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dcuny #653541 04/28/21 04:37 AM
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Originally Posted By: dcuny
Good job! It was all clever (and a nice listen), but I thought the ending especially so. laugh


Thanks David for your kind words smile Glad you liked the ending, it is telling how difficult it is to know when the waiting ends.

Janne


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Sundance #653542 04/28/21 04:38 AM
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Originally Posted By: Sundance
Excellent write Jan. Cool song and one of your best lyrics.

Josie


Thanks Josie, I appreciate your kind feedback smile Glad you especially liked my lyrics.

Janne


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jannesan #653693 04/29/21 08:02 AM
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Hey Janne,

This is wonderful. I don't know why but this reminds me a little bit of some of the experimental stuff on the Beatles White Album.

Very well produced. I really enjoyed it!

jannesan #653703 04/29/21 09:22 AM
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Janne,
Nice chording and musical bed! Fun take on prison blues. Interesting lyrics and your signature performance. Harmonica fits very well. Cool ending. Thank you for sharing.

Misha.

jannesan #653736 04/29/21 01:22 PM
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Hello, 'jannesan'...

I believe there is always something interesting to listen to in any song, and your's is no exception!

I liked the moody feel of the song. It sounded like waves of major and minor chords rising and falling from bar to bar, diatonically or chromatically, now mellow and harmonically reassuring, now tense and aching with that fateful, despairing touch that only the blues can contribute. The melody was filled with chordal surprises, too. The vocal 'mmms' were haunting and added to the weight and richness of the bass track. They also provided a nice contrast to your higher-pitched vocal. The harmonica soloist sounds inevitable. The 'ending' is startling, but was immediately sensible to me in that nothing in the song is resolved musically or lyrically, a feeling that the dissonant guitar strumming communicates in a powerful way.

I sensed darkness in the lyrics. I hope the "work-related resolution" you're waiting for presents itself in a way that will benefit you personally and professionally.

Last edited by bluage; 04/29/21 01:34 PM.

"Music is what feelings sound like."-- borrowed from a Cakewalk Music Creator forum member, "Mamabear".
rayc #653951 05/01/21 04:10 AM
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Originally Posted By: rayc
"forever ticking round
when your days are numbered
but you don't know the count
Waiting's a horizon
only eyes can reach" very well written.
Well done.


Thanks Ray for your kind feedback smile I wrote those chorus words easily and was very satisfied with their expressiveness so I'm very glad that you quoted them.

Janne


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TuneMonger #653952 05/01/21 04:13 AM
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Originally Posted By: TuneMonger
Interesting subject matter, juxtaposed against your unique progression. The harp was a natural, could have used even more of it, I think. Not sure how I felt about the ending, will go back and listen some more.


Thanks TuneMonger for your nice feedback smile I'm glad you liked the harp. I hope the ending has grown on you, it is supposed to express the uncertainty of the waiting.

Janne


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Noel96 #653956 05/01/21 04:21 AM
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Originally Posted By: Noel96
There's a heap of fine imagery in these lyrics. You've really excelled yourself! The "Blues" were definitely a great starting point for a song like this.

COVID sure is an experience that the whole world shares. Whatever country I watch shows from, there is a consistency in language surrounding COVID that transcends everything... flatten curve, quarantine, social distancing, etc. That feeling of imprisonment that you write about is also shared.
Nice work!
All the best,
Noel


Thanks Noel for your very encouraging words smile Glad you found good things in my lyrics. Although the song is not about the COVID pandemic itself, I wanted to reference it with a metaphor, because it fits the current situation well. I didn't think about social distancing, but you are right - it surely feels like imprisonment for many people on Earth.

Janne


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Greg Johnson #653958 05/01/21 04:25 AM
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Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
Very cool!! You have such a unique and wonderful sense of melody......always love hearing the changes you come up with!! I really like the vocal arrangement and processing you used!! Nice work!! Take care. Greg


What Greg said.

Very nice. Enjoyed this!

Steve


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jannesan #654155 05/02/21 10:42 AM
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Firstly, your rhythm arrangement offered us an immediate image of a large clock hanging on a bleak wall with the music accentuating the ticks.

Janice mentioned a bit of a McCartney vibe from some of his early solo albums.

"Droplets falling down
on the stone floor
squeaking when opened
the hatch of the door
Still no decision
just my daily meal
somewhere in a court
my ultimate appeal
the exit or the chair
the end is all I care."

That is a very strong lyric entry as it grabs and immediately engages the listener.

The mix is excellent and that harmonica is in our opinion the best of the harmonica RT's by far.

The weary feel of your vocal added the right touch to all of the above.

Well done!

J&B

jannesan #654162 05/02/21 11:24 AM
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Janne,

I really enjoyed this song. Some of your best lyrics and a great vocal to go along.

Crisp mix as well.

Excellent!

