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21st CenturyJust for fun! I had these dumb lyrics floating around in my head for some time now so I decided to put them to music. BiaB style - part one - Blues Wolf - Slow Blues Shuffle I deleted the drums and replaced them with Groove Monkey MIDI loops with various Steven Slate's SSD-5 drums Bass - Ample sounds upright bass Piano - EZ Keys upright piano - preset - Saloon Guitar - AAS - Strum GS 2 - Blue Jass BiaB style - part two - Good'n Country - Bluegrass Style Drums and Bass same as part 1 Piano - Kontakt - Mandolin Guitar - VSTi Taylor Acoustic guitar Strings - Kontakt - RealiBanjo 21st Century v-I brought my house up to the 21st century I even got a doorbell that can see I can turn on the lights from my phone Even when I'm not home I brought my house up to the 21st century v-I voice activated a lot of commands But I'm a very clever old man Instead of using words that could astound I use some very clever sounds. I voice activated a lot of commands v-I staggered home last night from the local bar I was way to drunk to drive my car I tipped toed through the house I was as quiet as a mouse -----then it happened-- V-I farted and the lights went out And I'm roaming around in the dark I can't remember the word or sound That makes the lights come on I farted and the lights went out And I'm roaming around in the dark Hoping and a praying that I don't Wake up my wife Yvonne V-I stubbed my toe on the coffee table Limped around the best I was able Until I ran into a wall I guess I should have crawled v-I was hoping that nothing was broken then I walked through the door that was open Down the stairs my body went Landing face first in the basement V-I farted and the lights went out And now I'm laying in the dark Too little brains way too much braun I farted and the lights went out And now I'm laying in the dark I think I'll just lay here till dawn
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
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Mario, LOL!!! Loved it! Clever, fun and a great vocal...  Bob
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BRILLIANT !! MARIO ! , You sure are a clever auld man your words not mine !!,
Here I am thinking your not in too the modern gadgets Etc, preferring Midi like me !.
Well to write a song about something your not in too !.
Goes a long , long way !.
Humour in abundance ,
you know I come on to the forum and check first what your .. Signature saying is.. //a think that's what its called I was in Home Depot today and a young kid called me an old fart If you are looking for your child he is in a dryer in aisle 4.// .
well to me you just done it in a song , awesome !!.
loved the toilet sig , the only room etc.
Excellent stuff !!. We need to hear more Vocals from now on !
thanks
Last edited by beatmaster; 08/20/21 12:40 PM.
win 10 64 bit 16gb,i7 chip, ssd 500gb, m-audio air, ,Roland BK-7M, 1000,shure sm7b,sonar,acid,mixcraft, variety of plugins.Sample tank 3,Kontakt. TC Helicon Voicelive 3 2 . https://beatmaster1.bandcamp.com/releases
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Mario, LOL!!! Loved it! Clever, fun and a great vocal... Bob Thanx Bob. I appreciate the kind words and I'm glad you got a chuckle out of it, that was the intent for this song.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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BRILLIANT !! MARIO ! , You sure are a clever auld man your words not mine !!,
Here I am thinking your not in too the modern gadgets Etc, preferring Midi like me !.
Well to write a song about something your not in too !.
Goes a long , long way !.
Humour in abundance ,
you know I come on to the forum and check first what your .. Signature saying is.. //a think that's what its called I was in Home Depot today and a young kid called me an old fart If you are looking for your child he is in a dryer in aisle 4.// .
well to me you just done it in a song , awesome !!.
loved the toilet sig , the only room etc.
Excellent stuff !!. We need to hear more Vocals from now on !
thanks Thanx for these very encouraging words. I don't get this line "Here I am thinking your not in too the modern gadgets Etc, preferring Midi like me !." as everything in this one is MIDI. Maybe I fooled you into thinking they were RTs? I'm glad that you like this and that you got a chuckle from it.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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I'm still laughing as I type this Mario! You've got a clever imagination! Great job on the track by the way! Thanks, Torrey
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I don't get this line.... "Here I am thinking your not in too the modern gadgets Etc, preferring Midi like me !." as everything in this one is MIDI. Maybe I fooled you into thinking they were RTs?.
No you never fooled me in to thinking it was real tracks ?.
Not in too modern gadgets was a reference to the lyrics !!.....I brought my house up to the 21st century
I even got a doorbell that can see
I can turn on the lights from my phone
Even when I'm not home etc.
win 10 64 bit 16gb,i7 chip, ssd 500gb, m-audio air, ,Roland BK-7M, 1000,shure sm7b,sonar,acid,mixcraft, variety of plugins.Sample tank 3,Kontakt. TC Helicon Voicelive 3 2 . https://beatmaster1.bandcamp.com/releases
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HAHAHA!
