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#361791 08/21/16 04:55 PM
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I wrote this song with the hope that somebody famous would plagiarise it and I could then make lotsa money in the ensuing court case.

A quick scene setter:
verse one: A man and a woman are sitting at a table across from one another in a one room almost bare wooden house like in a 1950's cowboy film. He is speaking
verse two: He has stood up and she is looking as if she is about to cry
solo guitar, He kisses her face for the last time and heads to the door
At the reprise He opens the door and turns his head back one more time and then goes out into the open country side, dark storm clouds on the horizon and strides purposefully into the distance. She is at the door crying as it starts to rain.

This is goodbye

this is the last time I tell you I love you
this is the last time I tell you I care
I've had enough of your crying
I've had enough of our lies
now you can see that for once in my life I am free
it hurts me to say but we both know its true cos this is the end
this is goodbye
this is goodbye goodbye

don't you dare follow me as I walk out the door out your life
I wont look back as the sky starts to fall I wont cry
its takin' me all of my trying
it's cost us both part of our lives
now you can see that for once in your life I am free
it hurts me to say but we both know its true cos this is the end
this is goodbye
this is goodbye goodbye

solo

it hurts me to say but we both know its true cos this is the end
this is goodbye
this is goodbye goodbye


RealTracks in song: 793:Guitar, Acoustic, Strumming ModernCountrySync Ev 100
RealTracks in song: 2051:Guitar, Acoustic, Fingerpicking CountryBrent Ev 085
RealDrums in Song: Tango: a: Kick, Snare b: 4x Kick, Snare

me on everything else using Proteus Emu free, NI FM7

enjoy

Alyn

gibson #361792 08/21/16 05:29 PM
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Very cool Alyn!! You had me wondering when I saw the other instruments listed and I was hearing only the finger picked guitar, but the instrumental ending was GREAT! I like the way you kept it simple until the end. Some really beautiful chord changes in this. Great to have you around here again. Really enjoyed this!! Take care and stay around. Greg

gibson #361795 08/21/16 06:22 PM
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Alyn,

It's so great to have you back posting on the forum. No-one, absolutely no-one can do what you do. Everything you write is classic gibson through and through. I always enjoy what you bring to Users Showcase.

Hopefully one day I'll read about this song in the paper in a multimillion dollar lawsuit!

All the best,
Noel


MY SONGS...
Audiophile BIAB 2024
gibson #361801 08/21/16 10:33 PM
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Hi Alyn.

A fabulous track.

Wonderful contrast between the super smooth guitar and the voice which is just SO full of attitude. You manage to capture all the bitterness and resentment in the lyric, then team it with a folk guitar backing and amazingly it all works like magic. Very Gibson.

The ending was inspired.

You need to get someone to make the video!

ROG.

gibson #361807 08/21/16 11:03 PM
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Alyn,
Most enjoyable and inventive- clever ending and an all round top song.
Enjoyed how you set the scene and resolved the piece. Good one.

Peter

gibson #361814 08/21/16 11:51 PM
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Alyn,

This is great! The full Gibson... smile

Bob

gibson #361818 08/22/16 01:28 AM
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Your opening comments made me smile. I've long said I want to be very rich, be it from talent or litigation.

So glad to see you active on the forum. Your songs are always top notch and thought provoking.

Enjoyed this one a lot.

Charlie


BIAB Ultra Pak+ 2024:RB 2024, Latest builds: Dell Optiplex 7040 Desktop; Windows-10-64 bit, Intel Core i7-6700 3.4GHz CPU and 16 GB Ram Memory.
gibson #361898 08/22/16 12:10 PM
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Alyn.

This is absolutely beautiful!

The lyric is heartbreaking.

"this is the last time I tell you I love you" ... What an opening line!!!

"don't you dare follow me as I walk out the door out your life" ... Just as strong as the opener!!!

"I wont look back as the sky starts to fall I wont cry" ... Oh...wow..nice...


