQ completely above about 2k (maybe even farther than that - 1k?) and it would STILL be a very clear vocal, but would then have some "warmth" that would let it sit in the mix better. Other than these comments about the vocal EQ, I think this is one of your best arrangement/productions/songs...
A cool song.

fj


Hi Floyd, thanks also for your nice comment! I am happy with it, and with your EQ-comment. I must admit this is my weakest point. You have mentioned that more often on my songs. Misha and I had some discussions on this matter as well.
The thing is I don't get it how it happens. When recording the vocals the sound stays good, but somewhere while mixing that sibilance occurs. DS plugins don't work good enough. I even use a DS during mastering. I do drop down the EQ on the vocals, but maybe not too drastically. I am pretty sure the headroom and the bandwith is playing a role in this issue, don't you? But thanks a lot. Keeps me learning...

Stay save both,
Hans
Posted By: BabuMusic Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/08/20 02:07 PM
Loved the experience and enthusiasm in your vocal, Hans. Really funny story with an understandable twist. If you were to write another verse after the wine is gone, would you go back to who's going to tell him to he can't stay? hehe. Love your sense of humor, man, and the songs you write. It's still early in August, so... keep them coming.
Posted By: dcuny Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/08/20 02:38 PM
Ha! I especially enjoyed the lyrics! laugh

The lead guitar was a bit loud (especially a the beginning), but I'll leave any other comments about the mix to the experts.
Posted By: Greg Johnson Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/08/20 08:18 PM
A cool tale!! Reminds me of a saying my old friend had: You can't buy friends, but if you have good drugs, you can put down a deposit. This is very well produced and mixed too! Enjoyed!! Take care. Greg
Posted By: Tano Music Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/09/20 09:41 AM
Really liked the backed-up vocal during the chorus. Also liked your use of the organ. Excellent mix. Loved the sound. Fun song!
Posted By: Birchwood Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/09/20 05:44 PM
Originally Posted By: BabuMusic
Loved the experience and enthusiasm in your vocal, Hans. Really funny story with an understandable twist. If you were to write another verse after the wine is gone, would you go back to who's going to tell him to he can't stay? hehe. Love your sense of humor, man, and the songs you write. It's still early in August, so... keep them coming.


Hey Marty, yes the original song lasted much longer because of what you said... No that is a lie. But it's true it lasted much longer, because I liked the sound of the leadguitar. So the solopart was longer and there was one more verse. I skipped all that, afraid noone wants to listen to a very long song unless it's the Bolero. Thanks a lot for your comment. I liked how you wrote it!

Originally Posted By: dcuny
Ha! I especially enjoyed the lyrics! laugh
The lead guitar was a bit loud (especially a the beginning), but I'll leave any other comments about the mix to the experts.


Hi David, I had changed the volume of the leadguitar in the mix, but apparently not enough. I repaired it now, combined with what Floyd mentioned about the EQ (not the extra bar at the end). I think it's solved and your ears will not be blown off now (I hope). The idea for these lyrics just came in my head. I liked the idea of these men watching in horror and with jaws dropped to the ground when this old chap enters that building. All kind of fuzz enter their heads etcetera. So a nice image. Thanks for your comment!

Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
A cool tale!! Reminds me of a saying my old friend had: You can't buy friends, but if you have good drugs, you can put down a deposit. This is very well produced and mixed too! Enjoyed!! Take care. Greg


Hi Greg, I think your friend was right about that! I became homeless once and a surgeon I met offered me a huge -empty- house in a city nearby. He and his wife thought of me as their son. This was years ago, but I had that house for almost 5 years, while they lived in Norway! Maybe that's how this story came about (?). Thanks a lot for your comment!

Originally Posted By: Tano Music
Really liked the backed-up vocal during the chorus. Also liked your use of the organ. Excellent mix. Loved the sound. Fun song!


Hi Tano, you mentioned the two things I thought less of in this song. So that is nice to read! Thank you for listening and your comment.

