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https://soundcloud.com/user-296497130/stuck-in-a-tale

Hi everyone!

That Coronavirus isn't taking off miraculously, as was promised by some. I saw a lot of song passing by on this forum dealing with this issue. I thought I could do that too, but more kind of...
It's a rock song and it treats this situation as if it were a bad dream I was trying to wake-up from. But nothing too seriously. It was fun doing the singing and playing it. I hope you like it too.
But as always, tell me what I did wrong, or could do better, or did right. I learn from that,

Hans
===============================================================
The instruments:
Style: _HIGHWAY.STY , tempo 90 bpm

RealTracks: 1417:Bass, Electric, Roots Rock
RealTracks: 2763:Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm Country Blues Rock
RealTracks: 2635:Guitar, Electric
RealTracks: ~594:Fiddle, Bluegrass
RealTracks: 2205:Guitar, Electric, Solo
RealDrums : NashvilleEven8^5-a:HiHat, b:Ride
Keyboard (me): Native instruments, Electr. guitar
===================================================================
The lyrics:
Stuck in a tale
(c) HwBerkhout, 09-08-20

Verse
I felt something happened
I'm stuck in a tale
The sky quickly blackened
It seemed I was in a jail

Verse
I wasn't able to draw attention
I was way back from everything
How do I end this detention
Through those bars I cannot wring

Chorus
Oh no, It's not easy
Can I wake-up or pay me a bail?
Could you tell me why you need me
in this so silly tale?

Verse
I then looked around me
and saw a tiny black door
How did it get there?
It wasn't here before

Verse
It was easy to open
And behind there shone a light
I crawled through, it took a moment
but I was blinded, it was too bright

Chorus
Oh no, It's not easy
Can I wake-up or pay me a bail
Could you tell me why you need me
in this so silly tale?
I hope this is to please me
But I don't see how that can be done
Is there a way to release me?
This ain't no more fun

Solo

Chorus
Oh no, It's not easy
Can I wake-up or pay me a bail
Could you tell me why you need me
in this so silly tale?
I hope this is to please me
But I don't see how that can be done
My only wish to come true
I love to meet you


Hans Berkhout
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Hello Birchwood,

Good song with well thought out lyrics in these sad times for humanity
Nice arrangement and pleasant accompaniment

Dero13 alias JaniJackFlash


Kindly regards
Derochette
alias JaniJackFlash
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Love the groove you have going on here!

Good vocals and lyrics also. Super mix.


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Hans,
A good rocking tune which showcases the strength of your vocals- when you light into the chorus for instance it gives me a jolt ( I`m actually not sure the doubled vocal is necessary, though its well done).
The locked down restrictions and confusions come through, with a funky beat to deliver the message.

Robert

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Morning Hans,

Nice groove on this one!

Guitar solo maybe a little loud, not much though, maybe 2 db or so.

Good song, well written and performed. Enjoyed!

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Hi Dero13 alias J. Jack Flash,

Needles to say I had a Rolling Stones song in my head when I read your alias. I wanted to mention it yesterday when I wrote you at first, but it was too obvious so I didn't. Until now. It's a day later, so...
Thanks a lot for your comment on my song. I replaced it seconds ago for another version. Dave told me the solo was some db too loud. And when he says so, you better adjust your stuff! He's (nearly) always right!
This is not an invitation to listen again, unless you're willing to. I just weant you to know how serious I take whatever you say on my songs.

Hans


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Hi Mario, Robbert and Dave,

Thank you for your comments on my 'Covid'song.

Hello Mario, it gave me a warm feeling not only what you wrote about the song, but the quarantine worked out so well for you and your wife!
It took one tiny little virus to correct 54 years of misbehaviour! We have to make a song about that, don't you agree?

Hi Robbert, I had to look up at Google Translate what a 'Jolt' was. It was no shock when I read the translation. I feel lucky you only had that jolt with the chorusses. I have a son who gets that jolt when I tell him I made a new song!
And it's funny you wrote the doubling wasn't necessary. I had some doubts using them, but the rhytme/sphere of the chorus sounds a bit tropical and I thought then that more voices would make the song lighter. And that is what we need too, given the main message.
But thanks for the very kind words!

Hi Dave, you gave me a busy day! At first it didn't look too hard to adjust the loudness of that sologuitar, but it did. One of my cats had ruined a part of the guitartrack I played myself. And it seemed I had no copy from that. So I had to play that again. But I noticed this problem only after I adjusted the volume of that solo, mastered it again and uploaded it to soundCloud. so I had to do it all over once more and played the missing part as well. All, because you told me to bring the volume down 2 db! Thanks for that! But of course you were right as I wrote to JJJ. And so thanks for that too! And also for your kind words about the song!

