Title:The fragile little sparrow

Link: Eleanor Lennox: The fragile little sparrow

Update: The fragile little sparrow (remixed with louder vocals)

A song inspired by the life and early death of Cranberries singer Dolores O'Riordan.
A big thank you to all the forum members who pointed out that my vocal arrangements reminded them a bit of Dolores,
because I started listening to her old stuff again and rediscovered how good she was as a songwriter and singer.

The usual unasked for trivia:

• since all images are copyrighted these days (i.e., there are almost NO free images of Dolores)
  the background images you see in the video are computer-generated anime-style paintings. Not perfect, but kind of usable.
• when I investigated her life, a lot of bad things came up (child abuse, bipolar disorder). Poor girl
• even though I personally prefer more upbeat stuff, a ballad here and there is fun and a welcome change.
• my first attempt at implementing Scott's (Ezekiel's Storm) advice to "say the same thing with fewer words".
  I'm not there yet (sometimes I have trouble saying it at all), but I'm working on it

Special thanks (again) to Marty for proofreading the lyrics and encouraging words. His 'more me' request for the bass player has been implemented.
So if anyone thinks there's too much bass, it's all Marty's fault

Some technical information:
Style: _LURK.STY

The band:
Drums: NashPopBallad
Bass: 1190 (re-amped)
Guitars: 3738, 3435, 840 (all re-amped)
Viola: 2336
Strings and Synths: yours truly
Vocals: Eleanor Lennox with BG vocals from Solaria.

You can find the lyrics in the next post.

Title: Natalie Lennox: The fragile little sparrow

Chorus:
The fragile little sparrow
who flew too high
sang her last song
a song that made me cry

The fragile little sparrow
with broken wings
couldn't carry on
and find her way back home

Verse:
She wasn't meant to fly so high
She had a dream
But she had to pay the price
For flying too high

She was searching for a place to belong
And thought she found it in the sky
But she was wrong
She didn't belong there, no

Chorus:
The fragile little sparrow
who flew too high
sang her last song
a song that made me cry

The fragile little sparrow
with broken dreams
couldn't carry on
and find her way back home
home

Bridge:
She had just a fleeting moment
but in that moment she was free
just free

Chorus:
The fragile little sparrow
who flew too high
sang her last song
a song that made me cry

The fragile little sparrow
with broken dreams
couldn't carry on
and find her way back home

I love the song. It is so sweet and exudes gentleness. For me, the vocals could come up a tad.

Vic

Hi B.D.
Really very nice
A worthy tribute song
Sounds great and the video is very fitting to the song
I find however there is too much bass in the mix... was just a joke ;-)))
All excellent B.D.
Many greetings
Andi ;-)

Hey Vic, thanks for listening and your feedback, I always appreciate it.
The vocals are indeed less loud than usual, but I thought it fits the mood better. Let's wait for some more feedback before I change anything.
Thanks for suggestion

B.D. you are a master of those A.I. vocals.

This sounds real, great work on that.

Nice harmonies!

I think the vocal could come up a tad during the verses. That would make it fit better with the chorus IMHO.

Good song!

Nice echoes of Cranberries-type, both in the vocal and the vocal phrasing.

The vocal is competing with a lot things in the same frequency. In "headphones" mode, the vocal is easy to make out. But just about any other speaker setting, the vocal is a bit too far back. So I suspect you depend a bit too much on stereo separation to make the vocal stand out from the instruments.

Lyrically, you're doing more with less, so kudos with that.

And I can hear you build contrast between the different parts. But I think there's a sameness to the song, so even more contrast of some sort would be helpful.

B.D., very nice song and well produced. I listened on speakers and thought the vocals may be a little low, but not much - it sounded pretty good. I really liked the harmonies you were able to put together. Nice wright too.

Nicely done enjoyed the song and the instruments are well chosen.

I agree the vocals could come up a touch.

Peter

I've had a Cranberries station on Pandora for years and Dolores had such a uniquely beautiful voice. Her light was extinguished far too early; such a tradgedy.

I think you did a great job in the Cranberries style and you did a wonderful job lyrically.

Nice.

A good write.

An interesting BAND.

Coo video.

Well done.

fj

Brian...a very pretty and touching song...I'm still amazed at AI...this song fits it perfectly and your talent in that area is evident...my only nit is that the vocal seemed lost in the mix at the beginning of the song but got better (in terms of volume) as the song went on...I loved the melody of the song...the video was very well done...beautiful!

I really liked this a lot, thought you did a terrific job. The vocal levels were fine for me, but I always use headphones. (Yes, I know, bad for mixing). Great tribute to the source of inspiration. A more intriguing chord progression might've made it more interesting, but I can't say that it would have been better. Probably perfect as is. Great work!

Nice one!
There're a few spots where the phrasing accentuates the synthetic source.
I'm not a Cranberries fan though I do know a couple of their songs & the Dolores story.
You've done a good job.

Thanks for listening and your feedback, Andi.
Greetings back from Germany

Hello Mario (and Vic again),
thanks a lot for your feedback, especially about the vocal levels

I uploaded a remix with the following changes:

• the original mix has only the center guitar ducked by the vocals. The remix does the same (slightly) with both guitars on the sides, so the vocals don't have to compete so much
• the vocals got about 3dB more (slightly less because the compressor took some away)

If you can still stand the song, you can listen to the remixed version here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYvZ_TLzCCk

Hi David,
thanks a lot for listening and your detailed analysis, I really appreciate it!
I checked it again, I think with speakers (as long as they are not too close together) it's still okay-ish, but in mono (which I forgot to check this time ) or when I walk away from the speakers the separation indeed relies too much on a proper stereo setup.

