PG Music Home
Posted By: Deej56 The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 10/21/20 10:24 PM
HI, all:

Here’s a first time collaboration with TuneMonger, who penned the lyrics. First off, much thanks to Tune for his patience with me on this one . . . and more so for his many listens and thoughtful feedback along the way. I’m sure he’s as sick of listening to this as I am by now. smirk Truly, he was a pleasure to work with!

With regard to the tune, I’m certain there’s much in the mix that needs fine-tuning, but I find when I’m at that point where I’m fiddling with no specific purpose and at risk of mucking it up all the more, it’s time to let it go, warts and all. I hope you enjoy it nonetheless. A little bit more of an ambitious arrangement and different sound (for me at least), which made it fun to do. We hope you enjoy it!

Here’s the song:

THE MOON HAS LOST ITS GLOW

Here are the lyrics:

Moonlight was my whole world,
swaying to Glenn Miller,
then her hair came uncurled
when I had hoped to thrill her.
It’s hard to face the night I know;
who needs all the extra woe—
it seems the moon has lost its glow.

Ain’t no say or play about it,
love just hit the rocks—
all its pieces fit
on display within a box.
It’s hard to face the night I know;
who needs all the extra woe—
just seems the moon has lost its glow.

Well, it seems the moon has lost its glow;
city lights lost power.
Where's a couple gonna go
when he wants a chance to wow her?
Well, it's hard to face the night I know;
who needs all the extra woe—
just seems the moon has lost its glow.

I spend my nights in neon bars
where shadows hide the lonely.
But it covers up all my scars,
so here's my number, phone me.
Yeah, it's hard to face the night I know;
who needs all the extra woe—
just seems the moon has lost its glow.

How many fell in love by moonlight?
How many wished upon a star?
Where in the world is my true love so right?
Why does she seem to be so very far?

That clarinet blew oh so sweet,
everyone got up to dance.
What a brilliant way to meet;
what a moment, what a chance.
But I'm alone and very low.
It seems the moon has lost its glow.
It could be me, alright, I know—
Am I the only one with woe?
Yes, it's hard to face the night I know;
who needs all the extra woe—
it seems the moon has lost its glow.

And here’s the band:

RealTracks 519: Bass, Electric, Pop HalfNotes Ev 120
RealTracks 884: Guitar, Electric, Rhythm TexasBluesRockLowA-B Ev 165
RealTracks 882: Guitar, Electric, Rhythm TexasBluesRockHighOffbeat Ev 165
RealTracks 502: Electric, Rhythm, StoneZ Honky
RealTracks 2151: Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm NewOrleansBoogieKevin Ev 165
RealTracks 715: Sax, Tenor, Soloist Rock Boogie Ev 160
RealTracks 686: Organ, B3, Background Pop Ev 120
RealTracks 1967: Clarinet, Soloist DixielandMediumA-B Sw 110 (Bluesy)
RealDrums: NashvilleEven8^8-a:Snare, HiHat Open , b:Snare, Ride
Very cool collaboration. Another super vocal and loved the lyric. Excellent backtrack. Loved the bass runs and the drums were perfect.
Wow! A big production. Great 50s Rock and Roll swing. Great lyrics. Nice recording. Good job to both of you. Well done.
Posted By: Leon1 Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 10/22/20 03:02 AM
Excellent collaboration, guys. Big, toe-tapping sound, super vocal performance. Much enjoyed.
Regards,
Leon
Posted By: rayc Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 10/22/20 08:30 AM
Big.
It's a strange melange of sounds but it works a treat.
As always a melody with your voice is always going to sound cool.
TuneMonger's rhyming of woe is a treat too- nice narrative.
Really enjoyed this - it has a uniqueness to that I found appeal, and the lyrics are top notch. Love the groove as well and thought the vocals were delivered well. Thanks for sharing smile
Deej & TM,

A lot of good things happening here.

The lyrics are colorful and unique, original.

The BAND is full and Rockin'. The piano and sax are notable.

The vocal is energetic and powerful. Lively.

All good stuff. But, I thought there was a real disconnect between the lyric verbiage/story and the music. I listened several times to "give it a chance" and I just couldn't get over the they-don't-work-together feeling. I'm obviously an outlier in that regard - everyone else seems to love the combination.
The mix was good level-wise and instrument-wise, but to my ear (on detailed speakers) it was overly bright-EQ'd. The piano brightness was good to help it cut through the mix, but the rhythm guitar was bright, too, so there was a lack of "balance" there. And the sax had a "brightness" as well. All that brightness competed with the vocal (which had an excellent tone - the right amount of "bright").