Clever lyrics, Mario. Good to hear you singing 'em!!
Much enjoyed.
Love the sound of the bass! Those cymbals, though, not so much...
Still laughing!!
fj
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I'm still laughing as I type this Mario! You've got a clever imagination! Great job on the track by the way! Thanks, Torrey I'm glad that I made you laugh; that was this song's intent. Thanx for commenting.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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I don't get this line.... "Here I am thinking your not in too the modern gadgets Etc, preferring Midi like me !." as everything in this one is MIDI. Maybe I fooled you into thinking they were RTs?.
No you never fooled me in to thinking it was real tracks ?.
Not in too modern gadgets was a reference to the lyrics !!.....I brought my house up to the 21st century
I even got a doorbell that can see
I can turn on the lights from my phone
Even when I'm not home etc. Thanx for explaining this to me! I guess I don't even know what I'm writing 
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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HAHAHA!
Clever lyrics, Mario. Good to hear you singing 'em!!
Much enjoyed.
Love the sound of the bass! Those cymbals, though, not so much...
Still laughing!!
fj Thanx Floyd. About those cymbals what is wrong with them and how can I improve them? Thanx in advance for your time.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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HAHAHA!
Clever lyrics, Mario. Good to hear you singing 'em!!
Much enjoyed.
Love the sound of the bass! Those cymbals, though, not so much...
Still laughing!!
fj Thanx Floyd. About those cymbals what is wrong with them and how can I improve them? Thanx in advance for your time. Keep in mind...I am not a fan of cymbals (loud open hi-hats and rides). The cymbals in your mix are QUITE loud on my speakers - dominating your mix (my opinion, of course - and my speakers). They pull my ear throughout the entire song... so I guess you could say it's a volume issue (for me).
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About those cymbals what is wrong with them and how can I improve them? Thanx in advance for your time.
Keep in mind...I am not a fan of cymbals (loud open hi-hats and rides). The cymbals in your mix are QUITE loud on my speakers - dominating your mix (my opinion, of course - and my speakers). They pull my ear throughout the entire song... so I guess you could say it's a volume issue (for me). [/quote] I just listened again to this song and I can see your point. Thanx for bringing this to my attention.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Nice Job Mario, good for you. I really like the break between part 1 and part 2 and the style change (including the symbol crash  ) which fit the second part.
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Mario,
funny stuff! Lyrics should be printed on T-shirt. Ending is epic. Nice change to Dixieland style. I wish vocals would be a little more upfront.
Thank you for sharing.
Misha.
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It's insufferably hot and humid and Delta roars through our county.... So this was just what we needed for a BIG laugh! Sounded like a long night VERY clever indeed and lawd knows what else might be floating around in your head! We enjoyed it all -- nice band, arrangement and cool, albeit rare, vocal. J&B PS When it comes to music we have all the latest tech but not when it comes to lights and doorbells, etc.
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Nice Job Mario, good for you. I really like the break between part 1 and part 2 and the style change (including the symbol crash ) which fit the second part. Thanx so much Dan for listening and commenting. This was the first time I mixed two totally different styles together. I think each one fits the lyrics.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Mario,
funny stuff! Lyrics should be printed on T-shirt. Ending is epic. Nice change to Dixieland style. I wish vocals would be a little more upfront.
Thank you for sharing.
Misha. Thanx Misha for noticing the ending. As you can tell I'm not a singer and do very little singing, thus my vocal mixing skills are not up to par with my instrumental mixing skills. Thanx for pointing out about the vocal.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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It's insufferably hot and humid and Delta roars through our county.... So this was just what we needed for a BIG laugh! Sounded like a long night VERY clever indeed and lawd knows what else might be floating around in your head! We enjoyed it all -- nice band, arrangement and cool, albeit rare, vocal. J&B PS When it comes to music we have all the latest tech but not when it comes to lights and doorbells, etc. Thanx for listening and commenting. 1-You do not want to know what is floating around in my head! 2-Yep got up to date music tech but I do not even own a smart phone let alone a seeing door bell!
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Hahahahhahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Bloody clever and funny.
I don't think I have seen any lyrics or vocal from you before. This was good.
I think you have invented a new gadget. Instead of the "Clapper," you have created the "Flatulater."
thanks for the hearty laugh!
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I have a Homepod and a dog. I talk to them both a lot, so sometimes I mix up the names, and either wind up with my dog staring at me because she can't turn the lights on or Siri telling me no she doesn't want any suppie thank you. Life in the Speech Recognition Century is different.
