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#609775 - 08/07/20 01:44 PM
[User Showcase]
"Rail Way"
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Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
Expert
Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
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RAIL WAY Song about the Underground Railroad, done in up-tempo bossa style--my typical lyric/style mis-match! ================================== Master's shotgun we've just outrun; This was hard-won; And I can feel the thrill of daylight Filtering through the briars. With the men stowed on the railroad We steal away to the moon. Don't harbor illusions of what fate may hold; And for me, tomorrow's out there, I've got to have air. Beat the blood hound, 'cause I'm north-bound; Steaming the way to the sun; I cry for my brothers who didn't get through; In my heart, constantly pray for the day When they may ride these marvellous rails, Without the fear of gallows Or the jails. ===================================== Style is _JPLMBOG.STY (Medium Bossa Pollwinners 1) RT's: Rhythm Section: 1104 Guitar Nylon Rhythm; 464 Bass, Bossa; 470 Piano Bossa Solo Areas: 2142 Bari Sax Gary Solo; 2284 Ron Bass; 2288 Piano BossaKenny RealTracks in style: 2379:Sax, Tenor, Soloist BossaEric Ev 140 RealDrums [in style:BossaLewis^02-a:Brushes HiHat , b:SideStick HiHat] Midi: Strings, E Piano, Shaker, HiHat Elements
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#609798 - 08/07/20 06:04 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 06/28/06
Posts: 7175
Loc: Scottish Highlands
Veteran
Registered: 06/28/06
Posts: 7175
Loc: Scottish Highlands
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I REALLY liked this one, cool style and the melody blended in perfectly with the song
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#609805 - 08/07/20 06:58 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 06/05/12
Posts: 1081
Expert
Registered: 06/05/12
Posts: 1081
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Nice jazzy sounds. Good lyrics. Well done.
_________________________
My music can be heard at: The Cracks
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#609833 - 08/08/20 05:19 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 10773
Loc: Florida
Veteran
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 10773
Loc: Florida
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Good sounding tracks. The strings add a lot - well done.
There is a "jaunty, lightheartedness" to the melody and overall feel of the music that does not jive with the subject matter. I found that somewhat disconcerting.
The vocal has a fluctuation between being clear and slightly "boom-y" - as though sung too close to the mic at times. The vocal itself is quite good.
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#609840 - 08/08/20 05:49 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
Expert
Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
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Graham, jptjptjpt, and Floyd, thanks for taking the time to listen and the constructive feedback. Regarding the melody and feel of the music when compared to the lyric message--I can definitely see that. I wasn't so concerned about matching it up that way, but, as I worked on it, I was thinking of the joyful feel of freedom and escape. Anyway, I wrote the melody long before coming up with a lyric, and the use of cut-off syllables like "shot-gun" led me to this particular story line. Thanks again.
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#609914 - 08/08/20 04:10 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 12/21/13
Posts: 6737
Loc: Davis, CA
Veteran
Registered: 12/21/13
Posts: 6737
Loc: Davis, CA
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Really clever and engaging melody.......reminds me of Michael Franks!! And, that's as good as it gets in my book!! Really nicely arranged as well! BRAVO!! Take care. Greg
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#609980 - 08/09/20 05:55 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
Expert
Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
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Appreciate your time to listen and comment, Greg. Thanks.
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#610002 - 08/09/20 10:04 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 12721
Loc: GA USA
Veteran
Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 12721
Loc: GA USA
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We very much liked this - both the touching subject and the production.
The incongruity of the lyric and arrangement is, yes, different. However Tom Adams and Janice did a song about spousal abuse that was produced as an upbeat bluegrass tune . Tom suggested that songs like this are often more effective presented in such a manner. The more I pondered the more I agreed. Hearing your production took us back to those thoughts and, once again, we appreciate the effectiveness of that method.
Pardon, didn't mean to make it about us....
Well done!
J&B
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#610013 - 08/09/20 11:08 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
Expert
Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
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Interesting discussion--what happens if your pursue this type of lyric/feel mis-match. I never really thought about the topic being anything but exhilirating---the first breath of "free" air, the dash to catch "that train", the promise of real life--that was the POV that I had in mind. Thanks for the dialog--great sharing.
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#610014 - 08/09/20 11:11 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 08/09/10
Posts: 5423
Loc: New York
Veteran
Registered: 08/09/10
Posts: 5423
Loc: New York
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Great song and refreshing arrangement. I enjoyed this one.
Bob
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#610017 - 08/09/20 11:35 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 05/22/11
Posts: 3810
Loc: Florida
Veteran
Registered: 05/22/11
Posts: 3810
Loc: Florida
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I understand your view that the lyrics tell an exhilarating tale, but there is the very dark side of slavery and racism at the core of the story. The fact that the music doesn’t exactly match the mood at first glance makes the listener dig deeper and try to understand your intent. That is what makes it work. Nicely put together and well sung. You might look into Waves vocal rider. That would solve what floyd was talking about. It is on sale quite often. This was a very interesting song and made me listen more than once, Tom
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#610077 - 08/09/20 06:02 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
Expert
Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
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Bob,Tommy..thanks for taking a listen, and for your feedback.
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#610360 - 08/12/20 01:44 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 05/06/19
Posts: 116
Loc: Vale of Glamorgan
Apprentice
Registered: 05/06/19
Posts: 116
Loc: Vale of Glamorgan
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Nice very cool feel. I'm writing a smooth jazz thing at the moment and I really like the way you've done this, I can imagine being in Ronnie Scott's listening to this and that's the feel I want too. Tomorrow is out there...Good work!
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#610387 - 08/12/20 07:55 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
Expert
Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
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Thanks japokeapeg. I've always wanted to visit Ronnie Scott's! Appreciate your listen.
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#610579 - 08/13/20 01:44 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 12/08/11
Posts: 7074
Loc: Edmonton, Ab, Canada
Veteran
Registered: 12/08/11
Posts: 7074
Loc: Edmonton, Ab, Canada
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Very cool song. Really liked your vocal and how you mixed the song, Very clear well placed instruments. Well done
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#610621 - 08/13/20 06:38 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: "Rail Way"
[Re: Tano Music]
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Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
Expert
Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
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Appreciate your feedback, Scott!
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