The melody (and accompanying chords) is absolutely STUNNING. Gorgeous with a capital G. Like something McCartney would come up with. With a little help from Lennon. (in fact, I was wishing there was some of that typical below-the-melody harmony that they used to do).

This is a song I wish I had written.

Damn! This is good! I love it. Can't stop listening to it...

Love your vocal on this. Cool production.

Big Standing O, buddy.

floyd

gibson #361935 08/22/16 10:01 PM
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Hello, Alyn

The melody lines made with the isomorphic iteration of phrasing are very beautiful.
The lyrics are heartbreaking and painful.
I do love the lyrics.
And your vocal that reminds John Lennon a little bit is very fitted with this tune.
Very enjoyed the listen.

Best Regards.

Shigeki Adachi

gibson #361982 08/23/16 06:25 AM
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"this is the last time I tell you I love you
this is the last time I tell you I care"

Wow, do those lines ever establish the theme.
The juxtaposition of your vocals and the RTs is brilliant!

Welcome back with a great song!

J&B

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Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
Very cool Alyn!! You had me wondering when I saw the other instruments listed and I was hearing only the finger picked guitar, but the instrumental ending was GREAT! I like the way you kept it simple until the end. Some really beautiful chord changes in this. Great to have you around here again. Really enjoyed this!! Take care and stay around. Greg


Thanks Greg,
Ole Brent plays some mean fingerpickin' and his playing just added so much, as I initially had the strum guitar all the way through, that he HAD to play alone.
So glad you enjoyed it
Yeh I'll try and stay this time blush

Noel96 #361992 08/23/16 07:02 AM
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Originally Posted By: Noel96
Alyn,

It's so great to have you back posting on the forum. No-one, absolutely no-one can do what you do. Everything you write is classic gibson through and through. I always enjoy what you bring to Users Showcase.

Hopefully one day I'll read about this song in the paper in a multimillion dollar lawsuit!

All the best,
Noel


Thanks Noel,
Rather than a curt case I would like to have my songs stand out on their own LOL

Thanks for listening

Alyn

ROG #361995 08/23/16 07:08 AM
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Originally Posted By: ROG
Hi Alyn.

A fabulous track.

Wonderful contrast between the super smooth guitar and the voice which is just SO full of attitude. You manage to capture all the bitterness and resentment in the lyric, then team it with a folk guitar backing and amazingly it all works like magic. Very Gibson.

The ending was inspired.

You need to get someone to make the video!

ROG.

Cheers ROG,
I wrote the lyrics after listening to a row in the cafe laugh I cut out the swear words tho grin I wish I had done that walk in my divorce rather than creeping away.

As it happens I am in contact with a Video company about the loss of my career so I took your advice and emailed then....who knows??

So glad you enjoyed

Alyn

PeterF #361996 08/23/16 07:10 AM
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Originally Posted By: PeterF
Alyn,
Most enjoyable and inventive- clever ending and an all round top song.
Enjoyed how you set the scene and resolved the piece. Good one.

Peter


Thanks Peter,
I wish I had thought of what you wrote myself, it nevercrossed my mind I had written a complete piece. Carried away in the heat of the music cool

Alyn

gibson #362008 08/23/16 08:31 AM
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Alyn,

This sounds very theatrical. Should be in a big musical!


"...this is goodbye goodbye..."


I can see the curtains slowly closing as the spotlight fades........


Regards,

Bob

gibson #362036 08/23/16 10:52 AM
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Definitely a full Gibson!
It has enough tightness, and drama to last for a while ;-)
indeed good to have you back posting those truly original songs!

Rob


We are Rob Meulman and Anne-Marie Bovenkamp from The Netherlands.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1gsdNLE7_Gy8qavoOplQow/videos
http://rnam.net/


rsdean #362407 08/25/16 05:59 PM
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Originally Posted By: rsdean
Alyn,

This is great! The full Gibson... smile

Bob


Cheers Bob, thanks for listening and commenting

Alyn

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Originally Posted By: Charlie Fogle
Your opening comments made me smile. I've long said I want to be very rich, be it from talent or litigation.

So glad to see you active on the forum. Your songs are always top notch and thought provoking.

Enjoyed this one a lot.

Charlie


I want to be rich, period grin
Glad you enjoyed the theatrics!!
thanks for listening

Alyn

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Originally Posted By: floyd jane
Alyn.

This is absolutely beautiful!

The lyric is heartbreaking.

"this is the last time I tell you I love you" ... What an opening line!!!

"don't you dare follow me as I walk out the door out your life" ... Just as strong as the opener!!!

"I wont look back as the sky starts to fall I wont cry" ... Oh...wow..nice...


The melody (and accompanying chords) is absolutely STUNNING. Gorgeous with a capital G. Like something McCartney would come up with. With a little help from Lennon. (in fact, I was wishing there was some of that typical below-the-melody harmony that they used to do).

This is a song I wish I had written.

Damn! This is good! I love it. Can't stop listening to it...

Love your vocal on this. Cool production.

Big Standing O, buddy.

floyd



thanks floyd,
thank you, thank you and thank you for that review.
the one thing that really means a lot to me was
Quote:
This is a song I wish I had written.
Me, I have always wished I could write like you. And this has given me an idea for a song, but don't hold your breath!
never thought of a harmony on the vocals as you suggested, interesting idea!! Lennon and McCartney, and Harrison, are/ were great influences stored in my brain.

Thank you, floyd!

Alyn
*buys floyd a large cold one to say thanks*

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Originally Posted By: animarorecords
Hello, Alyn

The melody lines made with the isomorphic iteration of phrasing are very beautiful.
The lyrics are heartbreaking and painful.
Quote:

I do love the lyrics.
And your vocal that reminds John Lennon a little bit is very fitted with this tune.
Very enjoyed the listen.

Best Regards.

Shigeki Adachi


Shigeki,

thank you so much for your lovely comments especially
Quote:
the isomorphic iteration of phrasing
THAT is an outstanding phrase, I have GOT to use that in a song somehow!

thanks for the Lennon reference, he is still a musical hero of mine.

take care, Sir, and keep producing YOUR masterpieces

Alyn

gibson #362488 08/26/16 11:12 AM
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Alyn, You are certainly an original! Your chord choices always surprise me and they are fantastic. You seem to go places that I never would think of. The melody here is very strong as well as the lyrics. Nice production -the full band coming in was inspired. This is simply outstanding. Tom

gibson #362550 08/26/16 07:12 PM
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Hi Alyn. Nice to have you back on the forum. How is life in Whales? I hope you have had a great summer. Loved this one. Great write!


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gibson #362602 08/27/16 06:30 AM
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Alyn,

This just oozes with pain and gut-wrenching in-your-face honesty.

I love the simplicity of it. Great job man.

gibson #362774 08/28/16 12:26 PM
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I just love the straight forwardness of this and then the production at the end is perfect. A very cool song.

Kenny

gibson #362788 08/28/16 02:17 PM
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Alyn,

Another unique and strong submission from you. I always look forward to hearing what you will do next. I really enjoyed this. Like orchestration at the end.

Steve


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"In order to compose, all you need to do is remember a tune that nobody else has thought of." - Robert Schumann
gibson #362795 08/28/16 03:10 PM
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Hi Alyn

Loved your lyric and vocal. Guitar was very nice as well


Scott Collingwood
https://soundcloud.com/scottt709
https://soundcloud.com/spiritlevel-ca
https://www.youtube.com/@SpiritLevel-ge3hm/
gibson #362819 08/28/16 09:56 PM
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great song, alyn!

the lyrics nail the heart acing, troubled love and…
…when will the video be available?

you are singing as you mean every word of it

just loved the marching drum at the end

einar


MacUser!
gibson #362906 08/29/16 12:25 PM
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Excellent track. Beautiful chord progression and melody you created.
I would see this song as a soundtrack in a movie.


Sergio



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Originally Posted By: Janice & Bud
"this is the last time I tell you I love you
this is the last time I tell you I care"

Wow, do those lines ever establish the theme.
The juxtaposition of your vocals and the RTs is brilliant!

