Relaxing during the playing is crucial. If you can do it at home but not in front of an audience, you are not relaxed in the stage scenario.

You must be keeping those muscles rigid as you play and even when you're not....

I found it useful, when I first started playing in front of people, to let go of the neck between songs and even in the middle of songs where you have even a one or two second opportunity to do so such as a held note by a singer...... letting go of the neck and even shaking the hand out, relaxes those muscles. If you hold the neck you may be subconsciously squeezing the neck and that keeps those muscles tight..... you don't want that. Let go of the neck and open and close your fist, extending the fingers fully several times and then grab that neck and go for the next section of the song.

You can find my music at:
www.herbhartley.com
Add nothing that adds nothing to the music.
You can make excuses or you can make progress but not both.

The magic you are looking for is in the work you are avoiding.