A nice day to all of you,
Hans
Posted By: Leon1 Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/09/20 09:38 PM
Nice one, Hans. Enjoyed the story. Good use of the synth stabs on the chorus and as you say, some tasty lead guitar.
Regards,
Leon
Posted By: Janice & Bud Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/10/20 06:34 PM
Great rocker Hans supported by a very cool and clever lyric.

And your vocal delivered the story with good hard hitting authority.

The RT/RD choice was excellent as was the mix. Good work with the solo RT.

It all shines and especially your humor!


Enjoyed it.

J&B
Posted By: Tangmo Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/10/20 07:36 PM
Ahh... the pains and pleasures of squatting. And renting. And buying too, for that matter. Great rocking groove. You already know I love your vocals. The leads are really tasty. I kinda wish that last one had been given a bit more room to breathe. Maybe too abrupt an ending, but then again--I just imagine the wine has run out and so has your tolerance. That's my "artistic interpretation". A lot of fun listening.
Posted By: MarioD Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/10/20 09:05 PM
This is a super rocker. Loved those synth stabs. Your vocal is really strong and those lyrics were fantastic.

I didn't think the guitar lead was too loud.
But I'm a guitarist and everybody knows that a guitarist has to be loud during a lead whistle
Posted By: Rustyspoon# Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/10/20 09:45 PM
Hello Hans,
Strong composition and that nice solo! Vocal performance is great and sits well "in" the mix, but a bit high on EQ.
If you are up for the test, just bring that high band curve down, like good 25-35% (not 5%) on vocals only and post it 2 versions side by side to see what "common" ear of a few listeners will tell you. In any case, it is a good solid tune with a lot of drive, effective style changes from Rock to Funk and well thought out musical elements. Fun lyrics @ rhyme! Thank you for sharing.

Misha.
Posted By: Deej56 Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/10/20 09:45 PM
Hans,

Good sound to this one, strong blues like rhythm. Love those synth chops—adds some nice flavor. Agrees with Floyd the vocal is a little high end in spots; and I think that lead guitar lick in the opening can come down in volume just a tad. Love that guitar solo at the 2:40 or so mark. Ambitious production but you were up to the challenge.

I had read Dave’s comment about the ending being too abrupt before getting there . . . I thought it worked as is, but certainly worth trying his suggestion.

Good work on this, Hans!

Hope all is well with you,

Deej
Posted By: Will Josef Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/10/20 10:26 PM
There is something about this track I really liked and enjoyed, but the guitar solo felt a bit like it was not in the same room as the rest of the band (especially in the beginning)... Anyway.. some good ideas in this track. Keep up the good work!

Will
Posted By: rayc Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/12/20 03:44 AM
EXCELLENT chorus.
the processing on your voice blurs it a little bit and accentuates some of the more strident frequencies.
Tame that & you'll have something that will reward repeated listening.
Posted By: jannesan Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/12/20 02:17 PM
Good stories have usually a catch, and here you have told it in a nice way so that the listener keeps waiting for it. And yes, the twist makes me smile. Your strong voice carries the story very well.

Strong rock groove with nicely mixed guitars supporting the enjoyable chord progression and catchy chorus. It is also great idea to let guitars rest for a while and bass and organ take the lead, gives nice dynamic to the arrangement. Synth hits and solo guitarist are also very good instrument selections. Very good use of holds, although the ending hold is perhaps not perfect, but on the other hand, I like imperfection smile

Janne
Posted By: Ezekiel's Storm Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/12/20 08:36 PM
I enjoyed the humor in the lyrics.

The chorus is a real standout for me.
Posted By: Birchwood Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/13/20 06:34 AM
Originally Posted By: BlueAttitude
Yeah! Great groove. Good vocal, nice solo.

Starting from 3:30 to the end of the song .... loved it! Ending seems a bit abrupt, I wonder if you could extend that last chord so it dies out naturally?

But yeah, good song, Hans.


Hi Dave, I've examined the file again and discovered the last bars were missing. And I completely missed that. Don't know how this happend, but it is solved now. sorry I told you before this would be difficult. I think it was some error in logic Pro (?). Also the eq-problem (as Floyd mentioned is repaired more properly, I think.
Posted By: Birchwood Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/13/20 07:32 AM
Originally Posted By: Leon1
Nice one, Hans. Enjoyed the story. Good use of the synth stabs on the chorus and as you say, some tasty lead guitar.
Regards,
Leon


Hi Leon, thanks for your nice comment!

