Great advice . . . and that's what I've done, hopefully more apparent in the updated version. You are spot on regarding the distance from the microphone. For some reason, I've been moving further and further away from it when recording (overly concerned about the sibilance among other things maybe).

I did a revised take real close to the mic recording at a lower volume. I probably still haven't nailed it, but I think it's made a difference here (and certainly on the next song I hope to post in the next day or so).

Thanks again!