Welcome back with a great song!

J&B



Thanks both

I look at the words now and go wow, did I write them as they just flowed out of my head. The hard part was getting the backing to fit the sorrow

glad you enjoyed

Alyn

90 dB #362983 08/30/16 02:04 AM
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Originally Posted By: 90 dB
Alyn,

This sounds very theatrical. Should be in a big musical!


"...this is goodbye goodbye..."


I can see the curtains slowly closing as the spotlight fades........


Regards,

Bob


Yeh I see this on stage now, thanks to you!
thanks for listening and commenting

take care

Alyn

RnAM #362984 08/30/16 02:07 AM
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Originally Posted By: RnAM
Definitely a full Gibson!
It has enough tightness, and drama to last for a while ;-)
indeed good to have you back posting those truly original songs!

Rob


Rob, thank you so much, for saying that. I really appreciate the comments coming from the RnAM stable of excellence. cool

all the best

Alyn

tommyad #362985 08/30/16 02:14 AM
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Originally Posted By: tommyad
Alyn, You are certainly an original! Your chord choices always surprise me and they are fantastic. You seem to go places that I never would think of. The melody here is very strong as well as the lyrics. Nice production -the full band coming in was inspired. This is simply outstanding. Tom


Tom,
As David Snyder I studied the book of transcribed Beatles' scores so I thank that book for the changes! And the hours in the library at college studying music theory....sorry Dental Surgery grin

So glad you enjoyed it

Alyn

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Originally Posted By: JosieC
Hi Alyn. Nice to have you back on the forum. How is life in Whales? I hope you have had a great summer. Loved this one. Great write!


Wales is corrupt and evil, that is of course just because of my experiences mad BUT words flow thanks to that!!
Thanks for listening and commenting

good to hear you are back as well

All the best

Alyn

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Originally Posted By: David Snyder
Alyn,

This just oozes with pain and gut-wrenching in-your-face honesty.

I love the simplicity of it. Great job man.


Thanks David, coming from you is praise indeed

Alyn

44kfl #363294 08/31/16 07:47 PM
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Originally Posted By: 44kfl
I just love the straight forwardness of this and then the production at the end is perfect. A very cool song.

Kenny


Cheers Kenny,

nothing should distract from the message.
Finding, and trying, the tango drums ended the song perfectly

Thanks for listening

Alyn

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Originally Posted By: Steve Young
Alyn,

Another unique and strong submission from you. I always look forward to hearing what you will do next. I really enjoyed this. Like orchestration at the end.

Steve


It's good to hear you're back as I look forward to your special style of songs

So glad you enjoyed this
All the best

Alyn

Scott C #363296 08/31/16 07:50 PM
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Originally Posted By: Scottt709
Hi Alyn

Loved your lyric and vocal. Guitar was very nice as well


Hi Scott,

thanks for stopping by and listening

Alyn

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Originally Posted By: molsenhouse
great song, alyn!

the lyrics nail the heart acing, troubled love and…
…when will the video be available?

you are singing as you mean every word of it

just loved the marching drum at the end

einar


einar, thanks for listening,
I do not think the video will appear if the current discussions is anything to go by laugh
I thought of my divorce and so meant every word I sang, but quite a few years later grin

thanks for listening

Alyn

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Originally Posted By: Sergio Guarneri


Excellent track. Beautiful chord progression and melody you created.
I would see this song as a soundtrack in a movie.


Sergio


Hi Sergio,
Quote:
I would see this song as a soundtrack in a movie.
if that ever happens, that would be great!!

take care

Alyn

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Congratulations to the 2023 User Showcase Award Winners!

We've just announced the 2023 User Showcase Award Winners!

There are 45 winners, each receiving a Band-in-a-Box 2024 UltraPAK! Read the official announcement to see if you've won.

Our User Showcase Forum receives more than 50 posts per day, with people sharing their Band-in-a-Box songs and providing feedback for other songs posted.

Thank you to everyone who has contributed!

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