DEVELOPMENT This song came about from the merging of two separate ideas: I had recently decided I wanted to write and record a song in the style of the late Elliott Smith; and I had a song idea about a father and daughter surviving in an apocalyptic future. Given both are dark, and I won't go into the passing of Elliott Smith, I thought it appropriate to make them one project. I was late to the Elliott Smith party having first become aware of him after reading that Elliott Smith and Ron Sexsmith were two favourite artists of Neil Finn. There are several Elliott Smith hallmarks that I have used for this song: he often wrote in 3/4 time; he recorded his vocals very closely mic'd; his vocals were often doubled and mixed L and R; he used fingerpicking styles; often used major II and minor iv chords ; and basic drum patterns such as on Waltz #2 and Alameda.
If you are unfamiliar with Elliott Smith's work, my suggestions would be to check out 'Waltz #1', 'Waltz #2 (XO)', 'Alameda', "Behind the bars', 'Just somebody that I used to know'.
RECORDING SUMMARY Style is _FATIGUE.STY (Fatigue Sweet Songwriter Waltz)
RealTracks in style: 776:Bass, Acoustic, PopWaltz Ev 085 RealTracks in song: 4902:Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm SongwriterPopWaltzJohn Ev 120 RealTracks in song: 3268:Cello, Background CelticWaltzNatalie Ev 100 RealTracks in song: 3652:Guitar, Acoustic, Fingerpicking IndieWaltz Ev 150 RealTracks in song: 2936:Guitar, Acoustic, Fingerpicking FolkWaltzFintan Ev 100 RealDrums in Song:PopRockWaltzModernEv,Hat2,Ride2: a: Snare, HiHat b: Snare, Ride
Vocals – doubled and panned 20% left and right B section piano – step input via Reaper piano roll using LABS Acoustic Piano plugin Simple drum pattern step input via Reaper piano roll using Cakewalk VSTi SI Drum kit Mixed in Reaper 7.6.2
LYRICS (Chord sheet attached) VERSE 1A It’s been a year since we’ve been on the road Scavenging for food, hiding from sight It’s cold and we labour with our load I repair my left shoe, not as good as my right
VERSE 1B We’re heading north, seeking sun, survivors on the run My daughter I keep from all eyes Bridges give us shelter at night, can’t trust no-one We’ve almost come to grief once or twice
VERSE 2A It’s not clear who started the war Some say it went nuclear, but I’m never sure How quickly the looters arrived Violence and bloodshed – the fittest survive
VERSE 2B I hope she doesn’t ask again, what happened to her mum I don’t think I could lie once more Thinking she’s alive somewhere, it’s all that keeps her going She doesn’t know she means the same to me
BRIDGE I know I’m not alone, but I’m tired and I’m scared With no place for home She needs a chance to shine, but it’s all on me I can’t look in her eyes
VERSE 3A There’s word there’s a group up near Watervale Who grow their own food, and know how to survive I hope they won’t turn us away Or at least take my daughter and keep her alive
VERSE 3B If we make it all the way, Jenny’s taken under their wing Even if they won’t let me stay Who’d have thought, not long ago, we were living in a dream Before our lives got blown all away
Last edited by Andrew Dee; 03/05/2610:38 PM. Reason: Drum kit added
Lovely song, Andrew. Quite nice vocals that cradle the lyrics beautifully. Like the backing band a lot. REALLY love the piano counter melody near the end--it's delightful.
Lovely tribute to Mr Smith, too. Gone too soon for sure. Your song also reminds me of the lads from Liverpool, who of course had a way with waltzes, too.
Great song!
Last edited by DC Ron; 03/06/2608:28 AM.
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My new favorite from you I think, Andrew. I like the concept of the song with the father and daughter surviving together, good idea, and executed well.
Good vocal, good band, and the simple drum part fits the song perfectly.
Lovely song, Andrew. Quite nice vocals that cradle the lyrics beautifully. Like the backing band a lot. REALLY love the piano counter melody near the end--it's delightful.
Lovely tribute to Mr Smith, too. Gone too soon for sure. Your song also reminds me of the lads from Liverpool, who of course had a way with waltzes, too.