Good to see you guys hook up - both talented music makers.

fj
Nice to have a collaborating partner.

I'm torn.
On one hand, the massive instrumentation with the vocal bouncing around on top of it, kept me listening.
On the flip side, I have to agree with FJ, there's not much tonal separation making it a little harsh listening.

I fully understand the mixing fatigue that can cause unnecessary adjustments.
Stick with it.
My recommendation is, find a few good reference tracks with the same vibe and try some critical listening against those to guide any improvements.
Posted By: Deej56 Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 10/22/20 12:32 PM
Hi, all:

Thanks all for the listen and thoughts.

A quick comment here on the mix based on the feedback above. I just went back into my DAW and realized that either I had never EQ'd the guitars and sax or somewhere along the line the program dropped it. I'd like to blame the latter however unlikely, but it's more likely an oversight on my part. I'll see what I can do to tone down the brightness a bit more on the guitars and sax, which might help address some of the concerns above.

Unfortunately, I can't do much to address Floyd's other feedback regarding the style of music relative to the lyric . . . just they way I went with it, and that lies with me, not TuneMonger. I'm happy enough with the combination, but appreciate Floyd's thoughts and reaction.

I'll circle back shortly with, hopefully, a slightly better mix, if my limited skills can pull it off.

Deej
Deej, I can see you've been hard at work. I love the 50s upbeat swing sound. I do agree doesn't exactly match the lyrics which seem to be brooding and sort of sad, so a slower more moody match would have told the story better IMHO. An Andy Williams or Frank Sinatra crooner style.

However, I thought it would have been interesting to have the verses tell the lost my lover story with a slow, moody type sound and then the chorus, amp it up with a but I'm so glad she's gone and I don't care if the moon lost it's glow, let's party.

Would be a lot of contrast there. But great job you both, the lyrics are well written and interesting and your music is still a good song and production. I do agree with Floyd, just doesn't mesh well with the lyrics.
Deej & Tunemonger,
The storyline is fun and well developed with those cute rhymes, like these:

I spend my nights in neon bars
where shadows hide the lonely.
But it covers up all my scars,
so here's my number, phone me.

The pace of the song had me listening close to keep up, but you sing with great energy and clarity.
You already have lots of feedback on the mix; I enjoyed this as is and will be interested to hear a redo if that`s where you take it.

Robert
Posted By: Deej56 Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 10/22/20 02:37 PM
Scott, jpt3, rayc, Deryk, Floyd, CaptainMoto, Belladonna, and Robert:

Thanks again, all, for the listen and great feedback. More to my note above, I've jumped in and done a "quick" EQ fix on the guitars and sax, and a few other minor adjustments. The link should go to the tweaked version. I'm not sure that's made a great difference, but hopefully better. Quite frankly, I need to step away from the mix at this point and come back at it with fresh ears in a week or so.

Floyd and Belladonna,

Appreciate the thoughts on the lyric/music match. The bones of it is what I came up with when I picked up the guitar--and, again, that choice was mine, not Tune's. I'm hopeful it works for most . . . but, if not, then if nothing else we have a great lyric looking for some musical backing, and some musical backing in search of a lyric. And that's something, at least, LOL! smile Again, appreciate the honesty.

My best to you all,

Deej
Posted By: Bawb Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 10/22/20 02:45 PM
Hi Deej56,

When I saw the lyrics "Glenn Miller", I wasn't expecting this song to be such a rocker! The sax added in kind of hints at Glenn Miller Band at times.

You've got a fun arrangement with that cool break.

At times, it kind of reminds me of a Sha-Na-Na song, especially with the piano and sax playing at the same time.

I can't really pin down the era, but at this point, it don't matter. Good music is good music and brother, this is a cool rockin tune. Good vocals and nice write.
Hi Deej & Tunemonger,

great collab. Couldn't keep my feet from tapping. Good sound, good vocals. A real, real, real good lisen!

Cheers,

Stefan
Deeej & TuneMonger, this is a very cool collab. Man, those lyrics are sooo good. What a wonderful production, and use of instruments. Excellent voice, and I know what you mean about mix fatigue, Deej.
I just want to say I'm really happy with how the song turned out. Deej involved me throughout, even though I was just the lyricist. I heard it when it was just his voice and an acoustic guitar, all the way to the final production and was thrilled with it. I still am. It was a fantastic experience collaborating with a talent like Deej and I would do it again in a heartbeat.
Good song, guys!

