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#438644 11/18/17 06:47 AM
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Shine

I`m about as naturally funky as a Jane Austen novel, but in the interests of stretching my comfort zone ...
If you understand the kind of acoustic/electronic mix I tried for here, go ahead and tell me where I`ve gone wrong -just don`t tell me to stick to folk ballads!


style is _ACFNK16.STY (Acoustic Funk Pop 16ths)

RealTracks in style: 1434:Bass, Electric, JazzFunkPoppy Ev16 110
RealTracks in style: 2556:Guitar, Acoustic, Rhythm Pop16thsJoe Ev16 110
RealDrums in style: NashvillePop16^1-a:Snare, Hihat , b:Snare, Ride
RT 2403 Guitar Acoustic Funky Folk
Loop DrumFullKit Rock chillos
RT2704 Synth Cloud Rap
RT 2745 Synth AltHipHop



Shine

hey you in the corner
where echoes fight
to outwatch the night

been saving up your lightning
keep it in a box
now its unlocked

you walk around in a care for nothing coat
to endure
what needs no cure

time time it takes time
find your strange let it shine
you`re one of a kind
you will shine

hey you in the corner
I`m right here
next to your fear

sticks and stones online clones
sow dragon`s teeth
while you sleep

I set the stars to blinking
that`s my tell
all will be well

time time it takes time
find your strange let it shine
you`re one of a kind
you will shine

time time it takes time
find your strange let it shine
you`re one of a kind
you will shine

hey you in the corner


© Robert Cordrey Nov..2017

Robertkc #438672 11/18/17 09:44 AM
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Well Robert, please go on stretching your comfort zone and don't stick to folk ballads.
This is very authentic and especially the chorus is great!

Rob and Anne-Marie


We are Rob Meulman and Anne-Marie Bovenkamp from The Netherlands.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1gsdNLE7_Gy8qavoOplQow/videos
http://rnam.net/


Robertkc #438690 11/18/17 10:56 AM
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great self description! get on with your funky self!

You've written another fine song, it's got soul

very nice, I like this a lot

strong chorus, sticks in yer head

you're a talented man Robert, ballad or funk

enjoyed,

Kenny

Robertkc #438696 11/18/17 11:09 AM
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Hahah, I love Jane Austen novels. And I really like this tune too. Go figure! wink

But hey, in all seriousness I really love this song. You did an amazing job lyrically, and this is definitely something I could see being on the radio. It has that really polished feel to it.

Great job!


Cheers,
Ember
Robertkc #438700 11/18/17 11:33 AM
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Hi Robert. This works really well.
This is a great tune.Rob

Robertkc #438709 11/18/17 11:48 AM
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Hey Robert,

This is a real cool way of breaking the mold! I like this a lot - a really big bunch! Cool arrangement and your vocal is perfect for this. What a great listen! Wishing you the very best,

Alan


BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*32GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar

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Robertkc #438763 11/18/17 08:12 PM
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Hello, Robert

A nice folk rock tune!
It reminds me of Simon & Garfunkel a little bit.
Your vocals and harmonies are very pleasant.
It has a unique chord progression as usual.
I agree with Rob and Anne-Marie.
Please go on stretching your comfort zone and don't stick to folk ballads.
Enjoyed my listen a lot.

Best regards.

Shigeki Adachi

Ember - PG Music #438815 11/19/17 06:35 AM
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Originally Posted By: RnAM
Well Robert, please go on stretching your comfort zone and don't stick to folk ballads.
This is very authentic and especially the chorus is great!

Rob and Anne-Marie


Rob and Anne-Marie,
Thanks for your listen and likes...ok, I`ll keep stretching -next up a Beatles pop tune.

Robert

Originally Posted By: 44kfl
great self description! get on with your funky self!

You've written another fine song, it's got soul

very nice, I like this a lot

strong chorus, sticks in yer head

you're a talented man Robert, ballad or funk

enjoyed,

Kenny


Thanks for the fun endorsement, Kenny - very kind indeed.
The chorus probably owes more to "old" than "new" funk but then my ignorance of modern music is quite extensive!

Robert

Originally Posted By: Ember - PG Music
Hahah, I love Jane Austen novels. And I really like this tune too. Go figure! wink

But hey, in all seriousness I really love this song. You did an amazing job lyrically, and this is definitely something I could see being on the radio. It has that really polished feel to it.

Great job!


Ember,
Radio -ready,really? Well I did work hard on the chorus harmonies so I appreciate your comments on the production side,but its also good to know the lyrics connected (this old guy`s attempt to reach a teenager in distress).


Robert

Robertkc #438850 11/19/17 10:47 AM
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Robert,

What a cool listen! Nicely done.

Cool vocal processing. Really like the stop ending!

The whole thing was kinda Robert-meets-Zappa...

floyd

Robertkc #438900 11/20/17 12:03 AM
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Cool tune, Robert!

Love the chorus especially, great harmonies!! And neat ending too.

