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Posts: 4,219 |
Tom,
There are certain type songs that very few people are good at writing.
This - the "patriotic", "remembering the veterans", "fallen hero" type - is a classic example of that. They typically turn out to be "typical" - what I call "cliché writing" (which generally gets confused by most as meaning "writing with clichés" - which is not the same thing at all). They have typical scenarios and an all too typical ending that the writers feel is "the clever ending". Predictable, unimaginative.
THIS is anything but typical. This is a lesson in how it SHOULD be done.
Small pieces of gut-wrenching real-life written down, set to rhythm and rhyme.
You are astounding me with your writing.
Examples?...
"A husband and a father left a wife and newborn son"
Right off the bat, this states the tragedy without pulling punches and without being sappy and/or maudlin.
"When they carved his name in marble that's the least they could have done"
There is SO much packed into this one line. The use of "carved in marble" instead of referencing "The Wall", "the least they could have done" saying what might have taken others an entire verse to get across...
"Seems like it was such a waste we even lost the war
The truth is that we never knew what we were fighting for"
So succinct. Truth laid out clear and simple.
"I walked up to his fathers house one Sunday afternoon
A flag waved from Memorial Day as May turned into June"
A loving picture of remembrance - without getting over-dramatic..
"I just could not bring myself to knock upon his door
And look into those eyes that had been wounded by the war"
This ripped my heart out. That is true talent.
"Found his name behind my own reflection in the wall"
WOW. The use of behind your own reflection is brilliant...
"Nowadays I struggle with my place in all of this"
Great line.
"A friend of mine reduced to just a name upon a list"
Great, great line.
"I could put this all behind me but I ain't goin there yet"
Great line.
"the least that I can do is promise never to forget"
Great, great line.
All four lines here are writing at the highest level.
I'm not even going to talk about how perfect the production, mix and vocal are.
Wow.
floyd I'm speechless, humbled, and grateful for such uplifting comments. Thanks floyd! Tom Hi,
As a disabled Vietnam Vet, I appreciate your kind words about us. And thanks for remembering all the Vets.
I refrained from going to the wall for man y years. I left Vietnam in 1967. Didn't go see the wall until 1998. It was very emotional, but glad I finally went.
Loved the song. That acoustic lead is simply beautiful ... still smiling! Your lyric captured the essence of the moment. But what I enjoyed most is that your lyric was neither patronizing or cheesy like so many songs about Vietnam are. A simple but beautiful arrangement and so nicely performed. If I weren't in this hospital bed, I'd get up and salute you.
Great stuff, Tom!
Al Alan, Thank you for your service and the wonderful comments. I hope you continue to feel better. Tom "found his name behind my own reflection in the wall."
There's more in that line than in many complete writes. Janice teared up when she first heard the song. I couldn't get it off my mind. My best high school buddy was killed in a raid into Cambodia. It took years and years for his family to get his name on the wall -- because we weren't supposed to be in Cambodia. The damn absurdity of it all.
As floyd said it is easy for this type of song to drift into the mundane. You took it in the complete opposite direction and made it, IMO, far and away the best I've ever heard of this, if you will, subgenre. As Janice literally just said, "It's a powerful song and he sings the hell out of it." She said it all.
Bud
Bud, Your choice of words sums up a complex situation perfectly. Absurdity! Thank you both, Tom
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Nice one Tommy. Loved the acoustic lead. It's all been said, and I echo all that was said.
Regards,
Bob
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User Showcase
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Joined: May 2011
Posts: 4,219
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Posts: 4,219 |
Nice one Tommy. Loved the acoustic lead. It's all been said, and I echo all that was said.
Regards,
Bob Bob, Thanks, I appreciate hearing from you. Tom
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floyd said it all. From the first few words in the song, it was clear what a fantastic write this was.
Wow, indeed.
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User Showcase
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Joined: May 2011
Posts: 4,219
Veteran
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OP
Veteran
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 4,219 |
floyd said it all. From the first few words in the song, it was clear what a fantastic write this was.
Wow, indeed. David, Thanks for taking the time to listen and comment. Tom
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Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
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Update Your PowerTracks Pro Audio 2024 Today!
