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Here is a light-hearted song about a husband who gets drunk and fails to get the provisions in for Christmas lunch !! I wrote the words and the melody. I used 464 Bossa Bass , 918 Piano Cha-Cha, 708 Nylon Guitar Bossa and Real Drums Bossa Brushes The Synth V Vocalists are "Hayden" and "Solaria". I mixed it in Cubase. Bread and Cheese for Christmas Bread and cheese for Christmas, got no turkey, no mince pies No cake or Christmas pudding, I can’t believe my eyes Bread and cheese for Christmas, no crackers, wine or beer, The Ocado man has crashed his van , no Christmas cheer this year.
We left the shopping order late, the wife’s misunderstanding I thought the list could not be missed, but she left it on the landing, The orders were clear, as she bent my ear, go out and get some grub, I’m not impressed, I’m getting dressed and I’m going down the pub.
Many hours later my eyes are seeing double I staggered to the local Tesco I’m really in some trouble To my despair, the freezers bare so it’s cheddar and a bloomer, I hope the wife won’t give me strife and retain her sense of humour.
Bread and cheese for Christmas, got no turkey, no mince pies No cake or Christmas pudding, I can’t believe my eyes Bread and cheese for Christmas, no crackers, wine or beer, The Ocado man has crashed his van , no Christmas cheer this year.
Through the garden gate I go, I’m seeing two front doors, Two keys, two locks, two houses – I’m crawling on all fours. On the step she’s standing , she’s not looking too amused, I really can’t be blaming her, I should never get so boozed
Bread and cheese for Christmas, got no turkey, no mince pies No cake or Christmas pudding, I can’t believe my eyes Bread and cheese for Christmas, no crackers, wine or beer, The Ocado man has crashed his van , no Christmas cheer this year. No Christmas cheer this year.Happy Holidays to all !!
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Here is a light-hearted song about a husband who gets drunk and fails to get the provisions in for Christmas lunch !! I wrote the words and the melody. I used 464 Bossa Bass , 918 Piano Cha-Cha, 708 Nylon Guitar Bossa and Real Drums Bossa Brushes The Synth V Vocalists are "Hayden" and "Solaria". Bread and Cheese for ChristmasHey fun tune! The poor character got off easy in the story....haha I feel for him though. Nicely mixed. I had one question on the vocalists form your song description: It says the "The Synth Vocalists... ." What does that mean? Thanks for sharing! Chad
Chad
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Hi Kelvin,
A very enjoyable, humorous song! Very nicely written and presented. Very nice! I like it a lot.
Alan
BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*32GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops
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Clever and funny lyrics. I especially like this stanza: "Through the garden gate I go, I’m seeing two front doors, Two keys, two locks, two houses – I’m crawling on all fours. On the step she’s standing , she’s not looking too amused, I really can’t be blaming her, I should never get so boozed"  That must be you playing the chimes/bells? Synths sound real. It must take time to program the voices.
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Fun little ditty. A pity SynthV doesn't have any British singers, but Hayden and Solaria sound great. Cha-cha-cha! 
-- David Cuny My virtual singer development blogVocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?BiaB 2025 | Windows 11 | Reaper | Way too many VSTis.
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Joined: Dec 2006
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Here is a light-hearted song about a husband who gets drunk and fails to get the provisions in for Christmas lunch !! I wrote the words and the melody. I used 464 Bossa Bass , 918 Piano Cha-Cha, 708 Nylon Guitar Bossa and Real Drums Bossa Brushes The Synth V Vocalists are "Hayden" and "Solaria". Bread and Cheese for ChristmasHey fun tune! The poor character got off easy in the story....haha I feel for him though. Nicely mixed. I had one question on the vocalists form your song description: It says the "The Synth Vocalists... ." What does that mean? Thanks for sharing! Chad Thank you very much Chad - the vocalists are synthesized and you can fine-tune the way the words are sung by tweaking the phonemes and many other settings. Its great for people like me who really can't sing a note in tune - I used to write just instrumental music, but now I can use these voices and I can at least see if a song is any good or not after I add the singing. You can read about the software here
Last edited by Kelvin; 11/23/23 05:56 AM.
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Hi Kelvin,
A very enjoyable, humorous song! Very nicely written and presented. Very nice! I like it a lot.
Alan Thank you very much Alan - I appreciate your sentiments !
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Fun little ditty. A pity SynthV doesn't have any British singers, but Hayden and Solaria sound great. Cha-cha-cha!  Thanks David - yes, maybe they will develop British soon - I hope so !
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Clever and funny lyrics. I especially like this stanza: "Through the garden gate I go, I’m seeing two front doors, Two keys, two locks, two houses – I’m crawling on all fours. On the step she’s standing , she’s not looking too amused, I really can’t be blaming her, I should never get so boozed"  That must be you playing the chimes/bells? Synths sound real. It must take time to program the voices. Thanks very much. I didn't actually play the chimes live - its a software instrument from Spitfire Audio - I played it in on my keyboard ! The voices can sound amazing when the software is in the hands of an expert - I am still learning the nuances, so I am very pleased that you think they sound real !
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Funny lyrics and a very interesting story --as long it's the "other" guy. Catchy chorus and it's even a fun sing-along like all good Christmas songs should be. Love it, Kelvin.
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Kelvin, this is a very catchy and clever song. You did a great job on those synth voices. Super mix.
My wife had her driving test today. She got 8 out of 10. The other 2 jumped out of the way!
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Funny lyrics and a very interesting story --as long it's the "other" guy. Catchy chorus and it's even a fun sing-along like all good Christmas songs should be. Love it, Kelvin. Thank you very much - happy holidays !
Last edited by Kelvin; 11/24/23 04:23 PM.
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Kelvin, this is a very catchy and clever song. You did a great job on those synth voices. Super mix. Thanks very much !!
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We all need a fun song at times like these. Good one.
Vic
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