TM,

A good write. A relatable story line.

Nice rocker. Love the guitars!

Your vocalist has a good Rock voice. I think it's a bit loud - could be tucked into the mix a bit more.
The high-end EQ is pretty "crisp" (I'd roll off quite a bit of that highEQ - that might be just the thing to reduce the volume slightly and get it down into the mix more).

I like your sense of "commercial" songwriting. Catchy. Good stuff...

fj