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Haha!! Outstanding, Mario!! Man, what other "dumb lyrics" do you have in that musical head of yours. Seems even your farts sound like hand-claps. Not just a musical mind, but a percussionist's behind.
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Hahahahhahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Bloody clever and funny.
I don't think I have seen any lyrics or vocal from you before. This was good.
I think you have invented a new gadget. Instead of the "Clapper," you have created the "Flatulater."
thanks for the hearty laugh! Thanx for listening. I don't sing much so that is probably why you haven't heard me before. "Flatulater." Good one!
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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I have a Homepod and a dog. I talk to them both a lot, so sometimes I mix up the names, and either wind up with my dog staring at me because she can't turn the lights on or Siri telling me no she doesn't want any suppie thank you. Life in the Speech Recognition Century is different. Mark that was hilarious. You ought to write a song about that.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Haha!! Outstanding, Mario!! Man, what other "dumb lyrics" do you have in that musical head of yours. Seems even your farts sound like hand-claps. Not just a musical mind, but a percussionist's behind. Are you saying that I made an @ss of myself? Thanx for listening and commenting. And yes my mind is a half a bubble off center so you may hear more of my "dumb lyrics" at a later date.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Hi MarioD,
I had a lot of fun listening to your song and laughed a lot. The lyrics are excellent. I appreciated your touch of humor which makes us feel good.
Kindly regard
Derochette
alias JaniJackFlash
Kindly regards
Derochette
alias JaniJackFlash
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mario.
i'll second what ezekiel said.
you missed your calling imho as a comic.
really liked that change.
i like wacky songs like this.
best
om
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Mario , you have earnt that elusive jewel in the crown for this modern day classic novelty song ! Bravo.
cheers
Gary.
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Fun song. Very cleaver and well written. Nice tempo and style change. Good one.
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This was really funny and clever Good MIDI arrangement and your vocals really fit the mood. Really like the style change from blues to hillbilly country, like a glitch in a modern gadget. Experienced one today when my cooker hood decided to blink all its lights and keep terrible noise. I didn't know how to make it silent and I just pushed every button many times and finally it stopped. Janne
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Got me to laughing, Mario.
Hey, one of my class mates in middle school could squeeze his palms together in such a way to produce a pretty good imitation. Naturally, we never tired of it, especially those long, drawn out ones where timing was everything. Hmmm, my 60th HS is '22.
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Hey, one of my class mates in middle school could squeeze his palms together in such a way to produce a pretty good imitation. Naturally, we never tired of it, especially those long, drawn out ones where timing was everything. In 6th grade we all tried to master the "Constipated Apes" song with its flatulent climax, both palms to mouth. I wonder if that's ever been recorded? I know the J. Geils Band did "I See Your Heinie" on one album...
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Hi MarioD,
I had a lot of fun listening to your song and laughed a lot. The lyrics are excellent. I appreciated your touch of humor which makes us feel good.
Kindly regard
Derochette
alias JaniJackFlash I am so glad that you liked this little ditty. I do like comedy songs.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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mario.
i'll second what ezekiel said.
you missed your calling imho as a comic.
really liked that change.
i like wacky songs like this.
best
om I was the class clown in high school and I still love to kid around. I'm glad you like this song.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Mario , you have earnt that elusive jewel in the crown for this modern day classic novelty song ! Bravo.
cheers
Gary.
Thanx so much Gary.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Fun song. Very cleaver and well written. Nice tempo and style change. Good one. I'm glad you like this and thanx for listening and commenting.
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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This was really funny and clever Good MIDI arrangement and your vocals really fit the mood. Really like the style change from blues to hillbilly country, like a glitch in a modern gadget. Experienced one today when my cooker hood decided to blink all its lights and keep terrible noise. I didn't know how to make it silent and I just pushed every button many times and finally it stopped. Janne Thanx so much for listening and commenting. I'm glad that you like this song. Aren't these new electronic gadgets wonderful................not!
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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User Showcase
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 20,838
Veteran
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OP
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 20,838 |
Got me to laughing, Mario.
Hey, one of my class mates in middle school could squeeze his palms together in such a way to produce a pretty good imitation. Naturally, we never tired of it, especially those long, drawn out ones where timing was everything. Hmmm, my 60th HS is '22. Thanx for comment Ed. PS - just buy a fart machine: https://www.amazon.com/Novelty-Squeeze-Pooter-Machine-Farting/dp/B099PF1MT6/ref=sr_1_6?dchild=1&keywords=farting+machine&qid=1629761400&sr=8-6and save your hands! My 60th class reunion is in 24!
