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#685023 11/24/21 12:26 AM
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Gloria on Youtube

I just released this track about an ill fated young girl never returning home from a summer party.

BIAB part used are:
Piano - Real Track 887 FolkPopPrairie - converted into MIDI and played back using Waves Grand Rhapsody Piano plugin
Bass - Real Track 2489 BowedHeldSimple - converted into MIDI and played back using Waves Bass Finger plugin
Bass - Real Track 539 ElectricPopSw - Rendered as Real Track

Drums, Synths, Strings, ARPs, Guitars and Vocals are done by myself.

Feed back is always welcome

Lyrics added on request

GLORIA

Gloria is a little pale
She totally lost all control of herself
Gloria slowly fades away
She’s fast asleep to the sound of the bells

It was in her drink
And now in her blood
Who knows if she will pull through?
The powder was placed by someone she knew

Gloria at the break of dawn
She doesn’t react to the call of her name
Gloria senses darkness
Her candle inside has a weakening flame

It was in her drink
And now in her blood
Who knows if she will pull through?
The powder was placed by someone she knew

Inside of her mind she’s constantly falling
A grain of dust that falls down the universe
She’s trying to fly but keeps on stalling
The beat of her heart gets weaker from every breath

Gloria she don’t answer
Her friend has texted her a hundred times
Gloria – if someone finds her
She may have a chance to get out alive

Inside of her mind she’s constantly falling
A grain of dust that falls down the universe
She’s trying to fly but keeps on stalling
The beat of her heart gets weaker from every breath

It was in her drink
And now in her blood
Who knows if she will pull through?
The powder was placed by someone she knew

Gloria is a little pale
You can’t really tell if she’s smiling or sad

Inside of her mind she’s constantly falling
A grain of dust that falls down the universe
She’s trying to fly but keeps on stalling
The beat of her heart gets weaker from every breath

Last edited by Peters Garage; 11/25/21 12:13 AM. Reason: Lyrics added

MacMini M1 - BIAB2021 - Logic Pro X - iZotope Music Production Suite - Scaler 2 - far too many Waves plugins and Line 6 Guitars and boards + a fantastic Yamaha THR10ll mini Amp - Avid MBOX Studio

Peters' Garage is available on all major streaming services
Peters Garage #685028 11/24/21 01:21 AM
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interesting song.
There's something strident or grating in your vocal...it may be the treatment used but I suspect it could be be addressed with a little subtractive EQ to give it a more rounded feel & sound.
The sound is most obvious on sibilant sounds.

Good song, good performances though the drums sound like they were overdubbed close to the songs finish.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
Peters Garage #685029 11/24/21 01:22 AM
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Pretty good

rayc #685121 11/24/21 06:12 AM
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Originally Posted By: rayc
interesting song.
There's something strident or grating in your vocal...it may be the treatment used but I suspect it could be be addressed with a little subtractive EQ to give it a more rounded feel & sound.
The sound is most obvious on sibilant sounds.

Good song, good performances though the drums sound like they were overdubbed close to the songs finish.


Thank you for constructive feed back.

I did struggle a lot with the whole audio balance in the mastering phase - it had to redo my final mix 11 times, and still with a few things I weren't able to solve - strong sibilants in the vocal being one of them. I had to make "either or" choices in the combination of deEssing and saturation to bring more life to the vocals.

That's the result of editing the Auto Drummer in Logic Pro X....I tried hard to keep it simple (but obviously not hard enough) :-)


MacMini M1 - BIAB2021 - Logic Pro X - iZotope Music Production Suite - Scaler 2 - far too many Waves plugins and Line 6 Guitars and boards + a fantastic Yamaha THR10ll mini Amp - Avid MBOX Studio

Peters' Garage is available on all major streaming services
Peters Garage #685182 11/24/21 09:20 AM
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Good song, it reminds me of the musical Spring Awakening. The vocals sounded a bit overprocessed to me, but it wasn't a major detraction. A matter of taste, really. Very good effort overall.


Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
Peters Garage #685271 11/24/21 04:42 PM
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If you manually edit the sibilant sounds using a preFX volume envelope, (or the Clip Gain feature), you'll get a better result. You can also look at using the saturation by sending the audio to a saturation track and EQing that saturation track to reduce the sibilant emphasis. In the end I think the saturation may be what's causing the strident/unpleasant edge to your voice which means TOO MUCH saturation added to the track.
The drums aren't over complicated, rather, they seem to be added to instead of being integrated into and that propelling the song.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
Peters Garage #685319 11/24/21 10:51 PM
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Sounds nice, Peter. Could you maybe add the lyrics to your post?

Cheers,

Stefan

Peters Garage #685327 11/25/21 12:11 AM
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Hi Ray and Tune Monger,

so less vocal processing and a more gentle hand on the saturation knob, that's a good takeaway. (unfortunately I already submitted my December release with a similar vocal processing chain - so from 2022 your suggestions should be audible.)

The drums - any suggestion on how these could have been better integrated?

