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Posted By: Robertkc Song of the Old - 05/18/21 07:16 PM

Seems to this oldster just starting out, that there are lots of upsides to ageing; you get more time if you`re lucky for creativity, idiosyncrasies are forgivable, you are hopefully a little streetwiser...that`s a song I might write, and will be more cheerful than this, which was written partly in a dream.

Song of the Old


Style is _PEACE.STY (Peacefully Stringed Ballad)

RealTracks in style: ~2482:Bass, Acoustic, Bowed Held Ev 085
RealTracks in style: 2820:Harp, Rhythm ClassicalSlow8ths Ev 085
RealTracks in song: 2870:Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm CelticAirDave Ev 085
RealTracks in style: 2335:String Quartet, Rhythm PopHall Ev 085
RT3267 cello RT 1856 cello



Song of the Old


will you write the song of the old
the way it really is
the innocence of a shy melody
the awkwardness of silences
it hurts too much to behold
will you write the song of the old

I dreamt you had fallen
you couldn`t stand
strangers taking
the ship you made with your hands

will you write the song of a child
the way it really is
with so many wise almost words
sung in uncertain voices
by a rhyme the heart is beguiled
will you write the song of a child

seeing you now
through curtains of then
floating your boat for beginnings
shaking a stick at the end
only a child can write the song of the old

will you write the song of the old
the way it really is
the way it really is


© Robert Cordrey April 2020
Posted By: Rustyspoon# Re: Song of the Old - 05/18/21 11:20 PM
Robert,
beautiful harmonies!
Deep subject. Poetry and delivery are amazing!

"seeing you now
through curtains of then"

"only a child can write the song of the old"

Excellent!

Very good mix. A nice step back, an "exhale" from more complex and busy compositions.
Thank you for sharing.

Misha.
Posted By: BlueAttitude Re: Song of the Old - 05/19/21 06:45 AM
Robert, this is wonderful!

Man, that vocal ... so vulnerable! Great job on the harmonies too.

I like your instrument choices, and the mix sounds great through the 'phones.

Enjoyed my listens!
Posted By: rsdean Re: Song of the Old - 05/19/21 06:59 AM
Robert,

Complex and beautiful...

A stunning song and vocal. You are one of my favorites here on the forum.

Love the track selection as well - perfectly frames the song.

"I dreamt you had fallen
you couldn`t stand
strangers taking
the ship you made with your hands"

Outstanding lyrics...

Bob
Posted By: AudioTrack Re: Song of the Old - 05/19/21 08:44 AM
Sometimes when you write a Song of the Old, your are unwittingly writing a Song of the New.

The delicacy of this delivery is no exception.
Posted By: floyd jane Re: Song of the Old - 05/19/21 11:33 AM
Robert,

Really enjoyed this.

Nice write.

"with so many wise almost words
sung in uncertain voices"

"by a rhyme the heart is beguiled
will you write the song of a child"

...my favorite lines.

Excellent production. The tracks carry the song perfectly.

Your vocal is a delight. Smooth, comfortable (an important quality), heartfelt. And excellent harmonies.

Really well done.

fj
Posted By: Scott C Re: Song of the Old - 05/19/21 05:03 PM
Very nice Robert the cello and piano sound very nice together. Excellent vocal and harmonies. Well done
Posted By: musician17 Re: Song of the Old - 05/19/21 07:08 PM
Oh WOW.

The lyrics. Your vibrato. The LYRICS. The music and the performance of it.

One of the very, very best songs I've ever heard on here, by far.

Still shaking.

Bravo, standing ovation, hats off. SUPERB song.
Posted By: BabuMusic Re: Song of the Old - 05/20/21 09:55 AM
I was quite happy with the song right from the beginning, then WOW those harmonies grabbed the proverbial ladder and brought it to magical heights, Robert. Outstanding vocals and a brilliant song idea. I also like the one you suggested about the upside of aging.
Posted By: Robertkc Re: Song of the Old - 05/20/21 01:49 PM
Originally Posted By: Rustyspoon#
Robert,
beautiful harmonies!
Deep subject. Poetry and delivery are amazing!

"seeing you now
through curtains of then"

"only a child can write the song of the old"

Excellent!

Very good mix. A nice step back, an "exhale" from more complex and busy compositions.
Thank you for sharing.