I want my last spoken words to be "I hid a million dollars under the........................"
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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User Showcase
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Joined: Oct 2016
Posts: 1,564
Expert
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Expert
Joined: Oct 2016
Posts: 1,564 |
Hah! Now anyone can do it! (And only $8.99)
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Joined: Jun 2021
Posts: 1,688
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Expert
Joined: Jun 2021
Posts: 1,688 |
I have a Homepod and a dog... Mark that was hilarious. You ought to write a song about that. I am not making this up, either. I just tried, to see what she'd say this time; I asked Siri if she wanted suppie. She answered, "Mostly I just want to help."
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Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
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User Video: Next-Level AI Music Editing with ACE Studio and Band-in-a-Box®
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 German for Windows is Here!
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 für Windows Deutsch ist verfügbar!
Wir waren fleißig und haben über 50 neue Funktionen und eine erstaunliche Sammlung neuer Inhalte hinzugefügt, darunter 222 RealTracks, neue RealStyles, MIDI SuperTracks, Instrumental Studies, "Songs with Vocals" Artist Performance Sets, abspielbare RealTracks Set 3, abspielbare RealDrums Set 2, zwei neue Sets von "RealDrums Stems", XPro Styles PAK 6, Xtra Styles PAK 17 und mehr!
Paket | Was ist Neu
Update Your PowerTracks Pro Audio 2024 Today!
The Newest RealBand 2024 Update is Here!
The newest RealBand 2024 Build 5 update is now available!
Download and install this to your RealBand 2024 for updated print options, streamlined loading and saving of .SGU & MGU (BB) files, and to add a number of program adjustments that address user-reported bugs and concerns.
This free update is available to all RealBand 2024 users. To learn more about this update and download it, head to www.pgmusic.com/support.realband.htm#20245
The Band-in-a-Box® Flash Drive Backup Option
Today (April 5) is National Flash Drive Day!
Did you know... not only can you download your Band-in-a-Box® Pro, MegaPAK, or PlusPAK purchase - you can also choose to add a flash drive backup copy with the installation files for only $15? It even comes with a Band-in-a-Box® keychain!
For the larger Band-in-a-Box® packages (UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, Audiophile Edition), the hard drive backup copy is available for only $25. This will include a preinstalled and ready to use program, along with your installation files.
Backup copies are offered during the checkout process on our website.
Already purchased your e-delivery version, and now you wish you had a backup copy? It's not too late! If your purchase was for the current version of Band-in-a-Box®, you can still reach out to our team directly to place your backup copy order!
Note: the Band-in-a-Box® keychain is only included with flash drive backup copies, and cannot be purchased separately.
Handy flash drive tip: Always try plugging in a USB device the wrong way first? If your flash drive (or other USB plug) doesn't have a symbol to indicate which way is up, look for the side with a seam on the metal connector (it only has a line across one side) - that's the side that either faces down or to the left, depending on your port placement.
Update your Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows® Today!
Update your Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows for free with build 1111!
With this update, there's more control when saving images from the Print Preview window, we've added defaults to the MultiPicker for sorting and font size, updated printing options, updated RealTracks and other content, and addressed user-reported issues with the StylePicker, MIDI Soloists, key signature changes, and more!
Learn more about this free update for Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows at www.pgmusic.com/support_windowsupdates.htm#1111
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 Review: 4.75 out of 5 Stars!
If you're looking for a in-depth review of the newest Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows version, you'll definitely find it with Sound-Guy's latest review, Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Windows Review: Incredible new capabilities to experiment, compose, arrange and mix songs.
A few excerpts:
"The Tracks view is possibly the single most powerful addition in 2024 and opens up a new way to edit and generate accompaniments. Combined with the new MultiPicker Library Window, it makes BIAB nearly perfect as an 'intelligent' composer/arranger program."
"MIDI SuperTracks partial generation showing six variations – each time the section is generated it can be instantly auditioned, re-generated or backed out to a previous generation – and you can do this with any track type. This is MAJOR! This takes musical experimentation and honing an arrangement to a new level, and faster than ever."
"Band in a Box continues to be an expansive musical tool-set for both novice and experienced musicians to experiment, compose, arrange and mix songs, as well as an extensive educational resource. It is huge, with hundreds of functions, more than any one person is likely to ever use. Yet, so is any DAW that I have used. BIAB can do some things that no DAW does, and this year BIAB has more DAW-like functions than ever."
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Forums66
Topics81,665
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Jan 19th, 2020
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