Previous Thread
Index
Next Thread
Print Thread
Go To
#844671 03/02/25 03:55 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
Veteran
OP Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
One of my first songwriting efforts, probably in 1982--just recently re-created with BIAB. If you are not collecting Social Security, you probably won't know what a lot this stuff is! I was so bowled-over by my songwriting mentor Dave Frishberg's songs (like "My Attorney Bernie", "I'm Hip!", and "Van Lingle Mungo"), that I wanted to see if I could write something clever, funny, and commenting on the times. Well, let me know if anyone remembers thesethose days..
-------------------------------------------------
I NEED ROMANCE!

Intro:
Listen here, my pretty dear, I'll get right to the point;
You flash those eyes, and I'm mezmerized,
So I hate to disappoint.
But I'd better make it clear right from the start--
I've been there before and gambled with my heart;
Yes, I've lost, but now I'm wiser for the pain.
No, I'll never trust my heart to love again--no way.
--
I NEED ROMANCE like the dollar needs inflation,
Just like Eve needed temptation,
Like Detroit needed Japan;
I NEED ROMANCE like a Ronco In-Egg Scrambler,
Or a great deal on a Rambler,
Or some stretch-elastic pants;
I'm not takin' a chance on romance.

I NEED ROMANCE like the nation needed Nixon,
Like a statue needs a pigeon,
Like the wilderness needs Watt;
I NEED ROMANCE like a case of halitosis,
Or a terminal prognosis,
Or a chicken needs a pot;
I'm not takin' a chance on romance.

Well, I've been hurt by the flirt,
So excuse me if I'm curt;
I've been burned by the yearn;
Guess I can say that I've learned!

I NEED ROMANCE like a calcium deposit,
Like a skeleton in the closet,
Like a postman needs a dog;
I NEED ROMANCE like a turkey needs Thanksgiving,
Or a tooth that needs a drilling,
Just like LA needs the smog;
I'm not takin' a chance on romance.

Well, I've been squeezed by the tease,
So excuse my manner, please;
I've been dinked by the wink;
Don't mind at all if I shrink!

I NEED ROMANCE like Chicago needs the Cubbies,
Just like legs that need the stubbies,
Like the Russians need Gdansk;
I NEED ROMANCE like another Ayatollah,
Or a rookie air controllah,
Just like Carter needed Lance;
But all it took was a glance,
And an invitation to dance,
Now I feel like takin' a chance on romance!
----------------------
M_JAZSWN.STY. Jazz Swing Piano Trio
RT 441 Trumpet Solo
RT2193 Piano Rhythm Easy Listening
Also used Midi Piano SuperTrack


Windows 11, Intel Core i5-8600T 2.3Ghz, 16 gig ram, BIAB 2025 MegaPak, SampleTank 4, Keystation49 Kybd, Neewer NW-800 mic
User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 8,633
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 8,633
Tom,

I think this is my favorite song from you. The cheerful and fun attitude in your vocal delivery is so good. A nice Jazzy arrangement with a killer trumpet solo.

Love so many of those unexpected and atypical rhymes. I don't think I've.ever heard "Gdansk used in a song before. The most original rhyme I've ever come up with is Schenectady and hysterectomy.

This is some really terrific listening pleasure - loved it!

And yes, I've been collecting Social Security for over 15 years - officially old. I'll be 78 on the 22nd of this month. Back in the middle 50s, our neighbor had a Nash Rambler - pea green and yellow.

Again, nicely done!

Alan


BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*32GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar

Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops

User Showcase
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 3,233
Veteran
Online Content
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 3,233
Tom, clever and fun ditty! Cool Great American Songbook vibe and nicely constructed BiaB backing. Love your vocal delivery, and the vocal FX chain you use on the verses supports the song really well. For constructive feedback: There's a slight vocal doubling effect on some sections that's not as enjoyable to my ears, and I'd recommend gain staging or compressing the vocals a smidge to even out the levels. Your tunes are SO deliciously classic in construction that a simple vocal FX approach may serve them best, even if you don't like your voice (relatable). This is a killer tune!

Last edited by DC Ron; 03/03/25 03:04 AM.

DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
Presonus Studio One
ASUS I9-12900K DAW, 32 GB RAM
Presonus Faderport 16
Too many guitars (is that a thing?)
User Showcase
Joined: Mar 2022
Posts: 950
L
Expert
Offline
Expert
L
Joined: Mar 2022
Posts: 950
It sounds like a great jazz classic. It's very cool.
Laurent

User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
Veteran
OP Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
Alan, DCRon, Laurent..thanks for checking this out..the feedback on the production is most helpful..Alan: I’m coming up on 75 next week; we owned a pink Rambler SWagon with “push-button” gear-shifting!


Windows 11, Intel Core i5-8600T 2.3Ghz, 16 gig ram, BIAB 2025 MegaPak, SampleTank 4, Keystation49 Kybd, Neewer NW-800 mic
User Showcase
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 8,560
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 8,560
Tom,

You have a real feel for these classic sounds. Great song - love the vocal. Always look forward to hearing what you come up with.

Bob

User Showcase
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 2,372
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 2,372
Hi Tom.
Love the lyric and the Danny Kay/Donald O'Connor treatment.
I can well imagine it in a movie. Clever stuff.
Excellent job.

Vic.

User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
Veteran
OP Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
Bob, Vic.. thank you mucho for listening and commenting!


Windows 11, Intel Core i5-8600T 2.3Ghz, 16 gig ram, BIAB 2025 MegaPak, SampleTank 4, Keystation49 Kybd, Neewer NW-800 mic
User Showcase
Joined: Aug 2024
Posts: 798
Journeyman
Offline
Journeyman
Joined: Aug 2024
Posts: 798
I'm only a minute in but I'm doing this: 🤣 laugh 🤣 laugh

That was very clever and right up there with This is a Fine Romance. It could be fun to split the vocals like Fitzgerald and Armstrong.

User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,041
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,041
Tom, this is extremely clever.
That "Ronco In-Egg Scrambler" line made me LOL
Such outstanding rhymes, I am jealous. For me it is spoon, June, and I'm finished!
Super vocal and backing tracks.
IMHO this is your best to date.
Loved it.


I'm in a fitness protection program. I'm been hiding from exercise.

64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 8,165
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 8,165
Very cool vocal and lyric. Would fit right in on a classic showtune or broadway. Excellent song


Scott Collingwood
https://soundcloud.com/scottt709
https://soundcloud.com/spiritlevel-ca
https://www.youtube.com/@SpiritLevel-ge3hm/
User Showcase
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,925
Veteran
Online Content
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,925
Oh man, what a great set of lyrics. Kind of the way every big Broadway show has one novelty tune with uber clever lyrics, this is it. Love the walk up on the resolving lines. This needs some kind of award. Seriously. Now just write the rest of the musical and you'll be famous! ; )


Windows 11, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 2i2, Sony Acid Music Studio 10, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
Veteran
OP Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
Thanks to all who checked in on this…it’s a genre of songs that I think would not be very possible today!


Windows 11, Intel Core i5-8600T 2.3Ghz, 16 gig ram, BIAB 2025 MegaPak, SampleTank 4, Keystation49 Kybd, Neewer NW-800 mic
User Showcase
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 20,806
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 20,806
Wow, there's so much to like about this 'creation'. You certainly nailed it. It is exactly what you set out to achieve.

I really liked the phrasing too.

Excellent!


BIAB & RB2026 Win.(Audiophile), Windows 10 Professional & Windows 11, Sonar Platinum, Cakewalk by Bandlab, Izotope Prod.Bundle, Roland RD-1000, Synthogy Ivory, Kontakt, Focusrite 18i20, KetronSD2, NS40M Monitors, Pioneer Active Monitors
User Showcase
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,825
Expert
Offline
Expert
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,825
Hi Tom,

Cool song and great lyrics - well done.

Best Regards
Nigel


Nigel Spiers
Christchurch, New Zealand
info@nzacoustics.com
User Showcase
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,888
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,888
Hi Tom,

Man, 1982?! Really well written song, love the lyrics!

Track sounds great too, especially like the trumpet.

Good one, enjoyed!

User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
Veteran
OP Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,360
AudioTrack/Nigel/Dave...thanks for listening in and for your supportive comments!


Windows 11, Intel Core i5-8600T 2.3Ghz, 16 gig ram, BIAB 2025 MegaPak, SampleTank 4, Keystation49 Kybd, Neewer NW-800 mic
User Showcase
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,456
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,456
Truly feel good song with funny and witty lyrics. Every line seems well considered and it makes me smile through the song waiting for the next exquisite thought. Nice musical tune where the band and your voice support perfectly the overall feel. Oddly reminds me of Jack Lemmon and the character he played in the movies.

