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#715928 05/06/22 08:05 PM
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Been away from the forum, for a while, in order to search for inspiration. Here's what I've been able to come up with. I'm sorry it's not a happy song, like I promised I'd try to write, but ... see how you feel about it, if you like - thanks.

An Old Man

LYRICS:

He's an old man now
He looks at his memories of you, somehow,
And he tries so hard not to forget you ... you know ...

He was once young
He loved so hard, it now feels quite dumb
To remember just how his heart broke
When you left his life ...

He wanted you for his wife ... he wanted you for his wife ...

He's an old man now
He prays to God to let you know, somehow,
That he still cares so much for you ... you know ...

And he wants you to know
That, if you write, he will jump for joy
He will not hold it against you in any way ... you know ...

And he prays
He asks every friend that he sees on his ways
If they've heard news of you ... "nothing", they say ...

And would they let you know
That's it's ok to write him, if you want it so,
That he wants no more than friendship, if you won't give him more ... you know ...

He's an old man now
He doesn't know that you're happy now
That you've forgotten him and your love for him long ago ...

And he looks at his life ...

And he looks at his life,
With a wry smile, shaking his head in pain,
Looking at the time he met you, once again ...

And he sighs ...

He wanted you for his wife.

He wanted you for his wife.


THE BAND:

****** Song Summary *************
Title: An Old Man - 7 May 2022
File:An Old Man - 7 May 2022.SGU
Key=C , Tempo 70, Length (m:s)=3:39
No intro. 60 bar chorus, from bar 1 to bar 60. Repeat x1 chorus
No Melody
No Soloist track.
Song is saved with Volume, Pan, Reverb, Chorus, Bank0,
Style is _BLUEINK.STY (Blue Ink Slow Songwriter Strum)

RealTracks in style: 1036:Bass, Electric, NorthernRockBallad Ev 065
RealTracks in style: ~1639:Piano, Electric, Rhythm JazzFunkBreezy Ev16 075
RealTracks in style: 869:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm ModernRnBRockWarmA-B Ev 065
RealTracks in style: 1004:Guitar, 12-String Acoustic, Rhythm ClassicRockStrumming Ev16 065
RealDrums in style:NashvilleBrushesEasyBluegrass: a: Sidestick, Brushes b: Brushes, Stick

*******************

Voice recorded and mixed in Mixcraft Pro Studio 9, with no additional effects whatsoever.

musician17 #715940 05/07/22 12:54 AM
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Hello James
very sad song
But great implemented
The background track and the spoken lyrics fit well together
Great work
Many greetings
Andi ;-)

musician17 #715956 05/07/22 02:08 AM
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Thank you, Andi - much appreciated!

musician17 #716068 05/08/22 07:14 AM
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Very sad lyric James. Super vocal delivery. Instrumentation was very well done.


Scott Collingwood
https://soundcloud.com/scottt709
https://soundcloud.com/spiritlevel-ca
https://www.youtube.com/@SpiritLevel-ge3hm/
musician17 #716076 05/08/22 07:37 AM
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Sometimes things are sad.
This is a good glimpse of that emotion.

moto

musician17 #716166 05/08/22 07:05 PM
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Thank you, Scott and Captain Moto. So nice and kind of you to listen and comment.

musician17 #716231 05/09/22 06:05 AM
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Very interesting song!

It is different, for sure, but very unique and creative.

Thanks for posting!

smile

musician17 #716233 05/09/22 06:53 AM
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I agree with David. Very creative. I love a story song and this is a good one. Thanks for sharing.

Rick


It needs more cowbell!

https://therickhansenband.com
musician17 #716334 05/09/22 08:38 PM
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Thank you, David and Rick. So happy you liked it!

musician17 #716361 05/10/22 04:03 AM
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Ah, James, never leave the forum to search for inspiration. There is plenty here and YOU are a big part of it. This song is a good example of that. I love the story and the way you tell it, the words you use, and how you masterfully place it all over the perfect music softly played.


Enjoy whatever happens!
marty

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musician17 #716367 05/10/22 04:25 AM
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A tragic and uniquely original work, and your vocals are sincere. I sense that you needed to write this.
If this is your story, press on and find your joy.


https://soundcloud.com/user-646279677
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musician17 #716450 05/11/22 01:19 AM
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Hi James,

I can recall you wrote not wanting to make these kind of songs anymore. I wrote back that these songs are so characteristic of you, or similair words. And here you are again with another very sensitive song with very good lyrics!
Only your singing sounds clearer every time (despite the sad story), so that's some progress you made in time.

I had to smile a bit about the 'cheatty' rhyme you used:
...of you, somehow,
And he tries so hard not to forget you ... you know ...

The way you pronounced 'you know' came close to 'somehow'. That was very nice!

So take Martys' advise and stay on the forum for creative ideas and be a young man...

Hans


Hans Berkhout
(Birchwood)
https://soundcloud.com/user-296497130
musician17 #716484 05/11/22 06:30 AM
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Thank you, Marty, Bass Thumper and Hans!

Marty: you are spot on, so much inspiration here, indeed! Just wanted to clear my head a little, temporarily so ... but yes, so much good music here, it's a pity to miss it! Thanks for such kind words!

Bass Thumper: thanks :-) Yes, this needed to be written, for me!

Hans: thank you :-) I remember well your words, and yes, time has proven you right. I still intend to write an upbeat song, though ... one of these days! :-) And yes, I'll stay on the forum ... any absence of mine is just temporary :-)

Thanks so much, each and every one of you, for listening and for such kind, detailed and perceptive comments!

musician17 #716505 05/11/22 01:00 PM
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Well done James,
melancholy is important if for no other reason than contrast.
A very characteristic set of chords and arrangement.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
musician17 #716512 05/11/22 02:17 PM
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James,
Interesting & sad tune. Sadness, is in a way a great inspirer. Interesting progression, works well. I think adding a little reverb to vocals would glue the mix a bit better. Thank you for sharing.
Misha.

musician17 #716524 05/11/22 03:25 PM
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James

Nicely constructed and very much a "signature" sound.

Well done.

peter

musician17 #716648 05/12/22 10:09 AM
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Thanks Ray, Misha and Peter. Yes, a "signature sound", as you correctly state, Peter ... hopefully I can "break the mold" a little, next time, with a truly overdue "upbeat" song? We shall see :-) Thanks so much, in the meantime, for listening and for your very, very kind comments!

musician17 #716660 05/12/22 11:56 AM
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A very special song and the "talking delivery" really worked.

Rob


We are Rob Meulman and Anne-Marie Bovenkamp from The Netherlands.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1gsdNLE7_Gy8qavoOplQow/videos
http://rnam.net/


musician17 #716802 05/13/22 09:31 AM
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The sincerity of your delivery of the sad lyrics is very believable, James.

Your spoken word, the progression and the BiaB tracks are perfect for this lonesome but lovely song.

Well done,

J&B

musician17 #716832 05/13/22 01:23 PM
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I agree. The delivery was excellent.


Link: www.soundcloud.com/ed_shaw (Feel Free to Use)
https://drooble.com/edward.shaw/hymn/index.htm
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