Chris,
When mixing, there's one thing that I always keep in mind. This is that the brain grows tired very quickly and, when this happens, perceptions of 'what sounds good' distort.
For example, from reading your post, I get the impression that you are so focused on the strings at the moment that even if they were reasonably quiet in the mix, they would still sound comparatively loud to you because your brain has tuned-in into their sound and this focus overrides how the mix really sounds.
In my own work, I find it's very important to take about an hour's break after every 20 - 30 minutes of mixing. I also don't worry too much about reverb, delay, etc., until the final stages. Generally, I just use a small amount of medium length reverb - just enough to add a bit of an echo to the sound.
With the above in mind, my approach is...
1. Solo the main backing instrument and bring it up to a volume that sounds comfortable to me.
2. Raise the volumes of the other backing instruments until I get a sound balance that I like. Now I have a rest for 60 minutes.
3. I then re-listen to my mix of backing instruments. If it doesn't sound quite right, I repeat steps 2 and 3 until it does. When the mix of backing instruments finally sounds good, it is at this point that I move on to adding the strings.
4. Now I bring the strings up in the mix until I think they sound ok (I don't worry about tweaking too much at this point).
5. After 20 minutes of balancing strings, I put the mix away and come back to it about 60 minutes later. (During this time, I usually work on another song.)
6. After 60 or so minutes, I listen to the mix again and tweak the strings slightly so that they fit my perception of what 'balanced' should sound like. Again I only spend around 20 minutes on it. (NOTE: I only tweak strings at this point because all other backing instruments have been previously balanced and I do not change them.)
7. Now I put the mix away for 24 hours.
8. When I return to the mix after having not heard it for a day, I play it through once. While it's playing, I make a note of what bars I need to adjust. I write these changes down using bar numbers and up and down arrows because they are quick and they tell me which direction I need to adjust the volumes. My aim is to make these notes as quickly as possible so that I don't get distracted too much from listening to the music.
9. Using the notes I've just made from playing the mix through after having a long rest, I play the mix again and make the adjustments I heard.
10. When I have the mix sounding reasonable to my ears. I again put it aside for 24 hours and don't listen to it.
11. I now repeat steps 8, 9, 10. By the end of this, the mix is starting to home in on what sounds good. Eventually, after I've repeated 8, 9, 10 a couple of times, I find that I'm happy with what I hear after having had a 24 hour break. At this point, I consider the job pretty much done.
I find mixing a very slow process because it is so easy for the ear to start hearing everything as 'normal'. Rather than mixing, for me it is the rests between mixing that are the most important aspect of getting a good mix together.
Hope this helps,
Noel
I'm not an expert mixer by any stretch of the imagination but if you want to have a listen to a couple of my songs in which I have used strings just so you can hear what sounds balanced to me....
...this first one uses piano as the main instrument with a full midi-based string orchestra sound in the background...
...and this second one is a co-write with Janice and Bud Merritt that uses a single 'cello BIAB Realtrack against guitar to interplay with Janice's singing.
In both songs, the strings come in about halfway through.
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