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#762929 04/22/23 08:55 AM
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Title: Revenge Song

Link: Revenge Song

The idea for the song came to me after watching the movie "Blues Brothers" again.
There is a running gag with this girl trying to kill Jake Blues in several bizarre attempts.
I know a girl who behaved (more or less, minus the killing) similarly after a good friend of mine left her.

Come to think of it, this could be part 2 of my last song, but the girl is no longer begging for "One More Time", she's starting to get serious.

The idea: make it loud and dirty
The result: it's loud and dirty

Feedback, good or bad, is as always very welcome.

Some background information:
  • apologies to Liam Neeson for the "Taken" quote. But the opportunity was just too tempting.
  • additional apologies go to my compatriot Johann Pachelbel. I hope the chorus doesn't hurt him too much...
  • a final apology to everyone for the overuse of the F-word. Believe me, I don't like this either.
    But this f*cking girl really f*cked my friend's best friend and his sister. She told me herself.
  • before you ask: no, I'm still happily married laugh
  • with a little nudging, forcing and swearing you can do amazing things with guitar RealTracks

F-word usage approved by Marty. Thanks my friend smile

Some technical information:
Style: _TINES.STY

The band:
Drums: PraiseWorshipUptempo16
Bass: 4363 (re-amped)
Guitars: (some re-amped)
4388
4386
4387
4385
4383
2x 3931
3738
3435
Piano: 894
Vocals: Natalie with BG vocals from Solaria and Cong.

You can find the lyrics in the next post.



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Goldmania Bella - A One-Man Girlband with no fans
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B.D.Thomas #762930 04/22/23 08:55 AM
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Title: Revenge Song

Verse 1:
Don't look back, I won't follow
I don't need you, I don't want you anymore
I'm just so angry, so f*cking angry
the things I'd like to do to you
are getting more and more

Chorus 1:
Stab you, cut you, kick your balls,
staple you to a wall,
burn your house and wreck your car,
beat you with my bass guitar.
F*ck your best friend and your sister,
be in general sinister,
be the nightmare of your life.
Sincerely, your no-more loving wife.

Verse 2:
I'll call my boss and tell him that his lovely wife
is leading a double life with you.
He will hate you
he will look for you
and he will find you
and will kill you
kill you

Chorus 2:
Stab you, cut you, kick your balls,
staple you to a wall
burn your house and wreck your car
beat you with my bass guitar.
F*ck your best friend and your sister
be in general sinister
be the nightmare of your life
haunting you forever

Bridge:
I'll be your nightmare
I'll be your Boogeyman
And I'll hurt you ... again and again and again and again
I'll be the pain inside your head
I'll be in your dreams
and I'll f*ck with your mind
till the end time

Chorus 3:
Stab you, cut you, kick your balls,
staple you to a wall
burn your house and wreck your car
beat you with my bass guitar.
F*ck your best friend and your sister
be in general sinister
be the nightmare of your life
sincerely, your no-more loving wife,
former wife

Chorus 4:
Stab you, cut you, kick your balls,
staple you to a wall
burn your house and wreck your car
beat you with my bass guitar.
F*ck your best friend and your sister
be in general sinister
be the nightmare of your life
sincerely, your no-more loving wife


Last edited by B.D.Thomas; 04/22/23 08:58 AM. Reason: Lyrics added

Making bits and bytes sound good...

Goldmania Bella - A One-Man Girlband with no fans
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B.D.Thomas #762966 04/22/23 02:06 PM
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That's quite the creative endeavor.

Musically it's tight and checks all the right boxes.
Lyrically.... It's creative as fu..... Well.... Yeah. I like it.

She sounds like someone I'd want to avoid in real life.

I really like this song. Well done. You show what is possible.

Last edited by Guitarhacker; 04/22/23 02:07 PM.

You can find my music at:
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Add nothing that adds nothing to the music.
You can make excuses or you can make progress but not both.

The magic you are looking for is in the work you are avoiding.
B.D.Thomas #763029 04/22/23 10:57 PM
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Hello B.D.
Good song
Great intro and ending
Natalie sings the lyrics unfortunately quite shy,
but it still sounds nice
Good work
Many greetings
Andi ;-)

B.D.Thomas #763095 04/23/23 05:58 AM
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Powerful and easily entertaining pop song. Great start with Natalie's low voice. She sounds good for the angry message, her vibrato has sort of repressed malicious hatred, good work! Maybe her voice could be made even more wicked sounding? The F word doesn't bother me, the story needs straightforward emotional eruption. Also funny like in "burn your house and wreck your car/beat you with my bass guitar".

Very nice dynamical differences between the verses & bridge and the chorus. The band is strong, I like the guitars and the piano playing together.

Catchy chorus, I really like the chord progression.

Janne


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Originally Posted By: Guitarhacker
That's quite the creative endeavor.

Musically it's tight and checks all the right boxes.
Lyrically.... It's creative as fu..... Well.... Yeah. I like it.

She sounds like someone I'd want to avoid in real life.

I really like this song. Well done. You show what is possible.

Thanks Herb, I really appreciate your feedback.
I have really known her for a long time and she is actually a calm and even-tempered person.
I think in this case a fuse just blew. When a woman really loves, anything can happen.
And he deserved some hate.


Making bits and bytes sound good...

Goldmania Bella - A One-Man Girlband with no fans
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B.D.Thomas #763337 04/25/23 12:01 AM
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Man, she is not someone I would want to mess with!

Absolutely top notch production on this, sounds great through the phones.

Great song despite all the F-Bombs!

I love that "Blues Brothers" movie BTW, watched it many times.

Good stuff, enjoyed.

