As the former Chief Training Instructor I taught this for heating problems. Some statements are givens.

1. Go to the top.
2. Tools required, Turn out Gear as specified in XX.y, SCBA, AXE, min 1 3/4 in charged hose line with 100 psi nozzle pressure.
3. Remove window, screen, any draperies or window treatments with the axe, taking care NOT to have glass fall without warning.
4. About 8 feet from the opening use a cone of water to expel heat (smoke).
5. When opening the nozzle, get confirmation that the bottom is open. (To allow air in).
6. Carefully check that people outside are in range.
The scores for hitting people with water are:

1. The mayor, 10000 points and free pizza for a year.
2. Council members 300 points each.
3. Whiny liberal / socialist council members 200 points extra.
4. Cops, 500 points plus 100 more for each level, ie Sgt. Staff Sgt. so on.
5. Police Chief, 700 points.
6. Fire Chief, 1000 points.
7. Media 500 points.
8. Platoon or District Chiefs 600 points.
9. Captains 500 points.
10. By-standers 100 points each.

To work properly the person must react, and be HIT with water, not just in the spray from the wind.

All efforts to ensure this hosing down is an accident must be taken so as not to get caught.

Stations and Platoon shifts shall record this on the top left of the chalkboard as in
Blue A
Red B
Green C
Orange D

As I worked on Blue A Platoon for many years we usually won. I will never admit to having a female reporter friend phone the mayor about a fire, and then scoring big. I do not think that is in my makeup.

And now for something completely but not quite indifferent.

John Conley
Musica est vita