Misha.



Misha,
Very kind comments- thank you!


Originally Posted By: BlueAttitude
Robert, this is wonderful!

Man, that vocal ... so vulnerable! Great job on the harmonies too.

I like your instrument choices, and the mix sounds great through the 'phones.

Enjoyed my listens!


Thanks Dave,
I appreciate your comments- especially on the vocal as I recorded in other keys before
settling on this version.

Originally Posted By: rsdean
Robert,

Complex and beautiful...

A stunning song and vocal. You are one of my favorites here on the forum.

Love the track selection as well - perfectly frames the song.

"I dreamt you had fallen
you couldn`t stand
strangers taking
the ship you made with your hands"

Outstanding lyrics...

Bob


Bob,
Having sat on this one for several years trying to get the chorus melody & harmonies right its very encouraging to read such supportive comments; thank you!

Originally Posted By: VideoTrack
Sometimes when you write a Song of the Old, your are unwittingly writing a Song of the New.

The delicacy of this delivery is no exception.



I appreciate your listen and positive thoughts.


Robert
Posted By: David Snyder Re: Song of the Old - 05/20/21 02:55 PM

This is beautiful Robert.
Posted By: Derochette Re: Song of the Old - 05/20/21 03:58 PM
Hi Robertkc,

Very soft song from your lyrics as well as from your very soft musical accompaniment. The second voice is very well placed. The quarted strings works wonderfully.Well done.I appreciated.

Kindly regard
Derochette
alias JaniJackFlash
Posted By: Leon1 Re: Song of the Old - 05/20/21 09:03 PM
My heart was beguiled by this one. Beautiful work, Robert.
Regards,
Leon
Posted By: rayc Re: Song of the Old - 05/20/21 09:08 PM
The arrangement holds your voice at its center really well.
Sensitive lyric, sensitive rendition, sensitive topic - all done really well.
There's a little proximity effect on the vocal in spots but that's to be expected for such an intimate vocal.
Posted By: jptjptjpt Re: Song of the Old - 05/20/21 11:22 PM
A very bitter-sweet song. Lovely vocals. You found a beautiful melody. Nice music by the band. I like it.
Posted By: dcuny Re: Song of the Old - 05/21/21 02:37 AM
Starting with cello and piano hooks me in, and you're pleading lyrics match your voice. Nice harmonies! This shift to the minor chord works nicely, and the strings in the background is very cool. The voice and cello weave together, with the strings giving a lift.

Soft and sad. Nice write as well! laugh
Posted By: Noel96 Re: Song of the Old - 05/22/21 05:25 AM
Hi Robert,

This is truly splendid listening.

I love the ambience you create with your backing and your singing. I'm just trying to think of how to describe the effect you had on me but I can't. Words that popped into my mind included: wonderful, mystical, nostalgic, reminiscing, haunting, fragile, tender. Maybe these words are sufficient to give you some insight into the impact your song had on me. I hope so.

I really loved the harmonies.

You've made something very special here.

All the best,
Noel
Posted By: Robertkc Re: Song of the Old - 05/23/21 02:29 PM
Originally Posted By: floyd jane
Robert,

Really enjoyed this.

Nice write.

"with so many wise almost words
sung in uncertain voices"

"by a rhyme the heart is beguiled
will you write the song of a child"

...my favorite lines.

Excellent production. The tracks carry the song perfectly.

Your vocal is a delight. Smooth, comfortable (an important quality), heartfelt. And excellent harmonies.

Really well done.

fj


Really appreciate that, Floyd; I dithered on the vocal for a while, wondering if it conveyed too much emotion, so its good to read your endorsement.



Originally Posted By: Scott C
Very nice Robert the cello and piano sound very nice together. Excellent vocal and harmonies. Well done


Thanks Buddy!

Originally Posted By: musician17
Oh WOW.

The lyrics. Your vibrato. The LYRICS. The music and the performance of it.

One of the very, very best songs I've ever heard on here, by far.

Still shaking.

Bravo, standing ovation, hats off. SUPERB song.





James,
You have been extremely generous in your appreciation once again...maybe we all need at least one listener to "get" the feeling our songs are intended to convey in order to keep going at the craft; thank you very much;your comments mean a great deal to me.



