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#297537 - 05/30/15 09:11 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: floyd jane]
Registered: 05/30/08
Posts: 4580
Sundance Offline
Veteran

Registered: 05/30/08
Posts: 4580
+1 What they said. You've got some great funny songs in your repertoire and this one is no exception.

"and the rights to my first born son" LOL!

Totally enjoyed everything about it FJ.

Josie

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#297551 - 05/30/15 11:09 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: floyd jane]
Registered: 05/12/12
Posts: 2615
Loc: South Africa
JoanneCooper Offline
Veteran

Registered: 05/12/12
Posts: 2615
Loc: South Africa
Brilliant! What a great write. I once gave my home address as my car registration number on some form or other so I can definately relate to living in a pawn shop!


Edited by JosieC (05/30/15 11:09 PM)

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#297592 - 05/31/15 06:39 AM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: PatrickH]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Originally Posted By: boehm
Hi Floyd,

again a masterpiece. Everything fits. (And there
are a lot of RTs that had to be puzzled together).
Very entertaining lyrics. I learned two new words
(cot and skill saw). And your vocals delivery
is spot on.
You see me toe tapping while I'm writing this.
Most enjoyable.

Guenter

Guenter - I always appreciate your support - and the nice reviews... One does no see many cots anymore. We had them for camping when I was a kid. Skill saw, I believe comes from the brand name (Skil) much the way we refer to tissue as "Kleenex" ...


Originally Posted By: tommyad
floyd, Once again you have displayed clever wordsmithing. A very fun and enjoyable listen. Great editing . The mix sounds good and the vocal is on point. Anyone who has spent as much time as I have in pawnshops knows that there is much joy in discovering good deals and much sadness in the stories that surround them. Very interesting places indeed for a number of different reasons. Another keeper in your catalogue of good uns. Tom

Thanks, Tom... I went through a "pawnshop phase" - a buddy and I spent hours exploring - though seldom buying - we were broke - but always dreaming of that special items that everyone missed - that we could sell for a small fortune...



Originally Posted By: nobilis
Floyd,

I wish I'd known. I just bought the skill saw. You can use it anytime LOL.

Fun song, love the backgrounds and the nice breaks/kicks towards the end.

HA!, Patrick... hold on to that, I'll need it....

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#297594 - 05/31/15 07:20 AM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: floyd jane]
Registered: 04/20/10
Posts: 4840
Loc: Florida
90 dB Offline
Veteran

Registered: 04/20/10
Posts: 4840
Loc: Florida
The more I hear this, the more I like it. I can relate to the pawn shop. grin







Regards,

Bob

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#297644 - 05/31/15 03:06 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: floyd jane]
Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 8952
Loc: GA USA
Janice & Bud Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 8952
Loc: GA USA
Well, as we say down in South Georgia (USA that is)
"That's stronger than a garlic milkshake!"

When you suggested that "every songwriter
oughta have one" I knew we were in for a treat.
Why, 'cause I knew good and well that if you
took on a theme like that it would be fresh
and inventive. And no disappointments
emerged. Great vocal, great RT's, great
arrangement and mix indeed; but, what we
can't get over is how much powerhouse writing
is packed into this one song. We'd be excited
to conjure up a third of that quality for one
endeavor. If my writing head was that fertile
I'd never stop.

Aw right crank up the broken record "this oughta
be what we hear on country radio. Period
."

J&B

Top
#297762 - 06/01/15 05:44 AM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Originally Posted By: PRADON
Hello Floyd,

In principle I am not the biggest fan of Country music, but I noted some very interesting things in your song : first of all, the orchestration, many instruments and a mix which is very well done ; One other thing that interests me is the voices in the background, is it your voice with reverb or samples?

Have a good day

Thanks, PRADON. The harmonies are me - my typical treatment - I do 2 harmony tracks (both thirds), pan them left and right between 30-50% (depending on the song) and add effects - typically reverb, some eq, delay sometimes - to give them some "space". Simple stuff.


Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
Deliciously humorous!! Crafty and fun. Everything this type of song should be. When I saw the title, I knew it'd be great but I wasn't sure what type of song it was. The last line of the chorus delivers the humorous blow after a great setup. The master is back in town!! Great work Floyd! Take care. Greg

Thanks, Greg... always enjoy your take on a song...


Originally Posted By: JPeden73
Count me among the impressed as well. I'm always amazed by the unexpected lyrics you come up with. Not sure how you do it, but I like it.
Thanks for sharing this.

-Jeff

Thanks, Jeff... appreciate that...

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#297813 - 06/01/15 11:52 AM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: RnAM]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Originally Posted By: Curt Young
Thanks for another great one. A lot of fun, and top notch production all the way around.

Always nice to see you drop in, Curt... thanks for the listen...


Originally Posted By: RnAM
That's quite a list of realtracks used here!
Man, how do you get these mixes so crispy clear, uhm, yes you already explained once...
We are trying to do the same in our recordings, but haven't managed to get this crystal clear audio quality yet.
Anyway, another country song very well done!

Rob

Thanks, Rob.... seems to me that your recordings are very high quality - I'm always impressed...

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#298004 - 06/02/15 02:25 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: Rob4580]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Originally Posted By: SpaceDog
Floyd,
Superb arrangement and performance. Top notch all the way.
SD


Thanks, SD.


Originally Posted By: dcuny
As always, a great song.

But the arrangement and mix were simply stunning - lots of variety, and the licks fit in like they were played just for the part, but never crowded or blocked the lyric.

Amazing.

Thanks, David. I really appreciate that....


Originally Posted By: Rob4580
LOL as soon as I read the title I new this would be great.
Great lyrics and very catchy.
Also great job on the mixing.
Love it.
Rob.

Thanks for your support, Rob....

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#298017 - 06/02/15 03:09 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: floyd jane]
Registered: 07/28/11
Posts: 101
Sonny Ray Offline
Apprentice

Registered: 07/28/11
Posts: 101
Hi Floyd,
Great lyrics; love your mix!
_________________________
Keep on Rockin'
Sonny Ray

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#298129 - 06/03/15 07:19 AM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: HearToLearn]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Noel - I'll come back to you when I have more time (gotta run now)....



Originally Posted By: 90 dB
I don't know about any "rule of two", but I like the song. If it were me,though, I would have left that woman at the pawn shop. grin

Regards, Bob


I've heard you don't play by the rules. smile but always glad when you drop by...



Originally Posted By: HearToLearn
That was really well written. I wish I could give you some advice, but you know what you are doing!

That was a master class in lyric writing!

Thanks for the share!

Caaron - Thanks! What a nice thing to say....

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#298362 - 06/04/15 10:30 AM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: Noel96]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Originally Posted By: Noel96
...click image


HA! Loved the little guy, Noel!


Quote:

What a great musical journey! A terrific drive through the countryside of down-to-earth humour. Scenery, laughs and smiles all the way. And a toe-tapping beat to keep the feet actively involved as well. All wrapped up in a first class arrangement, top notch performance and outstanding production. Excellent stuff!


Your reviews are always music to my ears!.

Quote:

When I first saw the song's title in the forum, I sat looking at it and thinking about it for around 15 minutes. It's one of the most intriguing titles I've ever seen. I was fascinated and I found myself wondering how anyone could use such a title in a song. What theme links a 'pawnshop' to 'that woman'? While vivid images appeared when I thought about either 'pawnshop' or 'that woman', I could not, for the life of me, think of a link between the two that had sufficient potential to create a whole song lyric. I'm envious of your ability to find a song in the most unusual and unexpected places.


Interesting observation, Noel. Finding the IDEA is often the biggest part of writing a (worthwhile) song. Once an idea occurs to you, if you can sort of map out the journey the song will take, quickly in your head, then you know immediately that you have something worth pursuing. If you can't do that, then you will often struggle to make the later parts of the song interesting.

Quote:
I can't remember which song it was but, a while back, I recall commenting on how you used the rhyme scheme found in limericks to complement the emotional journey of a serious song. In “Pawnshop”, you've chosen a different path. You've taken the rhyme technique of a limerick (AABBA) and used it to enhance the effect of comedy.


