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#517741 - 01/14/19 11:00 AM
[User Showcase]
No One Can See
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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No One Can See Imagine, if you will, Klaatu, The X-Files, and The Twilight Zone participating in a menage a trois. The resultant bast*rd offspring of this polyamory would be this song. I built this song around it’s opening line, which I wrote in a creative writing exercise 25 years ago. I worked on the music and lyrics in bits and pieces over the past year, putzing around on the piano. I juxtaposed the tone and mood of the music with the lyrics to belie the lyrical content, except at the bridge where they converge. That last sentence was a load of horse dung, wasn’t it? For the sound montage prelude to the song, I used a bunch of loops. I haven’t decided if I am going to keep it. In addition to the Real Tracks, I added synth parts. I’ve always liked the sound of an English horn, so I synthed that as the counterpoint in the first and second chorus, and for the closing melody line. I also did the George Martin trick where I wrote the melody backwards, played it , and reversed the “tape” for the instrumental solo after the bridge. Real Tracks2478 Bass, Acoustic, Held 2934 Guitar, Acoustic, Rhythm FolkySync8thsFi 1275 Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm PopUpliftHeld 1267 Synth Pad, PopShining 1030 Guitar, 12-String Electric, Fingerpicking RealDrums-NashvilleEven8^1-SideStick,Ride 2364 Synth, ElectroFlutes, Rhythm Pop 3197 Guitar, Electric, Soloist PopBalladMellowBrent RealDrums-EuroDance^1-BassClp,BassSnr 2578 Bass, Synth, RetroPop Ev16 2306 Synth, Rhythm BubblegumPopAccentSynth 2507 String Quartet, Rhythm PopEvenChamber 2973 Synth, Rhythm DancehallPercussive Scott LyricsThe CIA wiretaps my dreams Love on the counter espionage Hiding myself from galactic beams Tin-foiled human decoupage I never thought I would ever see the day When they would come to take you away I’m scanning the cosmic void for my love Searching for signs of you above I am a captive trying to set you free To boldly go where no one can see Under surveillance since the day we kissed In the bar room and then we brawled Asphyxiated by my murderess Breathless and humored and enthralled I never thought I would ever see the day When they would come to take you away I’m scanning the cosmic void for my love Searching for signs of you above I am a captive trying to set you free To boldly go where no one can see Extraordinary missionaries dancing on a sweating floor “Repent Harlequin” tick tocking my nevermore. I never thought I would ever see the day When they would come to take you away I’m scanning the cosmic void for my love Searching for signs of you above I am a captive trying to set you free To boldly go where no one can see
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#517749 - 01/14/19 11:26 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 03/07/18
Posts: 4316
Veteran
Registered: 03/07/18
Posts: 4316
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Scott, very entertaining! Cool lyrics! Unusual and fun. Reverse melody was a nice twist. English horn (and flutes?) sit very well. I like synths. I think electronica and acoustics on this tune work very well. Would totally keep it. Makes the whole composition stand out and more interesting. Not sure if you are open to views... Your vocals are great (in all respects!) but I feel that more bass is needed for the vocals to mix in better with the rest of the instruments. It feels to me that it is a bit on high side. My headphones are very "neutral". Maybe that is why it sounds like that. But on the other hand, if you are not open to comments, kindly disregard last few sentences and kindly do not hold it against me  I totally loved this! Thank you, Misha.
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#517777 - 01/14/19 02:43 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 10702
Loc: Florida
Veteran
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 10702
Loc: Florida
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Scott,
An extraordinary piece of music!
There's almost too much to comment on - but, it's ALL good!!
The other-worldly beginning is cool. (especially the harpsichord sounding thingy)
An interesting write. Big words. Interesting words. Cool rhymes. There should be some kind of prize to win for that. A lot of thought went into this, I'm sure...
Excellent vocal. Really nice mix - and considering the number and variety of instruments, that's an achievement! Well done.
The production values here is through the roof. Impressive.
I got a sense of Donovan and John Denver and David Bowie getting together in 2019 to write a song that they all could like...
fj
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#517814 - 01/14/19 04:42 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 12/26/11
Posts: 2498
Veteran
Registered: 12/26/11
Posts: 2498
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hi scott very engaging tune great mix and vocal spot on also loved the beginning well done sir thanks for sharing eric
_________________________
AMD (TM) 8150 3.60 GHz Eight Core Processor 64 bit windows 10 pro 64 bit os. sound card delta 1010 pci card 500 ssd drive 3 other drives guitars 1968 les Paul Custom and Cavin ae 185 Guitar boss Gt-100 pedal Carvin SRS Studio reference series
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#517829 - 01/14/19 06:19 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 11/19/12
Posts: 2360
Loc: Middletown, PA.
