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#307348 - 08/17/15 10:31 AM [User Showcase] NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams
Registered: 08/03/14
Posts: 38
Loc: Iowa
JPeden73 Offline
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Registered: 08/03/14
Posts: 38
Loc: Iowa
Well I finally had some time to finish another song that I've been working on. I had a tougher time with this one as it came along pretty slowly over the past few months and has undergone many revisions.

Here are the tracks used:

Drums: NashvilleEven16
Percussion: Loop - Conga 8ths
Bass: Electric Pop Sync Ev 135 ~521
Ac Guitar: Acoustic Syncopated Sugar Ev 102 ~380
El Guitar: Electric Rhythm Dire Ev 085 ~508
Piano: Acoustic Rhythm Pop16 Ev16 085 ~1767

I originally tried a realtrack guitar solo throughout but couldn't get it right so replaced it with sax of course)) The first five notes of the sax riff are Dream, Dream, Dream from the Everly's if you can spot them.

Any way here it is: When I See You in My Dreams
As always, thanks for finding the time to listen.


Lyrics for those interested:

Just the other night
I woke up dreaming
or it could've been that I
was make-believing it was true.
Then you faded out of view.

Some dreams you don't recall.
Others keep returning.
Like the stars that fall
the brightest ones keep burning thru
igniting memories anew.

I get a sweet surprise each time I close my eyes
and drift away.

When I see you in my dreams
you take me there again
back where it all began.
When I see you in my dreams
reliving every frame
it always goes the same.
Variations on a theme
each time I see you in my dreams.

I should find a way.
Maybe tomorrow I will
throw these dreams away
and cast aside the sorrow too.
It's not an easy thing to do.

'Cause when I close my eyes
I will find you in the corner of my mind.

When I see you in my dreams
you take me there again
back where it all began.
When I see you in my dreams
I'll hear you say the lines
hold onto every word
until you find away
until you can't be heard.
And there's static on the screen
every time I see you in my dreams

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#307358 - 08/17/15 12:01 PM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 10773
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
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Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 10773
Loc: Florida
Jeff,

This is really nice.

Your writing is so "comfortable" - simple, but not trite - a real skill - Fogelberg did that ...Jackson Browne does that. Nice.

Your vocal is a delight to listen to (nicely recorded, too). Nice harmonies.

The arrangement and mix are excellent. Your sax is sweet (although a little "bright" compared to everything else in the mix).

A great listen.

floyd

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#307373 - 08/17/15 01:40 PM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 05/02/14
Posts: 3988
Loc: The Netherlands
RnAM Offline
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Registered: 05/02/14
Posts: 3988
Loc: The Netherlands
Hello Jeff,

We are very pleasantly surprised to hear such a quality song!
The lead vocal (which has a striking similarity with Timothy B Schmit) is top notch. The backing vocals (again sound very much like the Eagles) are also very professional.
One little nit, and we agree with Floyd on this, the sax is slightly too loud and too bright in the mix.
Looking forward to hearing more of you.

Rob and Anne-Marie
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#307385 - 08/17/15 03:24 PM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 08/04/15
Posts: 84
mwgilbert Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 08/04/15
Posts: 84
Very nicely done. It is harder than it appears to write a convincing pop song, and you have done just that. The arrangement is simple and works in support of the song, and you sing well, solo and backup.

I agree with the previous poster - the sax is a bit too prominent. I'll also bet if you worked at it, you might find a better RealTrack that would make a solo that fit in a bit better, but that's also a taste judgement.

All in all, good listen.

-MWG
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#307393 - 08/17/15 07:33 PM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 09/27/10
Posts: 5606
Loc: Sacramento, California
dcuny Offline
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Registered: 09/27/10
Posts: 5606
Loc: Sacramento, California
Very pleasant, catchy pop!

I agree with the previous posters about the sax, as well as all the positive things they've said.
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#307394 - 08/17/15 07:38 PM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 04/07/13
Posts: 7625
Loc: South Carolina
Charlie Fogle Offline
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Registered: 04/07/13
Posts: 7625
Loc: South Carolina
Top notch at every level. Very professionally done. I agree that your vocals have the Eagles vibe to them which made your song that much more fun to listen to. Great job. Enjoyed this one from start to finish.

