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#148948 - 01/30/12 11:27 PM [User Showcase] A gentle heart
Registered: 01/28/12
Posts: 3149
Loc: Murgon Queensland Australia
Rob4580 Online   content
Veteran

Registered: 01/28/12
Posts: 3149
Loc: Murgon Queensland Australia
Hey all just listed another original.
All comments welcome. Written with BB real tracks.

Many thanks Rob.

Sound Cloud

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#148949 - 01/31/12 12:16 AM [User Showcase] Re: A gentle heart [Re: Rob4580]
Registered: 06/17/10
Posts: 1943
Loc: Canyon Lake, TX
Steve Young Offline
Expert

Registered: 06/17/10
Posts: 1943
Loc: Canyon Lake, TX
Rob,

Very nice! I love your voice on this one. A little bit of a Roy Orbison feel. Well written song. Good tempo. Good instrumentation. Good arrangement.

Now for my nits. Remember only my opinions and others may disagree...

I would have added one more measure to the intro. I know that makes it a 5 bar intro, and that's a little odd. But the first 3 bars are sustain chords with snare and bass carrying the beat. Then when it settles into the actual strumming guitar foundation of the song with sidestick pattern you start the vocals after only one measure. I think one more measure of strumming and sidestick would make for a more comfortable start of the song. It's a very short song so one more bar won't hurt at all.

Another thing I would change is the ritard at the end. The slow down of the last 2 bars sounds too mechanical and would probably work better without slowing down at all. Again just my opinion.

I really like the song and your lead vocals really shine on this one!

Thanks for posting this one!

Steve
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Steve Young
Music
"In order to compose, all you need to do is remember a tune that nobody else has thought of." - Robert Schumann

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#148950 - 01/31/12 12:28 AM [User Showcase] Re: A gentle heart [Re: Steve Young]
Registered: 10/25/08
Posts: 7766
Loc: Winston-Salem, NC
Pat Marr Offline
Veteran

Registered: 10/25/08
Posts: 7766
Loc: Winston-Salem, NC
You're a natural, my friend! I suspect you've been playing music for a while now haven't you? What a mellow voice, I'm so envious!

My take on the intro was that it's a bit different than one might expect, but I thought it worked. I like hearing the unexpected in music like this. It keeps me interested.

My only nitpick is the the song ended abruptly ... could have been faded to a full silence instead of to a partial silence then BAM.. no more song.

But that's a small thing and easily fixed. All in all I liked your song quite a bit.

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#148951 - 02/02/12 06:08 AM [User Showcase] Re: A gentle heart [Re: Pat Marr]
Registered: 01/28/12
Posts: 3149
Loc: Murgon Queensland Australia
Rob4580 Online   content
Veteran

Registered: 01/28/12
Posts: 3149
Loc: Murgon Queensland Australia
Hello to Steve and Pat.
Thanks for your kind coments guys.

To Steve thanks for the idea of the longer intro.
when I listened back I did notice the bass line was a little out of sinc from what it should have been. So a longer intro may set that right.

To Pat.
Yes I have been playing a while.
Its a hobby I use to get away from things for a while.

Its even better if you can share it with others.
I take on board all the advice you guys offer.

I intend to post some more tunes as I write and mix them.

Thanks for your encouragement.
It goes way further than you may think.

Regards to all Rob

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#148952 - 02/05/12 07:07 AM [User Showcase] Re: A gentle heart [Re: Rob4580]
Registered: 01/08/11
Posts: 3551
Tommyc Offline
Veteran

Registered: 01/08/11
Posts: 3551
Nice tune Iron Bark Bob ,thanks for sharing !

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#148953 - 02/05/12 07:32 AM [User Showcase] Re: A gentle heart [Re: Tommyc]
Registered: 11/04/10
Posts: 503
Loc: Midwest
RobbMiller Offline
Journeyman

Registered: 11/04/10
Posts: 503
Loc: Midwest
Roy or Elvis?

Anywho, I enjoyed the song.

I Didn't notice a problem with the opening; the abrupt ending needs a fix though. Did you tell BIAB to use a 4-bar ending in the 'Song Settings' dialog? May be as simple as that.

I like the slowdown at the end, though it does sound a wee bit forced; more of a "rallentando" than a "ritardando". Try using the 'Bar Settings' dialog to spread the tempo change out over a few more bars.

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#148954 - 02/05/12 05:55 PM [User Showcase] Re: A gentle heart [Re: RobbMiller]
Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 14102
Loc: Hamlin NY
MarioD Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 14102
Loc: Hamlin NY
Hi Rob, This is a very good song.

I had no problem with the intro but with a little polish the ending might be improved, although it isn’t too bad as it stands now.

I would suggest that you bring up your vocals just a tad. You have a fantastic voice, I’m jealous, so it should be more out front IMHO.

Great job and two thumbs up.
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It has been a joy being quarantined with my wife. We've caught up on all the things I have done wrong in our 53 years of marriage!

64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB and RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software and some hardware.

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