Again thank you for taking the time to provide valuable feed back.


MacMini M1 - BIAB2021 - Logic Pro X - iZotope Music Production Suite - Scaler 2 - far too many Waves plugins and Line 6 Guitars and boards + a fantastic Yamaha THR10ll mini Amp - Avid MBOX Studio

Peters' Garage is available on all major streaming services
Peters Garage #685390 11/25/21 06:56 AM
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Synths create a haunting atmosphere around the dark and very sad story. Introduction of the drums and bass works well, I enjoyed the vocals and the short guitar solo. Interesting chord progression adds to the troubled mood. Would be a good theme song for a Nordic noir TV series.

Janne


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Peters Garage #685414 11/25/21 08:26 AM
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Hello Peter
Very well done song
The song structure is really good
I like the melody very much
Great job
Many greetings
Andi ;-)

Peters Garage #685482 11/25/21 01:28 PM
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Originally Posted By: Peters Garage
Hi Ray and Tune Monger,
The drums - any suggestion on how these could have been better integrated?

If you sketch your song in BIAB, structure etc. you'll have a simple/effective drum track. I'd use that drum track to base the drum programming upon. Write with your preferred midi drums starting with the midi from BIAB or referring to the BIAB drum track. Levels and beats particularly. Adding accents will be better in line etc.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
Peters Garage #685642 11/26/21 09:01 AM
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Good song, cool sound. The arrangement is a good match to the lyric, and stays interesting throughout.

The doubling of the vocal at 2:00 works really well. Great use of stereo effects as well.

The lyric kept me engaged to the end - all around, really well done.


-- David Cuny
My virtual singer development blog

Vocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?
Peters Garage #685688 11/26/21 11:37 AM
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Jannesan, Project M and duchy

Thank you for your kind words, and thank you for taking your time to comment

Cheers
Peter


MacMini M1 - BIAB2021 - Logic Pro X - iZotope Music Production Suite - Scaler 2 - far too many Waves plugins and Line 6 Guitars and boards + a fantastic Yamaha THR10ll mini Amp - Avid MBOX Studio

Peters' Garage is available on all major streaming services
rayc #685689 11/26/21 11:39 AM
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Originally Posted By: rayc
Originally Posted By: Peters Garage
Hi Ray and Tune Monger,
The drums - any suggestion on how these could have been better integrated?

If you sketch your song in BIAB, structure etc. you'll have a simple/effective drum track. I'd use that drum track to base the drum programming upon. Write with your preferred midi drums starting with the midi from BIAB or referring to the BIAB drum track. Levels and beats particularly. Adding accents will be better in line etc.


OK - I get your point here - so export the drums as MIDI, and use what ever drum plugin I have and work with it from there. That makes a lot of sense

Cheers
Peter


MacMini M1 - BIAB2021 - Logic Pro X - iZotope Music Production Suite - Scaler 2 - far too many Waves plugins and Line 6 Guitars and boards + a fantastic Yamaha THR10ll mini Amp - Avid MBOX Studio

Peters' Garage is available on all major streaming services
Peters Garage #685800 11/27/21 03:48 AM
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Good song, Peter. Your garage sounds like a fun place to play. I really like the build of the song. There is nothing I can add to the other comments here about the mix/production. I kinda like the vocal processed as you did. When I first pushed Play, I noticed it was almost 6 minutes long. When I reached then end, I was disappointed it was over.


Enjoy whatever happens!
marty

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Peters Garage #685918 11/27/21 02:32 PM
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Hello Peter ...

An interesting song that I liked a lot. A poignant story but a good delivery of the song. Very nice! Nest to you ...

Alan


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Peters Garage #685923 11/27/21 02:48 PM
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I like this!

Some standouts:
Singing
Melody (stays with you)
Instrumentation/production

thanks for sharing

Peters Garage #686043 11/28/21 08:16 AM
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Very pretty song. Cool backtrack and vocal. Well done


Scott Collingwood
https://soundcloud.com/scottt709
https://soundcloud.com/spiritlevel-ca
https://www.youtube.com/@SpiritLevel-ge3hm/
Peters Garage #687631 12/03/21 08:58 AM
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Babu, Al-David, Ezekieln and Scott -thank you for your kind replies and thank you for taking the time to list and comment on my track :-)


MacMini M1 - BIAB2021 - Logic Pro X - iZotope Music Production Suite - Scaler 2 - far too many Waves plugins and Line 6 Guitars and boards + a fantastic Yamaha THR10ll mini Amp - Avid MBOX Studio

Peters' Garage is available on all major streaming services
Peters Garage #687638 12/03/21 09:08 AM
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I like many things about this.

I like the simplicity.

And the sparse feel.

And the choice of instruments.

I like the vocal--the processing to me sounds right for this mix. It would not work as well if it were cleaner.

I like the feel.

All in all I think this is a very successful Indie song and I could hear it in a movie.

The mix is great to me. Subtle.

Wise choices.

More please.

smile

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