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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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OP
Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
I'm almost there with this one but please feel free to criticise it in a constructive way so I can learn. I'm never "done" with my songs! I woke up with the first line of verse 1 this month. Been working on it ever since. Let me know what you think. Thanks. CLICK HERE
Last edited by Paul Haynes; 07/27/18 07:51 AM.
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Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,520
Expert
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Expert
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,520 |
Hey Paul, you need to fix the link...didn't connect to anything!
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User Showcase
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
Hey Paul, you need to fix the link...didn't connect to anything! Ah. its was set to private. Fixed now. Thanks.
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User Showcase
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Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 6,892
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Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 6,892 |
Very interesting song!! It is a VERY unusual and extended metaphor. Clever and catchy. Melody and vocals are very good as is the mix. Enjoyed!! Take care. Greg
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User Showcase
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 20,638
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Joined: Dec 2003
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Yes this is a very clever and catchy! Also it is very well mixed. Your vocal is very good.
AFAIAC this is finished.
Excellent work.
Me, it's not about how many times you fail, it's about how many times you get back up. Cop, that's not how field sobriety tests work.
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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User Showcase
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Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 7,522
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Veteran
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 7,522 |
Really like the back track on this song. Excellent vocal. Well done
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Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 112
Apprentice
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Apprentice
Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 112 |
I agree... Excellent. Very nice song.
------------------------------------------ My music: https://soundcloud.com/ermar-gamarMy stuff: Stratocaster '89, PRS SE Santana, Digitech RP90 Multi Effect, Vocalist Live 3, Digital Piano Korg SP, Studio One 3.5, Presonus Audiobox, BB 2018
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Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 6,576
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Veteran
Joined: Sep 2010
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Pleasant, jaunty song. Well sung, nice voice, good mix. From a technical point of view, my only advice would be to keep doing what you're doing. From a songsmith perspective, I'm not really a fan of songs that come right out and tell people to do something. But this didn't irritate me as much usual, so you're doing something right there, too.
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
Thanks guys. Much appreciated.
I wrote this song aimed at myself.
On a technical note, I think this is one of the better songs I've written/recorded/mixed but I know its not perfect. I tried to add some percussion using EZdrummer2 but couldn't find the right timing so I left it out.
Last edited by Paul Haynes; 07/28/18 05:08 AM.
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Joined: May 2017
Posts: 1,682
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Expert
Joined: May 2017
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Nice song, to me it sounds like the start of a tv show.
Good clean recording/mix.
Would have liked to have seen the instruments used etc.
win 10 64 bit 16gb,i7 chip, ssd 500gb, m-audio air, ,Roland BK-7M, 1000,shure sm7b,sonar,acid,mixcraft, variety of plugins.Sample tank 3,Kontakt. TC Helicon Voicelive 3 2 . https://beatmaster1.bandcamp.com/releases
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User Showcase
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
...Would have liked to have seen the instruments used etc. Hi Beatmaster Sorry for delay. My mix was made up of... Roadrun.sty (Road Run Funky Acoustic Blues) Realtracks My Takamine guitar My vocals Mixed in Studio One
Last edited by Paul Haynes; 07/31/18 04:07 AM.
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Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 3,414
PG Music Staff
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PG Music Staff
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 3,414 |
Really nice work Paul A really interesting metaphor, as others have mentioned. The mix job sounds really professional, and I enjoyed your vocal delivery a lot too. Keep up the great work, and thanks for sharing!
Cheers, Deryk
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Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,089
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Joined: Nov 2007
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Good song! Nice mix too, just the right amount of processing on your (very fine!) vocal.
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Joined: Aug 2017
Posts: 547
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Aug 2017
Posts: 547 |
LOL very creative. Great advice in a bit of an unconventional form. Your vocals sound great. Nice choice of tracks. Well done.
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Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 10,099
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Paul,
I like the sound you developed. The song has good balance and dynamics as far as I'm concerned. You vocal blends in with the rest of the song.
I like the lyrics.
My ONLY complaint is you do not have download enabled. This one's a keeper as far as I'm concerned.