Great song!
Thanks Ron. I was hoping my vocal sounded more like ES but alas, just sounded like me trying to sound like ES! Despite recording only 5cm from the mic capsule, and trying to suppress any plosives and keep my voice at a consistent level, I couldn’t manually compress my singing in a way that accentuated any inherent anxieties like ES does. Maybe I just have too good a life to be able to reproduce that? However, I think my vocal still has enough in it to illustrate a father’s pain yet trying to remain calm for the benefit of his daughter.
Thanks for your appreciation of the band and the piano part as well!
Originally Posted by BlueAttitude
My new favorite from you I think, Andrew. I like the concept of the song with the father and daughter surviving together, good idea, and executed well.
Good vocal, good band, and the simple drum part fits the song perfectly.
Also enjoyed your video, well done.
Hi Dave! Glad you like it. The drum sound ended up being better than I thought. I originally used the RealDrum track but found it didn’t reflect the sound that Elliott Smith used, so a simple ‘boom - hit - hit’ worked. It had a mechanical quality to it that sounded like a long arduous trek, and when I heard the kick drum played by itself, it reminded me of a heartbeat, so I decided to use that for intro and outro.
Regarding the video, I use Clipchamp and select a heap of suitable video shots from the library and compile and cut them. I had selected a clip of a footprint in sand, and when it came time that the father had to walk away and leave his daughter, that single footprint said so much - for me the most emotive part of the video.
Thanks for listening and watching!
Originally Posted by laurent4114
The video and the song manage to create a special atmosphere of darkness and resignation. It's very well done. Laurent
Thanks Laurent! In the video, I went monochrome to get the ‘gloom and dread’ of an apocalypse, but in hindsight, the section ‘we were living in a dream’ should have been colour. I tried to use a ‘less is more’ approach in the video and let the viewer imagine what is in between - I hope I succeeded. Let’s hope none of us have to experience this. This year, my wife and I became grandparents for the first time, and I hope our world heads back to sense for a long time so that my granddaughter gets to experience the same quality of life that I have. Thanks for listening and watching!
Not familiar with any of the names you referenced.(EDIT: i looked him up and oh, my, what a tragic and grisly story. Shame to see talent go out like that.) Your song reminded me of "The Road." (film or book). I like post-apocalyptic tales a lot and so I enjoyed your song a great deal. As always, I appreciate your creativity and always give bonus points for that. Fine outing here, Andrew, keep up the great work!
Last edited by TuneMonger; 03/06/2607:18 PM.
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I'm somewhat ignorant of Elliott Smith’s work, although I feel we’ve tried some of his material in the past, but nothing comes readily to mind. What strikes me most is the storytelling and the musical simplicity, although I'm sure it’s not as simple as it sounds. You’ve done an excellent job lyrically telling the story, I think this is one of your finest in that area. The lyrics kept me listening and interested until the end, I wanted to know how they were going to survive. All done without any repetition or a hook, but still keeping the listener captivated. The music was at a level that didn’t interfere with the lyrics but at the same time carried the story on. Beautiful in its simplicity. Vocally too, you were on form, a nice gentle melodic performance. Video was really good as well. This is/was worthy of several listens. Couldn’t fault it Andrew, so very good on so many levels. I dub thee Andrew the Songsmith!
Not familiar with any of the names you referenced.(EDIT: i looked him up and oh, my, what a tragic and grisly story. Shame to see talent go out like that.) Your song reminded me of "The Road." (film or book). I like post-apocalyptic tales a lot and so I enjoyed your song a great deal. As always, I appreciate your creativity and always give bonus points for that. Fine outing here, Andrew, keep up the great work!
Thanks Rob! I'm glad you looked up Elliott Smith and hopefully sampled some of his work. 'The Road' is a piece I had forgotten about - I was more thinking 'The last of us' when I wrote this, although I didn't read up on it in case it influenced my writing. So as it stands, my brain has imagined an amalgam of the two. I've often said that as songwriters, we stand on the shoulders of giants - a kind way of saying nothing is original in songwriting - just evolution of others' works. Regarding Ron Sexsmith, some say he is a cross between Paul McCartney and Michael Buble.