Originally Posted By: Janice & Bud
Great rocker Hans supported by a very cool and clever lyric.
And your vocal delivered the story with good hard hitting authority.
The RT/RD choice was excellent as was the mix. Good work with the solo RT.
It all shines and especially your humor!

Enjoyed it.
J&B


Hi J&B, you wrote nice words about the song. Thanks very much! I hope humor stays welcome these days. I was thinking if I could offend someone with the subject. People become more sensitive these days. But then decided not to tell about the hidden message in this song ;-) and call it humor. But I noticed you always write so kind and never mention something 'bad', like the sibilance or the abrupt ending. But I don't mind if you do. I am still learning song making, mixing and mastering. All comment is therefor welcome.


Originally Posted By: Tangmo
Ahh... the pains and pleasures of squatting. And renting. And buying too, for that matter. Great rocking groove. You already know I love your vocals. The leads are really tasty. I kinda wish that last one had been given a bit more room to breathe. Maybe too abrupt an ending, but then again--I just imagine the wine has run out and so has your tolerance. That's my "artistic interpretation". A lot of fun listening.


Hi Tangmo, it is a nice feeling when seeing people start fantasizing about the subject and make their own story with it. Starting with draw renting and buying equal to squatting! And more! The part where wine begins playing an important role in accepting people. You did both! I expect a song from your hand where this is all at hand. I will help you, if you want. But when reading your post I doubt if you need my support! Thanks for your nice and funny remarks!
Originally Posted By: MarioD
This is a super rocker. Loved those synth stabs. Your vocal is really strong and those lyrics were fantastic.


Originally Posted By: MarioD
This is a super rocker. Loved those synth stabs. Your vocal is really strong and those lyrics were fantastic.
I didn't think the guitar lead was too loud.
But I'm a guitarist and everybody knows that a guitarist has to be loud during a lead whistle


Hello Mario, I'm afraid your and my ears have had their best times. The guitar was indeed too loud, the sibilance was too much and the ending was an error. But I appreciated you not mentioned this at all. I think we can get along real good, don't you? you like wine?

Originally Posted By: Rustyspoon#
Hello Hans,
Strong composition and that nice solo! Vocal performance is great and sits well "in" the mix, but a bit high on EQ.
If you are up for the test, just bring that high band curve down, like good 25-35% (not 5%) on vocals only and post it 2 versions side by side to see what "common" ear of a few listeners will tell you. In any case, it is a good solid tune with a lot of drive, effective style changes from Rock to Funk and well thought out musical elements. Fun lyrics @ rhyme! Thank you for sharing.

Misha.


Hi Misha, sometimes I wished we had continued our 'private' conversations on EQ-ing. I turned every knob down on the eq, but that didn't do much. I figured out I have created sibilance somewhere on the way in the mix or mastering proces. Hope I can find it without killing my songs. I now corrected some things and added an Izothope D-esser at the last position of the plugin chain in the masteringproces. It feels it sounds better now, so I uploaded it to SoundCloud. Thanks a lot for your advise and kind comment!

Stay save everyone!
Hans
Posted By: Scott C Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/13/20 06:01 PM
Cool way to fire up your song. Very cool vocal Hans. Raspy. Loved the backtrack and the guitars were excellent Well done
Posted By: Birchwood Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/20/20 10:11 AM
Originally Posted By: Deej56
Hans,
Good sound to this one, strong blues like rhythm. Love those synth chops—adds some nice flavor. Agrees with Floyd the vocal is a little high end in spots; and I think that lead guitar lick in the opening can come down in volume just a tad. Love that guitar solo at the 2:40 or so mark. Ambitious production but you were up to the challenge.

I had read Dave’s comment about the ending being too abrupt before getting there . . . I thought it worked as is, but certainly worth trying his suggestion.
Good work on this, Hans!

