Charlie,

A good selection of instruments for this. A few suggestions - though, you may not be looking for suggestions...

For a song such as this (sad, gentle, etc) the drums are a little "heavy" in the early verses. Using the Stick, Hi-Hat version instead of the Snare, Hi-Hat version would "fit" the lyric. Also limiting the drum rolls (part markers) early on - sounds like you have them every 4 measures - every 8 might work. Then, bring the Snare version in on the last verse... so your song "builds"...

The words are difficult to make out at various points. The vocal is a tad too low for the amount of reverb that is on it - so it is "falling behind" the instruments.

I like what you're doing on this. Hope you don't mind the thoughts...

floyd