I notice I have many more views on YouTube this time around, and I suspect it's because I mention Elliott Smith in the title - such is his cult following. Thanks for listening!
Originally Posted by K-Dub Ya
That’s a significant song Andrew, I'm somewhat ignorant of Elliott Smith’s work, although I feel we’ve tried some of his material in the past, but nothing comes readily to mind. What strikes me most is the storytelling and the musical simplicity, although I'm sure it’s not as simple as it sounds. You’ve done an excellent job lyrically telling the story, I think this is one of your finest in that area. The lyrics kept me listening and interested until the end, I wanted to know how they were going to survive. All done without any repetition or a hook, but still keeping the listener captivated. The music was at a level that didn’t interfere with the lyrics but at the same time carried the story on. Beautiful in its simplicity. Vocally too, you were on form, a nice gentle melodic performance. Video was really good as well. This is/was worthy of several listens. Couldn’t fault it Andrew, so very good on so many levels.
Hi Lee! Most people's entry to the ES world is usually via 'Between the bars' which featured on the soundtrack of the movie 'Good Will Hunting'.
For all I bang on about the lyrics just being the vehicle for the music, I realise the lyrics are all important on this one, albeit I also tried to make the feel of the song support the dark mood of the storyline. I'm hoping the C#m7b5 also helped with that mood - I'm surprised you hadn't noticed it? Anywho, I'm glad the lyrics kept you to the end - something for me to think about for future songwriting.
As far as the singing goes, I wonder if I should try this gentle recording style more often? I'm usually 15cm from the mic and singing with full lungs (not 5cm and gentle as in this case), but maybe I'm overtrying?
Quote
I dub thee Andrew the Songsmith!
Ah - so that's why you're called K-Dub Ya! Thanks for listening and watching and for your fine appraisal. We might have to try some ES again next meet?
Andrew
Last edited by Andrew Dee; 03/06/2610:26 PM. Reason: you're - not 'your'
First I listened to a video from Elliott Smith, because I didn't know him (Between the bars). Then I listened to your song. I heard some (or a lot) similairity in style and vocals. You did that very well. And about your song; impressive and apocalyptic, but with a sweet (Elliott-like) melody. On YouTube I also wrote things alike what I wrote here, but I also hope we will never have to face things like this. In more and more parts of the world it became a reality, unfortunately.
But your voice, the song, the lyrics; I all loved it a lot! Hans
Hi Andrew, I was not familiar with Elliott Smith or his work so I googled him; what a tragic life and like many musicians from that era died to soon. I was captivated with this song, the rhythm, arrangement, and lyrics drew me in; I could picture myself in the same situation, i.e. trying to save my daughter at all costs. BTW great video. Everything is perfect. Loved it
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Hans, Bob and Mario, Thank you for listening and viewing and your generous comments. I am glad that I have introduced some forum members to the late, great Elliott Smith. Fortunately, he had a distinctive style that was possible to mimic, which I hope I did justice to. Andrew
Hi, Andrew. I know nothing of Elliott Smith (though now I will), but I DO know a good song when it plays. This waltz is terrific, and I love the vocals, soft yet forceful. I also love that video. Very creative write and production. Well done.
Enjoy whatever happens! marty
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Hi, Andrew. I know nothing of Elliott Smith (though now I will), but I DO know a good song when it plays. This waltz is terrific, and I love the vocals, soft yet forceful. I also love that video. Very creative write and production. Well done.
Thanks Marty! Elliott’s music is definitely worth checking out - if you like folk rock. Andrew
Andrew it's a cool thing. Occasionally your vocal pitch bothered me, but only very occasionally. The song, arrangement and mix are excellent. I'm a Sexsmith fan more than Smith but they are both fabulous and worthy reference points.
