OK – Like you John I’ll take the subject matter first and then we can turn our full attention to the music. You’re right of course, yet it’s stuff like this that supports, or, at the very least, reflects confidence in our economy. If shoppers did start thumbing their collective noses at fashion trends and ‘must-have’ brands then high street sales would be down, shops would be laying off staff, company profits would be down – and with them stock prices and pension values. And then where would we be?!

Right, my rant’s over too!

This has thoroughly retained the spontaneity and aggression with which you approached the project, and is generally the better for this.

I particularly like the thumping bass which really drives the thing forward.

Love the confident vox which manage to sound both 100% accurate (to my ears) and extremely sincere

Good punchy mix too

First time round, I found the interlude at 2:22 rather aimless, but perhaps this impression changes after a few listens.

Also, given the forceful and direct style of this tune and its message I wonder if the instrumentation may be a little too complex. I really like the original organ patch – the one that comes in during the intro. I may have been inclined to keep only that rather than the other patch that becomes more prominent at around 3:20.

Turning to the lyric..

I wonder if you could have focussed more exclusively on your theme (‘following fashion is silly’) rather than branching out to other thoughts (‘there’s a lot of rubbish on the TV’, ‘what a shame about the poor’…). The effect is to dilute somewhat the power of the message.

In the obvious comparison (dedicated follower of fashion), it’s interesting to note how Ray Davies sticks very closely to his theme. But then again, that’s why he’s Ray Davies and we’re on the PGMusic user’s showcase forum!

Also, with just a little more fine tuning, you could maybe have eliminated some of those ‘nearly’ rhymes of which there are several (magazines / green; Nic's / sick)

e.g.
Designer label on your shirt, you sure it’s not a fake?
Those trainers set you back a bomb cost pennies to make.

..and finally with regard to the lyric, I’ve heard that using specifics rather than generalities, tends to strengthen the message. (I hope Noel will back me up on this!)
You do this really well in refering to a specific department store, but could you also have found, say, a brand of ‘fashionable’ trainer and a trendy magazine title?

Anyway these are minor quibbles, particularly given that you bashed out the lyric fairly quickly.

Overall you can be proud of both the creative idea behind this project and the technical expertise with which you executed it.

Regards,

Marc

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