I upped the vocals by about 3dB and ducked the guitars on the sides a bit, the result is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYvZ_TLzCCk

I didn't change the contrast, but I keep that in mind for my next song

Ah, the bass sounds perfect, BD. What a wonderful tribute. I'm not familiar with her, but looked her up after hearing your song. Man, you did a fine job on the images too. The vocals do sound a lot better on the new mix. You may be sending your lyrics to the wrong guy if you want them succinct. I've never been known as one who follows Ben Franklin's advice of "why use two words when one will do." My 8-year-old granddaughter said, "You teach me a lot, Babu. Sometimes I'm afraid to ask." Don'tr listen to her, BD. I enjoy hearing your works in progress.

BDT, it is mind blowing how you get these vocaloids to work so well. I enjoyed the song and the levels of the mix sound perfect to me. Very well written and produced,Tom

I loved the Cranberries music. Vocals and harmonies were just awesome. Lovely lyric and backtrack. Excellent mix. Happy New Year. Well done..

Very beautiful and worthy tribute. Reminds me of Elton John's Candle In The Wind (tribute to Marilyn Monroe) and naturally of Edith Piaf who was called the Little Sparrow.
Excellent work with the lead vocal and the harmonies.
Nice soft band, that fits the ballad style. Especially the guitars create that Cranberries mood, the viola and strings support it well.
Touching video.
I'm looking forward your new songs in 2023 with great interest

Janne

B.D.:

Terrific work here. Very Cranberries feel to it—beautiful harmonies. Just listened to the remix and the vocals sound just right to me. Wonderful to listen to.

Deej

Very nice job, I think she would appreciate you taking the time to do this in her honor. Nice tribute. Thank you for sharing.

Hi BDT - very professional sounding mix, sounds great!!
Very well done, Carl

Thanks Brad and Peter for listening and your feedback, I really appreciate it.

I did a remix where the vocals are a bit louder and ducked the guitars on the left and right side a bit more so they don't compete so much with the vocals.

You can listen to it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYvZ_TLzCCk

Thank you BT for listening and for your kind feedback. Always appreciated

Thanks a lot for listening and your feedback, Floyd.

Thank you Dan for listening and your feedback.
The vocals got some more love, you can listen to the updated version here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYvZ_TLzCCk

"She wasn't meant to fly so high
She had a dream
But she had to pay the price
For flying too high"

Excellent...

A lovely tribute with tender vocals and a gentle sounding band. (We also listened to the remix and it sounds very good.)

We're aware of but not familiar with the Cranberries so now we will enjoy checking out their music.

We see no reason to parse this tune out or focus on the synth ... it simply sounds great.

Well done!

J&B

I listened to your new mix, vocal is sitting right where it should IMHO.

Vocal sounds very good, I'm constantly amazed at what you and a couple of others here have managed to accomplish with that technology.

Well written, enjoyed the listen.

Thanks so much for listening and your nice feedback, Rob.

The funny thing is that I often start with more unusual chord progressions, but as the song develops, I remove this and change that and usually end up with something very simple that works better.
I guess that's why I don't write progressive rock

Thanks Ray, your feedback is always appreciated.

When I'm writing, it's sometimes a difficult decision whether to write what I hear in my head or what suits the singer best. But that's true for real singers too, so I usually don't worry about it too much because I want to get stuff finished.

But I have it in mind for the next song

Thanks Marty, especially for taking the time to compare both versions.

Saying more with fewer words is a learning experience I'm enjoying right now.
I hope to get better with each song (if it fits the song, of course).

Thank you Tom for your feedback on both, the song and the production. Very appreciated!

Thanks so much for listening and your kind feedback, Scott.
Especially from someone familiar with their music. That means a lot to me.

Thanks Janne for listening and your detailed feedback. It took a while to find the right guitars, luckily BIAB offers a lot of them

Sorry this is late. I was on vacation when you posted this and missed it when I returned.

You hit the mark with the lyrics. As someone has mentioned, vocal and phrasing is reminiscent of Delores.

Beautiful song.

I listened to Everyone Else Is Doing It and No Need to Argue incessantly in the 90s, and it drove my wife crazy.

Really sweet, beautiful song.
The vocals are outstanding.
And the video is wonderful.
Great tribute!

Rob and Anne-Marie

Thanks for listening and your nice comment, Deej. Good to have some feedback on the remix.
Very appreciated!

Thank you for listening to my song, Cheryl Anne. Glad you like it

Thanks for listing and your feedback on the mix, Carl. Very appreciated!

B.D.

You have really mastered the use of technology for this brand of pop.

It always sounds very clean, well-mixed and vibrant.

Are you ever going to let us hear the man behind the magic curtain take a turn at the mic???

Thank you Janice & Bud for taking the time to listen to both versions and give me your feedback, I really appreciate it

Thank you for listing and your feedback, Dave. Very appreciated!

Thank you, David. I always appreciate your feedback on my songs.


Possible, but very unlikely.
First, I don't like my (recorded) voice, but what's worse, I have a really terrible German accent when I speak or sing English.
Heck, I even have a terrible accent in my own language, I grew up in the backwoods before I had access to any culture...

B.D.Thomas,

While I'm not familiar with the artist you mentioned, I can only imagine that you honored her memory with this lovely tune! The work with the vocals on this is exceptionally good! Great sounding song!

Thanks, T

Oops, I completely missed your post, Torrey. Sorry about that.

Thanks for taking the time to listen and for your nice feedback, I really appreciate it.

I don't know if you like this kind of music, but if you want to familiarize yourself with the Cranberries, there are some good starting points here:
The Cranberries - Linger
The Cranberries - When You're Gone
(The latter was played at her funeral)