Cheers rayc "What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
Andrew, this is an intriguing piece. Your unusual chord changes and slow tempo in 3/4 time really add heaviness to the story of trudging north after a horrible tragedy. It's very well crafted. I'm not familiar with Elliot's music. I looked him up in Wikipedia to get a summary of who he was. John
I hesitate to say "a beautiful" song, because of the grizzly story it tells – most fitting is: "impressive". Especially in times like these. I like it, and it's beautifully sung as well!
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Andrew it's a cool thing. Occasionally your vocal pitch bothered me, but only very occasionally. The song, arrangement and mix are excellent. I'm a Sexsmith fan more than Smith but they are both fabulous and worthy reference points.
Thanks Ray - glad the song pleased your ears. Regarding my vocal, many years ago I decided I was not going to let my vocal imperfections stop me - I think I am with many others on this forum in this matter - and in this case, they suit the song topic and also match Elliott a smith’s own imperfections. I doubt whether I will attempt to mimic Ron Sexsmith however - his singing voice is sublime. Thanks for listening!
Originally Posted by John Walradt
Andrew, this is an intriguing piece. Your unusual chord changes and slow tempo in 3/4 time really add heaviness to the story of trudging north after a horrible tragedy. It's very well crafted. I'm not familiar with Elliot's music. I looked him up in Wikipedia to get a summary of who he was.
Thanks John! For chord progressions, I am not averse to taking ‘the road less travelled’ as long as they sound good (I.e. can lead to a satisfying melodic and harmonic outcome). Knowing your own diverse music styles, I recommend you do a deep dive into his work - it’s very rewarding.
You mention ‘trudging north’ - I was wondering if any northern hemisphere members would comment on ‘heading north for the sun’ being an abnormal concept, but maybe everyone realised it was set in the southern hemisphere, or assumed the bomb cloud was south? Most scenarios of a nuclear apocalypse are assumed to be set in the northern hemisphere.
Originally Posted by Opur
I hesitate to say "a beautiful" song, because of the grizzly story it tells – most fitting is: "impressive". Especially in times like these. I like it, and it's beautifully sung as well!
Hi Opur! I think the beauty in the melody and 3/4 time was aimed at expressing the love and care for the man’s daughter, set against some somewhat dark chord moves. The vocal recording technique worked well and I think I will use it again sometime. Thanks for listening and commenting - I think your insights will be gratefully received by many forum members, just as I have appreciated them. Andrew
I hadn't heard about Elliott Smith before (and I found Ron Sexsmith just last year thanks to Spotify recommendations, what a great voice), but I'll listen to him more soon.
I enjoyed the intimate feel you have created with the vocals and the warm and dry mix. It all feels like a mini movie soundtrack and of course the vivid video supports that vision. 3/4 works very well, somehow I associate it with lullabies. The piano and the cello add fatality, and those drums are perfecto. Interesting and sad story which you have described nicely and interpreted sedately in your unique style.
I can hear some Elliott Smith, especially in the chording, but also The Beatles ... and some artist I still haven't figured out But most importantly, I'm glad that I got to know your music and enjoy your songwriting skills while you are still alive
Thank you Janne! If you like the style of Elliot Smith and Ron Sexsmith, they both have depth in catalogue that is very rewarding.
‘Mini movie soundtrack’ - I hadn’t thought along those lines but I think you have described well what I was trying to do - I just didn’t know how to categorise it.
Quote
But most importantly, I'm glad that I got to know your music and enjoy your songwriting skills while you are still alive
Ha ha! I’m glad to accommodate your preferences! Seriously, I’m enjoying using some of my time in retirement to record my music, learning as I go, and writing some more. Thanks for listening and your wonderful comments! Andrew
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Despite recording only 5cm from the mic capsule, and trying to suppress any plosives and keep my voice at a consistent level, I couldn’t manually compress my singing in a way that accentuated any inherent anxieties like ES does. Maybe I just have too good a life to be able to reproduce that? However, I think my vocal still has enough in it to illustrate a father’s pain yet trying to remain calm for the benefit of his daughter.
Anywho, I'm glad the lyrics kept you to the end - something for me to think about for future songwriting. 
But most importantly, I'm glad that I got to know your music and enjoy your songwriting skills while you are still alive 
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