Originally Posted By: BabuMusic
I was quite happy with the song right from the beginning, then WOW those harmonies grabbed the proverbial ladder and brought it to magical heights, Robert. Outstanding vocals and a brilliant song idea. I also like the one you suggested about the upside of aging.


Marty,
Thanks! I`ll keep my notes on that "upsides of ageing" song and see what happens.

Originally Posted By: David Snyder

This is beautiful Robert.


Thank you for listening David.
Posted By: bluage Re: Song of the Old - 05/23/21 04:30 PM
Dear 'Robertkc'...

Imaginatively observed narrative, wistful in feeling and tone, sensitively and warmly orchestrated, and sung as though each word of the lyrics were composed one day at a time throughout the long, eventful life of the song's subject.
Posted By: Janice & Bud Re: Song of the Old - 05/25/21 05:32 PM
"seeing you now
through curtains of then
floating your boat for beginnings
shaking a stick at the end
only a child can write the song of the old"

The entire package is very poignant but the above really sums it up. Your tender vocal, the harmonies, the cello and piano all work so well together to create this all too "real life" imagery.

"by a rhyme the heart is beguiled"

That line is powerful and so true and you are a great poet indeed!

Excellent!

J&B
Posted By: Robertkc Re: Song of the Old - 05/26/21 01:17 PM
Originally Posted By: Derochette
Hi Robertkc,

Very soft song from your lyrics as well as from your very soft musical accompaniment. The second voice is very well placed. The quarted strings works wonderfully.Well done.I appreciated.

Kindly regard
Derochette
alias JaniJackFlash


Thanks, Derochette; I like the RT quartet strings; with a little thickening they do the job... now if only I had your MIDI skills.


Originally Posted By: Leon1
My heart was beguiled by this one. Beautiful work, Robert.
Regards,
Leon


Leon,
That`s very kind- thank you!

Originally Posted By: rayc
The arrangement holds your voice at its center really well.
Sensitive lyric, sensitive rendition, sensitive topic - all done really well.
There's a little proximity effect on the vocal in spots but that's to be expected for such an intimate vocal.


Ray,
I appreciate those comments; those more delicate vocal lines I had to sing close or risk fading away!

Originally Posted By: jptjptjpt
A very bitter-sweet song. Lovely vocals. You found a beautiful melody. Nice music by the band. I like it.


Thank you for listening and liking.

Originally Posted By: dcuny
Starting with cello and piano hooks me in, and you're pleading lyrics match your voice. Nice harmonies! This shift to the minor chord works nicely, and the strings in the background is very cool. The voice and cello weave together, with the strings giving a lift.

Soft and sad. Nice write as well! laugh



David,
Its good to hear you approve of the arrangement and mix; thankyou!


Robert
Posted By: PeterF Re: Song of the Old - 05/27/21 08:21 PM
Robert

Beautiful, poetic and moving.

Some of your very best vocals and harmonies.

Just lovely.

Peter
Posted By: MarioD Re: Song of the Old - 05/27/21 08:49 PM
WOW! Robert this is your best to date! Loved the vocal and lyrics. The harmonies and the chord progression is absolutely brilliant. The instrumentation was spot on.

Great work.
Posted By: Ezekiel's Storm Re: Song of the Old - 05/27/21 08:57 PM
Beautiful melody. Beautiful lyrics.

Vocal performance conveys the emotion of the words.

I love the instrumentation. Nice fit.

I agree with Mario: One of your best.
Posted By: TuneMonger Re: Song of the Old - 06/01/21 02:55 AM
Beautiful, laconic words and melody. Can't beat it. Listened several times.
Posted By: Al-David Re: Song of the Old - 06/01/21 03:21 AM
Innocent, touching, and delicate. Everyone before me has said everything that popped into my head as I listened. The lyric is just so good. And your vocal mingles with the excellent instrumentation, much as white, puffy clouds do in a sky of blue on a warm spring day.

When the ears hear a song, sends it to the heart, and the heart, in turn, passes it onto the soul, it's a sign of musical majesty. Our soul is the real person we are; and for the listener's soul to embrace it, you know the song is special in so many ways. This is, truly, one of those songs. Thank you for sharing the magic with us.

Alan
Posted By: CaptainMoto Re: Song of the Old - 06/02/21 08:50 PM
Love the vibrato in your vocal.
Quite an insightful message.

well done.

moto
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