Veteran
Registered: 11/19/12
Posts: 2360
Loc: Middletown, PA.
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Great sounds!
holy moly
like the intro, like the Bowie-like melody
I like what floyd said about Donovan, Denver, and Bowie
that instrument solo (maybe Brent) is twisted and contorted beautifully
very interesting song
some of the best taking Biab and making it sound different
enjoyed,
Kenny
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#517873 - 01/14/19 09:46 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 04/13/16
Posts: 5136
Loc: Cooran Queensland Australia
Veteran
Registered: 04/13/16
Posts: 5136
Loc: Cooran Queensland Australia
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Clever start to your description.
The intro is interesting in & of itself but it doesn't relate to the rest of the song for me. Had you taken the melodic instrument into the 1st verse it may have tied them together but as is strikes me as an add on.
Your vocal delivery is, though a little thin, generally assured and smooth but you seem unnatural, almost staccato, when you sing "In the bar room and then we brawled".
With the change of drums for the section including "Extraordinary missionaries dancing on a sweating floor" I like the new pattern but the drums sound as if they're under a blanket and all to top ends are rubbed off making the section stand out for the wrong reason to my ears.
There's a cool reverse VST in guitarrig2 that can do what you did with the solo REALLY easily. It's a very effective sound if done sparingly as you've shown.
Cool song, well arranged and the balance within the mix is spot on.
_________________________
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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#517918 - 01/15/19 02:31 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 11/30/07
Posts: 4626
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Veteran
Registered: 11/30/07
Posts: 4626
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Nice! Very original. Great vocal, and I really like the horn going around the vocal, is that a synth? Worked really well.
That backwards melody you did, very cool ...
Great, enjoyed the listen!
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#517929 - 01/15/19 04:53 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 06/16/00
Posts: 1944
Loc: Texas
Expert
Registered: 06/16/00
Posts: 1944
Loc: Texas
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You have an interesting sonic experience going on here... The background tracks & effects heighten the lyrics you've chosen to sing... The intro & interludes add yet another element to the experience. You've done a good job on finishing up this 25 years ago creative writing exercise  I really enjoyed listening to your work.
_________________________
Jim
†=☮&♥
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#518028 - 01/15/19 12:38 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 11/29/06
Posts: 3126
Loc: Finland
Veteran
Registered: 11/29/06
Posts: 3126
Loc: Finland
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This song really shows extraordinarly creativity Great lyrics, captivating start with "The CIA wiretaps my dreams", I like "scanning the cosmic void" part very much. You have used also nice effects to give a space like feeling. Nice arrangement with interesting details and combination of synth, electric and acoustic guitars, flutes. Space cowboy music I would say. Reminds me somehow of Peter Sarstedt. Janne
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#518069 - 01/15/19 03:33 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Rustyspoon#]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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Scott, very entertaining! Cool lyrics! Unusual and fun. Reverse melody was a nice twist. English horn (and flutes?) sit very well. I like synths. I think electronica and acoustics on this tune work very well. Would totally keep it. Makes the whole composition stand out and more interesting. Not sure if you are open to views... Your vocals are great (in all respects!) but I feel that more bass is needed for the vocals to mix in better with the rest of the instruments. It feels to me that it is a bit on high side. My headphones are very "neutral". Maybe that is why it sounds like that. But on the other hand, if you are not open to comments, kindly disregard last few sentences and kindly do not hold it against me I totally loved this! Thank you, Misha. Thanks, Misha. I have a listen at the low end through some different speakers.
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#518070 - 01/15/19 03:34 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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Scott,
An extraordinary piece of music!
There's almost too much to comment on - but, it's ALL good!!
The other-worldly beginning is cool. (especially the harpsichord sounding thingy)
An interesting write. Big words. Interesting words. Cool rhymes. There should be some kind of prize to win for that. A lot of thought went into this, I'm sure...
Excellent vocal. Really nice mix - and considering the number and variety of instruments, that's an achievement! Well done.
The production values here is through the roof. Impressive.
I got a sense of Donovan and John Denver and David Bowie getting together in 2019 to write a song that they all could like...
fj FJ, Thank you for your kind words!