The Newest RealBand 2024 Update is Here!
The newest RealBand 2024 Build 5 update is now available!
Download and install this to your RealBand 2024 for updated print options, streamlined loading and saving of .SGU & MGU (BB) files, and to add a number of program adjustments that address user-reported bugs and concerns.
This free update is available to all RealBand 2024 users. To learn more about this update and download it, head to www.pgmusic.com/support.realband.htm#20245
The Band-in-a-Box® Flash Drive Backup Option
Today (April 5) is National Flash Drive Day!
Did you know... not only can you download your Band-in-a-Box® Pro, MegaPAK, or PlusPAK purchase - you can also choose to add a flash drive backup copy with the installation files for only $15? It even comes with a Band-in-a-Box® keychain!
For the larger Band-in-a-Box® packages (UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, Audiophile Edition), the hard drive backup copy is available for only $25. This will include a preinstalled and ready to use program, along with your installation files.
Backup copies are offered during the checkout process on our website.
Already purchased your e-delivery version, and now you wish you had a backup copy? It's not too late! If your purchase was for the current version of Band-in-a-Box®, you can still reach out to our team directly to place your backup copy order!
Note: the Band-in-a-Box® keychain is only included with flash drive backup copies, and cannot be purchased separately.
Handy flash drive tip: Always try plugging in a USB device the wrong way first? If your flash drive (or other USB plug) doesn't have a symbol to indicate which way is up, look for the side with a seam on the metal connector (it only has a line across one side) - that's the side that either faces down or to the left, depending on your port placement.
Update your Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows® Today!
Update your Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows for free with build 1111!
With this update, there's more control when saving images from the Print Preview window, we've added defaults to the MultiPicker for sorting and font size, updated printing options, updated RealTracks and other content, and addressed user-reported issues with the StylePicker, MIDI Soloists, key signature changes, and more!
Learn more about this free update for Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows at www.pgmusic.com/support_windowsupdates.htm#1111
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 Review: 4.75 out of 5 Stars!
If you're looking for a in-depth review of the newest Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows version, you'll definitely find it with Sound-Guy's latest review, Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows Review: Incredible new capabilities to experiment, compose, arrange and mix songs.
A few excerpts:
"The Tracks view is possibly the single most powerful addition in 2024 and opens up a new way to edit and generate accompaniments. Combined with the new MultiPicker Library Window, it makes BIAB nearly perfect as an 'intelligent' composer/arranger program."
"MIDI SuperTracks partial generation showing six variations – each time the section is generated it can be instantly auditioned, re-generated or backed out to a previous generation – and you can do this with any track type. This is MAJOR! This takes musical experimentation and honing an arrangement to a new level, and faster than ever."
"Band in a Box continues to be an expansive musical tool-set for both novice and experienced musicians to experiment, compose, arrange and mix songs, as well as an extensive educational resource. It is huge, with hundreds of functions, more than any one person is likely to ever use. Yet, so is any DAW that I have used. BIAB can do some things that no DAW does, and this year BIAB has more DAW-like functions than ever."
Convenient Ways to Listen to Band-in-a-Box® Songs Created by Program Users!
The User Showcase Forum is an excellent place to share your Band-in-a-Box® songs and listen to songs other program users are creating!
There are other places you can listen to these songs too! Visit our User Showcase page to sort by genre, artist (forum name), song title, and date - each listing will direct you to the forum post for that song.
If you'd rather listen to these songs in one place, head to our Band-in-a-Box® Radio, where you'll have the option to select the genre playlist for your listening pleasure. This page has SoundCloud built in, so it won't redirect you. We've also added the link to the Artists SoundCloud page here, and a link to their forum post.
We hope you find some inspiration from this amazing collection of User Showcase Songs!
Congratulations to the 2023 User Showcase Award Winners!
We've just announced the 2023 User Showcase Award Winners!
There are 45 winners, each receiving a Band-in-a-Box 2024 UltraPAK! Read the official announcement to see if you've won.
Our User Showcase Forum receives more than 50 posts per day, with people sharing their Band-in-a-Box songs and providing feedback for other songs posted.
Thank you to everyone who has contributed!
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