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Here's another co-write with my guitar student Kathy.

I had been messing around with the progression and played it for her. We then discussed some ideas for lyrics and within a day she e-mailed me a lyric sheet, I made some changes to some of the lyrics and then spent a day or so working on the melody... That was a month ago today.

I am enjoying the collaboration process as I haven't done that for quite some time and her & I seem to work well together. (She's a lyric writing machine!) grin

All RT's are listed below. All lead guitar parts are either my Tele (Trigger) or my Strat (Tichiwa), My Martin (Dean) has a strumming track too. I'm doing all the vocals as well.

As always all comments welcome.

https://soundcloud.com/user-813802595/second-thoughts

RD NashBrushBalDbkEv16^1
RT 1825 Bass
RT 368 Guitar Acoustic Strumming
RT 1595 Guitar Acoustic Fingerpicking
RT 1035 Banjo
RT 1602 Piano
RT 1805 Synth Pad


©2018 Greg Achord & Kathy Clifford

Second Thoughts


Never felt like looking back before
Always knew it was you I do adore

Failed to cry when it broke my heart
That doesn't mean it's not tearing me apart

A second guess it can cause a near miss
All I think about is our first kiss

(Chorus)
You can’t fake this…I’ve already tried
Like goosebumps on the arm…Impossible to hide
You can’t fake this…I’ve already tried
Like a breeze on a summer day…Impossible to ride

I thought of kneeling down and saying a prayer
Hoping deep inside that you still care

A moment passed never thought of again
Is It too late have we lost what might have been

I keep lookin' back cause I think there's a chance
Could there still be fire in this romance

(Chorus)

Ending
La la la…la la la la la….la la la….la la la la la
La la la…la la la la la….la la la….la la la la la
La la la…la la la la la….la la la….la la la la la
La la la…la la la la la….la la la….la la la la la

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This is a really great song. I especially enjoyed the lyrics, "I thought of kneeling down and saying a prayer. Hoping deep inside that you still care." Very strong. Thanks for sharing.


Cheers,
Ember
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Achordocaster,

Great opening, and nice work on the vocals. Love the second verse; great lines. And equally, nice lines in that chorus. Really well done collaboration. Enjoyed my listen a ton!

Best regards,

Deej

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Very cool song Greg. Guitar was excellent. Loved the lyrics and excellent delivery. Super co-write.


Scott Collingwood
https://soundcloud.com/scottt709
https://soundcloud.com/spiritlevel-ca
https://www.youtube.com/@SpiritLevel-ge3hm/
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Thanks for sharing this with us Achordocaster! I really enjoyed the progression. The banjo is a great touch and overall very pleasant to listen to. Well done!


Cheers,
Joe
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One of the things I liked about your song was how on the third line of your chorus you varied the melody instead of simply repeating is as most songs do. Really good guitar work, and I liked the banjo in the background.

I’m not a big fan of the la-la-la type of lyric substitution.. for my taste, I would add a different instrumental sound instead of the vocal there, but you had some nice harmonies to take advantage of that approach. Also, I would have taken it out with a fade..maybe you didn’t intend to leave that little ending segment in there..

Thanks for sharing!

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Nice write, arrangement and vocal/guitar performances....

We enjoyed the listen!

J&B

PS Cool guitar names smile

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Originally Posted By: Ember - PG Music
This is a really great song. I especially enjoyed the lyrics, "I thought of kneeling down and saying a prayer. Hoping deep inside that you still care." Very strong. Thanks for sharing.


Thank you Ember that's very nice. I appreciate the listen


Originally Posted By: Deej56
Achordocaster,

Great opening, and nice work on the vocals. Love the second verse; great lines. And equally, nice lines in that chorus. Really well done collaboration. Enjoyed my listen a ton!

Best regards,

Deej


Hey Deej, Thanks for the kind words & the listen.


Originally Posted By: Scott C
Very cool song Greg. Guitar was excellent. Loved the lyrics and excellent delivery. Super co-write.


Thanks Scott, appreciate it. On behalf of Kathy too.


Originally Posted By: Joe -PG Music
Thanks for sharing this with us Achordocaster! I really enjoyed the progression. The banjo is a great touch and overall very pleasant to listen to. Well done!


Your welcome Joe, and thanks for the listen. I'm quite fond of using a little banjo in the background. grin

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It's a very cool collaboration.
Nice BIAB arrangement and well played addition stuff.
The only nit I would pick is that the very 1st syllable is weak in comparison to the rest of the line - that'd only take a 10 tweak to fix then you have a dead set classic 70s singer songwriter piece.