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#518071 - 01/15/19 03:35 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: F.M.M.]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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hi scott very engaging tune great mix and vocal spot on also loved the beginning well done sir thanks for sharing eric Eric, thank you for taking the time to listen to my musical experimentation.
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#518073 - 01/15/19 03:37 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: 44kfl]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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Great sounds!
holy moly
like the intro, like the Bowie-like melody
I like what floyd said about Donovan, Denver, and Bowie
that instrument solo (maybe Brent) is twisted and contorted beautifully
very interesting song
some of the best taking Biab and making it sound different
enjoyed,
Kenny Thanks, Kenny, for your time and your response.
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#518074 - 01/15/19 03:38 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: rayc]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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Clever start to your description.
The intro is interesting in & of itself but it doesn't relate to the rest of the song for me. Had you taken the melodic instrument into the 1st verse it may have tied them together but as is strikes me as an add on.
Your vocal delivery is, though a little thin, generally assured and smooth but you seem unnatural, almost staccato, when you sing "In the bar room and then we brawled".
With the change of drums for the section including "Extraordinary missionaries dancing on a sweating floor" I like the new pattern but the drums sound as if they're under a blanket and all to top ends are rubbed off making the section stand out for the wrong reason to my ears.
There's a cool reverse VST in guitarrig2 that can do what you did with the solo REALLY easily. It's a very effective sound if done sparingly as you've shown.
Cool song, well arranged and the balance within the mix is spot on.
Rayc, thanks for the feedback. I had boosted the top and low end on the percussion in the bridge. I'll go back and take another listen to that section.
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#518075 - 01/15/19 03:40 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: BlueAttitude]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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Nice! Very original. Great vocal, and I really like the horn going around the vocal, is that a synth? Worked really well.
That backwards melody you did, very cool ...
Great, enjoyed the listen!
Thanks. That is a synth on the English horn, and I thought it sounded mighty close to the real thing.
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#518076 - 01/15/19 03:41 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Jim]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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You have an interesting sonic experience going on here... The background tracks & effects heighten the lyrics you've chosen to sing... The intro & interludes add yet another element to the experience. You've done a good job on finishing up this 25 years ago creative writing exercise I really enjoyed listening to your work. Thanks, Jim. I always appreciate your positive feedback.
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#518077 - 01/15/19 03:43 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: jannesan]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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This song really shows extraordinarly creativity Great lyrics, captivating start with "The CIA wiretaps my dreams", I like "scanning the cosmic void" part very much. You have used also nice effects to give a space like feeling. Nice arrangement with interesting details and combination of synth, electric and acoustic guitars, flutes. Space cowboy music I would say. Reminds me somehow of Peter Sarstedt. Janne Thanks, Janne. I will have to look up Peter Sarstedt whom you referenced.
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#518198 - 01/16/19 10:16 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 06/09/16
Posts: 3323
Veteran
Registered: 06/09/16
Posts: 3323
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Full marks for originality - the lyrics and production are imaginative plus.
Really like the opening verse and the way you bring romance as well as sci-fi into the chorus.
Your vocals are always strong and clear - your tone and phrasing reminds me of Ian Tyson - giving the song a very 60`s feel.
Well done!
Robert
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#518202 - 01/16/19 10:34 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
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Registered: 12/29/12
Posts: 6347
Loc: Originally Missouri ... Now Al...
Veteran
Registered: 12/29/12
Posts: 6347
Loc: Originally Missouri ... Now Al...
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My comments for the next few days will have to be brief as my wife just returned home from the hospital (twice since Christmas) and needs lots of attention. I apologize for the brevity but it's necessary. Thanks for understanding!
Talk about interesting! loved the intro - I immediately thought of Rod Serling. Excellent mix and transitions. Your vocals are always so dang good! Loved it from beginning to end. best to you,
Alan
_________________________
BIAB 2022 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win10*8GB DDR4*I5-6th Gen*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120 Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops
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#518477 - 01/17/19 03:29 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: No One Can See
[Re: Robertkc]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
Veteran
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 2095
Loc: Virginia USA
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Full marks for originality - the lyrics and production are imaginative plus.
Really like the opening verse and the way you bring romance as well as sci-fi into the chorus.
Your vocals are always strong and clear - your tone and phrasing reminds me of Ian Tyson - giving the song a very 60`s feel.
Well done!
Robert Thanks, Robert. You are much too kind. I will have to give Ian Tyson a listen.
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