PROJECT M #763371 04/25/23 06:50 AM
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Originally Posted By: PROJECT M
Hello B.D.
Good song
Great intro and ending
Natalie sings the lyrics unfortunately quite shy,
but it still sounds nice
Good work
Many greetings
Andi ;-)

Thanks Andi for listening and your nice feedback.
Greetings back from Germany smile


Making bits and bytes sound good...

Goldmania Bella - A One-Man Girlband with no fans
Listen on Spotify
Watch on YouTube
B.D.Thomas #763409 04/25/23 03:18 PM
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She's a bass player? No wonder she's angry. 'Cause bass players are just wannabe lead guitarists, right?

Nice work all around, it's just too bad the SynthV angry female rock vocalist isn't there. Yet. wink

From a songwriting perspective, I think cursing once or twice is works, but past that, it seems to lose impact and feels ineffective.


-- David Cuny
My virtual singer development blog

Vocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?
B.D.Thomas #763454 04/26/23 01:56 AM
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B.D.

Strong stuff. Start to finish.
A strong write.
A Super Strong Production. Really well done. A lot of Punch.
Excellent mix.

I just keeps getting better. Top Shelf.

fj

B.D.Thomas #763470 04/26/23 02:37 AM
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Originally Posted By: B.D.Thomas
[

F-word usage approved by Marty. Thanks my friend :)-amped)



HAHA! After our lengthy discussions, that is your only takeaway? Truth is I approved everything, but I only insisted on one thing: Beat with my bass guitar --a much more formidable weapon. When I "proof" your lyrics the only thing I can do is look for typos or spelling errors.

So what I enjoy most is the preview of your song. This one is crazy good, which is the perfect feel for such a crazy gal. You do an incredible job with synth voices. Natalie is really quite versatile --AND she chose the 6-string bass for her weapon of choice. I really like the dynamics you incorporate in this gem. BD. Well done!


Enjoy whatever happens!
marty

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@babumusic51
SoundCloud: https://soundcloud.com/marty-straub
and https://soundcloud.com/babumusic-5080285
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B.D.Thomas #763537 04/26/23 11:01 AM
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I enjoyed it but became stuck on sister/sinister each time it appeared.
The bridge is very Radiohead Creep.
I like the passive voice amidst louder rock & angry words.
It rocks well Norman!


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
B.D.Thomas #763561 04/26/23 11:07 PM
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B.D.
Very informative song smile
Good arrangement and mix! Excellent job on putting it all together. The only thing, vocals are too "angelic", need some sort of punk/grunge treatment. Distortion?
Thank you for sharing.

Misha.

B.D.Thomas #763624 04/27/23 08:04 AM
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Yikes! We don’t wanna mess with that girl. wink

The band and Natalie convincingly make us feel the smoldering heat from her anger.

Bud, being an upright bass player, said well at least hers wasn't as big as a couch! smile

Kudos!

J&B

P.S. You can’t go wrong with the Blues Brothers. smile


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B.D.Thomas #763636 04/27/23 10:24 AM
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B.D.,

That's great stuff! What an excellent production.

Much enjoyed!

Bob

jannesan #763711 04/28/23 09:12 AM
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Originally Posted By: jannesan
Powerful and easily entertaining pop song. Great start with Natalie's low voice. She sounds good for the angry message, her vibrato has sort of repressed malicious hatred, good work! Maybe her voice could be made even more wicked sounding? The F word doesn't bother me, the story needs straightforward emotional eruption. Also funny like in "burn your house and wreck your car/beat you with my bass guitar".

Very nice dynamical differences between the verses & bridge and the chorus. The band is strong, I like the guitars and the piano playing together.

Catchy chorus, I really like the chord progression.

Janne

Thanks Janne, I really appreciate your feedback.
Sounding wicked is difficult, I already added some distortion in some places to make it more gritty, but what I would need is some growl (think Pink (the singer)), but that's not possible (yet).


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Originally Posted By: BlueAttitude
Man, she is not someone I would want to mess with!

Absolutely top notch production on this, sounds great through the phones.

Great song despite all the F-Bombs!

I love that "Blues Brothers" movie BTW, watched it many times.

Good stuff, enjoyed.

Yeah, that's how bass guitarists are sometimes smile
Thanks for listening and your feedback, Dave. Much appreciated!


Making bits and bytes sound good...

Goldmania Bella - A One-Man Girlband with no fans
Listen on Spotify
Watch on YouTube
B.D.Thomas #763783 04/29/23 12:01 PM
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Super groove with great dynamics.
Great vocal and vocal effects - you are a master of synth vocals.
Two thumbs up.

PS - Please keep her away from me!


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dcuny #763823 04/29/23 11:52 PM
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Originally Posted By: dcuny
She's a bass player? No wonder she's angry. 'Cause bass players are just wannabe lead guitarists, right?

Nope, bass players hold it all together and make the band look good.
Ask Marty!

Originally Posted By: dcuny
From a songwriting perspective, I think cursing once or twice is works, but past that, it seems to lose impact and feels ineffective.

I think you're basically right. But I released a song a few weeks ago, and the publisher required that the "Explicit" box be checked for only one swear word, and that was at the end of the song, so most listeners will never hear it.
So I figured, "If I HAVE to check that box, I at least want it to be worth it" grin

Thanks for stopping by, David. Your feedback is always highly appreciated


Making bits and bytes sound good...

Goldmania Bella - A One-Man Girlband with no fans
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floyd jane #764010 05/01/23 07:47 AM
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Originally Posted By: floyd jane
B.D.

Strong stuff. Start to finish.
A strong write.
A Super Strong Production. Really well done. A lot of Punch.
Excellent mix.

I just keeps getting better. Top Shelf.

fj

Thank you, Floyd, for listening and your encouraging words.
I appreciate it very much!


Making bits and bytes sound good...

Goldmania Bella - A One-Man Girlband with no fans
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