Charlie
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#307410 - 08/17/15 09:34 PM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 02/11/05
Posts: 2646
Loc: Kentucky
PgFantastic Offline
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Registered: 02/11/05
Posts: 2646
Loc: Kentucky
SUPERB WORK; great vocal; and the production sounds great; thanks for sharing!
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#307417 - 08/18/15 01:44 AM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 12/06/03
Posts: 5145
Loc: Sydney Australia
PeterF Offline
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Registered: 12/06/03
Posts: 5145
Loc: Sydney Australia
Very nice. And like everyone else the vocals and harmonies were excellent.

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#307476 - 08/18/15 08:00 AM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 12731
Loc: GA USA
Janice & Bud Offline
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Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 12731
Loc: GA USA
"Some dreams you don't recall.
Others keep returning.
Like the stars that fall
the brightest ones keep burning thru
igniting memories anew.'

Outstanding. floyd mentioned Jackson Browne and we
also feel that -- the fluidity of it all is very impressive
and nice to the ears. The mix is super clean all the way
around. Very nice harmony.

Superb!

J&B
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#307525 - 08/18/15 03:57 PM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: Janice & Bud]
Registered: 08/03/14
Posts: 38
Loc: Iowa
JPeden73 Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 08/03/14
Posts: 38
Loc: Iowa
Thanks to all for the generous feedback -- valuable as always. Several commented on the sax being a bit too loud in the mix and I would agree as well. I'm still searching for the best way to record and mix the sax into the BiaB stuff. I'll keep trying)))

Floyd, Janice and Bud - Thanks for your comments about the lyrics. You guys have certainly provided several great examples on this forum in that regard.

Rob and Anne-Marie - Thanks for listening and for the flattering comparison. I certainly aspire to reach your professional level of production.

MWG - Thanks your feedback on the arrangement. Glad it worked for you.

David - Thanks for taking the time. Greatly appreciated.

Charlie - I always appreciate an Eagles reference. One of my favorites)))

Robert - Thanks for the comments and good luck with your project.

Peter - Thank you for the kind feedback.

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#307625 - 08/19/15 04:52 PM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 18688
Loc: Hamlin NY
MarioD Offline
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Registered: 12/27/03
Posts: 18688
Loc: Hamlin NY
Everything that I wanted to say already has been said.

You vocals are outstanding! As are your harmonies!

I would not replace the sax. I would just add a little EQ to it.

Super song!
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when you hurt no one sees your pain
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#307814 - 08/21/15 09:33 AM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 07/10/15
Posts: 2212
Loc: Cow Country, Florida
Planobilly Offline
Veteran

Registered: 07/10/15
Posts: 2212
Loc: Cow Country, Florida
Hi Jeff,

Very good vocal and lyrical content. The harmonies were very well done.

Very nice song to listen to.



Cheers,

Billy
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#307816 - 08/21/15 09:38 AM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: JPeden73]
Registered: 08/20/11
Posts: 9529
Loc: Winston-Salem, NC USA
Jim Fogle Offline
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Registered: 08/20/11
Posts: 9529
Loc: Winston-Salem, NC USA
Jeff,

Nice sounding production and a well crafted song. As others have pointed out the sax is too prominent as compared to your vocals. I agree with Mario that using EQ to cut some high frequencies might help. Curious if the sax RealTrack was the inspiration to do the modulations? It is very interesting when you did them.

Really enjoy hearing your lead and harmony vocals. Boy but your voice sits well in that mix. Very difficult to do but you just nailed it.

This is a really good song to listen to. In fact I'm going to listen again.
_________________________
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#307860 - 08/21/15 05:12 PM [User Showcase] Re: NEW TRACK: When I See You in My Dreams [Re: Jim Fogle]
Registered: 08/03/14
Posts: 38
Loc: Iowa
JPeden73 Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 08/03/14
Posts: 38
Loc: Iowa
Mario - I agree with the EQ on the sax. I am still tinkering with the best way to record and mix wind instruments. Thanks for listening and for the kind comments.

Billy - Thanks for your comments and for the listen.

Jim - The modulation came first (G to E) and originally I had a guitar Realtrack doing the interludes. But I couldn't come up with something I liked, so I recorded myself on the sax at the last minute - hence the issues with being too bright. Thanks for the feedback. Most appreciated.

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