I don't typically plan structure like that - it simply "occurs" as I write - naturally - it "feels right".

Quote:
...I saw the format and realised how you made me laugh out loud. That was a very clever touch. If it's possible to be a 'Le Cordon Bleu' songwriter, you are definitely one.


LOL - always good to get a chuckle from someone (when it is intended, of course)

Quote:
Steve Seskin


Steve is SUCH a fine writer. "Life's A Dance" was one of my major templates for many years.

Your discussion of form and sequence always fascinates me. Partly because I don't consciously consider it as I write. It is, again, something that generally presents itself as I formulate the idea (journey) of the song - sort of naturally for what the song needs to be based on the subject and the effect that I want to song to achieve.


Quote:

Lastly, I liked the way that you ended each song section with a refrain that finished with an open, long vowel sound. The “-ay” sound felt comfortable. If my memory serves me correctly, I'm pretty sure that I've read somewhere that Oscar Hammerstein II (of Rodgers and Hammerstein, “Sound Of Music”, etc.) liked to end the lyric of his song sections on an open vowel wherever he could, too. Seems like you're in good company.


I can't deny that I enjoy your choice of comparisons...lol

Quote:
Once again, thank you for letting me work my way through your songs. I really enjoy trying to apply what I've picked up from books and seminars. It's through these analyses that I learn such a lot. In so many ways, your works are a terrific resource for understanding the finer points of song craftsmanship.


Believe me, the pleasure is mine.

Quote:
All in all… an excellent creation, an excellent presentation and a brilliant production. It seems to me that you have definitely discovered how to output the quality of a professional studio. This really doesn't sound like BIAB at all.

All the best,
Noel


Thanks so much, Noel, for such a wonderful review and thoroughly enjoyable discussion. (AND the little guy!)

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#298513 - 06/05/15 02:20 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: Charlie Fogle]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Originally Posted By: dani48
Hi,Floyd !

I fully agree with
everyone calling this
tune a masterpiece !
This must be the best
you´ve written (until
your next masterpiece,
that is)!!!!!

Cheers
Dani

Dani - you are always so kind with your reviews...


Originally Posted By: c_fogle
So if it's not your brother in law borrowing your stuff (Given up for Lent), it ends up at the local pawn shop. Good thing you're not a material guy.


Good song, well written, mixed, produced and performed.

I really enjoyed my listen.


Charlie

Thanks, Charlie. Appreciate you dropping in...

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#298688 - 06/06/15 06:23 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: floyd jane]
Registered: 08/20/11
Posts: 6184
Loc: Winston-Salem, NC USA
Jim Fogle Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/20/11
Posts: 6184
Loc: Winston-Salem, NC USA
Well crafted, sung with the right amount of humor and "radio ready" production. I like this song!
_________________________
Jim Fogle - 2020 BiaB (724) RB (Build 4) Ultra+ PAK
Cakewalk - Zoom MRS-8 recorder
Desktop: i7 Win 10 build 2004, 12GB ram 256GB SSD, 4 TB HDD
Laptop: i3 64bit Win 10 build 1909, 8GB ram 500GB HDD
Music at: http://fogle622.wix.com/fogle622-audio-home

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#298691 - 06/06/15 07:06 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: floyd jane]
Registered: 10/31/08
Posts: 16574
Loc: Australia
Noel96 Offline
Veteran

Registered: 10/31/08
Posts: 16574
Loc: Australia
floyd,

"Life's A Dance" is a great 2-song-section template! (I've just been revisiting Steve Seskins' songs and I think that Michaelangelo is an excellent 3-song-section template, too. At one of his seminars, Steve told us about the story on which the song is based. Apparently verse 1 is exactly what happened when he and his wife were in New York once.)

It was a few years ago now, but one of the things that really impressed me at the Seskin seminars was that he has an amazing ability to create emotional intensity through music and lyrics. It might sound strange, but after a number of his performances, just Steve and his guitar, I found myself with a tear in my eye at the end of the song. I don't know how he did it. There were some really cathartic moments and so many of his songs had a feeling of 'pay-off', a sense of 'that was really worth the journey'. I'd love to be able to accomplish that.