Jim Fogle - 2024 BiaB (1109) RB (Build 3) Ultra+ PAK Cakewalk - Zoom MRS-8 recorder Desktop: i7 Win 10 build 2004, 12GB ram 256GB SSD, 4 TB HDD Laptop: i3 64bit Win 10 build 21H2, 8GB ram 500GB HDD Music at: https://fogle622.wix.com/fogle622-audio-home
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,399
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Joined: Dec 2012
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Very nice, Paul! The acoustic backing tracks are perfect for this. Your voice is really smooth clear. Nice mix. I really enjoyed this. Best to you.
Alan
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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Journeyman
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Posts: 412 |
Paul,
I like the sound you developed. The song has good balance and dynamics as far as I'm concerned. You vocal blends in with the rest of the song.
I like the lyrics.
My ONLY complaint is you do not have download enabled. This one's a keeper as far as I'm concerned. Thanks Jim. I didn't know you could do that. I've now enabled downloads and you are free to use it. Thanks for your encouragement.
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User Showcase
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 412 |
Apologies that I've not thanked everyone personally. You've all been encouraging as usual and I appreciate that but please don't be afraid to criticize my work if you feel you would like to, I can learn better that way of things I've not thought about or stuff I need to be aware of to make it better. I'm never settled with my work, always wanting that "studio" rather than a home made sound.
Last edited by Paul Haynes; 08/04/18 05:49 AM.
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I wrote this song aimed at myself. I got to thinking how you could go about making this message less direct, and "The Gambler" came to mind - in that song, instead of the singer talking to the listener, it was a character talking to a singer. So a different approach would be to have the singer getting advice from a mechanic - "I don't know anything about love, but I know about fixing stuff..." sort of conceit, with the listener being able to make the jump between fixing rusty bolts and a relationship. I don't know that it would be a better - I'm not saying there's anything wrong with the direct approach - just saying it's a slightly different way to approach it. You'd have to waste at least one verse on the setup, so it's certainly not as efficient.
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Joined: Aug 2014
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CHORUS Love your Wife - like penetrating oil Soak her in your love - every day As it penetrates - to the hardest place Wait for your breakthrough - and pray for grace Love your Wife - like penetrating oil Paul, if I show this to my wife I am going to lose 3 hours right in the middle of my day. Oh heck, why not.
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Convenient Ways to Listen to Band-in-a-Box® Songs Created by Program Users!
The User Showcase Forum is an excellent place to share your Band-in-a-Box® songs and listen to songs other program users are creating!
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We hope you find some inspiration from this amazing collection of User Showcase Songs!
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There are 45 winners, each receiving a Band-in-a-Box 2024 UltraPAK! Read the official announcement to see if you've won.
Our User Showcase Forum receives more than 50 posts per day, with people sharing their Band-in-a-Box songs and providing feedback for other songs posted.
Thank you to everyone who has contributed!
Video: Volume Automation in Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows®
Video: Audio Input Monitoring with Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows®
Video: Enhanced Melodists in Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows®!
We've enhanced the Melodists feature included in Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows!
Access the Melodist feature by pressing F7 in the program to open the new MultiPicker Library and locate the [Melodist] tab.
You can now generate a melody on any track in the program - very handy! Plus, you select how much of the melody you want generated - specify a range, or apply it to the whole track.
See the Melodist in action with our video, Band-in-a-Box® 2024: The Melodist Window.
Learn even more about the enhancements to the Melodist feature in Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows at www.pgmusic.com/manuals/bbw2024upgrade/chapter3.htm#enhanced-melodist
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New with the DAW Plugin Version 6.0, released with Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows: the Reaper® Panel!
This new panel offers built-in specific support for the Reaper® DAW API allowing direct transfer of Band-in-a-Box® files to/from Reaper® tracks!
When you run the Plugin from Reaper®, there is a panel to set the following options:
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-Render Audio & Instructions: Enable this option to generate audio files and the Reaper instructions.
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Band-in-a-Box® 2024 DAW Plugin Version 6: New Features Video
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