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rayc
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Great production on this. Very pro sound.
SD

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Very cool!! Really taps into the era of music that I love. Nice write, great vocal, and top production/mix. Everything works!! Take care. Greg

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Greg & Kathy,

A really nice song. Sounds like an old favorite...

Excellent arrangement and mix. Nice vocals and harmony.

Nice.

fj

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I really enjoyed this one. I liked the mix, chord progression, instrumentation, lyric and your vocal.

This sounded like something that I would have in my oldies collection.


I just posted a selfie and all of the responses were get well soon!

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Originally Posted By: Ember - PG Music
This is a really great song. I especially enjoyed the lyrics, "I thought of kneeling down and saying a prayer. Hoping deep inside that you still care." Very strong. Thanks for sharing.


My thoughts exactly. Oddly, these exact lyrics were playing out as the song was playing on SoundCloud and I was commenting.

You are still one of my favorite vocalists here on the forum and I'm really getting into your melodies.

Enjoyed listening.


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Greg & Kathy,

Excellent song! Love the strong vocals and overall mix.

Really well done.

Bob

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I enjoyed the listen. The song has a strong Gordon Lightfoot vibe, both in your vocal delivery, the chord changes, and the guitars. That's a good thing.

Since you said all comments are welcome, I'll stupidly broach the usually taboo criticism of lyrics, and note that the first verse plays the pronoun game:

Failed to cry when it broke my heart
That doesn't mean it's not tearing me apart


In my 100% non-expert songwriting opinion, using nouns would give stronger lyrics:

Failed to cry when you broke my heart
That doesn't mean love's not tearing me apart


Of course, I've got zero number one hits, so what do I know? laugh

Anyway, nice song - thanks for posting!


-- David Cuny
My virtual singer development blog

Vocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?
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Originally Posted By: Tano Music
One of the things I liked about your song was how on the third line of your chorus you varied the melody instead of simply repeating is as most songs do. Really good guitar work, and I liked the banjo in the background.

I’m not a big fan of the la-la-la type of lyric substitution.. for my taste, I would add a different instrumental sound instead of the vocal there, but you had some nice harmonies to take advantage of that approach. Also, I would have taken it out with a fade..maybe you didn’t intend to leave that little ending segment in there..

Thanks for sharing!


Hey Tano, Thanks for the comments. I'm generally not a big la-la fan either, but my co-writer liked it... so it stayed. You are correct that I didn't mean to leave the ending segment, should have been a complete fade.


Originally Posted By: Janice & Bud
Nice write, arrangement and vocal/guitar performances....

We enjoyed the listen!

J&B

PS Cool guitar names smile


Thank you J&B. I appreciate the listen. I also have an archtop named... of course, Archie.


Originally Posted By: rayc
It's a very cool collaboration.
Nice BIAB arrangement and well played addition stuff.
The only nit I would pick is that the very 1st syllable is weak in comparison to the rest of the line - that'd only take a 10 tweak to fix then you have a dead set classic 70s singer songwriter piece.


Ray, Thanks for the listen & comments. Didn't really notice that weak syllable till you pointed it out.


Originally Posted By: SpaceDog
Great production on this. Very pro sound.
SD


Thank you very much SD.


Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
Very cool!! Really taps into the era of music that I love. Nice write, great vocal, and top production/mix. Everything works!! Take care. Greg


Thanks Greg. It's my era too.

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hi Achordocaste love this lightfoot old humble pie sixties seventies feel however modern great work greg,cathy thanks for sharing eric


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Good song and well mixed. Sounds early seventies and that's a good thing to me.
Credit both of you.Rob.

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Originally Posted By: floyd jane
Greg & Kathy,

A really nice song. Sounds like an old favorite...

Excellent arrangement and mix. Nice vocals and harmony.

Nice.

fj



Hey Floyd, thank you so much!


Originally Posted By: MarioD
I really enjoyed this one. I liked the mix, chord progression, instrumentation, lyric and your vocal.

This sounded like something that I would have in my oldies collection.



Thanks Mario. I'm becoming my own oldies collection. wink



Originally Posted By: Charlie Fogle
Originally Posted By: Ember - PG Music
This is a really great song. I especially enjoyed the lyrics, "I thought of kneeling down and saying a prayer. Hoping deep inside that you still care." Very strong. Thanks for sharing.


My thoughts exactly. Oddly, these exact lyrics were playing out as the song was playing on SoundCloud and I was commenting.

You are still one of my favorite vocalists here on the forum and I'm really getting into your melodies.

Enjoyed listening.



Hey Charlie, Thanks for the very nice comments. I appreciate it!



Originally Posted By: rsdean
Greg & Kathy,

Excellent song! Love the strong vocals and overall mix.

Really well done.

Bob



Thank you so much Bob... On behalf of Kathy as well.

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