In case anyone who's been reading this thread is interested, the below clip is a repost of a link to Steve Seskin talking about the 'Rule of Two'.

Rule of Two

Also, here's a great version of Seskins' song "Life's A Dance". I was going post John Michael Montgomery's hit version but then I stumbled across this one. I like what appears to be more of a 'home studio' approach of James Williams' version.

Life's A Dance

I've been sitting here this morning, putting the lyrics of "Life's A Dance" under the magnifying glass. There's a lot to be learned here for sure!

All the best,
Noel



_________________________
LINKS TO MY BIAB/RB SONGS


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#298811 - 06/07/15 03:44 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: JoanneCooper]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Originally Posted By: Sundance
+1 What they said. You've got some great funny songs in your repertoire and this one is no exception.

"and the rights to my first born son" LOL!

Totally enjoyed everything about it FJ.

Josie

Josie... thanks for droppin' by...



Originally Posted By: JosieC
Brilliant! What a great write. I once gave my home address as my car registration number on some form or other so I can definately relate to living in a pawn shop!

Other Josie smile - I want to hear that story!!... really...

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#299020 - 06/09/15 03:00 AM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: floyd jane]
Registered: 05/23/10
Posts: 1715
Loc: New Zealand
RichMac Offline
Expert

Registered: 05/23/10
Posts: 1715
Loc: New Zealand
Hi Floyd.
Nice tongue in cheek lyrics and a rockin chorus.
Smooth smooth vocals.
Another one for Floyds radio ready collection.
Cheers.
_________________________
https://soundcloud.com/tuigorge



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#299078 - 06/09/15 12:56 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: Janice & Bud]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Originally Posted By: 90 dB
The more I hear this, the more I like it. I can relate to the pawn shop. grin





Regards,

Bob


SEE!!!!!




Originally Posted By: Janice & Bud
Well, as we say down in South Georgia (USA that is)
"That's stronger than a garlic milkshake!"

When you suggested that "every songwriter
oughta have one" I knew we were in for a treat.
Why, 'cause I knew good and well that if you
took on a theme like that it would be fresh
and inventive. And no disappointments
emerged. Great vocal, great RT's, great
arrangement and mix indeed; but, what we
can't get over is how much powerhouse writing
is packed into this one song. We'd be excited
to conjure up a third of that quality for one
endeavor. If my writing head was that fertile
I'd never stop.

Aw right crank up the broken record "this oughta
be what we hear on country radio. Period
."

J&B

Y'all are too nice. Hat...won't...fit...

Top
#299298 - 06/10/15 11:42 PM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: floyd jane]
Registered: 08/14/11
Posts: 411
Loc: Montana, USA
trapper456 Offline
Journeyman

Registered: 08/14/11
Posts: 411
Loc: Montana, USA
Where is the link where he told people how to get those kind of mixes? I sure would like to read this. Thanks!!!!
_________________________
Music is an expression that is a universal language

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#299312 - 06/11/15 05:03 AM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: Guitarhacker]
Registered: 12/13/13
Posts: 724
olemon Offline
Journeyman

Registered: 12/13/13
Posts: 724
What a wonderful write, Floyd!

Lyrical gems and comical imagery everywhere. The whole dang thing had me smiling throughout the whole dang song!!

Cookouts where you keep the grill....If you have to ask the price....just to highlight two in particular.

Oh yeah, your production and your performance ain't too shabby either:)

Well done!
_________________________
My songs are here:
https://www.reverbnation.com/scottholson
and here:
https://soundcloud.com/scott-h-olson

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#299422 - 06/12/15 06:11 AM [User Showcase] Re: Between The Pawnshop And That Woman [Re: Jim Fogle]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8355
Loc: Florida
Originally Posted By: Sonny Ray
Hi Floyd,
Great lyrics; love your mix!

Thanks, Sonny... always nice to see you drop by...I appreciate your support...


Originally Posted By: JimFogle
Well crafted, sung with the right amount of humor and "radio ready" production. I like this song!

Thanks so much for that, Jim. Appreciate it...

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