Stay safe all of you,
Hans


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Good, peppy tune that put me in its groove. Your vocal delivery fit the groove nicely. Nice effort all the way around, one of your better ones.


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Actually, the vocals came off a bit more Talking Heads than Rolling Stones to my uneducated ears. And that's not a bad thing at all.

Nice rocking song, great groove, loved the vocal, guitar solo was excellent.

Unrelated to anything, the expression is "needless to say". My favorite malapropism of that phase is "needles to hay". smile


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You mean this virus isn't a bad dream? Bummer, than I can't wake up from it! Really cool song!! Very catchy and fun to listen to!! Great job!!! Take care. Greg

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Hans,
Definitely one of top 10 from you. Dynamically delicious. I spot Ska-Blues-Rock fusion. Nice write lyrically and musically! Catchy chorus. Strong arrangement. Vocals...better, still high smile Drop the HQ, see what happens., I believe your vocals are strong enough to retain clarity and cut through the mix, without upping high end.
Thank you for sharing!

Misha.

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HA !! Had me tapping my feet and shaking my head !!! You captured the essence of a good rhythm !! No critiques from me. It's the energy that overcomes any issues. That's what I love !!

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A strong calypso feel in the verses.
You're approaching ice pick frequqncies on some of the vocals.
The 1st chorus, actually all of the choruses, bvox could be a little tighter.
Well done.
I'm not sure if you had this really loud or the ice pick did appear...my brain hurts.


Cheers
rayc
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Originally Posted By: TuneMonger
Good, peppy tune that put me in its groove. Your vocal delivery fit the groove nicely. Nice effort all the way around, one of your better ones.


Hi TuneMonger, thanks for your reply. I wish some more people think like you did. I hope my next songs will be better. That is always the challenge when you keep raising the bar ;-)

Originally Posted By: dcuny
Actually, the vocals came off a bit more Talking Heads than Rolling Stones to my uneducated ears. And that's not a bad thing at all. Nice rocking song, great groove, loved the vocal, guitar solo was excellent.

Unrelated to anything, the expression is "needless to say". My favorite malapropism of that phase is "needles to hay". smile


Hello David, I was revering to the nickname of Dero13 (J.Jack Flash) and not to my singing. I wouldn't dare. Also not to the Talking heads. I know my place...
But thanks a lot for your compliments. And btw: I do like your malapropism. I like messing up sentences as well, although it creates lots of confusion.


Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
You mean this virus isn't a bad dream? Bummer, than I can't wake up from it! Really cool song!! Very catchy and fun to listen to!! Great job!!! Take care. Greg


Hi Greg, sorry to say the virus is a fact. But the good news is: bad dreams are also a fact! Thanks for your so kind reply!

Hans


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That is a fine rocker and a good way to present the message of some hope.

Janice says she hears Bowie and Jagger in the vocals...they are cool.

Rock on Hans!

J&B


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That there is a great groove. There are some unexpected chord changes in there that really perked my ears. You sang this very well. I do agree that you could warm up the vocal a bit. It is such a great rocking feel that the eq can certainly be overlooked. I really liked it a lot. Tom

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Originally Posted By: dcuny
Actually, the vocals came off a bit more Talking Heads than Rolling Stones to my uneducated ears. And that's not a bad thing at all.

Nice rocking song, great groove, loved the vocal, guitar solo was excellent.

Unrelated to anything, the expression is "needless to say". My favorite malapropism of that phase is "needles to hay". smile


I think David's comments about the song itself reflect almost exactly what I was going to say. I got more of the Talking heads vibe. As David said, that's not a bad thing. Your strong, powerful vocal delivers the message and mood perfectly. Really cool tune! Liked it a lot.

Best to you. Be safe ...

Alan


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Hans,

Love that opening. A really great groove.

Mixed sounds good. You've gotten some good advice about the vocals.

A good write. Really rocking Chorus!

Cool solos.

I like it!!!!

.fj

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Wowser. Boy that's turning it up a notice. Very very cool backtrack and boy did you nail the vocal. That one had me tappin my toes. Well done Hans. The guitar kicked in while I was typing. Very cool as well. Please put a label on this song " Please play this loud !!! "

Last edited by Scott C; 08/29/20 02:13 PM.

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Really nice groove on this one, Hans. Enjoyed it. Keep on rocking!
Regards,
Leon

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