Robertkc #438933 11/20/17 06:09 AM
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I really liked this tune, Robert! I love the contrast of the somber vocal delivery with the upbeat and groovy instrumental. I found the lyrics here really captivating as well. And those harmonies!

Great work, and thanks so much for sharing smile


Cheers,
Deryk
animarorecords #439010 11/20/17 02:50 PM
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Originally Posted By: Rob4580
Hi Robert. This works really well.
This is a great tune.Rob


I appreciate your listen and comments, Rob

Originally Posted By: Al-David
Hey Robert,

This is a real cool way of breaking the mold! I like this a lot - a really big bunch! Cool arrangement and your vocal is perfect for this. What a great listen! Wishing you the very best,

Alan


Alan,
Thanks for that - your comments are always so supportive!

Robert

Originally Posted By: animarorecords
Hello, Robert

A nice folk rock tune!
It reminds me of Simon & Garfunkel a little bit.
Your vocals and harmonies are very pleasant.
It has a unique chord progression as usual.
I agree with Rob and Anne-Marie.
Please go on stretching your comfort zone and don't stick to folk ballads.
Enjoyed my listen a lot.

Best regards.

Shigeki Adachi


Hi Shigeki,
I find seeking out somewhat off beat chord changes gives me inspiration for my tunes... I thought the abrupt key change at the end might prompt a comment, but maybe it does work.
Many thanks for your listen and kind words.

Robert

floyd jane #439011 11/20/17 02:59 PM
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Originally Posted By: floyd jane
Robert,

What a cool listen! Nicely done.

Cool vocal processing. Really like the stop ending!

The whole thing was kinda Robert-meets-Zappa...

floyd


Floyd,
You are on to something with the Zappa comment... I couldn`t find any modern funk that I liked, so the rhythm came from listening to Captain Beefheart`s more accessible stuff.
Thanks for mentioning the ending - my favourite part of the song!

Robert

Robertkc #439025 11/20/17 07:07 PM
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Interesting and different. Nice production.

Robertkc #439134 11/21/17 06:27 AM
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Hey Robert. I have been listened to this a couple of times over the last couple of days. Love the back beat on this. Your vocal and lyric were very cool. Love what you are doing with your harmonies. Well done.


Scott Collingwood
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https://soundcloud.com/spiritlevel-ca
https://www.youtube.com/@SpiritLevel-ge3hm/
Robertkc #439174 11/21/17 07:30 AM
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Hey Funk Man, stepping out of the boundaries is fun. And, man, does BiaB ever enable it.

We can hear the Zappa reference for sure. Like Kenny said "it's got soul" and if that's present J&B are gonna like about any genre.

Different? Yep. Good? Yep. A nice combination there.

Speaking of different...those chord changes worked so well.

"been saving up your lightning
keep it in a box
now its unlocked"

Our favorite out of a song full of great lines. Well performed and mixed. It's ALL there.

Enjoyed it!

J&B


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Belladonna #439360 11/21/17 02:47 PM
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Originally Posted By: BlueAttitude
Cool tune, Robert!

Love the chorus especially, great harmonies!! And neat ending too.


Thanks for your listen and comments, Dave.

Robert

Originally Posted By: Deryk - PG Music
I really liked this tune, Robert! I love the contrast of the somber vocal delivery with the upbeat and groovy instrumental. I found the lyrics here really captivating as well. And those harmonies!

Great work, and thanks so much for sharing smile


Deryk,
I appreciate your kind review. For the harmonies I used a combination of my own with BiaB harmoniser... always a reliable backup when I`m vocally challenged!

Robert

Originally Posted By: Belladonna
Interesting and different. Nice production.


I`m glad you gave this song a listen; thanks for your comments.

Robertkc #439545 11/22/17 09:31 AM
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Hey, there, "Robertkc"...

A message posted on an insurance company's marquee where I live advised, "Don't be afraid to go out on a limb, 'cause that where all the fruit is!"

For all its undeniable "funk", the feel and the tone of "Shine" actually seems more like down-tempo electronica, especially with your (flanged?) and roller-coaster vocal effects in the chorus. Your dissonant chord changes lend an eerie sound that augments the dark and sharp-edged lyrics:

"Time, time, it takes time
Find your strange, let it shine
You`re one of a kind
You will shine"


All told, I think "Shine" is something new, something with teeth that I'd call "feral funk".

Ain't it fun when you let your musical imagination go free? cool

Intrigued,

LOREN

Last edited by bluage; 11/22/17 09:34 AM.

"Music is what feelings sound like."-- borrowed from a Cakewalk Music Creator forum member, "Mamabear".
Robertkc #439551 11/22/17 10:05 AM
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Hi Robert.
I think all of the lyrics are wonderful and the whole
song very original and refreshing.
Different is good.
Cheers.

Robertkc #439579 11/22/17 10:46 AM
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Hi Robert,

Came back for another listen. This so different from you i wanted make a return visit after a few days to see if I still liked it as much as I did the first time.

Yep - as much or even more! Hope you do a couple more like this off and on. Yeah - I like it a lot.

Alan


BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*32GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar

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