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Joined: Jun 2018
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This is a song I originally wrote in 2013 after I, along with members of my family, ran into some serious health battles. I have two recordings from 2013 and figured I would try to re-imagine this tune using BIAB. I decided on a very simple arrangement. I am not at my "BIAB computer," so I will have to post the backing tracks later. The Dream(c)2018 David S. Becker Music https://soundcloud.com/gocartmoz/the-dream-redux-2018Intro Verse 1I'm walking Down a narrow road I'm carrying Such a heavy load I'm losing my breath Trying not to fall behind I'm struggling To stay within the lines Verse 2A weight it lifts No more need to fight A blast of air And a radiant light I'm for once at ease As the air it fills my lungs The pain is gone My body and mind go numb Pre-ChorusBut I can't escape This nightmare Why must I have to wake This existence I'd forsake I've survived too long In this hospice In my dream I'm set free It's where I want to be ChorusI want to go home Home There's nothing here for me But pain & misery Home I need to go home Won't someone set me free Take these shackles off of me BridgeWell I have a pulse My heart's beating I can take a breath I'm breathing But the pain is never easing And to suffer there's no meaning Verse 3I am sleeping With a peaceful ease No bitter cold Just a soothing breeze There's a voice that's faint Screaming "stay with me" A shock to the heart Why can't they let me be Repeat Pre-chorus Repeat Chorus Outro
Last edited by GocartMoz; 08/25/18 02:10 AM.
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User Showcase
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Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,089
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A very powerful and moving song!
Simple arrangement is perfect IMHO, anything else would get in the way.
Nicely done!
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Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 13,978
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That'll rip the paint off your heart.
Very moving and the perfect backup to support the moving vocal and lyric.
We are with Dave that anymore, arrangement wise, would not add anything.
Great work!
J&B
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Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 3,414
PG Music Staff
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Joined: Feb 2017
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Really well done Very moving, and imply put - it is beautiful. You can feel the sincerity in your voice and lyrics. It is perfectly catchy as well, and very well produced. Great work and thanks for sharing!
Cheers, Deryk
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Joined: Jun 2018
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A very powerful and moving song!
Simple arrangement is perfect IMHO, anything else would get in the way.
Nicely done! Thank you for the listen and comments. It is greatly appreciated. Dave
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Joined: Jan 2016
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Hi GocartMoz, Thanks for sharing this with us! I found this very easy to listen to and has a pleasant chord structure. Great work on the guitars. Nice work on the vocals too, especially at the bridge. Well done!
Cheers, Joe
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Joined: Jul 2015
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What a nice song! Full of emotional heartfelt lyrics and performance! Great vocal! Thanks, Torrey
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User Showcase
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Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 160
Apprentice
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Apprentice
Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 160 |
That'll rip the paint off your heart.
Very moving and the perfect backup to support the moving vocal and lyric.
We are with Dave that anymore, arrangement wise, would not add anything.
Great work!
J&B Hey J & B , Always appreciate hearing your thoughts. Thanks much for giving this a listen and commenting. Dave
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,399
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What a terrific, although, poignant song. The simplicity of the background tracks is the perfect complement to the straightforward lyric. Everything about this powerful and compellinmg. Best to you and yours.
Alan
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Joined: Aug 2012
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Dave,
A very powerful write and a very powerful performance and presentation.
The piano/organ combination works really well for this. Nice production and mix. The "touch of fiddle", works well, too...
Seems like you have quickly "gotten comfortable" with the BAND!
Well done.
fj
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Joined: Nov 2012
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A strong and emotional write, great performance
Florida is well represented on these forums by
really good songwriters!
I love the sparse backing, it's my "go to" very often
good storytelling, it put me in the "Lord save me from this fate"
frame of mind.
Kenny
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User Showcase
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Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 160
Apprentice
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Apprentice
Joined: Jun 2018
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Really well done Very moving, and imply put - it is beautiful. You can feel the sincerity in your voice and lyrics. It is perfectly catchy as well, and very well produced. Great work and thanks for sharing! Thank you Derek, I appreciate the comments. Dave
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User Showcase
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Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 160
Apprentice
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Apprentice
Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 160 |
Hi GocartMoz, Thanks for sharing this with us! I found this very easy to listen to and has a pleasant chord structure. Great work on the guitars. Nice work on the vocals too, especially at the bridge. Well done! Thx for the listen. Interestingly though there is no guitar in this recording. I originally included some acoustic tracks with me playing, but decided to nix them as I wanted to keep it sparse. Appreciate the listen. Thanks, Dave
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User Showcase
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Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 160
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Apprentice
Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 160 |
What a nice song! Full of emotional heartfelt lyrics and performance! Great vocal! Thanks, Torrey Thank you Torrey. I appreciate your thoughts. Dave
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Joined: Feb 2003
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A remarkable song Dave, incredibly moving, sincere and so well put together. Well done my friend.
John
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User Showcase
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Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 160
Apprentice
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OP
Apprentice
Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 160 |
What a terrific, although, poignant song. The simplicity of the background tracks is the perfect complement to the straightforward lyric. Everything about this powerful and compellinmg. Best to you and yours.
Alan Thank you Alan. I appreciate your time listening and commenting. Dave
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Joined: Aug 2010
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David,
This is very moving... I love the song and performance. Some very fine production here as well.
Bob
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Joined: Dec 2013
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POWERFUL, riveting, passionate!!! Beautifully done. I would not change a thing about this. BTW, is the piano an RT? I'd like to check that one out. My mom is 87 and this pretty much describes her life. It is difficult to watch. Fortunately her pain is relatively mild most of the time but there is so little there for her that I wonder how she pushes on. GREAT work here!! Take care. Greg
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Joined: Jul 2012
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Expert
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Your vocal is filled with emotion! Wonderful choice of instruments and arrangement!
very much enjoyed!
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Joined: Dec 2003
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Well that was a powerful and sad song. Really nicely produced written and performed. A strong composition. Peter
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Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
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Convenient Ways to Listen to Band-in-a-Box® Songs Created by Program Users!
The User Showcase Forum is an excellent place to share your Band-in-a-Box® songs and listen to songs other program users are creating!
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Video: Volume Automation in Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows®
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Video: Enhanced Melodists in Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows®!
We've enhanced the Melodists feature included in Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows!
Access the Melodist feature by pressing F7 in the program to open the new MultiPicker Library and locate the [Melodist] tab.
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See the Melodist in action with our video, Band-in-a-Box® 2024: The Melodist Window.
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Band-in-a-Box® 2024 DAW Plugin Version 6: New Features Specifically for Reaper®
New with the DAW Plugin Version 6.0, released with Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows: the Reaper® Panel!
This new panel offers built-in specific support for the Reaper® DAW API allowing direct transfer of Band-in-a-Box® files to/from Reaper® tracks!
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Band-in-a-Box® 2024 DAW Plugin Version 6: New Features Video
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