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#128779 - 09/12/11 04:38 AM [User Showcase] Crossed Lines
Registered: 08/16/10
Posts: 114
Loc: Surrey,England
Mr_Songman Offline
Apprentice

Registered: 08/16/10
Posts: 114
Loc: Surrey,England
Hi all,

This is a song I originally wrote over twenty years ago. I think it was about the 4th song I ever wrote. I've always had high hopes for it, but on listening to it again fairly recently it struck me that I had a problem with it.

The original lyric, with it's references to "the operator" and other such things had been made obsolete by new telephone technology.

The first half was okay but the second half I felt required a complete re write. I think it still works!

Let me know what you think - all comments welcome.


Equipment: Roland VS 1680
Digitech Vocalist VR
Alesis 3630 Compressor
Rode NT1 Microphone
Art Studio V3 Pre Amp
BBE Sonic Sweet

****** Song Summary *************
Title: CROSSED LINES
Key=D , Tempo 128, Length (m:s)=3:43

Soloist is saved with the song : Pop 8ths Harmonica (11)
Style is _POPS136.STY (Fast Country Rock Style (140 RS))

Style MIDI Instruments are :
RealTracks in style: 521:Bass, Electric, Pop Syncopated Ev 136
RealTracks in style: ~528:Guitar, Acoustic, Fingerpicking Hank Sw 120
RealTracks in style: ~~405:Guitar, Acoustic, Strumming Ev 120
RealTracks in style: ~~509:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm Dire Ev 120
RealTracks in song: 621:Pedal Steel, Background Easy Ev 136
RealDrums in Style: NashvilleEven8^6-HiHat,HHatO
*******************

CROSSED LINES: http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=10749103
_________________________
Music is what feelings sound like.

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#128780 - 09/12/11 09:34 PM [User Showcase] Re: Crossed Lines [Re: Mr_Songman]
Registered: 02/11/05
Posts: 2646
Loc: Kentucky
PgFantastic Offline
Veteran

Registered: 02/11/05
Posts: 2646
Loc: Kentucky
Very well written song. Nice flow to it. Very well produced tune. Thanks for sharing!



My Music
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Psalm 57:7 My heart, O God, is steadfast, my heart is steadfast; I will sing and make music.

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#128781 - 09/13/11 12:00 AM [User Showcase] Re: Crossed Lines [Re: PgFantastic]
Registered: 05/30/08
Posts: 4318
Sundance Offline
Veteran

Registered: 05/30/08
Posts: 4318
Hey Martin,

I really like the melody and especially the chorus. The production is good. I love the vibrato in your voice but I would use less vibrato on the harmonies. Lyrically, to me if in your opening you said while "we" were working instead of "I" - it would let us listeners know right up front they are both working possibly in the same place and make the story easier to follow. Just my opinion - feel free to ignore.

Nice flow. Clever idea.

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#128782 - 09/16/11 10:27 AM [User Showcase] Re: Crossed Lines [Re: Sundance]
Registered: 08/16/10
Posts: 114
Loc: Surrey,England
Mr_Songman Offline
Apprentice

Registered: 08/16/10
Posts: 114
Loc: Surrey,England
Hi Josie,

Your point about the opening verse is an excellent one and something that I had missed.

Probably because on the original recording twenty years ago, they weren't in the office together. The whole second half of the song is a re write and, to be honest, I'm still not happy with it.

Guess I'll have to re write the re write to make the re write right!!

Thanks again

Martin
_________________________
Music is what feelings sound like.

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#128783 - 09/16/11 04:17 PM [User Showcase] Re: Crossed Lines [Re: Mr_Songman]
Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 11624
Loc: Hamlin NY
MarioD Online   content
Veteran

Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 11624
Loc: Hamlin NY
Very nicely done! I really like the lyrics, very catchy chorus, and of course your vocals are excellent. Great backing tracks and a nice mix also.

Two thumbs up
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Politicians, like diapers, occasionally need to be changed. Usually for the same reason!

64 bit Win 10 Pro - the latest BiaB and RB - Roland Octa-Capture audio interface - a ton of software and some hardware.

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#128784 - 09/17/11 06:26 PM [User Showcase] Re: Crossed Lines [Re: MarioD]
Registered: 10/31/08
Posts: 14142
Loc: Australia
Noel96 Offline
Veteran

Registered: 10/31/08
Posts: 14142
Loc: Australia
Quote:

Very nicely done! I really like the lyrics, very catchy chorus, and of course your vocals are excellent. Great backing tracks and a nice mix also.

Two thumbs up



I couldn't agree more. This song is an excellent listen.

All the best,
Noel
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#128785 - 09/27/11 04:48 AM [User Showcase] Re: Crossed Lines [Re: MarioD]
Registered: 08/16/10
Posts: 114
Loc: Surrey,England
Mr_Songman Offline
Apprentice

Registered: 08/16/10
Posts: 114
Loc: Surrey,England
Hi Mario,

Thank you so much for your kind words and for taking the time to listen.

So glad you liked it.

Martin
_________________________
Music is what feelings sound like.

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#128786 - 09/27/11 04:49 AM [User Showcase] Re: Crossed Lines [Re: Noel96]
Registered: 08/16/10
Posts: 114
Loc: Surrey,England
Mr_Songman Offline
Apprentice

Registered: 08/16/10
Posts: 114
Loc: Surrey,England
Hi Noel,

Thanks for stopping by and having a listen and for the kind comments.

Martin
_________________________
Music is what feelings sound like.

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#128787 - 09/27/11 08:38 PM [User Showcase] Re: Crossed Lines [Re: Mr_Songman]
Registered: 08/09/10
Posts: 3503
Loc: Woodstock, NY
rsdean Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/09/10
Posts: 3503
Loc: Woodstock, NY
Hey Martin,

I really enjoyed this - great song and vocal. Your voice reminds me of BJ Thomas. Great job!

Bob
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