Hope all is well with you,
Deej


Hi Deej, I was away for some days, so sorry for the delay in my response to you.
But before I went off, I did al you, Floyd, Dave, Misha and Ray wrote about the 'hot' vocals, the lead and the abrupt ending.
I think it is allright by now, because Ray (the last post) made no comment on those issues.
And the abrupt ending was a mistake I made, but hadn't noticed as such. So I thought it wouldn't be so easy adding a bar, as Dave suggested. But it was, after all.

Originally Posted By: Will Josef
There is something about this track I really liked and enjoyed, but the guitar solo felt a bit like it was not in the same room as the rest of the band (especially in the beginning)... Anyway.. some good ideas in this track. Keep up the good work!

Will


Hi Will, thanks for listening. I have to admit I couldn't fix what you wrote about. It is not that I didn't want to, but I didn't hear what you said. I always work with 3 different kind of reverbs, for the vocals, the percussion and the other instruments. And of course that sometimes differs. So here it was the same kind of reverb for all instruments. But explain what you hear, or where you here it.
Anyway, thanks a lot for your comments on the song. I appreciated it!

Originally Posted By: rayc
EXCELLENT chorus.
the processing on your voice blurs it a little bit and accentuates some of the more strident frequencies.
Tame that & you'll have something that will reward repeated listening.


Hello Ray, I think I solved the blurriness, although I didn't notice it was there. So how I fixed it? Just mixed everything again and the eq almost to zero on the vocals (joking a bit)
But I was very fond with your first line, Ray! Still I am afraid a repeated listening of that song was not what I experienced. I than took a bottle of wine in my fists...

Originally Posted By: jannesan
Good stories have usually a catch, and here you have told it in a nice way so that the listener keeps waiting for it. And yes, the twist makes me smile. Your strong voice carries the story very well.

Strong rock groove with nicely mixed guitars supporting the enjoyable chord progression and catchy chorus. It is also great idea to let guitars rest for a while and bass and organ take the lead, gives nice dynamic to the arrangement. Synth hits and solo guitarist are also very good instrument selections. Very good use of holds, although the ending hold is perhaps not perfect, but on the other hand, I like imperfection smile

Janne


Hi Janne, thanks a lot for your nice comment on the song. I almost saw you smiling! I think you must have heard the version where all the complains of the others were -nearly- solved. Otherwise you probably would have supported them, oor you are just too kind for that...

Originally Posted By: Ezekiel's Storm
I enjoyed the humor in the lyrics.

The chorus is a real standout for me.


Hello Ezekiel, thanks for this nice comment. i like adding some humor in lyrics if I have the change for it. Sometimes the topic can't bear it, but this one does!

Thank you all for your comments. I have learned from and enjoyed them!
Hans
Posted By: Birchwood Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/20/20 10:12 AM
Originally Posted By: Scott C
Cool way to fire up your song. Very cool vocal Hans. Raspy. Loved the backtrack and the guitars were excellent Well done


Hi Scott, thanks for this comment! Next song will be more serious...

Hans
Posted By: Al-David Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/20/20 04:03 PM
Hello Hans ...

Terrific rocker! Great production and delivery! I agree with the others on the stabs ... real nice for accenting the punch of the song. Your arranging and production get better all the time ... and they were pretty dang good to start with. I'm okay as an arranger, I suppose, but my arranging is still substantially lacking. I need to work on it more. Your efforts have certainly paid off!

I do agree that you sometimes use a little more higher EQ than what is ideal. Other than that ... you do a terrific job with your music. It's always a good listen!

Best to you. Be safe ...

Alan
Posted By: Birchwood Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/22/20 06:36 AM
Hello Alan,

Thanks for your nice words. Now I hope I don't become too vain.
But that EQ-thing will prevent me to. I thought I handled this issue by now, but now you mentioned it also.
Well, I posted another song by now. I turned every eq knob I could find to almost zero. So maybe...

But thanks a lot!

Hans
Posted By: PeterF Re: Who tells him, a rocky song - 08/22/20 08:45 PM
Hans

Lot's of deserved praise for an excellent rocking song.

Enjoyed, and I think it's one of your strongest offerings.

Peter
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