Janne


Hear My Music:

Soundcloud
YouTube

Previous Thread
Next Thread
Go To

Link Copied to Clipboard
ChatPG

Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.

ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.

PG Music News
Band-in-a-Box 2026 Video: AI Stems & Notes - split polyphonic audio into instruments and transcribe

This video demonstrates how to use the new AI-Notes feature together with the AI-Stems splitter, allowing you to select an audio file and have it separated into individual stems while transcribing each one to its own MIDI track. AI-Notes converts polyphonic audio—either full mixes or individual instruments—into MIDI that you can view in notation or play back instantly.

Watch the video.

You can see all the 2026 videos on our forum!

Bonus PAK and 49-PAK for Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®

With your version 2026 for Windows Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, Audiophile Edition or PlusPAK purchase, we'll include a Bonus PAK full of great new Add-ons for FREE! Or upgrade to the 2026 49-PAK for only $49 to receive even more NEW Add-ons including 20 additional RealTracks!

These PAKs are loaded with additional add-ons to supercharge your Band-in-a-Box®!

This Free Bonus PAK includes:

  • The 2026 RealCombos Booster PAK: -For Pro customers, this includes 27 new RealTracks and 23 new RealStyles. -For MegaPAK customers, this includes 25 new RealTracks and 23 new RealStyles. -For UltraPAK customers, this includes 12 new RealStyles.
  • MIDI Styles Set 92: Look Ma! More MIDI 15: Latin Jazz
  • MIDI SuperTracks Set 46: Piano & Organ
  • Instrumental Studies Set 24: Groovin' Blues Soloing
  • Artist Performance Set 19: Songs with Vocals 9
  • Playable RealTracks Set 5
  • RealDrums Stems Set 9: Cool Brushes
  • SynthMaster Sounds Set 1 (with audio demos)
  • Android Band-in-a-Box® App (included)

Looking for more great add-ons, then upgrade to the 2026 49-PAK for just $49 and you'll get:


  • 20 Bonus Unreleased RealTracks and RealDrums with 20 RealStyle.
  • FLAC Files (lossless audio files) for the 20 Bonus Unreleased RealTracks and RealDrums
  • MIDI Styles Set 93: Look Ma! More MIDI 16: SynthMaster
  • MIDI SuperTracks Set 47: More SynthMaster
  • Instrumental Studies 25 - Soul Jazz Guitar Soloing
  • Artist Performance Set 20: Songs with Vocals 10
  • RealDrums Stems Set 10: Groovin' Sticks
  • SynthMaster Sounds & Styles Set 2 (sounds & styles with audio demos)

Learn more about the Bonus PAKs for Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®!

Video: New User Interface (GUI)

Join Tobin as he takes you on a tour of the new user interface in Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®! This modern GUI redesign offers a sleek new look with updated toolbars, refreshed windows, and a smoother workflow. The brand-new side toolbar puts track selection, the MultiPicker Library, and other essential tools right at your fingertips. Plus, our upgraded Multi-View lets you layer multiple windows without overlap, giving you a highly flexible workspace. Many windows—including Tracks, Piano Roll, and more—have been redesigned for improved usability and a cleaner, more intuitive interface, and more!

Watch the video.

You can see all the 2026 videos on our forum!

Introducing XPro Styles PAK 10 – Now Available for Windows Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!

We've just released XPro Styles PAK 10 for Windows & Mac Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 28 RealTracks and RealDrums!

Few things are certain in life: death, taxes, and a brand spankin’ new XPro Styles PAK! In this, the 10th edition of our XPro Styles PAK series, we’ve got 100 styles coming your way! We have the classic 25 styles each from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, and rounding out this volume's wildcard slot is 25 styles in the Praise & Worship genre! A wide spanning genre, you can find everything from rock, folk, country, and more underneath its umbrella. The included 28 RealTracks and RealDrums can be used with any Band-in-a-Box® 2026 (and higher) package.

Here’s just a small sampling of what you can look forward to in XPro Styles PAK 10: Soft indie folk worship songs, bumpin’ country boogies, gospel praise breaks, hard rockin’ pop, funky disco grooves, smooth Latin jazz pop, bossa nova fusion, western swing, alternative hip-hop, cool country funk, and much more!

Special offers until December 31st, 2025!

