OK, OK Yes David, you win both first and second prizes ...

Rummaging right now through my drawer of free tickets ... let's see ... Liberia, no I don't think you want that one, oh ... here's Cameroon, Sierra Leone, oops, same problem.

Wait! Here's an envelope with two tickets to Lagos from a guy in Nigeria who claims to be the custodian of a huge sum of money; just fly there and pick it up ...

Willington, Willamantic, ..., let me get back to you. Weehauken. I know they're in this mess somewhere.

Dean