Bob

jannesan #654196 05/02/21 08:31 PM
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Terveisia Janne.
Everything here works well . Band and vocals compliment each other with the interesting lyrics telling a story of frustration, which the listener, (me), can feel and empathize with. I had a few listens and enjoyed the song incrementally more each time . An enjoyable listen Janne.

"through the snowbanks on the beach (snowbanks on the beach)"
I played your song to my partner and she liked it. We actually live by the beach and she is 65 and has never seen snow !

terveiset
Gary.

BlueAttitude #654384 05/04/21 05:33 AM
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Originally Posted By: BlueAttitude
Love the groove happening on this one. Very well written also!

Good production and mix.

Not sure about the ending, but, quite clever what you did there.

Overall very good, enjoyed!


Thanks Dave for your positive comment smile Those RTs really gave a good groove, and at the same time, gave inspiration for the groove of the story.

I hope the ending will grow on you smile

Janne


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BabuMusic #654385 05/04/21 05:42 AM
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Originally Posted By: BabuMusic
Captivating melody and well sung, Janne. Love the way your changes move the song in an enjoyable groove. The harmonica sounds great. I usually get lost picking pieces of Multitracks. I kinda like how the one guitarist doesn't realize the song is over, but feel it should be faded.


Thanks Marty, I appreciate your kind words, especially about my singing smile Glad you liked the harmonica, required quite much work to make it sound decent, because there was one section where there was silence on almost every regeneration, maybe the player didn't like my chord progression smile

Yep, that guitarist is waiting, waiting for the end signal but doesn't know when it will come. Fading wasn't option for me because of the ticking, good to know that my idea wasn't total disaster wink

Janne


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Ezekiel's Storm #654386 05/04/21 05:48 AM
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Originally Posted By: Ezekiel's Storm
For me, first lines are extremely important for drawing the audience in, and you have hit the mark with yours: "Droplets falling down/on the stone floor." That sets up the tone of the lyrics.

The music/instrumentation contrasts with the mood of the lyrics, yet it works so nicely.


Thanks Mr. Storm for your nice comment smile I'm glad you liked the start of the lyrics, that initial scene was clear in my head so it was painless to write the first verse.

I somehow agree with that contrast observation, I was thinking about going for a jazzy direction to get a softer mood, but decided to stay in blues because the scene was stone floor, not very soft... however I tried to tame the aggressive instruments a little.

Janne


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PeterF #654387 05/04/21 05:52 AM
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Originally Posted By: PeterF
Janne

Very strong write, especially the chorus.

As usual an interesting chord backing track and the harmonica works well.

I like the ending, seems to fit the song mood.

Well done.

Peter


Thanks Peter for your kind comment smile I'm glad you liked the harmonica and the ending, ideas for them were born quite late in the production process.

Janne


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David Snyder #654755 05/07/21 06:23 AM
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Originally Posted By: David Snyder

Hey Janne,

This is wonderful. I don't know why but this reminds me a little bit of some of the experimental stuff on the Beatles White Album.

Very well produced. I really enjoyed it!


Thanks David for your very nice comment smile The Beatles mentioned - that's an honor blush

Janne


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Rustyspoon# #654758 05/07/21 06:25 AM
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Originally Posted By: Rustyspoon#
Janne,
Nice chording and musical bed! Fun take on prison blues. Interesting lyrics and your signature performance. Harmonica fits very well. Cool ending. Thank you for sharing.

Misha.


Thanks Misha for your positive feedback smile Glad you accepted the harmonica and the ending.

Janne


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bluage #654760 05/07/21 06:29 AM
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Originally Posted By: bluage
Hello, 'jannesan'...

I believe there is always something interesting to listen to in any song, and your's is no exception!

I liked the moody feel of the song. It sounded like waves of major and minor chords rising and falling from bar to bar, diatonically or chromatically, now mellow and harmonically reassuring, now tense and aching with that fateful, despairing touch that only the blues can contribute. The melody was filled with chordal surprises, too. The vocal 'mmms' were haunting and added to the weight and richness of the bass track. They also provided a nice contrast to your higher-pitched vocal. The harmonica soloist sounds inevitable. The 'ending' is startling, but was immediately sensible to me in that nothing in the song is resolved musically or lyrically, a feeling that the dissonant guitar strumming communicates in a powerful way.

I sensed darkness in the lyrics. I hope the "work-related resolution" you're waiting for presents itself in a way that will benefit you personally and professionally.


Thanks 'bluage', your insightful comments are always pleasure to read, art themselves smile Nice to hear you liked the mmms, they are one of my favorite RTs, fit almost every song. I hope too that the resolution will give a new direction and benefit also.

Janne


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Steve Young #654762 05/07/21 06:30 AM
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Originally Posted By: Steve Young
Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
Very cool!! You have such a unique and wonderful sense of melody......always love hearing the changes you come up with!! I really like the vocal arrangement and processing you used!! Nice work!! Take care. Greg


What Greg said.

Very nice. Enjoyed this!

Steve


Thanks Steve for giving a listen and commenting kindly smile

Janne


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