All the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 10 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea), or get them all in the XPro Styles PAK Bundle for only $149 (reg. $299)! Order now!

Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.

Video: XPro Styles PAK 10 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!

XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2025 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.

Introducing Xtra Styles PAK 21 – Now Available for Windows Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!

Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Windows & Mac Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) is here with 200 brand new RealStyles!

We're excited to bring you our latest Xtra Styles PAK installment—the all new Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher)!

Rejoice, one and all, for Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box® is here! We’re serving up 200 brand spankin’ new styles to delight your musical taste buds! The first three courses are the classics you’ve come to know and love, including offerings from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, but, not to be outdone, this year’s fourth course is bro country! A wide ranging genre, you can find everything from hip-hop, uptempo outlaw country, hard hitting rock, funk, and even electronica, all with that familiar bro country flair. The dinner bell has been rung, pickup up Xtra Styles PAK 21 today!

In this PAK you’ll discover: Energetic folk rock, raucous train beats, fast country boogies, acid jazz grooves, laid-back funky jams, a bevy of breezy jazz waltzes, calm electro funk, indie synth pop, industrial synth metal, and more bro country than could possibly fit in the back of a pickup truck!

Special offers until December 31st, 2025!

All the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 21 are on special for only $29 each (reg $49), or get all 21 PAKs for $199 (reg $399)! Order now!

Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 21.

Video: Xtra Styles PAK 21 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!

Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 21 requires the 2025 or higher UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.

Introducing XPro Styles PAK 10 – Now Available for Mac Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!

We've just released XPro Styles PAK 10 for Mac & Windows Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 28 RealTracks and RealDrums!

Few things are certain in life: death, taxes, and a brand spankin’ new XPro Styles PAK! In this, the 10th edition of our XPro Styles PAK series, we’ve got 100 styles coming your way! We have the classic 25 styles each from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, and rounding out this volume's wildcard slot is 25 styles in the Praise & Worship genre! A wide spanning genre, you can find everything from rock, folk, country, and more underneath its umbrella. The included 28 RealTracks and RealDrums can be used with any Band-in-a-Box® 2026 (and higher) package.

Here’s just a small sampling of what you can look forward to in XPro Styles PAK 10: Soft indie folk worship songs, bumpin’ country boogies, gospel praise breaks, hard rockin’ pop, funky disco grooves, smooth Latin jazz pop, bossa nova fusion, western swing, alternative hip-hop, cool country funk, and much more!

Special offers until December 31st, 2025!

All the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 10 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea), or get them all in the XPro Styles PAK Bundle for only $149 (reg. $299)! Order now!

Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.

Video: XPro Styles PAK 10 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!

XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2025 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.

Introducing Xtra Styles PAK 21 – Now Available for Mac Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!

Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Mac & Windows Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) is here with 200 brand new RealStyles!

We're excited to bring you our latest Xtra Styles PAK installment—the all new Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher)!

Rejoice, one and all, for Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box® is here! We’re serving up 200 brand spankin’ new styles to delight your musical taste buds! The first three courses are the classics you’ve come to know and love, including offerings from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, but, not to be outdone, this year’s fourth course is bro country! A wide ranging genre, you can find everything from hip-hop, uptempo outlaw country, hard hitting rock, funk, and even electronica, all with that familiar bro country flair. The dinner bell has been rung, pickup up Xtra Styles PAK 21 today!

In this PAK you’ll discover: Energetic folk rock, raucous train beats, fast country boogies, acid jazz grooves, laid-back funky jams, a bevy of breezy jazz waltzes, calm electro funk, indie synth pop, industrial synth metal, and more bro country than could possibly fit in the back of a pickup truck!

Special offers until December 31st, 2025!

All the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 21 are on special for only $29 each (reg $49), or get all 21 PAKs for $199 (reg $399)! Order now!

Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 21.

Video: Xtra Styles PAK 21 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!

Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 21 requires the 2025 or higher UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.

Forum Statistics
Forums57
Topics85,339
Posts791,094
Members39,858
Most Online25,754
Jan 24th, 2025
Newest Members
Max Gain, BEAN223, Brazilboyz, doccawudi, StratMan1965
39,858 Registered Users
Top Posters(30 Days)
jpettit 356
MarioD 221
DrDan 213
Noel96 157
DC Ron 150
Rob Helms 126
Today's Birthdays
There are no members with birthdays on this day.
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5