That's a lovely, easy, gentle pain.
The ONLY thing I'd observe is that the narrative perspective changes oddly for the verse that reads...
"Say what you like about the pain of separation
Put it down to fate - or mistranslation
You saw a starting out, she saw a culmination
Watch her train as it pulls out of the station"
No biggie, no probs.
Lovely song.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe