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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 20,781
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A very sad and delicate touch to a subject that could cause many bad memories to resurface. I lost my best friend in Nam as well as many high school classmates. My hometown had the highest casualties per capita than anywhere else in the US. A very sad time in our history.
But back on the song it was done with respect. I could feel the pain in the vocals. Super mix.
PS - I never was in the service as I was taking shots for asthma and allergies from 1964 to 1970. 1Y then finally 4F.
Me, it's not about how many times you fail, it's about how many times you get back up. Cop, that's not how field sobriety tests work.
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Joined: Sep 2018
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Excellent lyric writing. You certainly captured that time well. I like the melody. It's not one you would expect to go with the words, but it works.
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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 1,081
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Joined: Jun 2012
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Nice tune. Very clear vocal recording. Good lyrics. I like the change up on the last stanza. Good one.
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 1,193
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'Tunemonger'...
Your lyrics are scenically vivid, the music is bittersweet, and your vocalist has a youthful enough voice to suggest an innocence and idealism that could have been severely tested by 'the war'. The feel of the song makes it sound as though it could have been produced during the Vietnam era, not necessarily as an out-and-out protest, but more like a stop, look, and listen kind of experience. The instrumental silence after the second verse was as dramatic as it was unexpected. This song will linger in my mind and heart for awhile.
- bluage -
"Music is what feelings sound like."-- borrowed from a Cakewalk Music Creator forum member, "Mamabear".
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Joined: Feb 2010
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Wow, bluage, you deserve some kind of special achievement for your lengthy critiques. Thanks so very much, it's nice that someone points out all the things one does to try to bring a song to life. Kudos.
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
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Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 18,352
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This is a great write and a great tribute.
It hits home on the terror or war, and he overwhelming demands placed on such very young and innocent people.
BIAB & RB2024 Win.(Audiophile), Sonar Platinum, Cakewalk by Bandlab, Izotope Prod.Bundle, Roland RD-1000, Synthogy Ivory, Kontakt, Focusrite 18i20, KetronSD2, NS40M Monitors, Pioneer Active Monitors, AKG K271 Studio H'phones
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Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 6,892
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Well done!! I like the music and lyrics, but it sounds like the vocal recording has a lot of ambient leak into it........kind of gives it a vibe of that era though!! My brother's number was about to come up when they stopped the draft.......we were relieved!! What a terrible war! Take care. Greg
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Joined: Sep 2016
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Hi TuneMonger,
I read all post on your song. Impressing what memories it brought up on that terrible time. When it all started I lived on Curaçao (A Dutch island in the Carabians) in the 60's. US warships and aircraftcarriers always came visiting us on their way home from Vietnam. And they also had a lot of soldiers aboard that fought overthere.
It was good practise to invite on of them for a day, to give him a 'holi-day'. The soldier we invited showed me his wound. He narrowly survived a sniper attack. I was 10 years old and very impressed by that story. That war became real for me then. But of course in no way comparable with what a lot of you described here, and what was writen in your so good lyrics, TuneMonger!
And I want to share Daves'(Bluage) excellent post on your very good song. It reflects exactly what I think of it too! There is only one tiny thing: In a way I missed a 'real' chorus. What made you decide not to get this in?
Best regards, Hans
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Oh no, Greg, after the song passed muster with the astute ears of fj and rayc, I figured I was home free. But now you tell me the vocal has a lot of ambient leak. I went back and listened to the dry stem solo and didn't hear anything, so I am going to guess the problem is in the way I processed the vocal. And to be honest I threw my hands up in the air and decided it would take somebody with better mixing skills than mine to figure out the problem. So I'm in a bit of a limbo about it. I may give it to a pro to mix. Thanks for pointing out a problem, I appreciate it and would always rather know the truth. I'm curious, though, if anyone else notices the same problem??
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
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Hi Hans,
I did think about the fact that this song was simply the same verse for four verses, with no chorus. I finally decided it stood on its own well enough, and didn't need a chorus. I thought it was strong enough to break a rule. I might be wrong about that and you could easily be right. I'm still pretty happy with it, I just need to figure out how to deal with Greg's observation of it having a noise problem with the vocal track. Your story was interesting, I appreciate that you shared it with everyone. It seems people all over the world were affected by the Vietnam War. Thanks again.
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
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Joined: Sep 2016
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Hi TuneMonger,
Thanks for your explanation about the build up of the song. And I think you are right on it. The message can be watered down by a chorus. It can distract from the message itself.
Hans
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Joined: Aug 2014
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This sounds great TuneMonger. I really enjoyed this. Nice work!
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 5,495
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Nice work, evocative and well produced.
Deserving of all the praise.
Peter
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Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
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Update Your PowerTracks Pro Audio 2024 Today!
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A few excerpts:
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Convenient Ways to Listen to Band-in-a-Box® Songs Created by Program Users!
The User Showcase Forum is an excellent place to share your Band-in-a-Box® songs and listen to songs other program users are creating!
There are other places you can listen to these songs too! Visit our User Showcase page to sort by genre, artist (forum name), song title, and date - each listing will direct you to the forum post for that song.
If you'd rather listen to these songs in one place, head to our Band-in-a-Box® Radio, where you'll have the option to select the genre playlist for your listening pleasure. This page has SoundCloud built in, so it won't redirect you. We've also added the link to the Artists SoundCloud page here, and a link to their forum post.
We hope you find some inspiration from this amazing collection of User Showcase Songs!
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Our User Showcase Forum receives more than 50 posts per day, with people sharing their Band-in-a-Box songs and providing feedback for other songs posted.
Thank you to everyone who has contributed!
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