TuneMonger certainly has some seriously good writing chops, and I thought you did a good job bringing the words to life with the music you created.

Enjoyed.
Good job! Deej's writing, voice, the brilliant lyrics by Tunemonger and that PG Music piano in the background make this song, for me. Not to forget Deej's interpretation with a good dollop of a sense of a humour in it! By the last stanza, I was actually dancing (attempting to, at least). That stanza took it to the level before and then some :-)

On my second listen, now - but, if I may be allowed to say this, this is vintage Deej. One of his best - making the very best of these great lyrics. Bravo to both!!!
Fun song!! Clever, fun lyric and a nice upbeat musical accompaniment!! Really cool collab guys!! Take care. Greg
We liked the juxtaposing of big band era references set to a rock groove.

The story line is timeless ... dancing to a big band or rock. And DJ put his rock
vocal stamp on it big time. Great collab.

That number of tracks is above my mixing pay grade but it all laid out well on the monitors.

TM said, "Deej involved me throughout, even though I was just the lyricist." Well that "even though"
is a huge part of the song. There are a lot of folks who would love to be just the lyricist if they
could write like you.

Good one y'all!

J&B
Posted By: Deej56 Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 11/01/20 01:04 AM
Bawb, Stefan, Marty, Dave, musician17, Greg and J&B:

Thanks fo much for the listens on this one. It was a lot of fun to do—something a bit different and certainly challenging. I still haven’t worked up the courage to go back in and try a remix, LOL! But hopefully the few changes I made earlier took some of the brightness out of the original post.

J&B: The number of tracks is a bit deceiving . . . the organ and stonez electric guitar really just make cameos, and of course the clarinet doesn’t come in until the very end (and I think I fade it out early in the outro.

My very best to you each—stay safe, stay well!

Deej
Hello Deej66,

Very catchy composition on sentimental lyrics from bygone times. It is pleasant to listen to and your voice is well balanced compared to the musical arrangement.

Best regard

Dero13
alias JaniJackFlash
Posted By: MarioD Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 11/01/20 06:45 PM
I like this rocker. I thought that the lyrics and the 50's groove worked well together. I liked your vocal, lyrics, backing tracks, and mix.

To nitpick I thought that at times the piano was a tad to loud when you were singing, making it a little difficult to clearly hear you. This is a small nitpick but one IMHO would make this really shine. Regardless this is a really good song.
Great song! Really like the lyrics.
Definitely a fun old school rocker. You are the creator, the one with the vision. so take the music where you want with the lyrics. It's fun to experiment.
Deej & TM ...

I like it! Indeed, a bit of an unexpected mix of lyric and band ... but very enjoyable. I'm coming late and you've already made some mixing adjustments, so I cannot compare this to the original post. I liked this a lot. Perhaps the piano is a bit too forward but that certainly didn't dilute the listening pleasure.

Two talented song creators and one terrific song. Works for me! I always do a lot of experimenting and have some odd mixes I;ve never posted. But it's a lot of fun cruising the various BIAB hallways to see what's behind the various doors. It's your song ... do it your way!

Wishing you both he very best ... be safe.

Alan
Hi guys, this one seemed to start coming together for me at around 2:00. Deej, you always do a great job with the vocals! Nice collaboration! The fade out was a good choice! Thanks, T
Posted By: F.M.M. Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 11/05/20 11:22 AM
Hi Deej56 love the vocals great Collab great job thanks Eric
Posted By: Deej56 Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 11/06/20 01:40 AM
Dero, Alexander, Mario, Ezekial, Al, Torrey and F.M.M.:

Thanks so much for the listens. Really glad you all seemed to enjoy it. As I referenced above, a challenging mix for a guy of my limited talents. Seems the piano being to forward is a common theme I'll have to think about. I knew early on, when I stumbled on the Piano RT for this one, I really wanted it to carry the song and be the centerpiece. Perhaps I clung to that a little too much. At some point, I'll revisit this . . . your feedback is very helpful.

My best to each of you,

Deej
Deej & TuneMonger,
Fun collaboration. Solid rocker with semi-vintage vibe. Excellent vocals. Mix sounds good to my ears. Thank you for sharing!

Misha.
Posted By: Deej56 Re: The Moon Has Lost Its Glow (w/TuneMonger) - 11/13/20 02:41 AM
Misha,

Thanks for the listen and kind comments. Glad you enjoyed the spin!

Regards,

Deej
© PG Music Forums