Hi Vic,

I was very pleased you took the time to help me achieve better lyrics.
So of course I'm not offended. Not at all!
My reaction was meant as a very serious answer on all your suggestions.
Maybe that anwer could have given you the impression I was not amused, but that is not at all the case.
Of course I could have said "thanks Vic" and leave everything as it is, but I'm not like that.
So thanks again and please keep making 'sharp' comments about my songs, lyrics, pronunciation or whatever.

Nice day,
Hans


Originally Posted by vicarn
Hullo Hans.
My suggestions are how I would write it so it sounds smooth to me.

Re the chorus: It does sound "correct" but sounding "correct" is sometimes not enough in a song.
A formal letter from a lawyer may sound "correct" but would you talk or sing the same way?

The phrase "come morning" is an artistic way of saying "when morning comes".

I hope you are not offended by my comments. It is your song so you must write how you feel it.
Regards,
Vic

Hans Berkhout
(Birchwood)
https://soundcloud.com/user-296497130